Resignation
Ephemeral DreamsMyungsoo's eyes fluttered open befor dawn could come. Mind made up, he knew he had to leave prior to the others coming to check on him. An arm wrapped around his waist and he felt lips brush against his skin below his earlobe. A small grin spread as he turned his head to come face to face with his beautiful blonde lover. Sungjong gave him a sad smile, laying his head on Myungsoo's shoulder.
"I know what you're planning..." The dead man whispered as Myungsoo ran his fingertips through the soft, pale hair. "How can I stop you?"
"Sungjong, I love you."Myungsoo kissed the top of his lover's head befor slipping out of bed. Going to the closet, he selected the outfit his boyfriend had loved on him the most. The dead man stood close by, carefully watching over him.
"I love you too, Myungsoo..." He sighed, shaking his head. "Please rethink this. Please." Myungsoo turned to kiss him, rubbing his beautiful cheek with his thumb.
"Baby, everything will be okay. I promise." Myungsoo finished slipping on his clothes and left the apartment. Finding himself alone, he trudged toward his destination in silence. Knowing what he was about to do, he had almost felt a spark of contentment inside of himself. It hadn't mattered if the Sungjong he had been seeing was a spirit or a drunken hallucination anymore.
Rain began to fall as Myungsoo approached the tall building where their hideaway resided. This place was where everything had started for him. Sungjong came into his life here. They had fallen in love here and shared their first kiss on the roof during Sungkyu's burthday party. It was where he had confessed his feelings for the first time and where Sungjong had truly become his. Up on that roof was where his life had bagan and now... Well, it seemed like a fitting place for it to end as well.
As he stared up at the hulking building a comforting presence made itself known to him. Slowly, he turned to face the gorgeous man, blonde hair untouched by the elements. In the muted, predawn light, Sungjong lifted his hand to caress Myungsoo's cheek. A forlorn expression was still present on his delicate features but he seemed more resigned than befor.
"Please, Myungsoo. Don't do this." Sungjong begged, his voice desperate in his last ditch effort to stop him. "Go be with Sungyeol. Move on and be happy. You deserve that." Pulling away from his lover, Myungsoo shook his head, giving him a soft smile.
"I can't do that, baby. I can't live one more day on this earth without you by my side." He looked down, feeling Sungjong's aura dissipate. "I am so sorry." Turning, he half stumbled toward his goal. The rain had let up before he entered the building but the temperature was still dropping. With a shiver, he closed the door and made his way up the old, musky staircase.
The view from the roof was breathtaking. Finally, the sun was beginning to crawl over the horizon, casting a soft glow on the world around him despite the solid gray of the clouds above him. A car pulled into the lot far below and it wasn't hard to identify it as Howon's. Watching his friends file into the building, he sighed. Time was running out and he needed to do what he had come there for befor it was too late. Stepping forward, he caught sight of Sungjong once more.
"Myungsoo... I love you..." The blonde sighed, his tone gloomy. Myungsoo nodded, wishing he had time to brush his fingertips over his lover's skin one last time.
"I love you too, Sungjong." Taking another step toward the edge he let out a heavy sigh. "Forgive me for this."
"Always." Came Sungjong's quiet reply as the rooftop door opened, chasing away the image of his lover. Snow began to drift down as he neared the edge. Sungjong had always loved the snow, often saying tje soft flakes reminded him of angel feathers. If anyone were to know angels, Myungsoo was sure it would have been his beautiful, kind Sungjong.
"Myungsoo, wait!" Woohyun shouted behind him. Tears fell down Myungsoo's cheeks as he teetered on the rooftop ledge. Sungjong was everything that gave him meaning and Myungsoo was honestly just so tired of living a life without purpose. He didn't want to cause his friends any more pain, didn't want to hurt Sungjong either, but in the end, with the downy snow coating his head and shoulders, he knew that there was only ever one choice he could have made, one outcome to all of this. Closing his eyes, Myungsoo took a deep breath and moved.
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