It had been a few days since our conversation in Jae Bum's bedroom. I had heard what he had said when I had told him that I wasn't interested in him. And his response never left my mind. "Too bad." I had tried to understand his words. But I couldn't.

 

        Jae Bum wasn't in love with me, it was impossible, we had never really liked each other. So why would he say that ? I tried to convince myself that he had pronounced these words because he would have liked me to be in love with him. It would have been easier for him to tease me within those circumstances.

         On the other hand, I had noticed a shift in his behavior. He was nice to me, would help me anytime, he looked after me. I was flattered by his attention. My head was full of doubts. I was wondering if Jae Bum loved me. He could be attracted to me.

 

          Those past days, my feelings had bothered me. The period of exams was getting closer and Jae Bum spent more time with Amy. She would either come to our apartment or he would go to her place. He was still nice, however, he didn't tease me when she was around. And it made me feel sad. Not that I wanted him to order me around, I just felt sad as he paid no attention to me.

          When he was out with her, I was annoyed. And I didn't know why. I tried to forget about this awkward feeling by studying. There were a lot of things to learn for the exams. My friends also helped me forget about Jae Bum and his charming tutor. They would often come to my place and we would try to work together. Today again, I was trying to understand a difficult subject as Na Yeon, Young Jae and Yu Gyeom worked on their own subjects.

 

"This is so hard !" Na Yeon cried as she closed her book.

"Don't give up Noona." Yu Gyeom said. "Take a break, it'll be easier afterwards."

"Yu Gyeom is right. I need a break too." Young Jae agreed.

 

          I glanced at their paperworks. They had been working hard while I had been thinking about Jae Bum. Again.

 

"If you want to drink something, help yourself." I said.

"Aren't you taking a break too ?" Young Jae asked.

"I can't." I replied.

"Let me help you Noona." Yu Gyeom proposed.

 

          He got closer while talking. Na Yeon and Young Jae went to the kitchen in need for a soft beverage. I closed my eyes as Yu Gyeom put his hands on my shoulders. He was very good at massages. The quietness of the moment was ruined by Jae Bum who opened the front door. His eyes analyzed the scene and he frowned when he saw Yu Gyeom's hands on my back. I caught a glimpse of jealousy on his face.

 

"Who are you ?"

"Hello, my name is Yu Gyeom. I'm Jin Ae's friend."

 

          Yu Gyeom stood up to introduce himself formally. Young Jae and Na Yeon came back to the lounge. They introduced themselves as well. Jae Beom said nothing but he was staring at me, I had already told my friends about our roommate. They knew who he was.

 

"Jin Ae, come with me." he requested.

"Why ?" I asked.

"Come with me, please." he pleaded.

 

          I looked at my friends and they all nodded. I left them alone in the lounge as I followed Jae Bum. He was walking towards his bedroom and I was embarrassed. We got inside. My heart skipped a beat when he locked the door. Then, he turned to me.

 

"I'm aware behaving like a woman is important to you." he started. "But it doesn't mean that you have to flirt with those guys."

"I wasn't flirting."

"He was touching you."

"He was giving me a massage." I corrected.

"He might think you'll let him do other things."

"Yu Gyeom is not like that. He's a good friend to me."

"Still, he's a man. You should be careful."

 

          I was angry. He wasn't supposed to tell me what to do. I was a grown-up and I could do whatever I wanted.

 

"If I want to be intimate with Yu Gyeom, it's my choice. You can't criticize it."

"Do you want to be more than his friend ?"

"It's none of your business."

"It is !" he grabbed my shoulders. "I don't like the way he touches you. I can't even do that myself. Why would you let someone else be so close to you.. It's driving me crazy. I've never felt like this before.. I can't take it Jin Ae. This is too hard."

"What are you talking about ?"

"I'm jealous. I'm so jealous. I want to be the one who is sweet to you." he revealed. "But you won't let me get close to you. I'm trying my best to be nice, and it seems like it has no effect on you. I tried to make you jealous.. but I failed."

"I.. I don't understand." I stuttered.

 

. . .

 

          A look of disbelief appeared on her face. But it was all true. My feelings were real. And it felt so good to tell her the truth.

 

"I'm jealous." I repeated.

"Why?"

"Your male friends are so close to you. They can touch you, kiss your cheek, go out with you, hug you.. I don't like it."

"I don't belong to you Jae Bum." she said.

"Exactly, and it is driving me crazy. I want you to be mine."

 

         She was speechless.

 

"Jin Ae, I've been nice to you for the past days. But our relationship didn't evolve. That's why I went out with Amy and I brought her home. I thought that you would be jealous." I took a deep breath. "I was wrong.. What should I do to make you love me ?"

"Can I go, please ?" she begged. "I'm not ready."

 

          A sigh left my mouth as I nodded. I was in pain when she unlocked the door and left me alone. I had tried my best to let her realize my feelings. I had not thought that she didn't want to see them. She had told me several times that she disliked me. Why would she care about my sweetness ? Why would she be jealous of Amy ?

          She wasn't. Because she wasn't in love with me.

 

          It had been three days since our conversation, I decided not to stick to her anymore. She had probably felt burdened before. During those days, we didn't talk to each other a lot. We didn't tease one another. Most of the times, we were silent. And when Jin Ae talked to me, she was always polite, as if she had been talking to a stranger. Jin Young noticed that something was wrong. After another silent meal, as Jin Ae left for school, he came to me.

 

"What's wrong with Jin Ae and you ?"

"Why.." I sighed.

"It's never been so peaceful. Usually, you like fighting over the side dishes."

"I know right.."

"Has something happened ?"

"She killed me."

"What ?" he asked.

"Do you remember when we used to say that she would kill me someday ?"

"Yes."

"Now, it's done."

"You had a fight ?"

"We don't fight anymore. That's the problem."

"I don't get it." he said.

"I think I'll look for another apartment."

"Hyung.. why ?"

"I'm in love with your sister, Jin Young." I revealed. "I love her."

"Gosh.. it was you.."

 

          Jin Young looked hesitant and we didn't speak for a moment, until he decided to tell me what was on his mind.

 

"I heard her talk to Na Yeon on the phone yesterday." he started. "She said that a boy has confessed to her. But she doesn't know how to react. Have you confessed to her ?"

"Kind of. What else did she say ?"

"That she feels weird when this guy is around, yet, she can't sort out her feelings."

"Do you think there might be a chance that she likes me ?"

"There's only one way to know about it." he smiled.

 

. . .

 

          Jin Young was waiting for me to come back from school. He was sitting on the couch with his arms crossed. I took off my jacket before sitting next to him.

 

"Oppa, are you angry ?"

"Well, I'm a little disappointed." he replied.

"Why ? Is it because of me ?"

"I just want to let you know that your wish will be granted."

"My wish ?" I repeated.

"Jae Bum is moving out. Actually, he's leaving Korea."

 

          My body's strength faded away and I had to sit back on the couch. I wasn't expecting that. Ever since he had told me about his feelings, our relationship had changed. We didn't spend much time teasing each other anymore. We talked about random things, and I always kept a distance.

          Actually, I had been trying to figure out my own feelings. I had been wondering how it would be to date someone like Jae Bum. I had asked myself if I wanted to date him, to be with him. I had no idea that my silence had hurt him to this point.

 

"Will he go to another country ?" I asked.

"Yes. Tonight will be his last night with us."

"But.. we can't afford the rent without a roommate, can we ?"

"We'll have to find someone else."

"Oppa, you should ask him not to move out." I pleaded. "It.. It'll be hard to find another roommate quickly. He shouldn't leave now !"

"Don't worry Jin Ae, I already know someone who can live with us."

"It's all because of me.." I mumbled.

 

          Jin Young stared at me as a tear rolled down my cheek.

 

"What's wrong ?"

"Where is he now ? I need to talk to Jae Bum !"

"Why ?"

"I need to tell him that I'm sorry." I cried. "He needs to know that I want to be with him. I also want him to be sweet to me. I want to date him."

"Don't cry Jin Ae, I hate it."

 

          My heart raced upon hearing this voice. It wasn't Jin Young. I recognized this intense voice. Jae Bum was standing next to the couch. He was smiling so sweetly. I glanced at Jin Young, wondering why Jae Bum was there. Indeed, I had thought he was out. He got closer to wipe the tear on my cheek and Jin Young decided to go to his bedroom.

 

"It was your brother's idea." he explained. "Don't cry, I'm not going anywhere."

"What-"

"I'll stay with you. I'll be your roommate as long as you want me to. And I'll also be your boyfriend."

"Jae Bum.. I'm so sorry."

 

          I didn't understand the situation. But it didn't matter. I was focused on the one in front of me. Jae Bum wasn't leaving. And he was giving me another chance. I wanted to be honest.

 

"I'm so sorry.. I shouldn't have left when you confessed to me." I apologized.

"I've forgotten about it already." he smiled. "I love you Jin Ae."

 

          He leaned closer and his nose touched mine. I was feeling so happy. It had been foolish to wait for so long. Jae Bum had been by my side, showing off his sincere love, and I had decided not to care about it. I had been confused by my own feelings.

 

"I'm sorry, it took me a while to realize that I'm in love with you."

"If you apologize again, I'll punish you." he giggled.

"How can I not ask for your forgiveness ? I've hurt you."

"It doesn't matter. I've been bad to you too."

"I'm sorry-"

 

          I was cut off by his tender lips. He had pressed them against mine. His kiss was sweet and gentle. He pecked my lips a few times, then, he cupped my cheeks and looked into my eyes.

 

"Is this the punishment ?" I asked.

 

          He nodded and a wonderful idea came to my mind. I leaned closer and said.

 

"I'm sorry."

 

          Jae Bum giggled before kissing me again.

 

"I'm sorry." I repeated.

 

          This time, he pulled me in for a passionate kiss. His tongue found mine. When he bit my upper lip, I felt hot. He was such a good kisser. My hands made their way to his chest. It was pleasurable to feel his muscular body. I started pushing him down and Jae Bum laid on the couch. His strong hands found my waist as he brought me closer. My chest was pressed against his and our kiss was deepening.

          Everything was perfect until our make-out session was ruined by my older brother.

 

"Wow ! I'm the one who will have to move out !"