6:18 AM

note: did the story change? nope, it's still the ol' one. i just gave it a bit of polishing and a brand-new title. enjoy the 5th chap!

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A lot of things has changed then.

Kim Junmyeon moved out of the student complexes of Chanyeol’s college—but that also meant that Baekhyun’s parents, who worked for the gang leader’s father’s company, were fired as a result of Chanyeol assaulting his son, leaving him with a permanent mark on his face. There weren’t much fuss about it—Mr. and Mrs. Byun had planned to find new jobs anyhow, and being the prideful bastard Junmyeon was, nobody filed anything to the police. That was sorted, and they never crossed paths since then.

Chanyeol shortly moved on to university within three years—nobody knew how, with him juggling three jobs and his assignments at the same time, but he did it. At his departure, he and his friends wasted themselves in their usual beloved club and Sehun provided them all with a few “lines” (in which Yixing passed out afterwards because alcohol and drugs weren’t a good mix and had them all pissing themselves in worry, but once he woke up, they all had a good solid laugh). When Chanyeol packed up his things in his dormitory, they all crowded in the room, making more noise than Junmyeon’s bikers will ever make, exchanging e-mails and phone numbers and alternative phone-numbers, wishing him luck.

With the help of the Byuns (to which Chanyeol expressed his gratitude for a whole hour, bowing his head repeatedly and blubbering as he said his thank-yous—but then again, it was typical of Chanyeol to cry, and they all simply patted his back and assured him that it was no big deal), they purchased a small apartment nearby to Chanyeol’s university and within distance to Baekhyun’s culinary school (he had pursued his childhood dream of being a chef). Baekhyun moved in with him shortly after and Chanyeol, if he could call his home with his lover heaven, then he did.

It was the sweet life Chanyeol had been pining for.

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The bed could never accommodate Chanyeol’s legs, but it didn’t really matter anymore. Chanyeol would lay curled up with Baekhyun in his arms, all of his four limbs clinging onto Baekhyun as if he was afraid to let him go, even in his sleep. Baekhyun didn’t mind too much—Chanyeol didn’t move in his slumber (matter fact, he slept like a rock) and the taller provided the warmth and comfort and closeness Baekhyun was always so fond of. They’ve slept, every night without fail, in that exact position for three years now, both of them at the age of twenty-four, and they were terribly in love with each other.

Baekhyun habitually wakes up first, yawning and stretching his limbs as far as Chanyeol’s vice-grip allows him to. This time, Baekhyun accidentally elbows him in the face and Chanyeol grumbles in his sleep, his eyes moving under his eyelids.

“Time to wake up, big lump.” Baekhyun prods his nose. Chanyeol simply grunts, still intent on sleeping, and Baekhyun sighs.

“We’ve got nothing today, haven’t we?” Baekhyun sifts through Chanyeol’s dark hair through his fingers, his head gently. Chanyeol subtly nods, his eyes still closed.

“What do you plan to do?” Baekhyun tutted. Chanyeol peeks an eye open, then another, adjusting himself to the light that filtered through the room before he closes them again, pulling Baekhyun closer to his bare chest.

“We can have .” Chanyeol murmurs sleepily.

“We can’t always have every time we’re free.” Baekhyun rolls his eyes. Chanyeol opens his eyes again, mumbling, cupping his face.

“Yes we can.” Chanyeol insists. “I’ll prove it to you.”

Baekhyun squeals when Chanyeol rolled on top of him, pinning the giggling smaller male down, Chanyeol giving him a sleepy grin. He leans down and they kissed, scrabbling off whatever article of clothing they put on last night before burying themselves under the sheets, hands on each other’s bodies, pulling themselves closer.

They made love to each other for the rest of the morning.

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Their daily schedule slotted perfectly into each other. They were mostly busy during the day—Baekhyun would cook him lunch and Chanyeol would go into uni for robotics and computer science, whilst Baekhyun would go off either attending his culinary school or working a part-time job in a bakery just down the road. There would always be time for them to be together in the evenings—either cuddled up on the couch to stream Chanyeol’s favorite dramas, trying out one of Baekhyun’s recipes or something else they’ve conjured up. It was the happiest life Chanyeol could ever wish for.

Of course, things could be better. But it was mostly trivial—like their apartment could be bigger. But for Chanyeol, who had a pretty eighteen years of his life that he’d like to forget altogether, it was more than perfect for him. He was at a full-time education, living with the love of his life and nobody was around to chase him or give him lashings with a belt anymore.

Though sometimes things weren’t easy for him. He was still paranoid and he often made measurements whether Baekhyun still loved him, asking him a million questions and asking for assurance whether he was worthy enough for Baekhyun to love. He still cried—crybaby Park Chanyeol never really shed off his skin—and he still found it somewhat difficult to express his emotions.

But that was life, wasn’t it? Nothing is ever a flat line. Chanyeol was willing to sacrifice a few flaws for the life he’d always dreamed of.

It gets unnerving sometimes for Chanyeol—because nothing is ever perfect. He was happy, of course—he had Byun Baekhyun and he wasn’t being hurt anymore. But it feels too perfect. Too happy. And it felt like something’s looming above Chanyeol’s head, waiting for the right time. It felt like something is going to fall on Chanyeol and when it happens, it’ll be messy all over again. In the twenty-four years Chanyeol has lived, it was always like that; he’d feel like the happiest man alive before something comes crushing down and he’d be in the bottom of the bog again, wondering when he’ll come up to the surface once more to repair the broken pieces of his heart.

He longs for it to happen, so he could get it done over and quickly with.

He didn’t want any more messy emotions.

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They were having one of their nights; Baekhyun bought steaks and he cooked it into perfection. Chanyeol had went out to the stores to buy liquor and they’d sit in the small dining room that also doubled as a kitchen, enjoying dinner with a glass or two of red wine. It was a time to catch up on whatever they’ve missed during the week.

It was a little like old times—except then, the steaks were biscuits and the red wine was raspberry-and-blackberry squash. Baekhyun would yap non-stop about whatever topic came to mind, talking and talking even if his mouth was full, and he only stopped when he paused to take a sip of his squash and even then he still continued talking, spraying crumbs all over the couch and his sweater. Chanyeol would simply sit quietly and take regular sips of his squash and nibbled on the edges of the biscuits; he cherished hearing Baekhyun’s voice, even if his words were all a jumble and Chanyeol seriously has no idea what the topic was about.

Now as adults, of course, Baekhyun didn’t exactly spray his chewed food everywhere and Chanyeol wasn’t a literal silent wall, but they still enjoyed this dynamic of interaction. Sometimes they’d even go past midnight, sipping wine and listening to Baekhyun almost rap about an annoying colleague in his school who was a total fool because he couldn’t get the pastry crumbs crispy enough.

“I saw Jongdae around campus.”

“No—really?”

“No, really.” Chanyeol nods, knifing through his steak. “Didn’t really surprise me, since he was majoring in engineering, but I never really thought he’d sort of move on quickly, you know? Even Sehun’s still struggling getting his Bachelor’s and since Jongdae sort of got off the wrong foot, I didn’t know he’d catch up quickly. I talked to him a few times and we had lunch, and he asked me about you and he told me about his… why are you looking at me like that?”

Chanyeol notices Baekhyun staring a little too long at him, as if he’s transfixed. Chanyeol begins to worry, scratching the back of his nape.

“D-Did I… Did I say something wrong?”

“No, it’s just—“ Baekhyun giggles, resting his chin on both hands. “You’re… talking so much.”

“S-Should I stop?”

“What? No, of course not, stop being such a worryguts. What I mean is—you used to be really quiet… and now you’re talking like the words just naturally comes out of your mouth and it’s just—“

Baekhyun smiles fondly. “I get that thing now, the thing you used to do. You’d listen to me like you were stupid. Now you’re talking and I just listen to your voice and it’s… it’s so… it’s so comforting, I—you know what I mean? It’s so lovely to hear you talk. It’s like I can just listen to your voice forever and ever and I’ll never get bored of it.”

Chanyeol’s blush spreads from his cheeks, then across his nose to the tip of his ears. Baekhyun cackles when Chanyeol tries to hide his embarrassment under his woolly jumper, hiding his face behind his hands. Chanyeol hadn’t noticed it until Baekhyun pointed it out—he was talking. The words gushed out of his mouth and he didn’t have to think about it. Though underneath it all, Chanyeol wanted to smile because what Baekhyun had said—it was endearing, and he’d hold it in his