Surviving

The Price of Innocence

                With the dawn of a new day, Byunghyun felt a little less tired but no less confused. Daylight let him get a clearer look at his companion and when they stepped from the entryway, he confirmed the dark patches on Mika’s skin had to be fading bruises. When the other man realized he was looking, he self-consciously pulled his robe down to try and hide them, looking away. It was abundantly clear to the unicorn that this man was no warrior so that marks confused him.

                He pointed and grunted. “Huh?”

                Mika continued to look away as he shook his head. “They’re --thing.”

                Byunghyun didn’t believe his dismissive gesture, but short of adding more marks, he didn’t know how else to make the other man speak. Annoyed, he snorted loudly and crossed his arms, focusing instead on scanning the horizon. Narrowed eyes glanced the way they’d come, from the… west if he was right. He knew Mika didn’t want to go to the northwest and he didn’t want to go southeast. Frowning at the location of the sun, he stomped his foot and then winced when something pinched the sole. Teeth bared, he looked down but saw nothing more than weedy soil.

                “You need -------.” Mika was looking him up and down when the unicorn met his eyes.

                He glanced down at his uncovered form and peered at his companion, figuring he was referring to the lack of coverings. The coverings seemed bothersome and inefficient. They certainly didn’t help when he was cutting men down… He pointed at Mika and grunted.

                “No,” he shook his head automatically, clasping the fabric closer around him.

                The unicorn ground his teeth in frustration when he saw the other man closing off again. He balled his hands into fists and hit his head lightly, shaking it after a pause. He didn’t want his coverings. Trying again, he pointed at Mika and then grunted as he pointed outwards. While he didn’t like the idea of wearing anything, he had never seen a human before. It was likely he would draw more attention this way than as a unicorn.

                “Ah. I see,” Mika exhaled in relief, a glimmer of vitality returning to his gaze. “We’ll have to find some,” he explained, looking around too. When Byunghyun made a questionable sound, he turned and clarified, “Where?”

                “Where,” Byunghyun nodded, grabbing at the semi-familiar word eagerly.

                “In a village, --------,” he shrugged, confusing the unicorn with the last word. When the man saw his furrowed brows, he added, “There has to be one ------.”

                “Ah.” Byunghyun wasn’t entirely sure but he nodded as if he understood and then pointed towards the northwest.

                Mika followed his finger and took a pensive expression. “You sure?” At the unicorn’s questionable look, he continued, “That way lies Machemay.” When all he got was a blank look, he laughed softly and added slowly with gestures, “The people you ------ fight.”

                He didn’t understand all the words, but with the other motions, Byunghyun understood the gist of what he was talking about. Looking to the southeast, he frowned. “Home bad.”

                “My home is bad ---,” Mika confirmed, drawing the unicorn’s attention.

                That settled it then. With a nod, Byunghyun slapped his chest, “I. Mika. Go.”

                “Okay then,” the other man nodded in understanding, turning to face the direction they wanted to go.

                In the distance to the north, they could see a rising mountain range and to the easterly direction, they could see a vast forest covering the ground. The latter seemed closer and the mountains seemed a day or so out, but they would not be heading to either. Their destination was the space between. Byunghyun had a sinking feeling that there would also be a road there. Roads meant people. He really didn’t want to see any others right now, but, with another glance at Mika, he knew they needed more than what they could find out here.

                This long removed from living in the wild, he didn’t know what he could eat or drink. He certainly wouldn’t be any good at finding something in this form. And when it really started to get cold, this body would be pitiful against the weather. No… the best thing to do would be to find… people. With a reluctant sigh, he reached out to grab Mika’s wrist.

                “You don’t have to keep ------ me, you know,” he murmured with resigned acceptance. The words were a gentle refute but there was no struggle in his arm.

                Byunghyun looked down at the link between them, feeling the intent of the words more than actually understanding them. After a long pause, he took another breath and simply said, “We go.” He didn’t really believe Mika would try to run away, but he was afraid – not that he would admit it – to let the other man go. If he disappeared, would this calm too?

                Bedraggled and frustrated – the inability to communicate was confounding, the pair cautiously made their way towards the region of Machemay. They found a road first, as expected, but stuck to the wilds where they could easily hide, if need be. Fortunately, there weren’t that many people on the path and those that were, were more focused on their own concerns. But still… it became very apparent that they wouldn’t be able to cross the checkpoint between kingdoms. Especially not as they were now. Byunghyun was too pale by far, Mika had seen better days, and both were much too thin. His blonde hair was too bright and Mika’s features too strange. He was both pretty and foreign, and that coming from a unicorn that had been locked up all his life was saying something.

                It was still somewhat early in the morning when they stopped and stared at the collection of soldiers and people at the border between regions. Byunghyun gave a frustrated groan and Mika held his tongue. “Where?” the unicorn demanded, frustrated by where they were.

                Mika shrugged and blinked quickly as he looked around. “I don’t know these -----. There should be a smaller ------ close by, with the ------ here, but I don’t know where.” He cringed when he finished his explanation, obviously waiting for some kind of punishment.

                The action confused Byunghyun and he snorted, shaking his head like he would have when he was in his unicorn form. It felt weird and didn’t have the desired effect. He made a note not to do that again. “Water,” he huffed instead, looking around with a pained expression. Stopping made him painfully aware of just how little he’d had to drink since the other day. He was hungry too but his mouth currently felt like it was a desert and, by the way Mika nodded along, he figured the other man felt similarly. Curse this form! He couldn’t smell it nearby either.

                “There may be a spring near the foot of the mountains,” Mika gestured uncertainly.

                Again, some words were strange and others were odd in the context, but Byunghyun figured what he meant when he followed the direction he was looking. Uncomfortably, he fidgeted in place as he looked back towards the people on the road and the checkpoint. At last, he settled his gaze on Mika and mumbled, “Ask water.” He waved quickly towards the road, very much disinclined to even mention it.

                It took a second to register, but when it did, Mika flinched as if he’d been struck. “I can’t,” he shook his head, looking down.

                “Why?” Byunghyun demanded, grip tightening in annoyance.

                “Many reasons,” Mika whispered, so quietly the unicorn almost didn’t hear him.

                Rolling his eyes, Byunghyun groaned again, slouching where he knelt. A hundred different thoughts whirled through his mind, not the least of which was trying to figure out what Mika had intended if he couldn’t even approach other people himself. Had he wanted to die out there? He narrowed his eyes as the thought came to him, looking at the other man harder. Mika hadn’t looked up yet, but that only gave the unicorn more excuse to stare: at the delicate features, at the nice clothes, at the untold bruises… Things did not add up, but he did not have the words to ask. “Ugh…” he groaned, grinding his teeth. “We… go!” the unicorn grumbled, standing up and yanking the human along as he started to make his way towards the foot of the mountains. Maybe there would be a village of something before they got there.

                Byunghyun had never considered luck before, but when they happened upon a small game trail – he at least knew what it was, they also stumbled across a small spring of water burbling gently from the ground. At soon as he sighted it, it was immediately where he pulled Mika, letting him go only so that he could throw himself at the liquid. Unicorn like, he splashed right into the shallow water and nearly fell face first into it, up draughts as fast as he could. Drenched and smeared with wet muck now, he looked up to see Mika acting in a far more restrained manner.

                Hands cupped together, he drank calmly from them as if they were a bowl. Byunghyun thought it was much less efficient. But then he started to wipe off the worst of the grime. The bruises were even worse when not covered in mud. It made the unicorn sad in a way. He never bruised but he knew that coloration on skin. And it let him see the bite mark on his arm: the one he had given him… It looked worse in the daylight and Byunghyun actually felt… bad.

                “You should wash,” Mika suggested quietly, keeping his eyes down as he focused on his own task. With careful, tender ministrations, he cleaned the worst of the muck around his injury, face tense the whole time. When Byunghyun didn’t move after a couple moments though, he looked up to gesture at his dirty skin so as to mime what the unicorn did not immediately understand.

                “Ah,” Byunghyun nodded once, shaking from his partial mesmerized state to glance at the water. He watched Mika for a moment longer and then just rolled in the shallow depths, drenching himself happily. Soaking wet and belly full of water, he was cleaner and less thirsty but still hungry. His attempt to eat the grass next to the stream was… less than pleasant. “Bleh,” he spat, pushing the bitter greenery out of his mouth with his tongue. This form did not like grass.

                Mika laughed at him softly, one eye looking at him and the other on their surroundings. Annoyed but wary in turn, Byunghyun followed his example. He doubted they had been followed – by anyone really – but it still felt strange being out in the open. Water had been enough to make him forget about most of everything else for a moment, but the reality of being hunted came crashing down again as soon as that pressing need was sated. And other needs arose anyway, hunger being the primary one.

                Staring at the grass, he realized this form was pitifully bad at just about everything. It was enough to make him consider trying to transform again. Almost. But then he realized that Mika was standing up and seemed to be moving away. His eyes were looking into the distance and he had closed his robes around him once more, defensive and vulnerable. Confused, the unicorn watched in silence, but the further the other man walked away, the more Byunghyun’s skin itched, and the more his belly coiled with unnamed anger. “No… Mika!” he called out, lurching after him to catch up as quickly as possible. And just like that, the feeling went away. He felt fine. With an almost desperate surge of energy, he grabbed Mika’s wrist and held tight. “No,” he shook his head, frowning. He wanted to keep his sanity for at least a little bit longer. He wanted to live in more than just a cage and haze of anger.

                Though he couldn’t explain anything to Mika, the man simply sighed and looked at the hand holding his. “Okay.” He glanced up again, meeting Byunghyun’s dark eyes with shadowed orbs of his own. “I’ll stay,” he whispered, the words flat and resigned.

                It was enough. They were still lost and he was hungry and he had no idea what to do or what was going on, but having Mika nearby was enough. For now anyway. They returned to the water slowly, Byunghyun walking back into the liquid while Mika hovered just at the edge. “Food,” the unicorn mumbled eventually, pawing at the surface as if he could find some hiding within.

                “You’re hungry?” Mika asked in clarification. At Byunghyun’s nod in response, he laughed once. “Me too.”

                “Who?” Byunghyun snorted, staring hard at his companion.

                “I don’t know,” Mika responded with furrowed brows. The unicorn glared and tried again, pointing angrily at the surrounding area. “Where?” he hesitantly corrected. At Byunghyun’s quick nod, he frowned again. “Good question.”

                Frustrated, the unicorn smacked the water with his fists and laid down, mostly submerged. It didn’t take long for him to get cold though, so he crawled out and shook off, spraying Mika with droplets from his hair. Oblivious to the human’s scrutiny, he flopped onto his back and tried rolling like he would in unicorn form. The results were… ungraceful to say the least. After a few awkward attempts – and uncomfortable scratches on his tender back – Byunghyun gave up with a perturbed groan. “Bad!” he snapped, shaking his hands in the hair as he glared at them. When Mika didn’t respond, he looked up instead. “What do?” he asked when he noticed his companion digging at the water’s edge.

                “Food. Maybe,” Mika amended quickly, the light in Byunghyun’s eyes making him recant his certainty.

                “Where!” the unicorn gasped, scrambling to get close so he could see.

                “These -----,” he pointed, showing Byunghyun the dainty leafed foliage at the edge.

                “Food?” he questioned, pointing at the leaves as he leaned close.

                “Yes, but here, too. The ----,” he explained, finally clearing away enough soil to dig up one of the roots at the bottom. “I think it’s water-----,” he murmured, brows furrowed while he washed it off.

                “Watercress?” the unicorn sounded out the word, watching in wonder as the small whitish round thing was revealed.

                Mika nodded and then nibbled at the outside, carefully tasting to make sure. “I think it’s okay,” he smiled quietly, facial expression changing several times as he tried to decide for sure.

                “Food!” the unicorn reached out his hand. For a moment, it didn’t seem as if Mika would listen, and Byunghyun felt himself getting angry, but then the other man reluctantly handed it over. Hungrily, the unicorn took a large bite of the root and stopped mid-chew as he got a taste. It wasn’t the most pleasant, but it was at least edible. Deciding it would do for now, he greedily devoured the rest, trying the leaves in the process. They weren’t as good as the root, but not bad either. And Mika didn’t try to stop him so he figured it was okay.

                “Not bad,” Mika shrugged, cautiously eating the next one he’d found. He was sitting carefully, knees folded under him and arms close to his body.

                Byunghyun thought it was a strange way to eat. Or sit for that matter, all closed off and taking up as little space as possible. Scooting closer, he extended his hand and said again, “Food.”

                “You can get some,” the other man nodded at the water, obviously gesturing towards the few plants still growing from the edges. Other creatures had found some of them, as evidenced by the nibbled stalks and barer patches, but a handful had been left behind.

                “Food!” the unicorn insisted more firmly. He didn’t know how to admit, nor would he do so, that he didn’t know how to find his own food in this situation. As a unicorn, it wouldn’t be a problem, but this body was useless…

                Mika’s brows dipped and his lips pressed together. Sighing slowly, he mutely handed Byunghyun his own half-eaten watercress, ignoring the unicorn as he turned to dig up more. Content that he was being fed, the unicorn remained silent and ate the watercress as they appeared, not giving Mika a chance to stack them. By the time he’d finished digging up the small patch, Byunghyun was still hungry but there were no more left, except the two that Mika had kept on his side instead of handing over.

                “Food,” he pointed at the uneaten one on Mika’s other side.

                “Mine,” he responded flatly, holding the one in his hand with the other protected near his leg.

                “I,” the unicorn pointed at his open mouth, determined. When Mika only shook his head, he frowned harder and then reached to try and take the other one.

                “No,” Mika chided, slapping the hand smartly.

                “Ow!” Byunghyun flinched, yanking his hand back in surprise. Wide-eyed, he stared at Mika as if he’d grown a second head. That had never happened before. Thinking maybe it was just a fluke, he tried again with similar results.

                “No!” Mika hit his hand again, the sting and his voice sharper this time. Accusingly, he pointed a finger in Byunghyun’s face and raised one brow. “Mine.”

                Smarting and confused, the unicorn crossed his arms over his chest and turned away, pouting. No one had ever told him no before. And they had certainly never slapped his hand. He’d been hurt in combat plenty of times, but this was something different. This was new and he didn’t like it, especially the look Mika had given him. “Food,” he grumbled pitifully without looking back.

                “We’ll have to ---- more -----,” Mika sighed around a small mouthful.

                No longer as hungry, but definitely annoyed, Byunghyun brushed at his pale, messy bangs. Fresh water drops sprinkled down on him and he waved at them animatedly, venting his frustration with exaggerated movements. He listened to Mika eating and then crawled back to the water to try and fill his belly with the liquid instead.

                “You’re going to make -------- sick,” his companion cautioned. Byunghyun just glared at him quietly. “Okay,” he shrugged, eating the last of his watercress as the unicorn continued drinking. It didn’t take long for Mika to be right. “Told you,” he cringed sympathetically as Byunghyun glared in distaste at what had just come back up.

                “Bad,” he muttered disagreeably. But then he saw a chunk of watercress that hadn’t been chewed that well. “Oh.” He picked it up, wrinkled his nose at the smell, washed it off in the water, and then ate it again. Tasted alright. “What?” he asked when he saw Mika looking at him in mild disgust.

                “Nothing,” the other man shook his head, features smoothing out as he quickly hid whatever else he was feeling.

                The unicorn shrugged and stood up. After getting sick, he felt a bit better, but he was going to be hungry again soon and they still didn’t know where they were. The guard post was a problem to get around for sure and neither of them looked… ordinary. “Where?” he asked, turning to the other man. He wished he knew some place to go, but the only other location he knew of was his home before the humans. He didn’t remember where it was though.

                “I don’t know,” Mika shrugged with a slight frown. He started to chew on his bottom lip and it made Byunghyun curious.

                The unicorn tried it too but found it hurt if he bit too hard. “Why?” he asked, pointing at Mika’s mouth. When the other man seemed confused about what he was asking, Byunghyun chewed on his lip and pointed.

                It made Mika laugh, which only served to confuse the unicorn more. “I do it when I’m thinking,” he explained, lips pulled into a reluctant smile. Now it was Byunghyun’s turn to raise a brow. “We can’t go to Nagorad and we can’t go to Weissen and we can’t go to Machemay because of the checkpoint. But…” he trailed off with a glance at the mountains to the north of them. “I’ve heard there is -------- to be had in the mountains.”

                “Sanctuary?” Byunghyun echoed in uncertainty.

                “A safe place,” Mika clarified. “It could be dangerous though.”

                The unicorn scoffed at the word: dangerous. He knew that word. He’d been described that way for a long time. “I dangerous,” he jabbed his chest with his finger almost proudly.

                “True,” his companion nodded thoughtfully. He took a short breath and then shrugged. “What have we got to lose? Maybe we can find you some ------- on the way.”

                By the up and down look Mika gave him, Byunghyun understood he was talking about the lack of coverings. “I okay.”

                “For now,” the other man nodded in gentle amusement. Comfortable in his own skin or not, when things got colder – like the further they headed into the mountains – they would both need more clothes.

                Byunghyun just shrugged and lightly grabbed Mika’s wrist, waiting for him to get up before he started pulling. “We go,” he confirmed, pointing towards the rising hills in the distance.

                Mika sighed and gave him a sidelong look. “I already said you don’t have to pull me.”

                The unicorn ignored him as he led the way, pretending his feet didn’t hurt and that he wasn’t starting to get cold in this form. He would never admit that he was at least a little afraid that if he let Mika go, the other man would just leave him. Byunghyun couldn’t allow that right now. He needed to understand what was happening and for that, he had to keep Mika close, whether the other man wanted it or not.

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Amalya
Finally sitting down for some long overdue planning and world building. It's pretty amazing how figuring things out about the whos and the wheres and the whats and the whys can make you want to write more. XD

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-Tigress-
#1
Chapter 2: Okay this is incredibly intriguing. I love how you've built this world and this mystery of what and why Byunghyun is how he is, and the way that you've painted the "madness" and the difference that makes him so unique is really well done. His background is so sad and so interesting, I can hardly wait to learn more! And of course, this stranger must be Mika... what happened to make his eyes so dead and why didn't he want to go in the direction he came.from? And of course I have more questions, but they'll wait for now. All in all, great start to what looks to be a fantasy epic. ♡
faithful-lie
#2
Wow your poster!!!! I'm looking forward to having time to read this!
-Tigress-
#3
Omg you weren't kidding, that poster really is great!
-Tigress-
#4
Oh Ho Ho you have built upon it! I'm quite excited for this!
DGNA_Forever
#5
Wah! I can't wait for this! It looks so exciting♡.
danSINGirlS2BB #6
I read it as the prince of innocence. Hahahaha.