I had no courage to bring up what I just read online. So, even when we got back inside his car, only he talked and I responded with short answers. Even though I had so many questions, I didn’t know how to talk about it. Did he know about it? Why didn’t he tell me, if he knew? Was he actually going on the show? Or was it fake news?

            “How come you’re so quiet?” he asked, squinting at the road. It was so dark and he has been driving the whole day, so he was tired.

            “Mm? Aniya, just full from eating so much,” I shrugged. “Do you want me to take over driving?” I asked since he looked like he was ready to pass out.

            “Aniya!” he said defensively. “It’s our first date, why would I make you drive??” he scoffed.

            “Kibum-ssi, think rationally. We’ve been out all day, you’ve been driving this whole time, from Seoul to Daegu and now Daegu to Seoul, if you fell asleep while behind the wheel, we could get into an accident, is your pride more important or our safety?” I said calmly. I didn’t want to hurt his feelings so I said it with kindness in my eyes. No matter how shocked and hurt I was from the article, I wasn’t going to be petty about it and ignore him. He suddenly brought the car to the side of the road and put it in ‘park’.

            “How could you be so rational and hurt my pride at the same? Wuah, you’re really unique you know that?” he scoffed as he removed his seatbelt.

            “Aigoo, that’s not it, I just want you to rest and also, I wanted to show you my driving skills,” I said and winked.

            “Omo, puahahahaha! Why am I scared out of nowhere now…” he hissed and got out of the car and we switched seats.

            “Ready, Kibum-ssi?” I asked him as he held the handle on the ceiling of the car with one hand and the other wrapped around the seatbelt strap. “Relaaax, I’m a pretty good driver, Kibum-ssi!” I said confidently and released the emergency break and drove out.

            “Ok! Ok! Let’s go!” I think he tried to sound excited, but his voice was full of fear. I drove as I normally did and sang along to whatever song was playing.

            “Yah! Yah! Yah!” he yelled. I jumped in my seat, almost swerving the car.

            “Wae! Wae??” I shouted back.

            “You’re driving way too fast! I know there are only few cars around but oh my God, woman,” he was tapping his chest to calm his heart. “ok, aniya aniya, I’m not sleepy anymore, pull over right here, I’ll drive,” he was shaking his index finger in the air. His signature ‘no no’ gesture.

            “Oh my, Kibum-ssi, no no,” I shook my index finger too, not taking my eyes off the road. “Trust me, I’ll get you home safe, do not worry, Key-ssi!” I said politely. He sighed.

            “Araso, but can you please sloooow down, Miss,” he replied. I pressed down on the brake slowly and did as he instructed. Some emotional song played and it felt like the moment to ask him about the article. Or should I just let him sleep?

            “Are you gonna sleep?” I asked him.

            “No no, you don’t know the directions, we could end up in Gwangju or Ulsan or something,” he said in English.

            “Araso…” we were quiet for a few minutes. Is now the time? I’m scared of what might be true… “Uh-mm, err… Kibum-ssi?” I said.

            “Mmm?” he said, his head was against the window with his eyes closed.

            “Sleeping?” I asked.

            “No, I just have my eyes closed, wae?” he asked, with a sweet voice.

            “Aniya, uh just- uh, that… ah! I think you should look up your name on the web and see if anything popped up from today,” okay, that was smooth.

            “Oh, good idea!” he said cheerfully as he sat up straight and pulled out his phone from his pocket. I inhaled deeply and exhaled loudly, then there was silence for a minute of two.

            “Kim Kibum, it’s okay… I, uh- already saw it,” I said with a serious voice.    

            “Aniya, it’s not what you think, seriously, I’m not kidding, it’s, uh, ottoke, how do I explain this,” he looked for words and I waited. “Okay, we did talk about it, that’s the truth,”

I forced back my feelings and let him talk. It was true, then? “Because we, got a lot of requests from fans to be part of it…err, together,” he scratched his head, without turning away from me. “the producers from the show contacted our managers,” I couldn’t look at him because I didn’t want to feel worse about it. It was his job to be a celebrity, it was normal.

            “So…was anything signed? Or something?” I said. This was my instincts acting up. If their contract was formed, everything was agreed upon, there won’t be much I can do about it. Having studied general law, it was all that was on my mind. He shook his hands in the air and shook his head at the same time.

            “Nothing like that, we all met up there at the broadcasting station to talk about it, but there were other complications…Like, I was already on the Global WGM… It was strange to be on it again…Also, I kind of refused too…” he slowly said.

            “Eh? Wae?” I asked.

            “Well, this happened in the time we weren’t talking. But I was already interested in…Ms. Ellie, so it didn’t feel right to just do that out of nowhere. Thinking about you reading about it abroad, when we haven’t been talking, just felt wrong and rude,” he explained in half-English, half-Korean, just in case I couldn’t understand a bit.

            “Oh really?” I said. I was speechless after his explanation. What was I supposed to say? Here he was, being as sweet as anyone could be, but it didn’t feel great.

            “You refused work partly because of…me?” I said and I suddenly sped without thinking. He didn’t say anything though, so I kept going.

            “Are you offended?” he asked, flabbergasted.

            “A little,” I replied. I was glad we could talk about it calmly, without arguing and without blaming anybody.

            “Wae? I just told you something romantic!” now, he sounded offended.

            “Aniya, it was very nice of you to do that and very considerate… But, that was work, it’s just like acting, also it was basically fan service. You were giving something your fans wanted, they’ll be disappointed, reading that article that released today,” I was using my hands as I talked.

            “Ellie-ah… You need to learn to think about yourself first,” he sighed. “If our relationship was surrounded with worrying about the fans and our jobs, what would become of us? We wouldn’t be happy, don’t get me wrong, I’m more than grateful for my fans, for my job, but…it shouldn’t hinder any of us, including the members, from being happy,” he said, his voice doused in honey.

            “That’s work though, if it was an acting part in a drama and you had to do sweet stuff and you know…other stuff with a woman, you need to take that because that’s your job,” I explained myself. I didn’t want to back down from this argument, but we were both people who wanted to be right all the time.

            “Ellie-ah, it is my job, but WGM is a show that brings together two people and makes them pretend to be married, there are people who actually dated and got married because of that show… It’s not like it’s just a drama and I have to act. It’s a show where you actually have to display your feelings. I won’t be playing a character, I’d be me, SHINee’s Key, myself,” he was so serious. With his last sentence, I was convinced that he was right. I already read the comments from the article. There were some, not a lot, but some that said, ‘see? I told you, that girl was just his side!’ and other things like that. Fans were upset. “What do you think?” he asked.

            “Mmm…” I furrowed my brows as I thought about what he said.

            “Please stop worrying about the fans… Worry about yourself. Caring for others first is my favourite strength about you, but it’s also your weakness…” he said quietly. “I’m sorry this all had to come up and I’m sorry for not telling you in advance about it, you should’ve heard it from me and not some article and for that, I don’t know what else to say, except that I’m sorry,” he sincerely said.

            “Araso,” was all I said. I didn’t want to have another emotional moment. Also, I wasn’t angry. I was disappointed that he didn’t tell me right away, but it was something that happened already and he probably knew that if he told me he would be creating an issue that did not even exist in the first place.

            “Are we okay?” he asked, shifting in his uncomfortable position because he was still facing me.

            “We’re okay,” I gave him a smile. “Sit right, you’re making me nervous,” I said and pushed his knee off his seat. I could see his big smile from the corner of my eye.

            “You know, you’re pretty mature for your age,” he said smugly. “Sometimes, I forget that we’re five years apart,” he added, tilting his head side to side.

            “Good good,” I said, trying to figure out the road signs. “Do I stay on this lane?” I asked.

            “Yep yep,” he said, yawning. That was the last thing he said before all I could hear was heavy breathing. I had to pull out my phone and use Google Maps because I didn’t want to wake him up.

Krrrriiiing. Krrrriiiiiing.

Oh shoot! That’s so loud! Did I wake him? I looked over to him, but his scarf was wrapped around his head covering his ears, so he didn’t move an inch.

            “Yeoboseyoooong?” I said, in a cute, annoying voice. Called ID said it was Kris.

            “Yah yah yah! Are you okay?! I read the article!?! Jinki and the members had no idea either! They were just at the dorm, spending time together with your boyfriend’s dogs, them BAM! They saw the articles online and Oppa messaged me! What happened?! Did you guys fight?!” she was so loud that I had to lower the volume of the stereo.

            “Aigoo, you guys were worrying for nothing, we’re okay, we talked about it, he explained it,” I said quietly.

            “Oh really? So, is it true? Is he going on it? Are you okay with that??” she asked frantically. I chuckled lightly at her worried voice.

            “No, he’s not going on it, the producers of the show wanted it, but there were some issues and he’s not gonna be there,” I explained. She sighed so loudly that I got scared.

            “Oh thank God! I know that you were rooting for EunJi and him after Taemin’s WGM but, I couldn’t believe it actually happened!” I wanted to hang up the phone call when she said that.

            “Yah! I’m in the car with Key, shut up,” I whispered loudly. I didn’t want Key to know I was rooting for them, what will that do to my pride, jeez, Kris!

            “Oh, hahahaha!” she laughed.

            “Yeah, is that it?” I asked, with no emotion in my voice.

            “Aniya, guess what guess what guess what!” she asked, excitedly.

            “What?” I replied with the opposite emotion.

            “I’m coming to you!!!!!!!!!” she yelled so loud that lowering the volume was no use.

            “WHAT!?!?!?!?!?! Chingu-yah!!!! Oh my Lord! Are you serious?!” I yelled and this was when Kibum jumped in his seat.

            “Wae! Wae!  Wae!” He said, with panic in his voice. He spread is arms, holding on to whatever he could.

            “Aniya, we’re good,” I waved him off. “Keep sleeping,” I pushed his head back down against the window.

            “How the heck do you expect me to sleep now, pabo,” he replied, taking my hand of his head.

            “Oops!” Kris said.

            “Omo!!” Kibum reacted, looking behind his seat. I laughed so hard that my eyes started to tear up.

            “Aniya! Kris is on the phone,” I was still laughing. “Who are you calling pabo, aigoo, hahahaha!”

            “Oh, annyeong Kris,” he said nonchalantly, like nothing happened. How cute. “Omo, yah! Exit here, here, here, here!” he pointed to the highway exit. I swerved the car because if I didn’t, we would have missed the exit.

            “Kris! I’ll call you back later, I’m on Google Maps right now and driving so I kinda need to know where I’m going,” I said, slowing the car down as we exited the highway.

            “Oh okay okay, don’t tell Oppa though! I want to surprise him,” she replied. “Talk to you later, love ya!” she made a kissing sound and hung up.

            “Kibummie, are you awake now?” I sang.

            “Kibummie?? What am I? Your dog? We’re still talking formally, So Ra-ssi,” he made a ‘hmph’ sound and crossed him arms.

            “Whatever, I’m so excited for Kris coming here!” I squealed.

            “Oh my God,” he said in English after minutes passing of him looking through his phone. I glanced over at him and he was covering his mouth as he stared at his phone.

            “What, what, what now???” I said, irritated at whatever he was looking at already. What kind of news is this now? More articles on We Got Married? More bad comments? When will we ever get a break from these things? “Yah, what is it??” I complained because he still wasn’t talking.