Although the two were dating, Jonghyun tried not to let his emotions show. So when he couldn’t sleep, he continued to go to Kibum’s room and talk his way to sleep. Jonghyun never slept in Kibum’s room anymore, just because he felt like he was intruding now. Taemin would text him every night so that Jonghyun would leave the room. Everything seemed to stay the same between them, except sometimes Minho was there.

This was one of those nights. Minho had Kibum in his lap at one end of the bed and Jonghyun sat on the other. No one had spoken yet, except for the short greetings as Jonghyun walked in, and Jonghyun was debating whether he should leave or not as the couple studied him.

“Jonghyun” Kibum’s voice broke through Jonghyun’s contemplations, “Are you okay?”

Jonghyun nodded in response, “Why do you ask?”

“You haven’t picked a topic lately” Minho answered.

“And you talk a lot less” Kibum added.

“Sorry, I’ve just had a lot on my mind, I don’t mean to be so quiet” Jonghyun told them, although it wasn’t the complete truth. Just watching the two interact with each other had Jonghyun speechless with either jealousy or regret, he couldn’t tell which.

“Why don’t you pick the topic tonight then? Get some off that stuff off your mind” Kibum suggested and Minho nodded while Jonghyun sighed.

“Okay” Jonghyun paused, deciding if it was the best idea to choose such a topic, “Heartbreak” When he said it he regretted it, but there was no going back.

“Did something happen?” Minho asked concerned and Jonghyun shook his head.

“Nothing happened to me, I just made a mistake” Jonghyun explained, not wanting to give too many details.

“Is this about your first love?” Kibum asked and Jonghyun smiled at him somewhat sadly.

“Something like that, but that was in high school” Jonghyun answered.

“First loves are always heartbreaking” Minho said, and Jonghyun was thankful the topic had moved away from him.

“You never forget them” Kibum added, “And they either rip your heart out or leave you with a stronger one”

“Almost all love could do that to you though” Jonghyun said, feeling the need to pour his feelings out even if it wasn’t the best idea, “They can also make you regret your choices”

“Alright Jjong, spill, what happened?” Kibum asked and Jonghyun took a deep breath.

“I never told them how I felt, even when I felt it was the right time I just stayed quiet and now it’s too late” Jonghyun sounded angry with himself, but he felt his eyes start to tear up.

It was quiet as Kibum handed Jonghyun his tissue box, the couple watching him sadly.

“It just hurts and I don’t know how to explain this type of pain” Jonghyun told them as he wiped his eyes.

“You have to have hope, hope that maybe one day they’ll be yours” Minho replied, “Just because you think it’s too late doesn’t mean it is”

“You should also tell them how you feel, keeping it in you for so long can hurt you” Kibum suggested and Jonghyun nodded.

“I know I should tell them, but now I can’t” Jonghyun said simply, then his phone vibrated and he knew it was Taemin.

“Cheer up hyung, at least you have Taemin” Minho said, gesturing to the older’s phone that lit up.

“Yeah, you two are practically a couple with him asking you to come back every night” Kibum smiled, genuinely happy for his friend.

Jonghyun forced a smile as he texted Taemin back, not having the heart to explain the maknae’s relationship with the leader.

“He’s just looking out for you guys, wouldn’t want me getting in the way” Jonghyun explained, putting his phone in his pocket as he got up, “Goodnight”

“Goodnight” The couple replied.

“Don’t let unrequited love get you down anymore and try to get some sleep” Kibum called as Jonghyun walked out the door.

Jonghyun made a small noise of understanding as he closed the door, stopping in the hallway to take a deep breath. If he wasn’t crying earlier, he was sure as hell crying now. The quiet sobs shaking his body as he forced himself to walk away from the door. As he slowly made his way to his shared room, he spotted Taemin coming out of Jinki’s room. Their eyes met and Taemin didn’t even bother to close the door as he hurried to Jonghyun.

“Hyung, calm down, you’re going to be okay” Taemin began to comfort him, letting Jonghyun hold onto him as he helped him to their room.

Jonghyun was too busy crying to notice Jinki following them, the leader concerned about his band mate. It was the hand on his back that made Jonghyun aware of his presence as Taemin closed the door. Part of Jonghyun didn’t want to be around them, only because he knows they love each other and the thought of any couple hurts, but he knows that’s slightly selfish so he doesn’t fight it when Jinki holds him and Taemin rubs his back.

The couple didn’t dare ask what was wrong, they both knew what it could be and they knew if it was anything else, Jonghyun would say so.

“I wish this was just an unrequited love, I wish I didn’t know he cared for me at some point, I wish I never fell for him” Jonghyun vented into Jinki’s chest.

The two stayed quiet, all of the freezing at the knock on the door.

“It’s Minho” His voice came from behind the door and Jonghyun didn’t see Jinki’s nod to let him in.

Jonghyun kept his face hidden in Jinki’s chest as he listened to the door open and footsteps come close to him as the door closed.

“Jonghyun” Minho spoke softly and the older wiped his eyes before turning around, his eyes not meeting Minho’s.

“Why aren’t you with Kibum?” Jonghyun asked and Minho sighed.

“I told him Taemin needed me for something, I need to talk to you” Minho explained and Jonghyun swallowed.

“About what?” Jonghyun asked, focusing his gaze on the wall behind Minho.

“I’m so sorry about Kibum” Minho said and Jonghyun me his eyes, “I knew you liked him and I still-”

“Minho, no you have nothing to be sorry about” Jonghyun interrupted him, “You had every right to have told him how you felt”

“But I knew he still had feelings for you” Minho replied and Jonghyun shook his head.

“It’s not like you did it in spite of me, you don’t have to be sorry for my mess of emotions. Go be happy with your boyfriend and don’t worry about me, alright?” Jonghyun held back tears as he gave Minho a smile, he didn’t want his friend to feel guilty for having feelings for Kibum.

“I just feel bad that I put you in this state” Minho explained and Jonghyun laughed a little.

“It wasn’t you who did this, it was all me” Jonghyun told him, “Kibum told me he liked me the day you two got together, he said that’s why he didn’t answer at first. I took that information and let it hurt me when it wasn’t supposed to”

“Well then, can I do anything to help-”

“Just go back to Kibum before he gets suspicious” Jonghyun cut him off, “And treat him right, please please, don’t hurt him”

Minho nodded, “I promise you, I wouldn’t dare” He made for the door and Jonghyun felt his tears coming back as the tall man left.

Taemin lead Jonghyun to his bed while Jinki wiped his tears with the softest tissues he could find.

“I think you should start coming to us when you can’t sleep” Jinki suggested and Jonghyun shook his head.

“Kibum can’t figure out” Jonghyun told him as Taemin instructed him to lay down.

“At least for a few nights, or you could alternate it. Just something to stop breaking down like this” Taemin said and Jinki nodded as Jonghyun covered himself up.

“Well, you two are the ones who insist on taking care of me when this happens” Jonghyun replied and Taemin returned to Jinki’s side.

AN: So I decided to write a part 2 because I really like how the first one came out, hope you guys enjoyed :)

“Just think about it and try to sleep okay? We have a long practice tomorrow” Jinki told him and Jonghyun sighed as they muttered their goodnights to each other.

Jonghyun ignored the vibration of his phone in his pocket as he closed his eyes and drifted into his thoughts.