I'm terribly sorry that this update is so, so late. I have a bucketload of excuses but I'll leave those for after the chapter. Enjoy!

(Also I might have decided to change the tense for this story. I'm sorry. This sort of thing bothers me to no end, and here I am doing it. I just couldn't write this chapter in any other tense besides present. (I didn't even realize I was writing in present tense until I was halfway through lol). I'm sooooorry. Forgive me.)

(And I wrote (and edited) the entirety of this chapter in under 24 hours (while still going to school and all that ) so I apologize if it's kinda, totally terrible :)

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Yixing jolts awake and almost falls out of his chair when he's startled by the front door slamming open. Getting his bearings, he glances blearily at the clock and gathers that it is way too late at night (late enough for it to be considered morning) for ing doors to be slamming open and waking up the whole goddamn house.

It strikes him that maybe he should be worried. What if it's like... a robber or something? Or maybe a crazed fan–out to strangle them in their beds in the middle of the night?

But really he's just frustrated because he was in the middle of a really good dream. Something involving Baekhyun and those pretty fingers of his (and some whip cream)…

Shaking off the last traces of sleep, he realizes that there are some strange noises emanating from the front hallway. It sounds a bit like a cross between a drunk three-legged monster stumbling about and someone getting painfully choked between Natasha Romanoff's glorious thighs.

Not that he notices her thighs.

Okay, okay. Fine. But who isn't extremely slightly attracted to Scarlett Johansson?

And of course, thinking about thighs, ultimately leads him to fantasize about Baekhyun's perfect, delicious ones that he might or might not daydream about biting…

Coming out of his reverie, he finally realizes that the sounds of mortal pain and discomfort drifting down the hallway belong to familiar voices. Junmyeon hyung and Baekhyun's to be exact.

What the hell did they get themselves into this time?

Sighing, Yixing extracts himself from the uncomfortable position in which he had fallen asleep in on his chair and makes his way outside to face whatever catastrophe awaits him.

‘Drunk three-legged monster stumbling about’ hadn't been so off after all.

Baekhyun is intoxicated. He's filthy drunk. Yixing can tell just by looking at him. He's the type of intoxicated when people do crazy things like dressing up in chicken costumes and howling at the moon while eating honey straight from the jar with their hands―not that Yixing has any experience with that of course―and don't remember any of what they did or why they did it the next day.

And Junmyeon is there. Gallantly doing his best to extricate Baekhyun from around his neck and remove the younger's shoes at the same time. Looking up, he spots Yixing and a look of relief transforms his face and he sends out a silent cry for help.

"Yixing," he croaks, because currently Baekhyun's elbow is jabbing into his neck in such a way that it looks dangerously close to cutting off Junmyeon's air supply.  "Please―help me."

After suppressing a hysterical laugh that is bubbling up in his chest, Yixing rushes forward to the rescue and grabs a flailing-about-Baekhyun by the waist and struggles to pull him off Junmyeon.

"Nooooo. I want Yixing," Baekhyun moans.

Yixing sends a questioning look over the top of his head towards Junmyeon, who just shrugs as if to say don't ask me .

"C'mon baby, it's me. We have to get you out of those shoes and into bed," Yixing says.

Baekhyun immediately perks up and peeks out from where his face is hidden in Junmyeon's neck. He beams and giggles drunkenly, "Hyung? Hyung! I found you!" (Except that he's slurring so much it sounds more like hyunifounyou.)

Yixing grasps him firmly and steers him over to a chair in which Baekhyun plops down.

He reeks of alcohol.

"Yes. You found me."

"Be? Rberight? I onlwannasleepyerbe." (Bed? Your bed right? I only wanna sleep in your bed.)

Yixing sighs, "Yes. My bed. But I swear, if you throw up in it…"

He leans down to pull off Baekhyun's shoes and glances up at Junmyeon who's watching them with crossed arms. A strange look seems to pass over his face before Yixing beckons him over to help carry Baekhyun to his bedroom.

Baekhyun seems to be singing some song but it sounds like completely nonsense until Yixing realizes he's singing Lose Control—or trying to, anyway. In Chinese, no less. He doesn't know what to make of that.

"Looooose controoooool. Hyung you make me wanna loooose controoool."

Junmyeon tries unsuccessfully to cover up his laugh and Yixing shoots a glare at him before returning his attention to Baekhyun.

Once in the bedroom, Yixing let's go of Baekhyun for a moment to retrieve his pajamas and as soon he starts walking away, Baekhyun begins sloppily stripping off his clothes. All of them.

"Baekhyun! You can't―what―no!"

Junmyeon is being absolutely no help. He's just leaning against the wall and laughing like an idiot.

Yixing rushes back over with the pajamas in hand just as Baekhyun is about to remove his boxers.

"Baekhyun―no. Put these on."

Baekhyun spins around and almost falls over. Yixing has to put an arm out to steady him.

Baekhyun pouts, "No! I don't wanna!"

"You have to."

"I don't have to do anything!"

Yixing sighs, defeated, and runs a weary hand over his face.

Baekhyun just has to torture him, doesn't he?

"Fine. But at least keep your boxers on."

Baekhyun beams again and oh god―how is Yixing ever going to be able to resist that smile?

The younger boy throws himself into Yixing's arms. He staggers back with the force and almost falls over when Baekhyun plants a huge, sloppy kiss on his cheek. Except it's not really on his cheek. Baekhyun had been aiming for his cheek but in his drunkenness, it lands half on Yixing's mouth.

"Thank you, hyung! I love you, you know that?"

Yixing stares at him open-mouthed, in shock but Baekhyun doesn't even realize there is anything amiss.

Junmyeon notices though. Of course he does. He raises an eyebrow at Yixing's rising blush but doesn't comment.

He notices Baekhyuntugging insistently on his arm, trying to get his attention. Yixing turns back to him.

"Yixinggggg. Do you love me too?" Baekhyun whines.

Yixing's stomach clenches. This isn't right.

Baekhyun pouts that adorable pout of his again, "Tell me you love me, hyung. You love me, right?"

Yixing sighs and pushes down the painful feeling in his chest that is threatening to overflow, "Of course I love you Baekhyunnie. How could you even think otherwise?"

Out of the corner of his eye, he catches Junmyeon gazing at him sadly. He gives Yixing a grim smile.

Baekhyun giggles happily again and Yixing has to spend the next minute coercing him into bed.

He finally manages to get Baekhyun under the covers with promises of making him pancakes the next morning and a kiss to the forehead.

"Okay, now just lie here Baek. I'll be right back. I have to go talk to Junmyeon hyung."

"Don't leave me," Baekhyun whimpers softly.

It sends a pang through Yixing's heart.

"I promise, baby. I promise I'll be right back. I'm not going anywhere."

"You promise?"

"Yes. And just like you said―I always keep my promises," Yixing replies firmly and leaves the room with Junmyeon after pressing one last kiss to Baekhyun's forehead.

Shutting the door softly behind him, he rounds on Junmyeon the moment they are alone.

"What the hell happened?" Yixing whispers angrily. He'd managed to keep his composure this whole time but now they were out of earshot of Baekhyun. He needs to know what caused Baekhyun to feel the need to go and get drunk like this. What―or who―has hurt his Baekhyunnie?

Junmyeon holds his up hands in surrender and takes a step back, "Don't get mad at me. Honestly. I have no idea. I was literally just about to go to sleep when I got a call from him. To be honest, I think he dialed me by accident and wasn't even planning on coming home tonight. It was obvious at once that he went and got faced and was drunk as hell. With some coaxing, I got the name of the bar he was at, out of him, and went and dragged him away from like his fiftieth shot."

"If someone had seen him and recognized him, we could have all gotten in trouble. He―he could've gotten hurt! Anything could've happened to him and we―I―wouldn't be there to help him and―"

All the adrenaline drains out of Yixing in a rush and he slumps against the wall.

Junmyeon moves forward and puts a reassuring hand on his shoulder, "But he's okay, Yixing. He's fine. It's okay. He's not hurt."

He pulls Yixing into a comforting embrace and Yixing leans against him, comforting in his warmth.

Junmyeon murmurs into Yixing's hair, "Don't blame yourself. I know you're going to try to make this somehow your fault, but it's not. Don’t worry about what could’ve occurred. Nothing happened and he's home safe. Don't worry."

"But why? Why, hyung? Why did he go and get drunk? He's not irresponsible like this. He knows what could happen and that we can't afford to―it could ruin him. And he knows he's not good at holding his alcohol at all. So why?"

"I don't know, Yixing," Junmyeon replies with a hint of despair tinging his voice.

For the first time that evening, Yixing thinks about how Junmyeon must feel. He's the leader. He also has the same terrible habit as Yixing of taking responsibility for everything that happens. He places these huge burdens on himself. He blames himself.

"Hyung, it's not your fault either," Yixing tells him.

"I know. And don't you dare tell yourself that it's yours. Okay Yixing? I can't have you thinking things like that. I need you all to be happy and― Yixing―can't you see how much he loves you?"

Yixing pulls away from Junmyeon and studies his hyung's expression in surprise.

"Wh―what do you mean?" he asks, even though deep down, he knows exactly what Junmyeon is talking about.

"You know what I mean," is all Junmyeon says in reply. He has that same sad look on his face that he had in the bedroom. "I just want you both to be happy, okay?"

"Umm...?"

Junmyeon just sighs and shakes his head, "Anyway, he's going to have a hell of a hangover when he wakes up tomorrow. I know you'll take good care of him but make sure he doesn't throw up on the carpet, okay? We just got it replaced."

"Okay. Thank you, hyung. For making sure he got home safe," Yixing gives him a grateful smile.

Junmyeon looks at him wistfully when he replies, "I would do the same for any of you. You're my friends. My family. My brothers."

He claps Yixing encouragingly on the shoulder, "Good luck with Baekhyun." And with that he leaves Yixing by himself, pondering over the hidden meaning behind their conversation.

-

Yixing re-enters the bedroom to find Baekhyun sprawled on the bed with the covers thrown off. His eyes are closed and he seems to be breathing tranquilly.

He takes a moment to appreciate how peaceful Baekhyun looks in this moment. He also looks younger. Softer somehow. Innocent.

An urge to protect him, wells up in Yixing. He wishes he can shelter Baekhyun from the world but all of them have been through too much to ever go back to being what they once were. Now all they really have is each other.

Baekhyun stirs, "Are you coming to bed or are you just going to stand there all night appreciating my beauty?"

Yixing smiles, "That actually doesn't sound like such a bad idea."

Baekhyun chuckles and covers his eyes with his arm, "I'm still drunk but I can already feel the beginnings of a terrible headache."

"Serves you right for going and getting drunk like that. How much did you drink anyway?" Yixing asks as he slips into his pajamas.

"Trust me, you don't want to know."

"I thought you'd be asleep by now."

Baekhyun removes his hand from his eyes and looks at Yixing. "You and I both know that I can't sleep without you," he says matter-of-factly.

"You know, it's a relief to know I'm not the only one. I was beginning to think I had some sort of problem when I realized I just couldn't seem to fall asleep when you weren't there," Yixing replies.

"It probably is a problem. But it's a good one," Baekhyun smiles, the corners of his eyes crinkling up happily.

"That, I must agree with."

Yixing pads over and slips into bed beside Baekhyun. He pulls the covers up over Baekhyun's bare body.

"You'll catch a cold if you sleep like that. You refuse to wear clothes so you might as well make sure that you're covered up."

"As long as I have you to take care of me, hyung, I have nothing to worry about."

"You'll always have me, Baekhyun."

Baekhyun gives him a searching look, "Will I really?"

"Wh―why wouldn't you?" Yixing is confused.

"I want us to be together forever. Actually hyung, can we get married? I wanna be your wife."

Yixing stares at him speechlessly. He definitely is still drunk.

"Umm…"

"Yes, hyung. That's perfect. I can be your wife and you can show me off and I'll be all pretty for you and we can adopt children and have a pet cat and be disgustingly domestic and everyone will be jealous of our perfect family. We'll have a beautiful beachside wedding and we'll wear flower crowns and complementing tuxedos and go to Europe for our honeymoon. And we'll definitely get the others to sing at our wedding. Of course, Kyungsoo and Chanyeol will also obviously engaged at around the same time. Ooh! We can go on double dates together and everything. And―"

"Baek! Baekhyun. Woah,” Yixing cuts him off. “Slow down there, buddy. Take a deep breath. You're talking so fast I can't even keep up." Yixing is overwhelmed. He chuckles at the sheer inconceivability of the conversation.

Baekhyun pauses and Yixing takes that moment to interject.

"So. Um… you want to marry me?"

"Yes! It's the only way I'll get to keep you by my side forever and ever."

"I promised that I wouldn't leave EXO, didn't I? I'm not going anywhere."

Baekhyun waves his hands wildly in the air in frustration, "That's not what I'm talking about! I'm talking about you. And me. Not the others. Not EXO. What happens after EXO, hyung? We can't be together forever as a group no matter how much we might wish so. What about when we're thirty? Fourty? Fifty?"

"We could . I mean look at Shinhwa and Sechskies."

Baekhyun shakes his head so violently and impatiently that Yixing is afraid it might fall right off. "No, no, no hyung. You and I both know that's not gonna happen. And I can't bear to let you go, so you're just going to have to marry me."

And for one second―just one fleeting second―Yixing actually lets himself imagine the idea. He lets himself imagine living with Baekhyun. Calling the man his husband. Having their own house. Coming home to him. Maybe even raising kids with him in the far-off future. Yixing knows Baekhyun is not in his right mind. He's drunk. He can't actually mean it. But for that one second, Yixing is content to dream about the home they could've built for themselves. In another world. In another lifetime.

"But Baekhyun, don't you think you'd rather find yourself a nice girl and settle down with her?" Yixing asks.

"I don't want a girl. I want you," Baekhyun pouts. "I've been trying to get your attention for ages and—oh my god hyung you're so ing oblivious. It's so frustrating ."

Yixing, quite honestly, is at a loss for words. He doesn't know what to say.

He remembers the one time when Jongin had explained to him that there were different types of drunks:

"Chanyeol is an emotional, philosophical drunk. He goes from being scarily happy to questioning the mysteries of the universe. Kyungsoo is a quiet drunk. But he can be downright scary if you ask me. Junmyeon is a tearful drunk. He'll cry over anything and everything Minseok is a clingy drunk. Sehun is a whiny drunk. Jongdae is an angry drunk," he remembers Jongin saying.

"And Baekhyun?" Yixing had asked.

"Baekhyun? Baekhyun is an honest drunk."

Yixing reaches over the nightstand to turn the light off, "We should go to sleep. It's four in the morning. And you're going to have a terrible hangover in the morning. No sleep will just make it worse."

Baekhyun sighs reluctantly but settles in beside Yixing.

Yixing glances at him. The younger boy is flushed red and his eyes are glazed over and beaming brightly.

Yixing lets out a low whistle, "You're really drunk, aren't you? You probably won't remember any of this tomorrow. It's probably for your own good, to be honest. You'd kill me for letting you say the things you did." He chuckles. "But I have to admit, you are adorable."

Nuzzling into him like a puppy, Baekhyun slurs drunken and sleepily, "Hyung, you're so comfortable." He sighed contentedly, "Like a marshmallow. Or a cloud. And warm. Like the inside of a kangaroo pouch…"

Yixing stifles a laugh and Baekhyun's hair.

He slowly drifts to sleep. The last thing he remembers is Baekhyun murmuring something in his ear about how monkeys have , pink asses and how Shrek is love, Shrek is life.

-

"Oh you're awake my dear wife-y! I brought you some aspirin and a glass of water."

Baekhyun groans and covers his eyes, in a valiant attempt to block out the morning light.

Yixing sits on his bedside and hands him the pill which Baekhyun gulps down with the water.

"How's my wife feeling this fine morning?"

Baekhyun groans again and refuses to make eye contact, "That actually happened?"

"Yep!" Yixing replies brightly. "I seem to recall you saying something about flower crowns and cats and―"

"Stop, stop, stop. Don't you dare," Baekhyun cuts him off threateningly.

"Hey it's not me. You were the one who started."

"Ugh. I don't even remember most of it."

"I can help jog your memory if you like!" Yixing responds chirpily.

"No thanks," is Baekhyun's flat reply.

"Wise decision. Honestly, I think it's better if you don't remember."

Baekhyun finally decides to brave a look at him. "Did you just call me your wife? he asks incredulously.

"Yes I did. That seems to be what you want."

Baekhyun groans embarrassedly and covers his face again. Yixing can see his blush even through his fingers.

"Number one, I would never be your wife. Gender roles are ed up. There is no man and woman in gay relationships. That’s not how it works. We'd just be two dudes in love and happily married. Husbands," Baekhyun says vehemently.

Yixing holds up his hands, "Like I said, your words, not mine. You seemed to have some secret fantasy about being my wife. I mean, why would you say it―even when drunk―if you hadn't thought about it before?"

Baekhyun flops back down on the bed and cries out in exaggerated despair, "How am I going to live with myself?! Leave me alone you cruel person. I have a splitting headache and you aren't making anything better."

"You're saying this to the person who just brought you aspirin."

"Shut up."

Yixing laughs at him lovingly.

"Fine. Fine Baekhyunnie. I'll forget everything you said. But first, you have to give me an explanation. Why the hell did you go and get drunk like that?"

And all of a sudden, Baekhyun refuses to make eye contact with him again. "Does there have to be a reason? he asks in a defensive tone. "Isn't a guy just allowed to go and get drunk once in awhile without everyone saying there's something wrong?"

Yixing leans closer and takes Baekhyun's hands in his own, "But there is a reason. I know you Baekhyun. And I know you don't just go and do stupid, pointless things like that just because. What happened?"

Yixing feels Baekhyun tense under his touch but after a moment, he sighs and leans into Yixing.

"I'm sorry, hyung," he murmurs.

Yixing pulls him into an embrace, "It's okay, Baekhyunnie. Just don't do anything like that ever again, okay? You gave Junmyeon hyung quite a fright. And―dammit―you can't do that to me. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if you got hurt."

"I'm sorry," Baekhyun whispers again.

"It's okay," Yixing repeats and presses a kiss to his forehead.

Baekhyun pulls back a little and gives him a weary smile, "I wish I could tell you what's wrong but I can't. Not just yet. I'm not ready. But when the time is right, I promise I'll tell you everything, hyung. Okay?"

Yixing pauses, genuinely thinking over what he’s just heard.

"Okay, Baekhyun. I trust you," he gives him a reassuring smile and pulls him back into his arms.

But he still can't ignore that nagging voice at the back of his head telling him this is all his fault.

For now though, he'll be content with what he has. A hungover Baekhyun in his arms. He couldn't be luckier.

"As your husband, I, Zhang Yixing, order you, Byun Baekhyun, my lovely wife, to lie down and rest."

Baekhyun slaps his shoulder playfully and pulls Yixing down onto the bed beside him.

Yes. He really is the luckiest man alive.

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So… excuses. My laptop was in repair for about 10 days so I couldn't post anything even if wanted to. (I can't post from my phone. It's too much work.) And it was the last week of the quarter so I had a ton of work. My grades are close to dropping dangerously low and I can't have that. I apologize in advance because the updates might be slower from here on out, due to the end of the school year drawing close.

And yes, I might have been a bit *cough* high *cough* out of it when I wrote this. And yes, I was thinking about Natasha Romanoff. Fun fact: Scarlett Johansson was my first, serious female celebrity crush. She helped me realize how ing gay I really am.

Also, has anyone noticed that these authors notes are getting longer and longer with each chapter? Pretty soon they'll be longer than the whole story!

Comments and kudos are appreciated! <3