“Well, that’s not really surprising” he said, lips tugging slightly. “Don’t be so stressed” he ran his hand between his hairs. “We were friend at all”

“We are soulmate, now.” I said, didn’t really know how to react.

“Just because a damn label, don’t limit your feelings just for me, don’t try to love me just because you have to.” He said like it was not a big deal. “It’s not a big deal” he said, as he read my mind.

“But it is how it works! We supposed to be mad in love with each other!” I was nearly yelling, frustrated.

“Nah, we don’t. “ He brought his face closer to me.

“Our family, the society would expect us to be dating, and married.” I whispered.

“Let’s married then, let’s pretend we contented with each other. After that we move to Seoul, as we planned before, as we planned when we were friends. After we move, you could go freely to anyone, loving somebody else.” He was back to his seat, drinking his caramel macchiato.

“Why you want us to do that? You’ve anyone else in mind?” I tried to read his face, but I failed.

“Yes.”

.

.

When we were childhood, our parents always wonder who would be our soulmate. When the label on our wrist appeared, they were more than happy, to knew we fated to each other.

“It must be a gift from God!” my mother told me excitedly.

It’s not mom.

Some people may though destined to your own bestfriend is a freaking amazing. Like either of you already so used to each other or know everything about each other.

But it annoys me even more.

Hoseok never do anything wrong, never makes me mad, he knows everything about me inside out.

We never fight.

So when he told me that I could freely go out to anyone, he knew I wouldn’t say no.

So I’m here, with lots of breathtaking y girls around me. Knowing hoseok would be at home, reading some of his materials for his morning lecture.

And in the next morning I would wake up because of smell of hangover soup –maybe pho, sometimes miso, everything with sound of closed door.

.

.

My days are going almost the same, everyday. Sometimes Hoseok cooks, sometimes I am. Making music, go to company, drunk in the midnight, and wake up with smell of chicken broth.

I almost forget when the last time I see Hoseok.

We practically living in the same house, but when I wake up in the morning, he already left. When I cook for lunch and left to the company, he came home. When I back from company in the evening, he already left to teach in a language center nearby. When he coming back in midnight, I already in the club.

I hang out too much.

The first intention of my midnight hangout is to find hoseok’s another person. Like I really thought I would find something, maybe hoseok would hangout after his part time job in language center.

But hoseok always come straight to home, he always text me if I want him to wait for me or not.

I said no.

I try to looking in our house for some clue about that person, who makes hoseok want this ridiculous plan to pretend to be married and .

I never found out.

.

.

Today, I choose to stay at home. Although the weather is nice, but I don’t know why I feel maybe tonight would be different. I try to understand some bad jokes on tv when hoseok is coming home.

“You’re here?” he looks a lil bit surprised.

“yeah”

“Already eat?”

“No.”

Hoseok left the living room, and change to comfortable clothes.

“What do you want to eat? I just have some soup ingredients, because I thought you’ll be hangover tomorrow morning.” Hoseok going straight to kitchen, without even took a glance on me.

“Let’s have soup then.” I see Hoseok cooks, with an oversized t-shirt and all. He looks a lil bit too comfortable for his own good.

“Smells good” I give him a back hug, he feels so stiff under my fingertips.

“Are you drunk?”

“No.” I sniff slightly in his nose, he smells like vanilla.

“I love you.” I mumble behind his back, I don’t really thought about it. I feel tired, and overwhelmed. I wait to Hoseok to scoff me, or anything.

But he never does.

“Love you too then, Yoongi.”

“You never do.”

“I do”, he turn back to face me.

“How about that another person, in your mind” I want to yell, I want to throw my anger at him, but it is all come out as a whisper.

“You never asked me who is he.” His lips form a small smile.

“I am falling love with my bestfriend, not with my soulmate, Yoongi. For such a long time”

“but I don’t wanna my bestfriend loves me just because he should do that. I want him to loves me because he want too.”

“So I wait… maybe he would love me the same.” Hoseok nearly cry.

And all I could do is just kiss him, because I don’t know the other way round to tell him,

.

.

I love him so much more.