Earlier the next day, Shownu thought it would be best to have a brainstorming/writing session for two more songs to round out the completion of their mini album. Everyone was spread out around the dorm, either humming melodies to themselves or finding themselves in a comfortable place with a notepad & pen. I.M fell into the latter category, thinking hard about what to write for his next rap. Taking a bit of a break, Jooheon came around the couch in front of I.M to see what he was working on.
"How's it coming along, bro? Made any progress?"
"Barely," he said sullenly. "I'm still stuck on this first part."
"Lemme see it. Maybe I can help."
I.M handed him the notepad, & when Jooheon caught sight of it, he frowned. Thinking I.M handed him the wrong side of the notepad, he flipped it over, resulting in a deeper frown. Turning through all the pages of the book, he tossed it back to him.
"There's nothing written on here."
"Ah... seriously? I could have sworn.. hey!"
The older boy quickly snatched the pen out of his hand, furiously scribbling the ink on the palm of his hand. He then his palm to I.M.
"The pen is working just fine! You've been sitting here for hours! What are you doing?"
I.M sighed. "I'm sorry, hyung. I know its not like me to do this."
"Damn right it's not. You're much more tactical than this."
I.M nodded, saying nothing in response; agreeing silently.
"Is something happening between you & Wonho?"
I.M was more alert now, feeling slightly clammy.
"Why do you ask?" he dodged the question by answering with another question.
"Look, it's none of my business, & I'll try to stay out of it if I can. But if something is going on, I'd rather it not be with him."
Now the clamminess was replaced with confusion.
"What? Is there something you know about that I don't?"
"It's just not a good idea."
"So you're saying I'm not his type? Or maybe you're suggesting I don't get involved with anyone in general so that I can focus more on my work?"
"I don't care what you do in your free time. Be with whoever. Just not him."
I.M shook his head, rubbing his temples. "I'm not following."
"Look, Wonho's been with so many people-"
"& so what if I have? Is that such a bad thing? Are you painting me out to be some kind of ?" Wonho (much less revealing than yesterday) appeared just then, placing his arms across his chest defensively. "I'm just experienced. The reason we live is to experience things, right?" He then hopped over the couch to sit next to I.M, leaving no space between them.
"Am I making you uncomfortable?" he asked, in a smooth, buttery voice. I.M shook his head nervously, resulting in Wonho giving Jooheon a smug look.
"See? The baby has a mind of his own, & clearly his opinion of me isn't bad at all. So I'd appreciate it if you'd stop putting things in his head & let him form his own opinion." Putting an arm around "the baby", Wonho smirked, watching Jooheon just shake his head & walk away. Stretching his head a bit to make sure he was gone, he swiftly took his arm away from him, all the coy & playfulness gone from his demeanor.
"So what's this all about? I didn't really catch the beginning of the conversation."
I.M leaned back to stare at him with wide eyes.
"If you didn't catch the beginning, then why bother butting in? He wasn't saying anything bad."
"Yeah, but it sounded like a warning. Like he was trying to keep us away from each other.." he his chin thoughtfully.
"Yeah, that did seem like his main goal.. but at first it was just because I hadn't written anything for either song yet, & probably assumed that you were the one distracting me."
"That makes no sense. How did I come into all of this?" he lay his head on I.M's lap, & to his disappointment, I.M had no cute reaction awaiting him.
"Is my charm really wearing off..?"
"Huh?"
"Nothing.." Wonho closed his eyes, as I.M absentmindedly played with his hair.
"You know what?"
"Hm?"
"What if he's jealous?"
"Pfft."
Wonho sat up now.
"No really. What if he wants you for himself?"
"Uh, more like he wants you for himself."
They both sat back & pondered this.
"It could go both ways, really."
"Doubt it. You're the more attractive one."
"Yeah, but he's closer with you, with you both being rappers & all."
"That doesn't mean anything. I promise you, he doesn't see me in that way."
Wonho frowned.
"Why so hard on yourself?"
"I could ask you the same thing."
He did have a point.
Getting up, he placed I.M's notepad back in his hands. "Get to work. You're the one who's most behind. & when I say most behind, I mean hasn't started at all."
I.M looked at the blank pages, also drawing a blank in his mind. He then felt the touch of cold fingers on his chin, as his whole head shifted up.
"Hey. Am I really that distracting to you..?" his once ocean blue eyes were now replaced with icy silver ones, & it faintly reminded I.M of snow.
Taking his silence as a yes, Wonho smiled, offering some advice.
"Instead of allowing me to become a distraction, let me be your inspiration instead."
"So you.. want me to write lyrics about you?"
"Not about me. Inspired by me." He let go of his chin to go back to practicing melodies with the other vocalists.
"Oh & dont forget to change the lyrics to a girl instead of a boy." One playful wink, & he was off.

I don’t need love.
I just wanna get you. I’m obsessed.
All the other girls are rocks, I can’t see them.
Oh god, but you’re a sculpture.
I’m losing my mind but you’re still bright.
I wanna look somewhere else, but you steal my eyes. I want to hide you.
I’m running out of breath. & it's because of you.

"Whoaaaaa." Minhyuk looked pleased, as he read I.M's lyrics aloud. When they finally got to his part in the song, everyone looked worried since they knew he was having a bit of writers block, but in the end he pulled it off nicely.
"What does the english part mean?" Hyungwon asked, as I.M translated it in their native language.
"So maybe it was good that I.M was the last one to finish after all. This is the perfect way to end the song."
"No no no," Kihyun stopped the white-haired boy, reaching over him to point at the piece of paper. "His part should be in the middle, right after Jooheon's."
As they all started discussing more about the line placement, I.M excused himself into the hallway. Wonho followed him with his eyes, then followed with his feet. Still full of concerns, Jooheon did his best to ignore them.
"Hey!" Wonho dashed after him, & as soon as he caught up, he casually leaned up against the wall. I.M gave a small wave, before ducking into the water fountain to take a sip.
"Your lyrics were amazing."
"You think so?"
"Were they about me?"
"No. Only inspired by you."
Wonho didn't look the least bit amused.
"What? Hyung, you told me not to-"
"& you took me seriously?"
Understanding then washed over I.M's face. "So you were only teasing me again?"
Moving closer, Wonho deflected his question with one of his own. "So, you think I'm a sculpture..?"
I.M gave him a big smile. "My own work of art. By the way? I'm really glad you decided to wear that shirt today."
Wonho looked down at his tight fitted low cut v neck, then looked back at the maknae, scrunching his face up.
"What? What did I say?"
"When I told you to be more honest, I didn't mean say EVERY little thing on your mind. It ruins the mood. I'm ok with just things like "you're y" or "I'm obsessed with you."
Now I.M was the one who's face was scrunching up. "Huh? When did I ever say anything like that last part?"
"Your lyrics?"
"Oh. That part I made up."
Smacking his teeth, Wonho hit the wall. "Yeah, right! I see the way you look at me."
"Hyung.. you're acting a bit egotistical.."
"If I'm wanting you to be honest with me, I too have to show my real self. So, does this side of me bother you?"
"No, not really. I mean I knew you were this way to some extent by how much time I've noticed you spend in the mirror & such."
"That's different. That's just me worrying if I look good enough."
"Hyung. You always look good." I.M stepped closer to him now, hesitantly wrapping his arms around his waist.
"Changkyun. You're shaking."
Hearing his real name again made him shake even more.
"W-who's fault is that?" he buried his face in Wonho's chest out of embarrassment. In response, Wonho put his strong arms around his entire body.
"You dont have to force yourself to do these things."
"I have to, if I wanna learn how to be more comfortable with it."
"So I do make you uncomfortable.."
Burying his head even more, I.M replied, but it came out muffled & inaudible. Wonho rolled his eyes.
"I can't hear you, dumb dumb."
He pushed himself away from him.
"I said you don't make me uncomfortable, I'm just not used to doing these things, let alone with a guy or a member of my own group."
"But why should that bother you?"
"No, I'm not bothered! I don't mind!"
Wonho looked away, annoyed, & I.M felt guilty. "I really dont mind! Wonho!"
"Alright alright" he put his hand in the air, signaling for him to stop talking. "I'm sort of an impatient person. I know these things take time, but I want you right now. & I want our first time to be tonight."
I.M grabbed on to the wall to support his body from nearly collapsing. Did he hear that right?
"I can't."
A deathly stare was then shot at the maknae.
"Come again?"
"Listen, I know you wont budge on this, but I really need you to hear me out this time. There's no need to rush into it &-"
"Are you scared?"
"Yes..?" I.M frowned. "Who wouldn't be? I mean it's not like I don't want to. But it would be my first time &-"
Once again, I.M got interrupted by his hyung, reaching out to hold the younger boy's hand. They locked fingers, & he could feel the metal of Wonho's ring pressed against his skin.
"We can go slow. I won't hurt you. I would never do that. I just want to feel what it's like to be inside of you.." backing him up against a wall, Wonho seductively leaned in for a kiss. At that moment, I.M couldn't feel his legs & without warning, he broke the kiss & sunk to the ground.
"What the-? Get up! Are you kidding me?"
The pace of I.M's breathing began to speed up, & Wonho dropped down to the floor as well, on his knees.
"Don't tell me you're having some sort of anxiety attack."
I.M scowled. "Well thanks for your concern."
"I am concerned. But freaking out on a person that's freaking out doesnt really help much, now does it?"
Biting his lip, I.M put his head in his hands.
"Just count to ten or something."
"You're really pissing me off." he growled, choosing to use english instead of something Wonho could explicitly understand.
"Now look who's moody."
"You made me this way."
"I just wanted to . To be honest."
I.M's anger washed away, head cleared of all the bad thoughts now. New images appeared in his mind, & he was calm again.
"I still can't do it."
In that moment, it appeared as if their moods had switched, now teleporting his frustration & annoyance onto Wonho instead. Seeing this, I.M decided to speak carefully, as to not make things worse.
"Can we talk about our relationship in general? I mean, what is this? What are we.?"
Wonho now sat criss-crossed, putting his chin in the palm of one of his hands. "Well I'm ," he responded, being blunt once again.
I.M rolled his eyes. "No kidding."
"Don't you want me?" He looked sad now, not being able to look I.M in the eyes.
He looked at the older boy in amazement. "You really are something! This is going to be a bit difficult for me to handle.." speaking mostly to himself, I.M his chin, getting lost in his own thoughts.
"What do you mean?"
"This!" he lunged both hands out in front of Wonho. "Your mood swings! How have I never noticed this before?"
"Because I haven't shown it to you at this extent before. No one else knows I'm this moody. I don't show this side to anyone unless I really like them. & I told you we're being honest & open now. So like I said, this is the real me, & if you dont like it-"
"Shhh" I.M shut his eyes really tight. "I like it. In fact, there's nothing I don't like about you, hyung. I'm just trying to figure out my position in all this. I'm not sure of my role here."
Wonho broke into a grin. "Well I'm a top, of course."
"You say 'of course', but when you get all moody like that, you don't really act like a top."
"Oh really? & how exactly should a top act?"
"I just imagine them having better control over their emotions. Like, I feel as if I should keep you in line but at the same time you're my hyung, so I don't know what to do there.."
Hearing footsteps, Wonho turned around & found that Jooheon had came out into the hallway. He stood up slowly, reaching out to give a hand to help I.M up. He took his arm silently, & unexpectedly felt the same arm slide around his shoulder.
"Whatever you have to say, I really don't wanna hear it."
The blond's comment shocked both the rappers as they stayed silent, trying to figure out how they should respond.
Finally, Jooheon spoke up.
"I'm not an idiot. Whatever this is, should stop."
"& for what? We're not hurting anybody! So why does this concern you? Are you mad that I got to him first?"
Jooheon rolled his eyes, uninterested in starting a fight. "I don't care about having him to myself. Not when I already had him before you to begin with."
If he didn't want a fight, it looks like he would get one anyway.
I.M tensed up a bit, afraid of how Wonho would react. But slowly, second by second, the tension passed, as he realized Wonho wasn't doing anything at all. He simply nodded & asked "When did this happen?"
"During Rush promotions."
"Then how did I not know about it?"
"We were good at hiding it. & also maybe because you were too stuck up in your own to realize anything else going on around you except for yourself."
The venom in Jooheon's words dripped inside Wonho's ears; clogging them until he couldn't hear anything else anymore. The roaring of the air conditioner. The music coming from the practice room. All muted. & then it all slowly became clear again.
Raising a fist, he took a step closer to the bronze haired boy, as I.M struggled to keep him from going even an inch closer.
"Hyung, calm down!" I.M shouted, worrying about his own strength holding up against Wonho's. He was holding him from behind, but his grip was beginning to grow weaker. The hall was just filled with growling sounds from the blond, ranging from loud & painful to deep & aggressive. The music had stopped in the other room, now allowing the other members to hear what was taking place in the hallway.
"What is that?" Minhyuk wondered, curious as ever. The others looked around, being too involved into the song preparations to notice three members had gone missing.
"Whoa where did they-" Hyungwon's question got cut short, as he watched the others waste no time running into the hall. There, they found three boys: one just standing with his arms on his hips, looking uninterested; another holding back what looked like a wild animal trying to escape from his cage. & then there was said wild animal. Shownu quickly ran by I.M's side to help hold Wonho back.
"Hyung, what are you doing? Why dont you run away?" I.M asked Jooheon, really not wanting to see either of them get hurt.
"He wont do anything," Jooheon said confidently.
"Don't be so sure!" Wonho's attempts to break free grew stronger & more frantic, as the metal loop on his collar dangled every which way; his bangs swaying back & forth in front of his face.
Kihyun groaned, wishing he didn't have to deal with things like this.
"Everyone take a time out!"
When no one seemed to be listening, he smacked Wonho on the head with a rolled-up booklet that appeared to be their song lyric sheet.
"I said stop it!"
Wonho's growls turned into low rumbles, then cut off completely. Kihyun was the only one to completely calm Wonho down during this entire thing.
"You gotta teach me that.." I.M muttered, still holding on to Wonho's waist, even as Shownu let go.
"I shouldn't have to. Because this won't happen again, right?" he looked at Wonho now with warning eyes, & Wonho only allowed one of his eyebrows to raise in response.
"Right?"
Met yet again without an answer, Kihyun hit him on the head once more with the booklet. Despite all this, Wonho still stayed mute.
"Do you really wanna stay out here all night?"
"No," Wonho looked a little devious now. "I just like to see you get angry."
Before he could see Kihyun blush, the papers he had in his hand once again met the hairs of Wonho's head, giving him what he wanted. Wonho smirked as he watched Shownu take the booklet from him. He stepped in front of Kihyun, & he was totally invisible now, blocked by the leader's height.
"This is serious," Shownu warned, & it was probably the first time any of them had heard him speak all day.
"Why are you acting like I started this?"
Kihyun peaked out behind Shownu, only his upper body in view.
"Whether you started it or not, you were the only one we saw reacting in a potentially harmful way! We're not pointing the blame on anyone, but your emotions always get the best of you, Wonho!"
That part alerted I.M a little bit. Earlier before this all started, Wonho had told him that no other person truly knew about his severe moodiness unless he really liked that person & allowed them to see it. So how did Kihyun know, unless..?
He let go of Wonho finally & took a step back to look at both of the arguing boys' expressions. One was the playful but smug, teasing expression that he knew so well. The other was frustrated, but could see an underlying admiration for the other, on top of a cherry red blush resting upon his cheeks.
He knew immediately what this was. They, too, had had something going on previously, just like him & Jooheon.
"Should we call it a night?" Hyungwon spoke up, once he was sure that the tension had fizzled.
"Ah, but we were making so much progress!" Minhyuk stamped around in disappointment.
"Well, how can we work like this? A good night's sleep will probably clear everyone's heads, & by tomorrow we can start fresh & get more things done."
Minhyuk looked at the taller boy in astonishment. "Wow, all you really think about is sleep, huh."
They both giggled, playfully pushing each other & making their way to the elevators.
Kihyun drew in a breath, having not looked away from Wonho this entire time. Shownu took notice of this, grabbing Kihyun by the waist & silently leading him to the elevator doors. By his actions, I.M was almost certain that Shownu knew about their past history as well. Jooheon soon followed, & the last two figured it would be best if they took a separate elevator.
I.M turned to him now. "What were you thinking, hyung?"
Wonho looked at him with wild eyes.
"Me? Did you hear the things that he said? It was uncalled for!"
"Yeah? I can think of another thing that was uncalled for.." he huffed under his breath.
"Like you & Jooheon's relationship?"
His heart jumped, forgetting that that had also been mentioned earlier.
"That was nothing.."
Wonho chuckled darkly. "Oh, yeah? Can't wait for our relationship to turn out to be simply referred to as 'nothing' as well."
"Hyung, listen!"
"No you listen." He backed I.M into a corner, & I.M couldn't help but wonder if he felt more power by doing this.
"Earlier you said that Jooheon couldn't possibly be thinking of you in that way. Turns out he already has."
"That was just-"
"It was just what? Not to mention you also said you hadn't ever done anything with a guy, let alone a member of this group. Was that a lie?"
I.M scratched his head. "That was just something that we were experimenting with. It wasn't serious. We grew closer when he confided in me about him feeling a certain way towards men. I told him I had similar feelings, & it just went from there. But it didn't last long because we realized we weren't what the other one wanted. We never kissed or did as much as you & I have done, & that's not saying much cause we haven't exactly done much either. So there's your explanation. Happy now?"
Wonho stared blankly. "No. How am I supposed to be ok with all of this?"
"Wonho, you have exes too! But they have nothing to do with us right now, going forward."
Not really listening, Wonho had another idea.
"I think he still wants you."
"& I think that's bull."
"You've been wrong before. What other reason would he have for constantly intervening, even after he says he doesn't really care or want to get involved? Wake up! He's not doing this for your benefit. He's doing it for his own." Backing away now, Wonho started for the elevator. "& you're sleeping in my room tonight."
"Wait a minute," I.M's protest involuntarily came out in english, as he watched Wonho push the button on the elevator.
"What?" he answered back, also in english, with a smirk.
"Promise me you won't do anything. I'm not ready."
"All I'm hearing that as is 'I don't want you'"
The elevator slid open, as they both took a step inside.
"But I do! You know I do.."
"Do I? Then show me."
The doors slid closed. It was a silent ride, until Wonho decided to speak up again, sighing.
"I'm asking you to sleep in my room tonight not because of my ual desires, but to put me at ease."
The doors opened again, as they appeared in front of the door to their dorm.
"Put you at ease for what?"
Another one of Wonho's sighs met up with I.M's ears.
"You share a room with Jooheon. I think that needs to change."
I.M blinked. "You mean permanently?"
"As much as I would love that, no. Just until I feel comfortable with all of this again."
"So never."
Wonho gave a faint smile.
"He's been your roommate since the beginning! I'm not that heartless. I don't want to keep him from you, I just need a few days to get over everything that happened today."
Now it was I.M's turn to sigh, absentmindedly playing with the two piercings on Wonho's left ear.
"Jooheon's gonna have a cow."
"Jooheon can go himself. You're mine, not his."
I.M blushed. "So does this mean we really are a thing now?"
Placing his hands on the maknae's waist, he leaned in for a soft, feathery kiss.
"Yes, if it's what you want. But I have to warn you that it won't be easy. Even I can admit that I can be a handful sometimes. But I'll try to make this easier for you."
"J-just be yourself, hyung.. I'll figure the rest out later." he the blond's hair, & the blond went in for an even more passionate kiss that lasted around half a minute.
Letting go for air, Wonho wiped his mouth, smiling.
"Sure we can't do anything tonight?"
I.M saw the eager look in his eyes & couldn't help but compromise.
"Maybe just fooling around.. but not all the way! Ah-" gripping I.M's wrist, Wonho rushed in the doom & led him to the bedroom. That was all he needed to hear.