Here's just a short little continuation to the story.

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Beep. Beep. Beep.

The alarm rang incessantly. Jaebum reached blindly over to the night stand to slap it into snooze before rolling back over and snuggling into the beautiful man who was sleeping beside him. It had been a little over a year since their first date and he could barely believe the stuttering mess he had been then. Well perhaps he still could. But Jaebum could honestly say that it had been the happiest year of his life. Never had he been so in love. He loved Jackson; he loved him with every fibre of his being. And Jackson loved him too, something he would never not be surprised about. Which was why he was going to ask him to marry him.

Marry him. Jaebum’s eyes flew open as he felt the anxiety hit his stomach and chest. It would be that night. He rolled onto his back and stared up at the ceiling. He was so worried. But why? Jackson loved him, he knew that. But what if he didn’t want that kind of commitment? What if it was too soon? They had only been dating a year after all. Oh god. No. He was going to do this. He wanted to do this from the start.

Beep. Beep. Beep.

The alarm rang again. This time Jaebum turned it off properly and sat up. Beside him Jackson stirred.

“Urgh, is it time to get up?” Jackson yawned and stretched.

“Yep, afraid so.” Jaebum leaned down and kissed him. Before he could pull away, Jackson had hooked his arm around his neck and drew him down for a second kiss. “We have to go to work.” He couldn’t help grinning at Jackson’s grunt of discontent.

“Work always ruins the morning. At least tomorrow morning we’re going to be by the sea, in a beautiful luxurious hotel, with the whole morning ahead of us.” Jackson grinned playfully. While Jaebum tried to smile too, he couldn’t help thinking about how different things could be the next morning. Maybe they would be happily engaged, or… He didn’t want to think about the ‘or’.

***

“Jinyoung? Jinyoung, why didn’t you answer?” Jaebum hissed through the phone. It was his lunch break at work and the anxieties had got too much for him.

“Because I have a life.” he sounded bored.

“Jinyoung I’ve been thinking, what if I save the proposal for a few months’ time? Surely a year of dating isn’t long enough, you know? I might ruin this whole relationship like- “

“Jaebum stop.” Jinyoung cut in. “Do you love Jackson?”

“Yes of course, you know this I- “

“Does Jackson love you?”

“Yes.” He started to understand what Jinyoung was perhaps getting at.

“Do you want to be with him forever?”

“Yes.”

“Is there any doubt, any single speck of doubt that Jackson is the ‘one’?”

Jaebum thought. There was no doubt. He didn’t reply, Jinyoung knew the answer any way.

“Jaebum isn’t it quite clear, that if you want to do this and is you know it’s the right thing to do for you then you’re just going to have to do it?”

“Hmm.”

“Think about Jackson.” Was the last thing Jinyoung said before hanging up and getting back to his ‘life’. Jaebum now knew he couldn’t not do this. No matter the answer, he had to do it, even if he could barely stand up due to the anxiety.

***

The hotel was beautiful. The sea was beautiful. The dinner was fantastic. Although Jaebum still had a really hard time noticing all these things because he kept fiddling with the small box in his pocket.

They were here for the whole weekend but Jaebum had decided to propose on the first night for precisely this reason. So that he wouldn’t be riddled with anxiety the whole time.

“Is something wrong?” Jackson asked, looking concerned. He had noticed his distractedness, of course he had.

“I’m fine.” He smiled. “It’s a b-beautiful night. Shall we go f-for a walk?” was all he managed to get out. If Jackson noticed Jaebum’s stuttering, he didn’t make it known and simply nodded and smiled.

It was getting closer. This was real. Jaebum took deep breathes, trying not to make it too obvious. He was almost certain that Jackson would say yes, but he couldn’t help thinking that nothing is 100% certain. They were walking along the beach. The sea was beautiful, the light of the moon and stars shimmered on the almost completely still water. Gently, the waves murmured onto the sand.

Okay, now or never.

“Jackson.” Jaebum blurted louder than he intended. They stopped, facing the sea. “I- I-…” Oh , his mind was blanking he couldn’t remember how to speak, oh god this was awful –

“Hey what is it?” Jackson asked, placing his hand onto Jaebum’s neck, centring him back into reality. He looked up into Jackson’s eyes, those big beautiful eyes. He might not be able to speak but he could show Jackson.

Jaebum knelt on one knee. Jackson froze at the action, his eyes following his boyfriend down. Jaebum fumbled into his pocket trying to get the box out. Finally getting it out, he noticed how much his hands were shaking. He could barely hold the box.

He looked up at Jackson. He was still frozen, staring. He couldn’t stop now, had to keep going.

But it was impossible to open the box, his hands wouldn’t stop shaking.

.

Then warm hands cupped his, holding them still. Steadying him. He looked up to see Jackson crouching in front of him, worry and concern in his eyes.

“Jaebum, it’s okay. Breathe.” He squeezed his hands. “Speak to me.” What did he do to deserve Jackson? With Jackson’s hands on his, he managed to open the box.

“Jackson, I love you more than anything.” His voice was still shaky. “I want to be with you forever so… will…” he took a deep breath. Of course, Jackson knew what he was going to say but he knew that Jaebum needed to say this “will you marry me?”

“Yes.” Jackson said almost as soon as he asked. “Yes, yes, yes, yes.” He placed his hands on either side of his face and kissed him deeply. “A million times yes, forever.”

Jaebum like the weight of the world had been lifted from his shoulders and he felt an explosion of love for being alive.

“I love you so much.” Jackson said then and Jaebum wondered what he had ever been anxious about.