It started with a kiss.

 

He was aware for a long time that his husband had been cheating on him, but he refused to believe it until he saw it in his very eyes. The text messages and images he found on his husband’s phone weren’t real, the coming home past midnight with the scent of another man on him and hickeys across his neck were his imagination.

It wasn’t until he actually saw his husband locking lips with another man he realised that he had to accept it and he had to make actions. It was an ordinary Tuesday morning, and Minseok thought he’d surprise Lu Han at work with a homemade lunch. The romance in their marriage had gone downhill since Minseok fell pregnant and he assumed it was because of all the stress Lu Han had at work trying to provide for their little family. He would have never guessed Lu Han to be a cheat, but also a liar. The years they spent in love seem like a waste to him now, but if it wasn’t for Lu Han he wouldn’t have his beautiful four month old son, Kyungsoo.

Kyungsoo is the reason why Minseok stayed around and continued to play happy families with the man who cheats behind his back, he’s the reason why Minseok still lets Lu Han cuddle him at night and kiss him with another man on his mind. If it wasn’t for Kyungsoo, Minseok would be worse off.

The moment he saw Lu Han’s lips on another mans, he almost dropped the lunch. He didn’t want to make a scene in front of his sleeping baby in his arm, or cause Lu Han’s co workers any stress; so he left silently – tears streaming down his face on the drive home.

What could he do? Wait for him to come home and confront him? Scream at him and break apart in front of him?

No. Minseok was stronger than that. He won’t let Lu Han see him like this. He won’t fall apart for Kyungsoo. He needs to be strong for his son. Memories of their relationship flashed before his eyes, their first date, the first time they made love, their wedding day, the birth of their son. He pulled up by a lay by so he wouldn’t cause a crash from his tears blurring his sight. He spent a few minutes taking some deep breathes, drying his tears and blowing his nose. He glanced in the mirror and saw his little boy sleeping soundly, fat cheeks softly around his pacifier. He inhaled deeply, what could he do now? Lu Han would be coming home in 5 hours and he needed to figure out a plan.

He could stay, pretend nothing happened and spend the rest of his life unhappy and with a man who doesn’t appreciate him. But isn’t that what he’s been doing these past 5 years?

And what about his son? He deserves to have a good life, without his parents arguing or lying and cheating. He deserves to grow up happy and with a loving family around him. Minseok can’t even provide that. His head is a swimming mess, his mother was right about Lu Han all along.

 

“Get your ing head together Minseok.” He whispers to himself, tapping the steering wheel. He’s let Lu Han walk all over him far too long. It’s time he finally stood his ground and made a change in his life for once instead of always putting his husband first.

Sniffling, he puts his car in gear and heads home. A worried yet relieved expression on his face. “Babysoo, I’m sorry but we have to leave home. One day, you will understand why.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And he left.

It took him around two hours to pack his car up with as much stuff as he could from clothes to baby essentials and diapers. He couldn’t squeeze Kyungsoo’s crib in so settled on his fold up travel crib and would have to buy a new one for him when he had the money. He didn’t have a plan, he had no money as they lived off Lu Han’s and he stopped working after he fell pregnant to take care of the baby and be a housewife. After he had everything packed and ready in the car, Minseok spent a few moments in the house wondering if this was all a mistake leaving him. If he was being selfish taking his son away from his father. Staring at their wedding picture, he could see how unhappy Lu Han was.

He knew deep down for a while that Lu Han had fallen out of love with him, or did he ever love him at all? Was it only lust he had for him, or was he too scared to leave?

He knew that Lu Han stopped looking at him the same way after he gave birth, Minseok assumed it was the extra weight he put on. After Kyungsoo was born, Lu Han was different. He hardly spent time with the baby and never wanted to feed or change him. He always made an excuse as to why he couldn’t attend to their crying baby at 4am.

Minseok just assumed he was tired.

He placed the photograph back on the shelf and gently picked up his sleeping baby off the sofa. In a few hours he’ll be awake crying for milk so he wanted to leave as soon as he could so he wouldn’t be pulling over on the highway to feed his son.

The house is painted in memories, from the walls full of photographs and the meals they shared together at the large kitchen table. Part of Minseok is already regretting what he’s about to do, he knows that taking Lu Han’s son away from him is cruel and the wrong thing to do… But it’s the only thing he feels like he can do. He didn’t bother leaving a note, but he’ll take his phone in case Lu Han actually does call. He won’t be surprised if he doesn’t.

 

 

 

 

 

Minseok’s been driving for 40 minutes wondering where the hell he’s going. The city is large, filled with many opportunities but not the right place for a now single father with his baby. He thought several times about going to his parents house, but he doesn’t want them to constantly remind him that they were right. He wants to do this on his own, without any help.

He pulls in at the nearest food stop to think about his destination. He’s always loved the ocean, so why not go there? Tapping his head, he thinks of all his options. Kyungsoo starts to slightly whine in his sleep, Minseok quickly unbuckles his seatbelt and leans over to shush his baby back to sleep. “A little longer baby. We’ll be there soon.”

He decides that he’ll head to the countryside and stay at the cheapest hotel he can find and make a better decision tomorrow when his head is clearer. He’s been driving around too long already and cried enough tears to drown himself in.

He drives carefully, hoping that Kyungsoo will continue to sleep for the rest of the journey.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Minseok comes across a tiny village in the middle of nowhere, it’s surrounded by rice fields and most of the houses are hanok. It reminds him of his grandparents when he use to spend the summer at theirs. He decides that they’ll spend the night there as he’s pretty emotionally exhausted and Kyungsoo is already screaming his head off in the backseat. Before he steps out the car, he checks his phone and feels his stomach drop seeing that Lu Han didn’t even call or text him. He would be home by now and seen the house half empty.

He grabs his wallet and jumps out the car, running round to the other side to get his crying son out. As soon as Minseok places Kyungsoo on his chest and holds him snugly, he stops wailing – eyes alert of his surroundings and calms down in his fathers warmth.

A tiny elderly woman exists her store, walking stick in one hand making her way to Minseok. “Are you looking for a place to stay?” She croaks, the years of smoking completely ruining her voice as well as her lungs.

“Just for tonight, for me and my son.” Minseok replies, rubbing Kyungsoo’s back. He feels a little uncomfortable with the elderly woman stare at him from head to toe with one eye – the other he assumes is a glass eye.

“I’ve only got a small room available, but I don’t have a crib.” She replies, using her walking stick to point in the direction of a scatter of Hanok in the short distance.

“That’s okay, he usually sleeps in the bed with me anyway. How much is it?”

The room is cheaper than staying in a hotel in the city and Minseok is thankful that she even offered to make him some dinner for the evening. Although the room is cramped with a futon on the floor and nothing else, he’s more than happy to lay down and feed Kyungsoo. The sun in starting to set and the summer heat is cooling down. After he’s finished feeing his son, he changing his diaper and puts on a different onesie – this one a soft yellow with a tiny acorn print. He changes his own clothes into some loose shorts and a large t shirt. Minseok realises its one of Lu Han’s that he likes to wear to bed. Thankfully, he’s worn it so many times that the scent of Lu Han no longer lingers in the fabric.

The crickets are louder in the countryside, but the air feels cleaner in his lungs. He decides to take a little walk around the small village with Kyungsoo wrapped in his podaegi resting comfortably on his back. By the look of the houses and people, Minseok realises that they are not the richest. Living off what they can grow on farms and collect water from a well gave him a little shock as he’s always lived so comfortably at home surrounded by many luxuries.

By the time the sun has fully set, Minseok gazes in awe at the sky. He’s never seen so many stars at once, clusters of tiny galaxies watching down on him and his child. He finds a seat on a bench nearby, taking out his phone for the seventh time that day to check if Lu Han had called.

Nothing. Not a single text. It made him wonder. Was Lu Han glad that he left? Was he not concerned about the whereabouts of where his child was? He started to regret not leaving a letter, a note, anything to tell him goodbye. Right now his heads a mess, it’s been a long and emotional day – tomorrow will be kinder and he knows that eventually he’ll see that he did the right thing. He never thought he’d leave Lu Han. Never in a million years. He fell so hard and fast for him, and let him take so much of him away slowly.

“Kyungsoo, do you think appa did the right thing?” He sighs, getting nothing but a gurgle back from his son. He giggles lightly, his heart feeling heavy for the first laughter that’s escaped his mouth today. “Time to put you down to bed sweetheart.” He got up and walked back to the Hanok to get Kyungsoo settled for the night.

Unfortunately Kyungsoo cried the entire night, leaving Minseok exhausted but crying with his son until the sun rose up. Minseok cried and cried until his chest felt bruised, until he felt the lump in his throat sell up so much it hurt to breathe. He cried for his son, because of his failed marriage and for Lu Han.

“What have I done?”

“Kyungsoo… Please forgive me.”

“Appa loves you so much.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Minseok slept in late, sprawled out on the floor with his son in the exact same position, pacifier hanging halfway out his mouth and his little belly poking through the bottom of his pyjama top. Minseok probably slept about 2 hours in total, he can’t remember the last time Kyungsoo was so difficult in the night. Rolling over to grab his phone, the screen shows no notification whatsoever.

He wonders if Lu Han even went home last night.

Minseok decides that he’ll get a few more hours sleep since Kyungsoo is happily snoozing next to him, he’ll need the energy to get him through the day.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A sharp high pitched cry had Minseok jolting awake from his nightmare, he dreamt of Lu Han’s face – angry and disgusted with him. He rubbed his eyes and quickly soothed his crying son who has his fists in a ball with frustration, crying out to be fed. “Well good morning grumpy.” He chuckled at his sons frown and little pout which soon faded away once he was gulping down his morning milk.

Minseok lay down and played with Kyungsoo’s feet while he fed him, Kyungsoo can be a slow feeder so he may as well make himself comfortable. Every morning Minseok likes to help Kyungsoo practice with holding onto toys, he watches as his son brings his stuffed rabbit closer to his face so he can inspect it easier. He grasps onto the bunnies ear, and managing to stretch out his index finger to touch the bead eyes. “You’re so cleaver, my little babysoo.” Minseok coo’s and kisses his tiny forehead, the amount of mornings he’s spent doing this and Lu Han never paid any attention to their baby growing stronger. In a few more months Kyungsoo will be able to sit upright by himself and try to crawl and Lu Han won’t be there to witness it.

“I guess it’s better to have one parent that cares about you than another that doesn’t.”

 

 

 

Minseok changed Kyungsoo into a dry diaper and some overalls to wear for the day, his hair was longer than most babies Minseok’s seen and he thought that Kyungsoo looked adorable when he tied his hair into an apple ponytail. After Minseok changed into some clean clothes and washed his face, he carried Kyungsoo and took him outside to grab something to eat from the local shop.

He settled on some Gimbap and a bottle of water to feed his grumbling stomach and sat on a bench with Kyungsoo on his lap as he ate in peace. He pulled out his phone after he was finished eating and started to search for nearby towns and work. Minseok was starting to wish that he planned out his escape a little better instead of having no idea what to do.

From spending a few hours searching the internet, it didn’t help that the service was absolutely terrible but he eventually found a town not far. He figured a place bigger than this tiny village would have more job opportunities and an affordable apartment.

He walked back to the Hanok and packed away all of their belongings, after he filled his car back up and put Kyungsoo in his baby seat he took the key back to the elderly lady and thanked her for having him stay overnight. Kyungsoo was starting to nod off by the time Minseok was starting up his car and setting up his google maps to the right direction.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It was a short drive to the next town and Minseok felt comfortable in the new place. The buildings had a mix of modern and traditional, he noted a school and a park for Kyungsoo to go to when he’s older. He found a parking space by a store and pulled up, his plan was to ask around for work and see if he could rent an apartment at the cheapest price he could get. He got Kyungsoo out of his seat, who whined and woke himself up – large eyes taking in his new surroundings. “Sorry to wake you baby, go back to sleep.” Minseok hushed and bounced his baby lightly. He decided to take a walk around, rubbing Kyungsoo’s back as he did. For a small town they had everything he needed, a few stores, restaurants and bakery’s, in the short distance he noted some rice and fruit fields.

Minseok had no idea where to go, or who to speak to. With a winey baby in his arm and a confused expression on his face – he decided to go to the store and see if anyone could help him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Luck came his way, and he was pointed in the direction of work and a tiny apartment. He found a job working on the rice fields and would be picking rice and other fruits in the blazing sun from 5am till 4pm. Minseok had to beg to let him bring Kyungsoo to work with him, even if it meant carrying him on his back the whole time he worked. He couldn’t afford to take him to nursery. He didn’t care how hard it would be or how hot, as long as he kept Kyungsoo covered from the sun and he could support him with food and a warm bed to sleep in at night then he didn’t care how exhausting the job is.

He managed to find a tiny old apartment up for rent at a decent price. It had one bedroom, with a tiny bathroom. It was set out more of a studio apartment but Minseok thinks that adding a bit of paint and a few furnishings here and there, he could make it quiet cosy for him and Kyungsoo. After paying his deposit and getting the keys, he spent the whole day moving the bags of clothes and baby essentials into the apartment – as well as cleaning everything so Kyungsoo didn’t fall sick.

Luckily the apartment came with furniture, which saved Minseok a bomb. He took Kyungsoo out in his stroller to a nearby daiso and bought a bunch of cushions, plants, blankets and lamps to make their new home brighter. “Kyungsoo baby, our house is going to look so cute. Appa is going to buy you some new toys too.” He coos at his baby who’s on his fingers and looking around the store with curious, wide eyes.

Minseok places a few teething toys in the basket and a new duvet set for the bedroom. There’s enough room to squeeze Kyungsoo’s crib in the corner but the baby always sleeps better in bed with Minseok nestled beside his chest. After he paid for all their essentials, he went to the grocery store and bought a small bag full of vegetables and some meat so he could make himself something to eat for the evening.

By the time it was 8pm, Minseok was so exhausted his eyes where drooping. It had been a long and tiring day and he knows he can’t even rest in the morning as he has to start work at 5am. He puts his sleeping son on his bed, on the left side against the wall so he doesn’t roll off and falls out of bed. Minseok quickly lines pillows around Kyungsoo’s frame too just in case. Sleep took over him fast, and Minseok’s last thoughts where of his husband.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The first week of work was hard, the heat and constantly bending down while carrying Kyungsoo made it even more difficult. He wish he had to money to take him to nursery or have a nanny take care of him, he decided that with his pay check he’ll try and get something sorted. It isn’t fair on the baby to be pressed against Minseok’s back all day with no toys or attention. The only time Minseok interacted with him was when he was hungry or needed his diaper changed.

Although a few times he set up Kyungsoo’s bouncer under a tree and Kyungsoo was happy to bounce around and play with the toys that hung above his body and watched his Appa work. Sometimes the farmers wife came out to sit and look after Kyungsoo and made him formula milk so she could help feed him.

After four weeks, Minseok was getting use to the early mornings and the heat. Each rice he plucked was just a reminder to him of why he left Lu Han. He plucked and plucked just like all the petals Lu Han plucked out of their marriage. For the whole 5 weeks since Minseok left, he never heard from him. No call, no text. He came to thought, was Lu Han glad that he left?

Was Minseok doing them a favour by leaving so Lu Han didn’t have to continue to sneak around? Did Lu Han not care that his only child was gone? The thought made him sad, who could not love his gorgeous little Kyungsoo?

But out of the whole five weeks, Minseok never cried. He never once cried over Lu Han. He didn’t see the point in wasting his tears, although the hollow emptiness inside him felt like it was getting bigger and bigger – he didn’t let it irrupt inside him.

Minseok had no idea what he was actually doing, he wasn’t sure if he was going to stay working on the farm forever. He just needed to ground himself for a little while.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Minseok was sure that things would get easier, but the more he worked hard and bought his son up the harder it seemed to get over Lu Han. He wasn’t even sure if he should file for a divorce or wait for Lu Han to file one against him. He secretly wished that Lu Han would leave a message, asking where he was, how was his son, an apology – but he got nothing for 5 weeks.

Kyungsoo was quickly growing up, he’s starting to smile now and his cheeks rise up into little cotton balls every time Minseok tickles him and plays with him. Minseok wonders if Kyungsoo was to see Lu Han now, would he recognise him? Kyungsoo’s eye sight still hasn’t fully developed but Minseok’s certain that his son is clever as he recognises his favourite toys and Minseok’s soft voice.

Work was something he just had to get used to, in the winter he’ll no longer be needed and will have to find somewhere else to work during the cold seasons. The farmer and his wife never asked about Minseok’s past, and if anyone did ask he’d simple reply that he had always been a single parent and carried and bought up Kyungsoo on his own. Most of the time people felt sorry for him, but he could see that they also thought little of him – and assumed that he was just an idiot for getting pregnant in the first place.

 

But Minseok never let it bother him, he went from living a simple and easy life to a difficult life. The difference in was that Minseok was actually happy with his new life, despite the fact he missed his husband and he constantly felt bad. Sure he worried every day that he wasn’t making enough money – not even half of what his husband made in a day to be exact – but he enjoyed taking care of Kyungsoo, being the only one that he relies on and the first person he looks for when he wakes up. He didn’t care that he was pretty much poor, he found that working hard for his money instead of sitting around and let Lu Han buy him anything he wanted was more satisfying to him.

Minseok was the one that got to hold Kyungsoo to sleep, watch him wake up from his nap and stretch his arms out asking to be cuddled. He was the one that took baths with his son, making the baby giggle softly every time Minseok scooped bubbles on his head. He watched Kyungsoo grow, and learn how to grasp onto his things and attempt to crawl. Minseok thinks in a few more months he’ll be crawling. Those things with Kyungsoo are far by the best things in his life, being the one who witness’s Kyungsoo growing up makes him feel the happiest person alive.

There was always that little thing though – that tiny inch of his soul that was missing something.

 

 

 

 

 

 

It was mid-August and Minseok had the weekend off to do whatever he pleases. He decided that he’d take Kyungsoo out in his stroller to get some ice cream and do a bit of grocery shopping with his recent wages. He thought he would struggle a lot, but he had the right amount of money to pay for his rent, food and essentials for Kyungsoo.

As Minseok was pulling the stroller out of his apartment door, he collided with another person walking past in the hallway. “Oh my god! I’m so sorry, I wasn’t looking where I was going and this pram always gets stuck in the doorway!” Minseok flapped his arms in panic, flustered with embarrassment. When he looked up at the man he bumped into, he was certain that his stomach did a tiny little kick of excitement in him – just like when Kyungsoo kicked for the first time.

“You didn’t hurt me, please, let me help you.”

He helped Minseok lift up the back wheels of the stroller and squeeze it through the tiny door frame. Both men where flustered and trying to grab onto the stroller’s handles at the same time and ended up muffling out words of “Sorry” and “Please, let me.” A few times their hands met and Minseok could feel his temperature rising from pure embarrassment.

After the most awkward moment of Minseok’s life, he stood in front of the kind stranger. He was handsome alright, taller than him, bronzed skin and chocolate eyes. He had a friendly smile and his body screamed perfection. It made Minseok feel incredibly uncomfortable with his own appearance.

“I’m Jongin by the way, I’ve never seen you before. Have you just moved in?” The man reached out his hand and Minseok unconsciously shook it.

“I’ve been living here for 6 weeks. My name is Minseok.”

Jongin chuckled and bent down to pinch one of Kyungsoo’s cheeks, he was harshly on his pacifier and staring blankly at the stranger. “What a cutie, what’s his name?”

“Kyungsoo. I am sorry if his crying keeps you awake, he doesn’t seem to stop crying at night but in the day he’s fine.” Minseok replies back quietly.

“How could I even notice his cries if I didn’t even realise someone was living here?” Jongin half smirked and Minseok wanted to half kiss the man and half slap the smirk off his face. “Where is your partner?”

“I am a single parent.” Minseok replied confidently, he’s so used to the question now that it doesn’t make him feel guilty anymore. He waits for the look of sorrow to appear on Jongin’s face and the apologises to come next.

 But they don’t, and all Jongin does is smile at the tiny boy and ruffles his hair. “You’re doing a great job. It’s not easy raising kids.”

Minseok suddenly breaks into a smile, he hasn’t had anyone compliment him for a long time. Especially someone as handsome as Jongin. “How would you know?” Minseok eventually replies, he’s curious about his new friend but at the same time intimidated.

“I’ve got a niece, she’s older than Kyungsoo though but I remember her giving my sister so much grief.” Jongin laughs at the fond memory, showing off all pearly whites. Minseok grips onto the handles of Kyungsoo’s stroller as he feels his cheeks rise up in a sudden hot tempreture, he doesn’t know how to continue their conversation so he awkwardly smiles at the boy and thanks him again for helping him.

“I’ll see you around, Minseok and Kyungsoo.” Jongin waves at Kyungsoo who points his finger at the man and blinks, pacifier still in his mouth. Jongin laughs at his cute interaction and points back at him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It was another week till Minseok saw Jongin again, and it was only for a brief moment. Jongin was leaving his apartment just as Minseok came back from work. He was covered in mud, grass and looked exhausted. This time though, Jongin wasn’t wearing a suit from when they first met. He was in a simple t shirt and jeans but Minseok decided he still looked good.

“Wow you look exhausted!” Jongin exclaimed, sweat was dripping down Minseok’s face and Kyungsoo was crying in his arms.

“Yeah.” Was all that Minseok could say. He wanted to make conversation with his neighbour but he couldn’t find the words. Kyungsoo’s crying was ringing through his ears, he hadn’t stopped crying all day and Minseok was behind on his work. He fumbled through his bag for his keys and quietly cursed to himself, today was just a bad day. His baby wouldn’t stop crying and his hot neighbour was staring at him and he looked like . Minseok put himself in an awkward situation – literally. He couldn’t hold Kyungsoo at the same time while dug his hand through his backpack to find his stupid damn keys.

“Do you- do you want me to hold him while you find your keys?” Jongin perked up, hands already holding out towards Kyungsoo and Minseok didn’t even say yes. He just gave him his screaming son and dropped his contents of his bag on the floor outside his door. Tissue, pacifiers, teething toys, his phone, a few diapers (clean) and finally his keys jingled in the pile of mess. He grabbed them and fumbled around for the right one, swinging his door open as soon as he heard a click.

Minseok didn’t notice it, but there was silence. He looked up to see that Kyungsoo was sitting happily in Jongin’s arms, hands busy playing with his necklace and his tears dried up on his plump cheeks.

“How did you- never mind.” Minseok mumbled, he crouched down and picked up his belongings, hastily shoving them back into his bag. He wasn’t sure if he should invite Jongin in now or just take his son back and say good bye. He hadn’t felt this awkward since high school. “Um.. Do you want some tea?”

“I never thought you’d ask!” Jongin chirped, and let himself in the apartment and speaking baby talk to his son. Minseok couldn’t help but laugh at how cute his neighbour looked with Kyungsoo in his arms. “Your apartment is super nice! How can you be so clean while looking after a baby?”

Minseok looked around, there wasn’t any dirty dishes or laundry around, everything was placed how he liked it. Kyungsoo’s toys were neatly put away and he had scrub his kitchen counters that many times that they shined with the light against them. “I… I like to be clean. I don’t want Kyungsoo getting sick.”

Jongin took Kyungsoo to his play mat and gently placed him down, moving a few toys close to him to reach and play with. Minseok noticed his own reflection in the microwave, he had dirt on his face and basically looked like . Quickly, he washed his hands at the basin and gave his face a good scrub to cleanse away todays hard work. After drying his hands and face, he worked around the kitchen preparing hot water and finding two mugs. While he was keeping him busy, tapping on the counter waiting for the water to boil he couldn’t stop his mind from freaking out.

There was a hot guy in his apartment.

There was a hot guy in his apartment being all cute and squishy with his son.

Silently groaning, he poured the hot water into the mugs when the kettle clicked. He took their drinks to where Jongin was and placed them down gently on the coffee table. Jongin had made himself comfortable in his armchair but Minseok decided to sit on the floor and be close to his son.

Kyungsoo blew bubbles at his father, smiling every time Minseok leaned down to kiss his tiny nose. He played with his little feet and pretended to eat them, each time making Kyungsoo squeal with laughter. He didn’t realise Jongin was admiring him the whole time until he snapped out of his zone.

“I gotta be honest with you, your son is the cutest baby I’ve ever seen. But please, don’t tell my sister I told you that or she’d probably kill me.” Jongin confessed a slight chuckle escaping his plump lips. Minseok couldn’t help but laugh, yet agree. Kyungsoo really was a beautiful baby. His hair made other babies jealous and his wide eyes made him always look curious with the world.

“Thank you.”

 

The rest of the afternoon Minseok managed to feel a little more comfortable around Jongin. He was an incredibly friendly guy, always full of laughter and great conversation. He was gentle, and had a calm aura about him. His deep voice was like honey to Minseok’s ears, and both him and Kyungsoo felt drawn towards his kind nature. They spoke about Kyungsoo, and how Minseok liked living here. Jongin didn’t once mention Kyungsoo’s father or why he was bringing up his baby alone.

Minseok learnt that Jongin was a dance instructor for children and sometimes helps his sister out at her nursery. He lives alone, and lived in the town his whole life. He’s never been keen to move to the city and like Minseok, prefers the quiet life.

“You should take Kyungsoo to my sister’s nursery and let him interact with other babies his age.” Jongin mentioned, Minseok was too embarrassed to tell his hot neighbour that he was too poor right now – so he just agreed that he would look into it soon.

When it was 6pm, Minseok mentioned that he needed to feed his cranky son and Jongin understood that he needed to leave, especially when Kyungsoo was gripping onto Minseok’s shirt and trying to pull it down himself. He picked up his son and carried him to the door with Jongin following behind and said their awkward goodbyes, by this time Kyungsoo was kicking his feet in frustration and wasn’t interested in watching Jongin wave at him.

 

 

 

That night, Minseok lay on his bed he shared with his son and stared out the window. He didn’t bother shutting the blinds, but from where he was he had a spectacular view of the sky. It was a clear night and showing signs of another warm day tomorrow. He felt Kyungsoo grasp onto his finger with his whole chubby fist and bring his fathers hand closer to his face to admire with large eyes.

“Why have you always gotta whine around nice guys? You should act cute and pout” Minseok giggled, Kyungsoo pulling his finger into his mouth to have a taste. “Do you miss your baba?” Minseok sighed, leaning back into the pillows and staring at the ceiling. He’s aware that Kyungsoo doesn’t understand what he’s saying but he feels comforted telling him his concerns. “I think about him a lot. I wonder if he thinks of me, or at least you. Will you go see him when you’re older? I won’t mind if you want to. He is yours as much as you are mine. Heck, it’s been 5 weeks and he hasn’t called, if he really cared about us he would call right?” Minseok’s voice starts to croak with his words, he turns back over to face Kyungsoo who’s eyes are following his penguin mobile hanging above the bed. “I’ve realised now that me and you are better without him, we’re gonna do just fine baby.”

He watches his son as tears start to fall down his cheeks, what did he ever do in his life to deserve this precious little boy? He doesn’t want Kyungsoo to grow up knowing that his father was a liar and cheated multiple times on his Appa. He wants to give him the best life he deserves, with or without two parents. Minseok never realised how difficult it would be being a single parent, it certainly doesn’t come with a handbook.

Wiping his tears on the back of his hand, he plants kisses on his son’s cheeks and sings him beautiful nursery rhymes until the baby is fast asleep. He watches Kyungsoo’s chest rise and fall, his thick eyelashes fluttering against white cushions and breathing softly. Minseok continues to sing to his son, until he falls asleep himself.

“Lula, lula, lula, lula, bye-bye
Did you want the moon to play with?
Or the stars to run away with?
They'll come if you don't cry”

                                                                                                        

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Chapter two will be uploaded in a few days I hope, this is only going to be a two shot but i hope you liked it! I wanted to try something different, i always write xiuhan and i really enjoyed writing this with a new character. p.s don't worry braille is still going and will be updated as soon as i can :)
thanks for the subscribers, upvotes, comments.