A/N: I had to edit some parts which is why it took a long time. I can't stress how much I love the lyrics of 'Rough' which results in this three-shots. Those were the lyrics of 'Rough' by the way. And here you go, the last chapter!

Till next time... xoxo

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The freezing temperature reaches to her face the moment she gets out from the subway station. The thick pair of gloves isn’t enough to keep her warm. She shivers as a Christmas tree beside the station greets her. It is dark and she is grateful that there is a string of lights illuminated along the snow-covered path. She hastily finds her way to the destination along the shelter way.

Reaching the doorstep, she rings the bell and waits for a response.

“Sowon-unnie,” Sinb greets as the high school friend comes into view but before she can continue, she is dragged into the house. “Come in quickly, it’s really cold.”

“When did you start to care about me so much?” She teases as the other girl gives her a light smack on her arm before engulfing her into a hug.

It has been long since they have last seen one another. If it isn’t for the invitation to her house tonight, she doesn’t know when she can have an excuse to tear herself away from the busy adult life to revisit her high school friends. They are a precious memory to her.

“Seokjin-oppa has went out to buy some baby diapers. He will be back in a while.” Sowon says as she pulls away and leads the girl into the living room.

The television is . Sinb gets distracted by it and starts to take off her outer wear as soon as she sees the heater. Sitting onto the leather couch, she watches as the girl goes into the kitchen, “I’ll get you some warm water.”

“Thanks, unnie.”

Scanning her eyes around the room, she suddenly notices that something isn’t right. She looks at her watch; it’s already way past their meeting time. There is supposed to be six of them here.

“Unnie, why is it only me? Where are the rest?”

Sowon returns to the living room as she hands the glass of water to the other girl carefully so that they will not spill it. Grabbing the remote control, she lowers the volume of the television down as she speaks, “Yerin has to go back to Incheon to visit her mother-in-law with her husband. Eunha and Umji is busy with their work; they couldn’t make it.”

Sinb frowns as she nods her head at the revelation, “Yuju?”

She is about to give her an answer when she hears a loud cry from the room. Feeling worried, she rushes towards there as Sinb follows behind. However, they halt their steps when Yuju comes out of the room with the fragile being in her arms.

“What happened?” Sowon asks as she takes over her child from the girl.

“I don’t know. She just woke up and cries.”

Sowon holds the baby close to her chest as she steps away to the window. Sinb grins at the sight that she thought she would never get to see. Being a mom suits the eldest after all. As soon as she turns around, she realises that she has forgotten about another presence. The same pair of eyes and the same set of smile stares at her. She returns the same.

“You’re here.”

“Yeah but just you and me today.”

∞

Sinb and Yuju sits side by side on the dining table as two empty glasses are placed in front of them. They are instantly filled up when Seokjin pours the bottle of soju into the two glasses.

“I know that the both of you are not driving. So drink it up.” Sowon offers while still holding onto the little baby, who has already fallen back into her deep slumber.

“Unnie, we still have work tomorrow unlike you.”

“Yuju is right. You are so evil trying to get us drunk.” Sinb joins in as she points to the woman before leaning close to the little baby and whispers, “Little Sojung, you must grow up pure and kind-hearted. Don’t be like your mum.”

Sowon shakes her head at the childish antic as she turns to her husband, who returns to the dining table and sits down beside her. They look at each other with a blissful smile as he put his arm around her shoulder.

“It’s good to see that the two of you are still loving each other so much,” Yuju smiles as she picks up the glass. “I’m relieved.”

“You will find one too as long as you’re not waiting for that high school admirer of yours to appear.”

“What?” She blinks a couple of time unbelievably before denying. “Of course not.”

The words make Sin’s heart beats a little faster as she watches the girl burying her eyes in the soju in embarrassment. She doesn’t comprehend her behaviours. She wonders, if she is still thinking about it a lot. Maybe she still does but she can’t bring herself to ask.

“Actually,” Yuju let out a sigh as she pauses her words. “The company has offered me a promotion but I have to be stationed in Australia. I am still pondering if I should accept it.”

Sinb doesn’t know why as she feels a sea of sadness washed across her heart. All the more, she doesn’t know why the other girl looks at her the moment she finishes her sentence. It was brief but she manages to catch it. She doesn’t know what to say.

“It is a rare opportunity. I would accept it if I were you but of course, this is life. Everything comes with a sacrifice. You have to decide what’s more important to you.” Seokjin advises for the first time.

“I agree.” Sowon says reluctantly.

She doesn’t like her friends to be far away from her. It feels unreal as if years of friendship is going down into the drain just like this. She knows how hard the distance is going to affect a lot of things. However, as much as is reluctant, she still has to respect her decision in the end.

“I will miss you though.”

Sinb lowers her head at the sudden confession the eldest had made. She wishes she is able to say that too but whatever she has thought about it, it doesn’t comes out of . They are trapped, just like her feelings towards her; they stay inside and never disappear.

Her thought is disrupted when she hears the sounds of the chairs dragging against the floor. Sowon has stood up with the baby fidgeting in her arms.

“I think we should just put her back into the cradle.” She whispers as she passes the baby into the father’s arms.

Her heart feels warm as she looks at the picture in front of her. She is the first to get married; she is the first to receive the happiness she has been looking for. Their future looks perfect. However, as she turns back to the other girl, she suddenly feels bitter. What about their future?

∞

The bus waits for the last passenger to alight before departing for the bus terminal. They leave the bus stop and Sinb follows closely behind the other girl who is walking slightly in front of her. She can’t tear her gaze off the back which seems to get lonelier as time goes by. She loves the familiar silence although she wishes that she has the courage to break it. She just wants to leave the things as the way they are but this time, it doesn’t feel right.

“Sowon-unnie looks like the happiest woman in the world just now. She gets to marry the person she loves and have a child with him.” Yuju suddenly speaks.

“Yeah, that’s what she has always wanted too. I really feel happy for her.”

“Me too.”

Yuju sighs and the other girl watches as the atmosphere falls back into silence. The uneasiness creeps up back onto her as she stares sorrowfully at her. Lowering her head, she lets out a deep breath as she catches with her, “Can I ask you something?”

She slower down in her footsteps and looks at the girl before nodding.

“Are you really going to accept the offer?”

“I don’t know,” she answers honestly with a shrug. “Like what Seokjin-oppa had said, I have to decide what’s more important to me.”

“Your family is here,” Sinb mutters which almost goes unheard.

“They are but I’m getting bored of the life here. I have always thought that it would be good to try and live a life abroad. Believe me when I say that I wanted to stay badly but no matter how hard I try to convince myself, I can’t find anything that’s worth staying for.”

The words hurt so much like she’s been stabbed in her heart multiple times continuously. Somehow, she hates how much she can say them out loud so easily as if she’s used to it. She hates how she’s saying them as if things don’t matter to her. If only she matters, even just for once.

“What about us?” She wanted to say ‘me’ initially.

“We will be leading our own lives eventually. Just like Sowon-unnie, all of us will find a good husband to settle down and have a family. We will be too busy then to even think about each other including you.” Sinb remains speechless.

“Maybe,” she watches as a dejected expression flashes across her face before it is quickly replaced by a smile which seems too wide to feel real. “You can help me find a reason to stay.”

The sentence that was just let out catches the receiver off guard. Yuju turns away as she continues to walk forward down the pavement. As she ponders hard at the words, she thought that she has seen a single tear rolling down onto the other girl’s cheek. Maybe she feels sad for leaving her behind after all however, she quickly dismisses the thought. Why would she? She questions herself as she continues to follow behind her.

It isn’t long before the pavement meets an intersection that causes the footsteps to stop. And Sinb remembers that this is the exact same location where they would always part and anticipate for a next time but not today. The harsh reality quickly daunts onto her that this is definitely a real goodbye.

“I guess this is it then?”

“I…”

She isn’t given a chance to say something when she is grabbed swiftly by the waist as the other girl lunges herself forward. Their bodies collide and their arms wrap tightly around each other. She feels her tremble.

Sinb closes her eyes at the warm that she is going to miss very much. She wants to preserve it as long as possible although she knows that she will never be able to forget. She doesn’t want to believe that this is farewell already. Unknowingly, the other girl is also clutching onto her so tightly that she doesn’t think she is ever going to let her go. Yet, good things always end as the taller girl pulls away first.

“Take care of yourself. Just know that I will always lo-“, she hesitates, “miss you.”

Yuju her hand down her hair as she confess with full of overwhelming emotions that the other girl is not capable of carrying. Maybe she did underestimate at how much the girl can affect her. It isn’t just a simple love but it’s too late.

The green light across the road activate. Sinb watches painfully as the other girl takes a few quick glance at her before she moves her hand down to hold hers. They fit so perfectly. They don’t understand how this has to end.

Retreating her hand back into the pocket, Yuju smiles and holds something into her hand before passing it to the girl. Then, the warmth finally leaves as the girl walks away without looking back, leaving Sinb behind as she stares down at the crumpled note that she is currently holding onto. She opens it.

Promise me this, I hope you don’t change
I want you to smile at me like you do now
If only I could run through time and grow up
I’ll hold your hands at the crossroads

Sinb stays rooted in her position as these familiar yet painstaking words hit her hard. She had penned it as a promise when she leaves her behind at the bench that year. It’s then she realises that she knew. She always knew and she never forgets.

Tears roll down her cheeks uncontrollably and stain the crumpled note as she sobs hard. She quickly searches for the other girl on the opposite side and sees her wiping her tears. No wonder she had always appear near the locker beside her. No wonder she had always asked to go home together. No wonder she had said those words earlier on. Everything suddenly makes sense now.

Yet, she is getting further and further away just like how the same thing had happened that year until she disappeared into the glowing autumn sunset. She had made a mistake. Clenching onto the note, she decides that she doesn’t want the same thing to happen again. She doesn’t want to end up like the crumpled note which is stained with tears; she doesn’t want to end up like her past which is stained with regrets.

The green light flickers but she doesn’t care. Gathering all her courage, she dashes across the road and catches the other girl. Turning her around by the shoulder, she crashes her lips onto hers. She pulls the other girl closer to her body when she feels her struggling against her hold. She doesn’t want to her to slip away again.

A tug is felt on her lips as the other girl finally gives in. Sinb closes her eyes at how the sweetness of the other’s lips melts onto hers. It is as if they are both dancing to one another; slow and gentle. The traffic resumes and the snow continues to fall but all of these doesn’t matter anymore. They let go eventually the lack of air.

“I’ve waited so long for this day to come.” Yuju let the tears fall freely as she can’t hold her emotions anymore.

“I’m sorry,” Sinb caresses her face with her delicate fingers.

The heart-breaking sight almost tears her into pieces as she attempts to wipe the tears off. She doesn’t deserve them because she looks the prettiest with a smile. “I was a coward but not now anymore, not when you are going far away and leaving me behind all alone.”

“You said that you couldn’t find a reason to stay. Then let me be the one. Just, don’t go.” Sinb pleads as she drags the last word a little longer, as if she will be gone if she don’t hold the time back.

“Kiss me again.”

“Huh?”

“Kiss me again and I will stay.”

Sinb giggles at the request as she places her lips back willingly onto hers, this time harder and deeper. The promise – it is sealed with the kiss.

“I love you,” the other girl whispers.

Sinb lets go for a moment and places their forehead together before staring into her eyes, “I know but I will always love you more.”

Holding onto their hands tightly, they stroll along the pavement quietly. The snow continues to grow thicker and the street lamps continue to guide their way home. Their footprints are printed firmly along the white snow just like their love and happiness, they are forever etched in each other’s hearts. They are never going to let go again.

She looks beautiful in Autumn;
But then she realises that she looks even more beautiful in Winter,
because they are smiling together.