Jiyong was the kind of person who didn't deal well with emotions. 

She had them, certainly, and she tried to make sure that she never hurt those belonging to her members, either, but she was infallably stupid with her own. As an entertainer, a lyricist, a score writer, a producer, she's supposed to be intimat with what she feels, so deeply intuitive in her own mind that she can turn around and express it in music. And to a degree, that's true. When she's hyper, her songs tend to have a dance lean to it or if she's depressed, a more melancholy tone. Mind, she writes thousands of songs in a year, mixes hundreds of times and almost all of it will never see the outside of her studio in the YG building. She understands her emotions, can usually tell what caused them but she doesn't deal well with them. She becomes a mess inside her own head when she lets things pile up - which they inevitably will, becuse she doesn't want to try and fix them - and then she starts to dweteriorate on the outside. 

"it's a mark of a genius." YG had come told her. She felt more like it was a sign of stupidity. 

But if there was one person she knew who was at once in tune with themselves and had a firm, steady hand on their emotions, it was Daesung. He was sixteen when he entered training at YG and she had no idea how he'd found the time to manage it, but Daesung was the singlemost level-headed person she knew. He had solid, down-to-earth advice and everything in the world seemed to have an easy solution when he was involved.

Problem with a mix but you really like that one out of character high guitar you'd got going on? Just add a drum loop and the two naturl sounds will balance. 

Boyfriend being   about your schedule again because Heaven forbid you go on tour? Leave him and if he's good enough to be waiting when you come back, you know whether or not he's worth your time. 

Paparazzi being a pest? Keep walking and smile just enough so you don't seem upset. 

Seungri's intro your eyeliner again? Buy new makeup and store it in your sock drawer so you can use it instead. 

It was like he was a wealth of hidden in-your-face solutions. And maybe it was because of him and his straightforwardness that she turned around one day, after they finsihed up some recordings for the ALIVE album, and asked him out. 

"Like, for a date?" He asked, skeptical.

"Yes."

"Are you sure? I mean, Yongbae and Seunghyun-hyung are free."

She frowned. "look, if you don't want to, all you have to say is no."

"That's not it!" He was quick to correct. "It's just . . .Well . . . " His shoulders dropped. "I'm ugly."

"Says who?"

"Tabloids, fansites, YG, you guys. I'm not attractive."

She took his hand and pulled him over to one of the waiting couches behind the soundboard. He followed obediently, staring at her as if waiting for her to give him a command, like during dance practise. 

"Attraction is more than a little subjective, Dae." She said, running her thumbs over his knuckles. "And there is a lot more to actual attaction than just a good face."

He cocked his head. 

"I should know." She laughed, a little self-depricatingly. "The thing that people fall in love with isn't someone's body or their face or how tall they are. You could be the most perfect specimen known to man and if you open your mouth are reveal the lurking inside, there is not a self-respecting soul who would ever want to be around you for any lengthy period of time. Same goes the other way. You could be the ugliest, most repulsive looking being out there and if you open your mouth and the light from your heart of gold shines out, people will flock to be next to you."

"What are you saying, noona?"

"I'm saying you've got a perfect body, a lovely face and the best personality I've ever seen." She winked and he flushed. "Win-win for me."

Daesung's mouth dropped open and he sat like that for a good two minutes before he broke into a blinding smile and leapt forwards, wrapping his arms around her. "What time do you want me to pick you up?"

It wasn't long after that when they told the group that they were officially an item. It was just over dinner and Seungri seemed to be the only one who was surprised by it. She wondered if Seungri thought their fanservice and her trying to get closer to him was a sign of her interest. Don't get her wrong, she loved Seungri with all of her heart, but not in any romantic fashion. She had a feeling that he would come to resent her for the way she would want his attention and affection. 

The filming for the MVs came and went, preparations for the tour began and YG told them he wanted this one to be a world tour, stopping in every major country they could. It would be lng, likely close to a year if they didn't want to do an encore and closer to two if they did. She was looking forward to it. Touring was straightforward. All the hard work had been done - the songs were made, the MVs were successful and the dances were practised. No scandals or rumouors affected the tour - it was just get up and sing and dance and laugh and if you enjoy yourself, so does the audience. She liked touring and she knew that her boys were ready to get away, do something productive and extensive, something that would leave them drained and sore, but so exhilarated and gratified. 

When it came time for them to decide their room pairings (after their Korean concerts ended and they moved onto Japan), she wasn't surprised when Seunghyun took the single room, but she was thrown a curve ball when Yongbae said he would share with Seungri. That left Jiyong and Daesung alone together. The wink her best friend and maknae shot her said they were sneaking her a little present here. She would have to treat them to dinner before they left Japan. 

It never failed to amaze her how well loved Daesung was in Japan. Sure, he had Korean and international fans, but it seemed like Japan was his home turf and the crowds would scream for him, fans telling the other members straight to their faces that Daesung was their darling. It was a joy to see him light up, turn on his power and just start giving it. Watching and listening to him sing were things she would never get tired of and really made her hope that after all the military services were said and done, that they would never give each other up. She loved it when they all playedw ith each other and the times when Daesung would let her play with him on stage. 

Like now, how she was up on his back, looking out over a sea of yellow lights, Daesung's hands sturdy in their hold on her thighs. There was something just so exhilarating about being in the place she belonged in with the person she belonged to. There was a reassurance in the way he held onto her, enthusiastic and energetic, but careful in his movements. 

And she knew, after the concert, Daesung would pull her away to one of the bathrooms and push her against the wall, holding her close and kissing out the rest of his energy into her, hand fisted in her hair and arm like an iron band across her back. He would whisper compliments in his roughened voice and keep her tight against him until the adrenaline shakes wore off some - in both of them - and they could return to the backstage to get ready to leave. When theyw ould get back to the hotel, they would shower together and he would make her very vocally praise the universe for his lips and his hips. 

But here and now, atop him like some kind of human mount, she was right at home, nothing but the roar of the audience mixing with her pulse, the heat of the lights and Daesung's body pressed close to hers. There was nothing like this int he world and she was so, so thankful to be the lucky son of a that managed to get it.