"Hey," Amber said quietly, pulling Henry into a quick hug. He tried not to notice how warm and nice she felt in his arms. "Krystal's asleep, so try not to be too loud, Okay?"

Henry nodded, shucking off his shoes and throwing himself onto Amber's bean bag. She sat on the floor next to him, pulling her knees up to her chest and wrapping her arms around them. 

"Sometimes...I get tired of being here," Henry said. "I start missing home. Not constantly being pointed out for not understanding every little thing." He rubbed his head. "The culture...and I know it's twice as hard for you, so I really shouldn't be complaining."

She shook her head, slipping one of her small hands into his. "No. I understand. It's nice being reminded that we're not alone in this." 

"I wonder when I'll start feeling like I really belong? It's been years and I still feel slightly out of step."

She squeezed his hand. "Just think if the few times it doesn't matter. Like when you're with friends or writing music or eating some of the best Korean barbecues with the prettiest girl in Korea." 

Amber flipped her non-existent hair, making Henry laugh.

She really was pretty, although in a very unique way. Her nose was slightly too large for her small face, but she managed to make it work. Especially with her burst of self-confidence over the past few years.

"Amber?" a girlish voice called from the nearby bedroom. 

Amber turned away from him, getting to her feet. "I'll be right back."

Henry sat twiddling his thumbs, waiting for her to return. He was never that good at being patient though, so he ended up pacing around the room, then found himself at Amber's slightly parted bedroom door. He couldn't help peeping inside. He was surprised to see Krystal with her arms around Amber, her short hair gently. It wasn't often he saw people being so gentle with her. It was sweet to watch, but also, somehow, made him a bit jealous. He wondered what it would be like to have Amber so unguarded and sweet.

He pulled away from the door, feeling like he was intruding. He'd almost made up his mind to leave when Amber came back.

"You want some water or something?"

He nodded, this time settling on her couch.

"I didn't mean to interrupt."

Amber shook her head. "It's fine. Krystal just didn't feel like staying alone since Jessica and their parents are out of town. And I only have my puppies with me right now so-"

Henry took a sip of the water she'd given him. He could understand. Sometimes when he was alone, his house seemed to echo. It was like he could feel every bit of extra space in his house and all the thoughts wondering if he'd made a mistake in coming to Korea would resurface.

"Can I...hold you like she did?" he asked cautiously.

Amber peeped at him from beneath her thick lashes. "You spyin' on me?"

He nodded. "A little."

She twisted her shirt between her hands, then got onto the couch beside him, pressing close. He dropped his arm around her shoulder, then slid it down her arm and pulled her in tight, tucking her head beneath his chin. 

"Hmm..."

"What?" she asked, still seeming slightly nervous about the situation. 

"This feels nice." 

A corner of tilted up. "Thanks. I do my best to be as cuddly as possible." 

He laughed, this time wrapping both arms around her and moving her so she was partially to his chest. He rubbed her back gently, the fabric of her shirt sliding between his palm and the smooth skin of her back. He wondered what it would feel like to touch her...without the shirt. His hand betrayed him, dipping down to the hemline. A pinky made contact and Amber stiffened slightly in his arms. 

Henry let out a slow, shaky breath. "Umm...I don't...I don't know what this is," he admitted. "I keep thinking-" 

She pushed away from him, her cheeks flaming, heart beating faster than it should. 

"Wait," he said, grabbing her hand. "We've known each other a long time and feelings can get confused, you know?" 

He leaned in close. "Have you ever wondered-" 

She shook her head and got to her feet. "It's just a phase," she said. It has to be... She'd wondered a few times over the past weeks what it would be like to kiss him. It would probably be okay at first, then...and then what? He was always talking about girl's figures. He liked her personality just fine, but would he be embarrassed to go around with her as his girlfriend? On top of that, what if their feelings were just confused or they were just lonely and turning to each other cause they knew how much the other understood? What if they ruined everything? He was one of her best friends. 

"But what if it's not?" He stood up. 

"I think it's late and maybe you should go."

He took her gently by her shoulders and held her in place until she looked up at him. 

"I'm not ready for this, Henry," she said softly. "When I think about starting something with you, it's either all or nothing. I'm only twenty-one. I'm definitely not ready to start something as serious as it would have to be with you. And I'd rather not lose your friendship by messing with this before we're even sure we know what we're feeling." 

"A kiss could help." 

She rolled her eyes and put her hands against his chest to push him away. "No. I was kinda hoping we'd never have to talk about this and it would just go away on its own." 

"What if it doesn't go away?" 

Amber bit her lip. "It will. I mean, it has to, right? It came out of nowhere, literally." 

"Not exactly nowhere..." 

She closed her eyes and shook her head as if to will the words away. "I really don't think-"

"Just one kiss?" He took her chin in his hand and tilted her face up. "I haven't been able to get your lips out of my mind." 

She cursed her stupid curiosity. Would it be worse to kiss him now and get it over with or keep thinking about what it would be like to kiss him? 

"If we don't feel anything, we'll just pretend this night never happened." 

"And if we feel something?" 

He took her small face between his palms, gliding his thumbs beneath her full, pink lower lip. She really had some of the most beautiful lips. 

She grasped his wrist, not sure if she wanted to stop him or just keep him in that place. Hold him in that moment where she couldn't seem to catch her breath and her knees almost felt too weak to keep her standing. 

"You're so pretty," he whispered, taking in each detail of her face up close. Those long eyelashes, large, sensitive eyes, angled cheekbones, pouty lips...

"I never really thought you were that handsome..." she murmured.

He laughed, loving her humor and the way she .

Love.

. 

He pinched his lips in regret and kissed her lightly on the forehead. "You're right. I'm stupid. I don't think I could just kiss you and let it go. It's either all or it's nothing."

"I've always known I was smarter than you." 

Henry tapped her nose. "I'll call you tomorrow, okay?" 

She nodded. 

"I might not answer." 

"You'll answer." 

She shrugged. 

"You always answer." 

"I might accidentally on purpose forget to charge my phone tonight." 

"Amber~," he sighed. 

She laughed. "I'll probably answer." 

He left, grinning, realizing the feelings he had for her definitely weren't going to go away anytime soon. Maybe never. Now all he had to do was wait until she was certain too.