Next year, Hongbin told his parents and Leo that he couldn’t come home. He said that the company was needed him, and he was so busy, also he had to save up his money. He refused to use his parents’s money since he moved to New York. That was the reason why he only came home once a year.

Leo was sad hearing Hongbin couldn’t come home this year. He had hoped that he could meet Hongbin soon, but he got that bad news. He frowned, stressed. He was the head of surgeon now in the hospital. It made him more busy and busy and busy everytime. he had apologized to Hongbin everytime he late replying Hongbin’s chat. Hongbin understood him, he never angry to him. they both supported each other, and cheered up for each other.

One day, Leo got a good news for Hongbin. he couldn’t wait to hear Hongbin’s squealed. It was 6 pm in Seoul, that meant, it was like 4 am in New York. So Leo sat on his office table and made a video call to Hongbin. he fixed his hair neatly while waiting  for Hongbin to accept the call.

“Hmm? I’m sleeping” Leo looked at his screen, all he saw was only the ceiling. He chuckled hearing Hongbin’s hoarse voice.

“Sorry, but I suppose you want to hear this good news”

“Hmm”

Leo chuckled again, and this time Hongbin flicked his tongue in annoyance, “I swear, if you make a prank to me, i’m going to kick your flat ”

“My is not flat! It’s a bit plump you know!” he said as he stood up and showed his almost plump .

“Bye”

“NO WAIT!” Leo screamed and sighed in relief as Hongbin didn’t end the call.

“Let me see your face first”

“mmno, i’m ugly”

“i don’t care, come on Bin”

There was a rustling sound and the screen was full with Hongbin’s sleepy face. “happy?” said Hongbin as he rubbed his sleepy eyes.

“I’m sorry for waking you up this early. Listen to me, okay. I. Am. Going. To. NEWYORK!”

“hmm”

Leo stared in disbelief, did Hongbin just … didn’t care?

Hongbin’s eyes suddenly popped open and a big smile appeared on his face. then Leo had to take his phone away from his ear, Hongbin just screamed loudly and he heard a creak sound from his bed maybe. He saw the screen was moving up and down, probably Hongbin was jumping on his bed.

This kid

“Yah! Yah! You’re going to wake your neighbor! and you’re going to have a new bed!” Hongbin immediately stop and sat down on his bed. Leo only saw Hongbin’s plain tshirt. Then he saw Hongbin smiling widely to him.

“Are you serious?”

“Yes, but. It’s for work”

“No problem! When?”

“next month!”

“I can’t wait”

“Me too”

The day that they had been waiting had arrived, it was Friday evening. Hongbin waited for Leo in the airport. It was cold, he waved and shouted Leo’ s name when he spotted Leo in the crowd.  Their eyes met, and both running towards each other. And hugged.

“Oh! You only bring a suitcase?”

“Yeah, I told you, it’s just three days” Hongbin put a big smile although he felt sad that Leo only stayed for three days.

“It’s fine, we’re gonna make it worth”

So that night, Hongbin took leo to his favorite restaurant and they had dinner together. And Hongbin also brought him to the hotel. Luckily, his hotel wasn’t too far from his apartment.

“So, when do you have a time to go out?”

“Tomorrow evening, and Sunday. You?”

“SAME! THAT’S GREAT!!!”

Leo smiled widely, and now they had to bid goodbye again. but he was glad that they would meet again tomorrow.

“So, goodnight ahjussi”

“Be careful Bin. And good night too”

Hongbin was waiting at the lobby, Leo had told him to meet him in the lobby. So here he was, standing and waiting and kept looking towards the lift. He saw Leo stepped out, wearing a blue and pink sweater. Hongbin grinned widely as he looked down to his pink sweater. Leo approached him with a big smile, he gestured to his sweater.

“We are a pink couple today” said Leo with a smirk on his face, he saw the blush crept on Hongbin’s cheeks.

“Umm, yeah. Umm, so? What do you want to do? It’s getting dark, and it’s Saturday niiiiight”

“How about you are my tour guide ? I’d like to know the places that you most visit in here”

Hongbin took Leo to the photography gallery, to the book store, and to the coffee café at last. It was almost midnight that they walked back to Leo’s hotel. They walked in silence, with a hot latte in their hands.

“where do you live?”

“Oh! Why? Do you want to come to my apartment? And watch some movies with me? or we can make a popcorn? Or pasta? But i forgot to buy some groceries. When do you want to go to my apartment? Tomorrow?”  Hongbin looked at him with his big doe eyes while sipping his latte.

Leo chuckled and shook his head hearing Hongbin talked so fast like that. “I’d love to if you invite me tonight”

Hongbin almost choked, he squealed and jumped excitedly and pulled Leo’s hand to follow him to the nearest supermarket. He bought some snacks, the pasta ingredients, and drinks. He almost running on his way to his apartment with Leo behind him. he couldn’t wait to watch a movie with Leo like they used to when they were still in high school.

When they arrived, they made the pasta together and ate together and then watched the movie together, snuggled on the couch with a warm blanket spread over their body, Hongbin’s head rested on Leo’s chest while Leo’s chin on Hongbin’s head. They even fell asleep like that. And when the morning came, Leo made a breakfast for them. it was an omelet, Hongbin’s favorite since he was child. They talked about everything, teased on one another, and they just spent the day in the apartment, taking pictures together. Until it was time for Leo to leave, he had a flight tomorrow morning so he had to go back to the hotel that night.

“I’m sorry, I had an appointment tomorrow. I don’t think i can make it to the airport with you” Hongbin murmured while playing with his own fingers, unable to meet Leo in the eyes. He just felt guilty, Leo always had a time to see him in their last minute, but he couldn’t do the same for Leo.

Leo lifted his chin gently and smiled, “It’s fine Bin-ah, I’m already happy just spending two days with you. and now I have to wait for another year to see you”

Hongbin smiled apologetically. They bid their goodbyes and promised to see each other again in the next year.

--- NEXT YEAR

Hongbin wanted to make a surprise to leo. He wanted to show up in front of Leo’s house on Leo’s birthday. He also bought a gift for him.

He just landed on Korea on 10 am, he went straight to his house, and spent the day with them. he still hadn’t told Leo about him in Korea. He will go to Leo’s house tomorrow night, because Leo’s birthday is tomorrow. He pretended that he forgot about Leo’s birthday, he even didn’t reply any of Leo’s chat. He held his laugh everytime he imagining Leo’s grumpy face.

Day turned into a night, Hongbin dressed nicely and put his new perfume around his body. He knew he was being ridiculous, he didn’t know why. But he felt giddy to meet Leo soon. Maybe he missed Leo so much.

He was in front of Leo’s house and he rang the bell. Mrs Jung opened the door and smiled warmly at him.

“Oh Hongbin! I thought you’re in New York! I’m happy to see you!!”

Hongbin put his index finger on his mouth, gesturing her to keep quiet. “Is Leo at home?”

She frowned a little, “Aww, honey i’m sorry. But he seemed so busy in the hospital, you know he is the head of surgeon now and he barely at home honey.”

Hongbin’s smile fell, but he tried his best to keep smiling to her, “Oh.. that’s okay. Umm, I’m sorry for bothering you Mrs Jung.” He bowed to her and ready to leave. She called him and said, “Bin-ah, why don’t you leave a message for him? i can deliver it for you.” Hongbin shook his head, he told her that he would wait in the hospital instead. So Hongbin went to the hospital that night, he asked the information center where Leo’s office was, they made an appointment for him to meet Leo and then he walked towards Leo’s office. He sat on a bench near Leo’s office. They told him that Leo was still busy in an operation room, and they told him to wait for like 2 hours. Hongbin sighed, he looked at his watch, it was already 10 pm. That meant, Leo’s birthday would end soon. He regretted it, he should just tell Leo that he came back, but he just wanted to see Leo’s surprised face. he smiled when he thought about it. No! he didn’t regret it. He would just wait patiently then. Time ticked by, he suddenly felt thirsty. It was 11 pm, an hour left till he met Leo. He decided to go to the cafeteria to buy two coffee, one for him and the other for Leo. As he waited his order, he sat on the chair near a group of doctors who were gossiping something.

“Hey, do you know that Dr. Jung already had a girlfriend?”

A brown haired doctor almost choked on her drinks, “what! Who? Who’s the lucky girl!” the other also seemed excited to hear it.

Hongbin accidently caught what they just said, he tried to focus hearing their hushed voice. His heart beat faster as he also waited for the answer.

“I don’t know, but I heard that she is a daughter of Dr. Kim. You know that Dr. Kim and Dr. Jung are so close right? Dr. Kim is like a father to Dr. Jung. I heard that she is so pretty and smart. I heard that she is also a doctor, but still taking her surgery degree. So she often with Dr. Jung, that’s all I heard from my friends.”

“Are you sure? Because, Dr. Jung is kind of shy towards girls”

“Yeah, i guess your friends misinterpreted them as a couple.”

“I don’t know. But I’ve seen them twice! Holding hands towards Dr. Jung’s car.”

“Ooooooooo… I think they might be something then”

Hongbin realized he clenched his hands tightly, his body trembling so much, his tears threatened to pouring out. He even didn’t realize that his orders already done. He quickly got up, almost making his chair fell and went to pay his orders. He took the coffees and went to the information centre.

“Uh, sir? Can you do a favor for me?”

The information guy nodded and smiled, Hongbin gave him Leo’s gift and the coffee.

“can you please give this to Dr. Jung Leo? thanks” and he also handed him some tips and quickly ran away.

Hongbin didn’t bother to call a cab, he kept running on the street with his already damp cheeks. Until he was out of breath, he bent down trying to catch his breath. It was hard, since he was crying hard. He leaned on the wall beside him and crying.

‘Stupid! Stupid! Why should I cry! That’s good right? You should be happy! Leo finally had a girlfriend! You should be happy for him you idiot!’ he held his chest, it felt hurt.he wondered why it hurt. It was strange for him, he never felt this way before, he never felt jealous before. Was he really jealous towards Leo? It couldn’t be.

Hongbin shook his head from those stupid thoughts. He wiped his tears, calmed himself down, and walked back to his house with slumped shoulders.

Hongbin decided to go back to New York early. So he booked a ticket for tomorrow flight, and after that he went to the café, his and Leo’s usual café. It was empty that night. Hongbin had spent his days since that night at home. He barely ate and refused to talk to his parents, he barely smiled too. his hot latte still untouched in front of him, he only stared blankly to the front.

Leo just got off from hospital, he was so tired. It was such a hectic day in the hospital. Maybe a hot latte would make him more relax. He noticed the café was quiet empty, he ordered his usual latte and went to his usual spot too. he stopped on his track.

“Hongbin?” he smiled and walked towards him. he put his cup down on the table and pulled the chair in front of him with a loud screeching sound. He smiled widely in front of Hongbin. but he noticed that Hongbin still hadn’t blink or moved. He frowned, and then waved his hand in front of Hongbin’s face.

“Earth to Hongbin!!”

Hongbin snapped up from his thoughts, he saw Leo sat in front of him. and surprised.

“L-leo?”

Leo grinned from ear to ear, “Why don’t you tell me you’re here? You even forgot about my birthday? And where have you been! You didn’t reply any of my chats!” Leo was sulking and sipped his latte. Hongbin sighed, “sorry, I was so busy with.. works. And i only has a short trip in here. I will leave tomorrow.” He also sipped his latte and his eyes wandered somewhere else.

“At least you can tell me, I can make it for you”

“No hyung. I don’t want to bother you”

Leo frowned, he and Hongbin only had a year of . And it was a really long time ago the last time he heard Hongbin called him hyung. he wondered why and he also noticed that Hongbin seemed uncomfortable.

“Bin-ah? Is there something bothering your mind?”

“I just tired hyung.” he still hadn’t met him in the eyes. He looked at his watch and quickly got up. “I think I have to go hyung. i have to sleep early.”

Leo quickly grabbed his wrist, “Let me take you home”. Hongbin nodded with his head hung low.

It was a really awkward ride for both them. normally, Hongbin would sing or rambling something. But this time, Hongbin kept looking at his window, and silent. When they arrived, Hongbin only mumbled thanks to him and ready to leave. It was Leo who stopped him, Leo held his wrist again.

“Talk to me Bin. What’s wrong?”

“I-I really have to go now hyung, i’m sleepy.” Hongbin tried to pry his wrist away from his tight grip.

“I know something happened to you! i can feel it too!”

Hongbin snorted, “You can feel it? What do you mean! You’re talking nonsense” he mocked him and threw the back of his head to the headrest, he gave up on trying to get away from Leo’s grip.

Leo still frowned looking at him, he knew that something was up to Hongbin. Hongbin never ignored him before. “Hongbin-ah, look at me”

Hongbin glanced at him with uninterested look, he faked a yawn. “What?”

“Did I do something wrong? Are you mad at me?”

Hongbin only silent, he let a bitter laugh, “I don’t understand what you mean! Of course not! You pabo hyung! I’m just tired, sorry for ignoring you.”

Leo didn’t trust him, he could easily read Hongbin’s expression. He knew that Hongbin was faking it.

“Bin-ah? I’m your hyung, your best friend.”

‘I’m your hyung, your best friend.’ Hongbin kept replying it in his mind, of course, Leo only wanted him only as a best friend. Hongbin held back his tears as it threatened to fall, his chest ached so much. Hongbin still didn’t know why he got hurt when Leo said that. He was confused with his own feelings. Leo said that they were best friends, only best friends.

“I should go” Hongbin said with a hoarse voice, he pulled his hand away from Leo and opened the door to leave. But Leo saw a tear was running down on Hongbin’s cheek before he left. His heart hurt seeing Hongbin like that, he wondered what making Hongbin like that. Did he hurt him? did he did something that made Hongbin hurt? He kept watching Hongbin’s back till Hongbin entered his house and slammed the door behind him. he scrolled down last of their conversation. It all looked fine. He made an alarm for tomorrow so he could see Hongbin at the airport at least.

But Leo was late. He ran faster to the check-in room. He saw Hongbin’s parents there and greeted them. they felt sorry for Leo, because Hongbin’s plane just took off. Leo’s face fell. He mumbled thanks to them and walked back to his car. he shut his door and groaned. He pulled out his phone and typed something to Hongbin. Suddenly, Jaehwan’s name popped up on his screen, signaling it was a call from Jaehwan. He groaned, but he picked it up.

“Leo-ssi? Where are you! come to the hospital faster, we need you in 10 mins. Now!” and the call ended. Leo groaned again, loudly this time. He forgot to chat Hongbin, and drove away to the hospital.

---Next year

Hongbin and Leo still chatted and made a video call, but not so often as last year. Their conversation were only asking each other’s doings, and there were no more playful chats between them. Hongbin didn’t want to meet Leo this year, so he told his parents and Leo that he couldn’t come home. Hongbin was also busy in the company, luckily he met someone too. his name was Ravi, he worked as a composer. They met in a café. It was Ravi who accidently spilled his coffee on Hongbin’s shirt, since then they became friends and hang out together. But Hongbin had warned Ravi that there won’t be any feelings between them, Ravi agreed.

It was cold night, Hongbin and Ravi just got out from their usual night club. They just danced, laughed, and drunk. they walked towards Hongbin’s apartment with hand in hand. Ravi told him a joke and they cracked a laugh on their entire walk.

“Do you want to spend a night with me?” said Hongbin with a lured voice, his fingers tickling Ravi’s collarbone and down to reveal his chest. Ravi saw something on behind Hongbin who was looking at them with a curious expression. He held Hongbin’s finger and shook his head, “Not tonight Bin, I think you have a guest tonight” he pointed to behind Hongbin and mouthed “Leo” to him. Ravi knew about Leo, Hongbin had told him about Leo and showed him his picture. Ravi also knew that Hongbin had a feelings towards Leo, but he never said that out loud to Hongbin. because Hongbin was a little stubborn, Hongbin said that he didn’t care if Leo had a girlfriend or not, but Ravi knew that Hongbin cared, Hongbin was jealous, Hongbin was in love with Leo. He wanted Hongbin to confess his feelings towards Leo.

Hongbin was shocked, they weren’t too drunk that night so he could clearly knew what Ravi meant. He still facing Ravi, Ravi spun him around to facing his apartment, more precisely facing Leo. Leo stood in front of them, with a sour expression towards Ravi.

“You must be Leo right? Hongbin talked a lot about you! I’m Ravi, his friend here” Ravi offered his hand to Leo and they shook their hands gently. Ravi smiled, “I guess, I’m going home now. nice to meet you Leo. Bye, bye Bin” Ravi jogged away.

Hongbin still had his eyes on Leo with his mouth hung open, eyes still unblinking on Leo. Leo took a step closer.

“L-leo hyung? what are you doing here?”

Leo raised his eyebrow, “What? You’re not happy if I come here?”

Hongbin shook his head, “No. I-i mean, of-of course i’m happy”

Leo sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. “I’ve waiting for you here for almost two hours, and i’m cold. Now what? You’re not inviting me to your apartment? I also planning on staying in your apartment for two days, may i?” Leo waited for Hongbin’s answer, but Hongbin still gaped at him.

“Do you… not happy to see me?” He expected Hongbin’s answer again this time.

“I uh… what are you doing here? Aren’t you busy?”

“I take a short holiday for you”

Hongbin wanted to push him away but he saw Leo smiled down to him. “I’ve missed you Bin-ah” and hugged him. Hongbin was still stunned at that moment.

“It’s cold Bin. You’re cold” Leo rubbed Hongbin’s shoulders to warm him up. Hongbin let a faint “let’s go” and they went inside the apartment. They went to the lift together with Leo’s small suitcase. Hongbin was shaking to press the button, while Leo looked so happy behind Hongbin. They walked silently towards Hongbin’s apartment, Hongbin entered the password and invited Leo inside. Leo didn’t know which room he will stay. He expected that he would be in the same room with Hongbin again this time. But it seemed it won’t happen, Hongbin was preparing his guest room for Leo.

“Hyung? your room is ready. You can make a coffee or something you like in the kitchen. Just do whatever you want here, okay? I gotta go to bed. Night hyung” then hongbin left. Leo watched Hongbin closed his bedroom. hongbin still acted strange towards him, he thought if he went to surprise him in New York, Hongbin would be back teasing him like those old days. He walked toward his room and closed the door gently, he already thinking about what he should do to make the old Hongbin back.

The next day, Leo was making them a breakfast. He also had placed a glass of milk for Hongbin and a coffee for him on the table. Not long after that, Hongbin walked out from his bedroom, already dressed nicely. He guessed that Hongbin would go to work.

“I make us breakfast” he called so hongbin looked up to him.

“I can’t hyung, I’m late. Bye hyung, see you tonight” said Hongbin quickly as he walked faster towards the door. Leo sighed as Hongbin closed the door, he sat on the chair and stared gloomily at the table.

Things were still awkward when Hongbin came home late, he walked tipsy through the dark room. He even kicked something on his way towards his bedroom. it made Leo woke up, he was on the sofa in the living room. He saw Hongbin walking tipsy and rushed to his side. He helped Hongbin to his bed, took off his shoes, his jacket. He brushed Hongbin’s hair with his hand gently as he stared down.

“Are you always drunk in New York?”

Hongbin had his eyes closed and mumbled something that Leo didn’t understand. He waited until Hongbin snored softly. he got up and ready to leave, but he felt Hongbin tugged his hand down.

“stay”

So Leo crawled behind Hongbin and wrapped his arm around Hongbin.

The next day, it was Sunday luckily. Leo was there when Hongbin had his hangover. He made a soup for Hongbin and treated him well. Sadly, Hongbin still talked formally to him. and it almost night, Leo had his flight on midnight. Which it meant, he only had 2 hours before the cab arrived. Hongbin was still asleep, Hongbin kept sleeping all day. Leo had packed his things and already dressed nicely. His suitcase was already near the door. time ticked by, it was an hour left, Hongbin was still asleep. Leo didn’t want to wake him up, he knew that Hongbin was tired but… he had to leave in about an hour. He wanted to talk to Hongbin, so he woke him up gently.

“Hongbin-ah… I want to talk to you”

Hongbin groaned, but he awoke and sat on the bed. He rubbed his sleepy eyes, “what hyung”

Leo was playing with his fingers, he wanted to say something to Hongbin. He debated himself, should he say it now … or never.

“I have something to tell you”

“Hmm”

“Do you want to go home with me?”

“I can’t. i have work here too hyung”

“Oh”

Silence

They both stared down

Until it was Leo’s phone rang, “Hello? Oh yes, I’ll be down in a bit, thanks”

“It’s .. it’s the cab, he’s here” said Leo with a sad tone.

“Oh, bye hyung. have a safe flight”

Leo nodded, he slowly got up and walked out. Hongbin suddenly spoke, “wait!” Leo was smiling and turned around to see Hongbin got up from the bed.

“Let me walk you to the door”

Leo nodded and waited for Hongbin to walk towards him. they walked in silence, and Leo opened the door with his suitcase on his left hand. Leo turned around facing him, they stared one another.

“I guess, we will meet again in next year?”

“I…. I guess so.”

“Or I can visit you in the end of the year?”

“No! you’re busy…”

“I will do anything for you, I meant! I will do anything to go to see you”

 Hongbin smiled, he held his tears, and his aching chest.

“Shouldn’t you go now? the cab is waiting right?”

Leo looked at his watch, “it’s fine, just a bit late, its going to be alright”

Hongbin pushed him on the chest “go hyung”

Leo stunned, did Hongbin really want him to go? He heard Hongbin snorted, “You’ll be late, you told me you hate with that word!”

“Hongbin-ah, I want to tell you something important”

“You can tell me-“ Leo cut his words as he strode forward and cupped Hongbin’s face.

“I’m getting married!” he almost yelled, his breathing was hard, everything seemed quiet. Even Hongbin held his breath for a moment.

“I’m getting married!” he said that again, this time his voice was trembling a bit.

Hongbin’s mouth turned up and he let a shaky laugh, “Wow, that’s fast. I-… congrats hyung” he hugged Leo tightly, his chest hurt so much, it felt like his heart was squeezed hard.

“Are you.. happy? I’m… i’m getting married… “ leo whispered to his back.

“I am happy” Hongbin closed his eyes, he couldn’t contain himself, his tears fell down so quickly.

Leo didn’t expect this, he quickly leaned away and searching something in Hongbin’s eyes, he searched for the lies in hongbin’s eyes. “Hongbin-ah… tell me one more time, are you happy?”

“I am happy…I’m happy for you” but Hongbin’s eyes too blurry.

“Then why are you crying?”

“Because…. Ugh! It’s just.. i’m too happy, and this tears… i don’t know” Hongbin let a shaky laugh as he wiped his tears. Leo gulped down his saliva hard, his throat felt dry, he held back his tears. He thought that Hongbin loved him back. he had this feelings towards Hongbin since they entered the medical school.

“Hongbin-ah”

“I know it! you keep it as a secret from me huh? She is so lucky. She is the daughter of Dr. uh… what I don’t know”

“How do you know? Look Hongbin, I never-“

“Of course I know, it’s from… uhh.. friend. And i heard that she is beautiful, and smart, and must be your type, right?” Hongbin flashed him his dimple, even though the tears hadn’t stop pouring from Hongbin’s eyes.

Leo wiped the tears gently, “I never date her”

‘Liar’ said Hongbin in his thoughts.

“She is so annoying sometimes. Look! I… I never had a feeling towards her. It’s just, this doctor…. He is one of my senior and planning on marrying me with his daughter. I-“

“Hyung! it’s okay, you can try to love her later. I will come to your wedding. Congrats hyung!!”

Leo opened his mouth to say something and shook his head quickly, “Hongbin-ah, it’s not like what you think. I-“

“Hyung you should go! The cab is waiting! Go! Go!” Hongbin pushed him away, harder this time. Leo almost fell backwards, he watched Hongbin slammed the door. his eyes still on that closed door. the tears fell down on his cheeks. Hongbin didn’t love him, Hongbin never felt the same way as him.

Hongbin slumped down on the floor, crying, with his both legs bent towards his chest. He hugged his legs, rocked his body back and forth, telling himself that everything was alright. Leo was going to be married, he would be happy with his future wife. All he wanted was Leo to be happy. He thought that Leo had the same feelings as him, but he guessed that Leo only thought him as his best friend.

Hongbin heard a “ding” sound from outside, he stopped crying. He tried to hear Leo’s footsteps from the outside. He could imagine, Leo stepped in to the elevator. And the elevator door closed again.

Hongbin cried harder, he sobbed harder, he clutched his aching chest and punched his door harder. He was back on the floor, crying his eyes out.

Leo chewed on the inside of his mouth as he debated himself, his index finger was ghosting on that button. He closed his eyes, hoped that he didn’t make a mistake this time. He pushed the button hard and the door opened. He strode towards Hongbin’s door with his tears still falling on his cheeks. He knocked the door desperately. And in instant, the door opened widely, revealing Hongbin with his mess hair and red damp eyes.

Leo didn’t waste any time, he quickly dropped his suitcase and grabbed Hongbin’s head and kissed him hard. This was their first kiss. Leo had been wanting to kiss Hongbin, but he didn’t want things to go awkward, but this time, he didn’t want to regret it. at least, he confessed his feelings towards the younger, he didn’t care now if later Hongbin mad at him.

After several minutes went by, their kiss got sloppy and slowed and then Leo pulled away slowly.

“I love you Bin-ah” he said breathlessly, with Hongbin’s mouth still an inch before him. When Hongbin didn’t reply, he said those words again and again until Hongbin sealed his mouth shut with his soft lips, he nibbled softly on Leo’s lips.

“i love you too ahjussi”

Both men were smiling like an idiot, and then laughed.

“Can I stay for another night?”

“What about her?” Hongbin frowned. Leo kissed that pouty lip softly, “I told you I love you, isn’t that enough? Should I prove it to you? I never had a feeling toward her.” Hongbin grinned, and hugged Leo tightly.

So that night, Leo went to the cab, apologizing to the driver that he cancelled the cab and gave him some tips. Hongbin was behind him, grinning widely. Leo turned around and kissed him, “Let’s walk inside” and they went back to the apartment. This time, they slept together, with sharing some kisses, hugs, teases, pokes, and touches. Hongbin decided to take his day off tomorrow for Leo. They spent their time together, because in the night, Leo had to go back to Korea.

---

Things were back to normal, Hongbin and Leo kept replying one another’s chat. but this time, their conversation became more romantic. Leo had explained to Dr Kim that he and his daughter didn’t have any feelings, he also explained that he treated her nicely because she was like a sister to him. he apologized to him for declined the arranged marriage. Dr Kim understood, he just wished that Leo and Hongbin would marry soon. Also his daughter, she seemed okay with that, she only wanted to be friends with him and Hongbin soon.

It was already a year…

Hongbin held himself for jumping excitedly as he landed safely. This time, he stayed for a month. The company took a break, so Hongbin had a long holiday. Leo was waiting with Hongbin’s parents that night in the airport. Hongbin immediately hugged his parents first, then went to Leo. Leo stole a kiss from him that making him blushed. Leo took them to Hongbin’s house. Hongbin’s mother had prepared a dinner for them, including Leo’s parents. They gathered and having a barbeque party. Until suddenly, Leo took Hongbin’s hand and stood in front of their parents. Leo said those sweet words and looked at their parents eyes warmly. Then he knelt down in front of Hongbin and pulled out a ring box. He opened the box, and their moms gasped in unison. Hongbin gaped at him.

“Lee Hongbin, would you be my forever?”

Hongbin stared at those matching cute rings. Their moms “aww” together, making Hongbin blushed. Hongbin bit his lips, actually Leo didn’t have to say those words, Hongbin would always say “yes”. Hongbin pulled him up and pecked his lips as his arms wrapped around his neck.

“Yes, I want to be your forever”

So Leo took his hand and put the ring on Hongbin’s ring finger. Hongbin did the same. Their parents cheered for them, and soon they talked and planned what their wedding would be like. Leo got bored, he wanted to spend his time with Hongbin. so he stole Hongbin and guided him to Hongbin’s bedroom. they giggled and kissed and made love that night. that was a really wonderful night.

It had been a month already…

It was time for Hongbin to come back to New York. Their parents had set the date for them, their wedding would be on Hongbin’s birthday, which it was only 2 months left.

They all were at the airport, saying their goodbyes to hongbin. Hongbin hugged Leo for a long time, unable to pull himself away from Leo. He had his last call to go to the plane. Leo chuckled when Hongbin groaned.

“You can just quit, and stay here with me. or you shouldn’t be working, you’ll be the Mom”

“I know, I will send my resignation letter to the company. And then packed my things and come back here. “

“Do you want me to help you?”

“I can do by myself”

“Okaaay.. I will miss you” he kissed Hongbin again, longer this time. Hongbin hit his chest playfully, “I’ll be here in a week!”

It was time Hongbin for leave, because his name was being called again. both of them chuckled. Hongbin waved towards their family and Leo. He blew a kiss for Leo and Leo pretended caught it in his hands and saved it into his pocket. Hongbin laughed at Leo’s silliness.

Leo watched hongbin’s plane started to move, and a moment later it seemed ready to take off. Leo didn’t know why he felt something bad would happen. He had that bad feeling since this morning, he even begged Hongbin to cancel the flight.

It happened too fast. The plane lost its balance when it took off and crashed down immediately. Leo watched it with horror. He couldn’t move. He felt numb. He couldn’t hear other’s wailing. His mouth opened slightly, he felt his throat dry, his cheeks damped from his tears. He couldn’t scream, he couldn’t find his voice. He saw the ambulances and other helped the passengers. He didn’t know if they all dead or still alive. But his Hongbin was there, in that crashed plane. There were also fire brigades tried to kill the fire on the plane’s body. Leo felt the air in his lungs running empty, his legs trembled. There were so many people around him. he didn’t know who called his name. was it his father? Leo tried to control his breath, he breathed in and out. His phone rang, he couldn’t pull his phone out from his pocket, his hands were paralyzed. He didn’t know how long the incident had been. 5 minutes? 10 minutes? He couldn’t tell. It was his father, he handed the phone for him.

“Leo! Where are you! we need you, there’s a plane crashed just now and they took the victims here. They said they already on their way here. They brought 155 victims who are still unconscious and needed a surgery. Please come faster!!!” the call ended.

Leo still couldn’t move, it was his father who slapped him. “Hey! You heard that! You have to help them alive! I don’t know if it was Hongbin or not. But we’re pray for him. i hope he’s fine, i heard some of them were only had a bruise, some of them also.. d-dead, but they still investigate their identity. Now go back to your duty! Save them!”

Leo nodded, he finally came back to his senses. He drove away faster to the hospital. Went to the emergency departments, prepared himself, wore his surgery clothes and cleaned his hands and arms. The nurse were helping him too, they put him his mask. And he went to the surgery room with the nurses. He noticed that jaehwan already there waiting for him. he nodded his head to Jaehwan and they went to the surgery table. The victim had something pierced into his left abdomen, it ripped his colon since it was colon’s area. They needed to pull that thing from the victim’s body. Leo started to command the nurses and they did fast. Leo’s eyes wandered to the victim’s face. Leo almost dropped the instruments table, his nightmare happened. The victim was Hongbin, his Hongbin. Hongbin had his eyes closed, with some cuts on his face and neck. Leo couldn’t do this. Leo backed away immediately making the nurses and Jaehwan looked confused.

“Leo! What’s wrong?” Leo’s body already shaking so much, he leaned himself on the wall, looking so scared.

“I can’t… i c-can’t”

“Leo-ssi!”

“I CAN’T!!” Leo ran away, he pulled his surgery clothes and threw it. He couldn’t do that to Hongbin. he knew he was being ridiculous, he should helped Hongbin, not running away. He went back to his car and locked the door. he was so frustrated, his body still trembling so much, he couldn’t do that. He was too shocked.

It had been a week.

Hongbin already woke up, he was feeling better he said. His parents and Leo’s parents were there for him. Hongbin wasn’t allowed to move too much. Hongbin still hadn’t see Leo, he wanted to see Leo, he desperately wanted to see him. he knew that he was in Leo’s hospital, but why Leo hadn’t visited him. Leo’s parents also said that Leo hadn’t come home.

It was making Hongbin worried.

A week later.. still got no news from Leo.

Hongbin already in his house, he was sleeping that night. it was passed 10. Their door bell rang, Hongbin’s father opened the door with a tired eyes. But then he immediately smiled, he let Leo in and gestured him towards Hongbin’s room.

Leo slowly and carefully walked into hongbin’s room. He knelt on the floor, beside Hongbin and watched Hongbin silently. He was being stupid these days, he had been in his office when Hongbin was still in the hospital, he actually begged his parents to not telling Hongbin about where he was. he told his parents the truth about him couldn’t face Hongbin in the surgery room, that he had ran away. His father was so angry, saying that he was irresponsible of being a doctor. He knew that his father was right, and he hated it. he hated it why he couldn’t help Hongbin that day. He shouldn’t run away. And now he regretted it. he wanted to apologize to him. he had apologized to Hongbin’s parents too for not being responsible. Hongbin’s parents understood that Leo needed a time. He also got scolded from the head of hospital and Jaehwan and other doctors. He promised, next time he should be more controlled his emotions.

So here he was now, crying in Hongbin’s room. He was glad that Hongbin was still alive. He slowly lifted his trembling finger and caressed Hongbin’s face gently.

“I’m sorry…” he whispered those words. And he couldn’t help himself from crying again. he buried his face to the bed. He felt someone was knocking his head gently. He looked up, and saw Hongbin smiling at him.

“you pabo ahjussi!” said Hongbin with a hoarse voice.

Hongbin moved a little to give a space for leo. He told Leo to lay on the bed with him. so leo laid on the bed and facing him. he cried silently. Hongbin wiped those tears and whispering “i love you” to him. Hongbin forgave him, he kissed Leo softly, until they both fell asleep.