“Maybe it was for the best…”

Yuri was engrossed in her own thoughts as she stood at the veranda of the person’s bedroom; she had a glass of wine in hand as she looked up at the starry night sky up there. She always loved looking at the stars and trying to match some constellations; it was kind of a hobby Yuri had garnered when she felt lonely and isolated because of the problems that had raised from the group three years ago. Although it sounded and looked stupid to most, Yuri found it rather comforting to the soul; the night sky was not going to judge her for feeling upset or depressed – it was bringing the right comfort she needed instead. 

Her arms were wrapped around herself, shivering from the cold bitter wind blowing against her skin harshly. She enjoyed having some solidarity to herself when it was in the middle of the night; the only time she had some peace and quiet without anyone interrupting her thoughts or imaginations. 

“What are you doing out of bed?”

Before Yuri could turn around, a pair of arms wrapped around her waist and engulfed her in a back-hug; just the kind of embrace Yuri enjoyed the most. She rubbed the hands around her tenderly before bringing one to her lips, pressing soft kisses on the woman's knuckles. Yuri always marveled at how soft her beloved's skin was, untainted and unbelieveably fair. A charming smile appeared on her face when Yuri felt the woman behind her bury her face into her shoulder; her brave woman who had the biggest heart possible was nothing but a huge baby in front of her.

“Why are you awake?”

“Because you weren’t there?”

“Always the charmer, Sica.”

Jessica huffed and slapped Yuri’s shoulder harshly; she turned Yuri around to face her, “are you actually trying to act smart with me now, Seobang? Because I’ll smack you if I have to.”

Yuri shook her head cutely at her ice princess, loving the sight of Jessica blushing because of her own antics. She had long forgotten how the honeymoon phase in a relationship was like because of the amount of they had been through – here Jessica was, bringing that cute demeanour with her again. The charm and wit Jessica possessed was overwhelming; it only added to the countless reasons why Yuri fell in love with her in the first place. Yuri should have known though: once she stepped in, there was no stepping out of the paradise named falling in love with the blonde.

How could she ever come to the absurd thought that falling out of love with Jessica was ever possible in the first place? 

Jessica couldn’t hold back a smile anymore; she leaned in and cupped her girlfriend’s cheeks, “aigoo, you’re being awfully cute tonight. Why are you awake at this time though?”

“I was just thinking about you…” Yuri grinned when Jessica let out a small whine, punching her shoulders in embarrassment. She could see the tip Jessica’s cute ears turning red, and her heart warmed to know that she had the same effect over Jessica. It was a doubt she had for so long, but this was really assuring her beyond anything. “Well, I’m not lying! I really did have a good dream about you so...”

A sigh left Jessica’s lips when she saw the handsome smirk playing on the tanned woman’s face in front of her; she couldn’t believe how good-looking Yuri was even though they were growing older by the year. She ran her fingers over her lover's defined cheekbones, leaning in to give Yuri a light peck on the nose for being so wonderful. Yuri had been the best person who understood Jessica's problems and made sure to talk it out with her whenever things got rough between them.... well, minus the period where they were separated because of the whole September incident. 

Talking about that…

Jessica could remember what they talked about that night Yuri tried to fool her into believing the most unbelievable story: Amber and Yuri dating?

Oh God.

Flashback.

“YAH! OUCH!”

Jessica smiled ever-so-sweetly and pressed the cotton swab on Yuri’s cheek even harder, “does it hurt now? I wonder why it didn’t hurt when you were pushing me away!”

Yuri was about to defend herself quite aggressively with a claim of her own when she felt another hard one on her cheek; gosh, this woman was so heartless sometimes. She tried to stop herself from pouting or only more teasing was going to come instead of medication for her wounds. Yuri had already made the ice princess angry and irritated enough as it is; and if you're seriously wondering what wounds Yuri's talking about, they are bruises made by none other than Miss Jessica Jung herself. 

Jessica had pinched, slapped and scratched her – okay fine, the scratch was an accident when she fell off the bed – after finding out that Yuri had the intention of planning such a prank even after seeing her cry like a baby. Another thing that really ticked Jessica off more than broke her heart was the fact that she had already broke up with Tyler almost a year ago.... which Taeyeon definitely already told Yuri about. 

“Does it hurt a lot?”

The pouting Yuri looked up and saw Jessica with a much softer gaze in her eyes, examining the bruises on her wrist this time. She moved closer and tried to look at Jessica’s face, “I’m fine… what is it, Sica? Are you okay?”

There was clear hesitation on the ice princess’s face when she was about to look up, almost as if she was getting embarrassed with the way Yuri was looking at her. Jessica was rarely unable to look up at Yuri and let their eyes meet unless she didn’t want Yuri to know something. It was making Yuri very suspicious because of this and she quickly moved closer, trying to force Jessica to look up at her whether it was because of embarrassment or something else – it didn’t matter.

Jessica gasped involuntarily when she felt Yuri’s hands cup her cheeks, making her look straight at her.

“What is it?” Yuri asked softly, her thumbs now rubbing Jessica’s cheeks lovingly. She was now seeing how cute the chubbier Jessica looked right now and it was a heart-warming thing to witness. She had always wanted Jessica to have some weight on her because she looked so skinny for a period of time, and it didn't look healthy at all. Yuri sighed and moved her face closer, “Sica, you don’t have to feel embarrassed about anything in front of me, do you? I won’t judge you for anything.”

“I just feel terrible…”

Jessica raised her hand to stop Yuri from interrupting, wanting to take her time with this little confession.

“I’ve always wanted to stay with you girls until our 10th anniversary… even more if possible. If it wasn’t for that playing with our contracts and all… I… I’d most likely be there with you guys right now…”

Yuri wasn't going to hear any more about this damned situation they were all in; they all knew what threats Jessica had received then and it was the same as now. It was terrible, heartless and most of all, unbelievable that the company had done this to a girl group who only brought money and more money to them. True to a certain extent that Jessica did have her own faults by throwing all the decision-making to them but she was confused; no one would be clear-minded enough to make decisions that wouldn't hunt them for the rest of their lives. It was a low blow, even for a company like SM.

Jessica continued to express her regrets and worries in Yuri's arms, getting all the comfort she needed from the one person who made her feel as if she was the only one in the world. 

“I love you.”

Yuri pulled away from the embrace and tilted Jessica’s head upwards, closing the gap with a smile, “I love you more.”

Flashback end.

“I wish I could make it up to you for everything you've been through, Sica…”

“What’s there to make up for?” Jessica whispered, resting her forehead against Yuri’s; she was not a fan of playing the victim card and she didn’t like how Yuri felt sorry for something she couldn’t do anything about. Yuri was too kind-hearted for her own good, and that's why Jessica was there to stop anyone from taking advantage of her. “What could you possibly do? That is the one who controls everything and even Kim Young Min can’t do anything about it. She has some policy for it.”

Yuri nuzzled her nose deeper into Jessica’s neck, enjoying the feel of Jessica’s fingers running through her locks; she needed to be assured from time to time that she wasn’t just useless. Yuri did try her best to do something about it, and if it wasn't the girls who woke her to reality... her job might not even be existing right now. She had been rash and uncontrollable when she was thrown the news of Jessica's exit; for that, she would forever be sorry to her girls who continued to stay strong no matter what the circumstances were.

Her pride, however, was divided very equally - for the girls and Jessica who had reached their 10th anniversary together. 

Jessica held Yuri’s hand and gave it a gentle squeeze, leading her beloved back into their bedroom.

“Anyway, baby… it’s in the middle of the night, and I don’t want you scaring poor maknae if she has to wake up early for her schedules or even Sunny when she comes home for practices.”

Yuri let herself get pulled by Jessica, a grin automatically appearing on her face when the ice princess didn't look back once; a clear sign of Jessica getting embarrassed. Jessica was indeed the only ice princess who had an entire system full of warmth within her; in short: a warm ice princess indeed. She had this endless care for people whether they cared about themselves or not, and that was how Yuri fell for her so hard in the first place. Yuri had drowned herself in a bottomless pit consisting of Jessica's lovable and important values and there was no getting out of it.

Jessica pulled Yuri to lie beside her, pushing the latter’s head into the crook of her neck where Yuri always found it easier to fall asleep. She didn’t wait for her black pearl to say anything, knowing that the protests would all be meaningless anyway.

“Have I ever told you how lovely you are?”

“Of course,” Jessica giggled heartily, one hand rubbing Yuri’s back and the other getting entangled in her dark locks. She sighed before saying v