Un-Lonely

Dead Man's Hand
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There’s hot coffee in the pot, still steaming. Donuts on the table in the middle of the room. The room has been cleaned and made orderly again after yesterday’s madness.

I’m not sure how to feel about it.

“Hey. .”

“Leave me alone, Seungcheol.” I don’t even turn to him: I simply go and pour myself a cup of coffee.

Seungcheol follows me. “Hey. I’m human, remember?”

I purse my lips, because yeah sure he’s human, but he knew. He knew all along. And he laughed at me right along with everybody else.

“…I’m worried about you, Joshua. After yesterday. Are you going to be okay?”

The photos. The rumors. I’m not entirely sure what today will hold for me. Every single person in the school might decide that somebody without an Ovo to speak of shouldn’t be the Joker Prefect. And if that happens… I don’t know if there’s anybody I can turn to to fix the festival. I’ll lose my school.

“It’s nothing.”

“He’s been saying it’s nothing for twenty-four hours,” Jeonghan gripes from the end of the room. “It’s something and it bothers him. Fix him, please. He’s a wet rag to be around.”

“Who told you to be around anyway?!” I scream back at him, turning quickly. “You have a 100 meter radius you can be in before we’re in trouble, so why don’t you just buzz off?!”

Jeonghan scoffs, rolls his eyes, and then he sees my expression and simply walks out the door.

Seungcheol gently puts his hand on my shoulder, and it makes me close my eyes. Once, I had considered him one of my closest friends. But now… but now.

“Joshua, don’t mistake our intentions,” he says lowly. “There has never been a moment – not for me, not for Jihoon, not for Wonwoo or DK – there has never been a moment where we felt anything less than complete loyalty to you, where we loved you any less than as a brother. There was never a day we laughed at you for not knowing. We… just wanted to keep you safe from evil. We thought that the less you knew, the better off you would be. We hurt you, and we’re sorry.”

I can’t move but to close my eyes. I can’t speak. I don’t know what to say. I don’t know if I can believe him.

“Joshua… whatever we can do to make it up to you, we will. We had no idea… your Ovo… I mean, anything. After all, Jihoon and I are humans, and Wonwoo and DK would go to hell and back for you, literally. You’re our family, and we need you. Before my coffee-deprived boyfriend murders DK.”

I almost snort at that. Almost.

“We love you. Jihoon was so upset last night he didn’t want to go through with our Tuesday Movie Night. He wouldn’t even look at The Notebook. He just kept muttering about how worried he was.”

I sigh. I don’t really want to feel bad for somebody who lied to me, but the idea of a sensitive, worrying Jihoon is kind of… cute. “You lied to me,” I whisper.

“Hey now, I’ve only been lying for a few months.” Seungcheol holds his hands up in defence. “Jihoon didn’t tell me before I got my Ovo.”

Well, that’s news. I fold my arms at the idea. “…so what did you do? When you found out?”

He smiles. “I said, well , you’re the cutest boy that every dabbled in magic. And then we locked the front door and-”

“IIIII KNOW,” I yell, clamping my hands over my ears. “Please don’t tell me.”

Seungcheol grins. “Got you to talk to me.”

I roll my eyes. “I can’t believe you guys. I just… can’t believe it. I thought you were my friends.”

“We are. We were. We want to be in the future, too, if you’ll let us. Don’t you ever think we were your friends for anything else than the fact that you’re out best friend, too.”

It’s kind of difficult, being mad at him. Seungcheol’s face hasn’t changed. He’s still got a soft, understanding look and a dopey smile on his face. And I begin to wonder what I’m kicking up such a fuss about.

Would Wonwoo and DK make fun of me like that? I already know the answer – no, there’s not a chance in hell. They’d laugh at me if I got cake on my face or if I tripped, but they’d clean it off or help me up. They’d never poke fun at me like that.

Besides, now at least it’s clear what all the tension was on Jeonghan’s first day.

Seungcheol throws an arm around me and I lean in to him automatically. “It’ll be alright, you’ll see. We’d be a lost bunch of s without our Head to lead us. Hm?”

“You’d be terrible without me,” I admit with a half-smile. “Jihoon would never wake up without his coffee, Wonwoo would never smile, DK would never work… and you! Well, you’d just get lazy.”

Seungcheol salutes. “I will do my best not to be lazy! But only if you stay.”

I roll my eyes. What a drama queen. “Alright, alright.”

“Come on. There’s something we want you to see.”

He drags me out of the Prefecture room, and I go along willingly, a little embarrassed. What did I kick such a fuss up about in the first place, anyway? They’re still my friends. Always were. Always will be.

There, right on the school grouds, DK, Wonwoo and Jihoon all man little cardboard-box stalls. They’re handing out sports armbands with the school logo on them by the dozen; the queue of students lining up to get a sports band is unbelievable.

“…what are you doing?” I cry, flying over to where DK is chucking sports bands at people.

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Comments

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Hope5C #1
Chapter 32: Thanks for the amazing story. I tried so hard to cry, but I failed.??? It’s a really good ending though.
TKeyAlex
#2
Chapter 32: This is so beautiful and very sad and this story deserves more! It made me cry at the end and Joshua's soul was and will be forever a pure soul. p/s I hate jun a lot in this story omg. Anyway, their love were just messed up. And the ending was just perfectly made and it finally relates with the title that i've been bugging to know why this story is called 'Dead Man's Hand' i really enjoyed this story!
SuJu-Lover
#3
Chapter 31: You are not suppose to make me cry T.T I really want a happy ending . Thank you for writing this awesome story!
ioshwua
#4
Chapter 32: God I don't think a fic ever made me cry so hard. Really well written, I loved it so much.
blue_deer
#5
Chapter 32: Urgh that made me cry. By now I know that you tend to kill of your characters but that one was worse than the others - but it was also sososo good. I love your stories and that one just turned into my favourite, even though I wanted to smack Joshua for being so irritatingly oblivious towards Jun. Thank you for your hard work, please keep on writing your amazing stories :)
Kalyn404 #6
Chapter 32: I... don't have words. It's just so beautiful, and sad, and heartbreaking...
The story is beautiful, seriously. I love it. Maybe the only I didn't liked very much was the fact that Josh realized how much he loved Jeonghan so fast, but it'S just a detail. Everything is so well written (like all of your fics!), it started like something a bit fluffy to finish as a complete angst.
Thank you, cause this is art.
Kyracnic
#7
Chapter 32: i knew i was gonna end up crying at the end of all this. again. as usual. ugh.
lovemeknot
#8
Chapter 32: So i missed a few chapters and now i just finished reading everything. I cant believe this fic is done already ;__; im gonna miss it. What am i gonna do with my life now?!!!
I can't believe how selfless Joshua could be. He's so precious. Precious Cinnamon Bun T_T
And gdi i knew jeonghan and joshua were OVOs T^T
My heart is hurting. Im dead. Idk help.
ellyphxnt #9
Chapter 31: i also died at this entire chapter
ellyphxnt #10
Chapter 29: i died at wonwoo booked security for the wrong date