- 10 word count: 2580; warnings: suggestive material 

Going out with Kim Namjoon is like dating a y librarian with a shoe .

It starts when the rapper slips into my studio as I wrap up that day’s advanced lesson. Once my students are gone he rushes forward and grabs my hands- it’s been two days since our night in my apartment, and I haven’t gotten the chance to really ask him what it all meant. “Ri, I’ve been talking to my managers and producers, and they agreed that as long as I can keep my relationship private, they’ll let me date.” His cheeks are flushed, dimples etched at the corners of his soft lips. “Will you be my girlfriend?”

I simply smile and roll my eyes, tugging him down by the collar of his t-shirt with ease. “Do you even need to ask?” I kiss both dimples, the tip of his nose, and finally his lips, signaling the start of a relationship full of little kisses.

Dates are quick trips to takeout restaurants, food enjoyed in a warm bed with a candle flickering nearby. Free time means hoodies and sunglasses, sneaking around town to find the tiniest old bookstores and the tiniest old books. Nights apart lead to glowing phone screens, messages at three in the morning, and photos of “here’s what I’m doing right now”. When I’m with all seven members, Suga complains that Namjoon will never shut up and groans “Why can’t you just live in the dorms? He’s always on the phone with you anyway.” Jungkook swears that he’s the reason we’re together, having spurred on Joon’s jealousy.

“Just try not to be too loud okay?” Jimin says, giving me that look he usually gives the camera, the one that says I know I’m a bad boy. “Some of us need to rest around here.” Jin just looks at us like a proud mom every time I reach for Namjoon’s hand or join the group for dinner.

Then, of course, there is the other side of things. If Namjoon’s countless songs and interviews were any hint, I should have known what things were on his mind. More accurately, the one thing on his mind. When dinner is over, when the books are set aside and candles blown out, Namjoon proves to be just as talented as he looks.

“You could at least try to make it to the bedroom.” I tease while he pins me to the hallway wall on a cool night in early october. He grunts in a sort of reply, mouth seemingly stuck to my neck as he insists on replacing the faded marks which usually adorn my skin. Where some men had left bruises of anger, he leaves blossoms of lust.

On lazy sundays my boyfriend sneaks over to my apartment, stretching his long legs across my couch while I nestle at the end. Today his head is in my lap, eyes closed as my fingers massage his scalp. “What are you reading?” he hums, peeking one eye open.

“It’s an american book, one of my favorites actually. It’s called The Outsiders. I read it when I was a little kid.”

His eyes are closed again. “Will you read it to me? I like hearing you speak English. It’s smoother when you do it.”

I oblige, starting the novel over at an easy pace. It isn’t a difficult text to follow, but I still pause every now and then to see if he has questions. He asks for word definitions rarely, otherwise comprehending my sentences perfectly. Around chapter three I close the book and set it aside, causing Namjoon to sit up and look at me curiously.

“Why did you stop? I wanna hear the rest.”

I slide my hands around his shoulders instead, enveloping his mouth in mine for a drawn out moment. “Sorry,” I breathe when we break apart. “People are so used to me speaking Korean that they never bother with English. I like...sharing my language with you.” Truly it had become our own sort of language, one made of careful enunciation and quick hand gestures, sentences that flipped between korean and english in the blink of an eye.

His soft eyes scrunch in a smile, pink lips parting to flash his white teeth. Sitting in the sunny living room has turned his skin into warm silk, which I feel when he lets his cheek lean against mine. “I like this too,” he whispers. “It’s our own little space that nobody knows about. Just you and I.” We’re kissing again, tangling together on my narrow couch in a way that is (for once) completely innocent. I don’t remember the page where I had stopped reading, but as we drift to sleep that afternoon I also don’t care.

Most of my time after work is spent at Big Hit studios, where I follow the band around for various rounds of practices. They’re still performing and making guest appearances, promoting their recent album though the charts prove such actions needless. BTS is ranked first on several lists in a dozen countries. My role is simply to keep them company- as well as to spend time with the leader. Our relationship is still a secret, though most fans suspect Rap Monster is involved with somebody. My students have seen him from time to time, but Bangtan is often stopping by my studio. So far, our privacy is safe.

“Ri-ah, haven’t you gotten tired of us yet?” J-Hope yawns, standing in the living room entryway in a hoodie and sweatpants. As the weather grows cooler, my idols layer on more and more clothing each day.

“Never,” I grin. “You’ll have to drag me away.” I give Joon a sidelong glance. “Jin oppa is just too handsome for me to leave.” J-Hope snickers, giving Namjoon his cue to tug me closer with one arm.

“What was that?” he growls. My eyes open wide, an innocent pout on my lips.

“Nothing, I just said my friend is handsome. You don’t think he is?”

“You shouldn’t say things like that,” he warns quietly. The others are entering the room, crowding around the tv to watch while Jimin and Jungkook battle in the latest Mario Kart game. The noise from the tv distracts my boyfriend, allowing me to grin a little when he looks away. He always has been a jealous boy.

"Hey jagi, wanna know something?" Joonie leans over a few minutes later, dark hair tickling my cheek. "None of those hyungs speak english yet. Tae knows a little and they can all learn to say words but I'm the fluent one, yeah? Which means I can say things all the time and they won't know."

I raise an eyebrow. "I knew that already, silly, why are you bringing it up?"

"Well I was just thinking about what we should do after dinner jagi..." and he proceeds to use his english quite colorfully; he whispers words so sinful that my cheeks go bright pink. I’m grateful that the game music covers our bilingual conversation. If he really does all of the things he promises to do, I don't think I'll ever be able to look his mother in the eyes.

"Namjoon!" I admonish, squirming in my spot on the couch. "Don't be so filthy, Jimin is literally four feet away..." But my lover just chuckles, his hand rubbing up and down my arm in reassurance.

"Don't worry baby, he doesn't have to know."

That night I find out that Kim Namjoon is really good at keeping promises.

“I can’t believe this!”

I throw my hands up in the air in exasperation, glaring daggers at my boyfriend through the bathroom mirror. He leans in the bathroom doorway, expression resigned. “I told you I was sorry,” he sighs, reaching forward.

“Don’t touch me!” I exclaim, whirling around. “This is all your fault!”

“Is there some other makeup you can use….?”

“Nothing is going to completely cover this hickey Namjoon. I told you to leave my neck alone.” I brush past him to get into my closet. I’m going with Bangtan while they wait to see if they won the awards they were nominated for, but Namjoon’s frequent nighttime ministrations have left incurable marks just below my jaw. The boy chuckles as I change into my dress.

“It’s not funny,” I whine. “People aren’t supposed to know about us.” He winds his arms around my waist, making the silk of my gown rustle.

“Nobody will know it’s from me, and besides you’ve covered it pretty well. It just looks like a shadow under your jaw, really. And if anybody notices they’ll just assume you have a boyfriend. Aside from choreography, you have no public connection with me. And most people don’t even know that part.”

“Just try to keep it that way, okay? I promise you can leave hickeys wherever you want, just make sure it isn’t right next to my face.” He smirks.

“I’ll do my best.”

I sit with Bangtan at a table close to the stage. For appearance purposes I’m next to the producers and managers rather than Namjoon. Some bands perform before the award announcements, including EXO and Troublemaker. I mouth the words and sway a little in my seat while the seven boys dance unashamedly.

When the time comes to announce the best pop song, I stiffen in my seat and cross my fingers for luck. “And the winners are…” the host grins. “Bangtan Sonyeondan!” I let out a cry of joy, swiftly applauding the seven handsome boys as they rise from their chairs. Rap Monster shoots me a little smile before leading the way onstage. He takes the mic and bows to the audience.

“Thank you,” he begins, his deep voice echoing through the room. As he speaks I lose myself, eyes grazing over the lines of his shoulders and ears listening to every huff of breath against the microphone. “...and I want to thank those who have supported us behind the scenes,” he continues with a look in my direction. “Without all of the love and help, we wouldn’t be where we are.” He bows again and leads the group away. When they’re sitting again I reach forward to clasp hands with each of them.

“I knew you would win,” I squeal softly, unable to pull my lips out of a smile. Taehyung offers me a boxed smile. Jimin is tearing up, staring the the shiny new trophy Jin is holding. When the ceremony ends the seven pull out their phones to take pictures and thank their fans. In the elevator I finally spring, hooking my arms around Namjoon’s neck and pressing my lips to his. “Congratulations,” I whisper against his mouth, and I can feel him smile.

“Thanks jagi. Someday when we win I’ll be able to thank you in a different way.” I lean my forehead against his shoulder for a brief moment before turning to congratulate the others as well.

“I’m glad you’re here Ri-ah,” Suga grins, pulling me into a hug.

I hug Yoongi back happily. “I’m lucky to know you all. I’m glad to be here.”

Namjoon holds my hips as we wait to reach our floor. “Stay with me tonight?” he murmurs. “Jungkook won’t mind if you share our room.” I smile a little and nod in agreement; he doesn’t like me being away, and I find it hard to sleep without him.

Since I don’t have clothes, Namjoon lends me one of his shirts to sleep in. It hangs down to my mid-thighs, covering what needs to be covered. The boys celebrate their award with junk food and sodas, while Jin and Yoongi each have a bottle of alcohol since they’re the oldest. I sit cross-legged on the floor, looking around to watch my friends mess with each other. Jimin and Jungkook are wrestling, Taehyung and Hobi are trying to have a rap battle. The beloved Rap Monster is on the floor in front of me, sighing as I reach forward to rub the knots out of his shoulders.

“You’re tense,” I mutter, my fingers working out the stress as best they can. He slips backwards, causing my hands to slide down his chest and rest there. My chin hooks over his shoulder, my lips pressing kisses on the side of his face. “You should rest tonight, oppa. You’ve had a long day.” He hums, eyes drifting closed.

“Aww, look at the cute married couple.” Jimin calls. “Shouldn’t he be rubbing your shoulders?” I roll my eyes. “Hush Jiminie, he’s tired.”

“So are we,” Jin snickers. “Yoongi, rub my shoulders won’t you? I’m so tired Yoongi-ah…”

Namjoon reaches up to the couch, grabbing a pillow and throwing it in Jin’s face without opening an eye. Taehyung giggles. “Careful hyung, it looks like our leader is grumpy tonight.” I lift a finger to my lips, telling him to be quiet. Joonie’s already falling asleep, puffs of breath turning shallow and features relaxing. He looks younger when he sleeps, as most people do. Without the smirk or the dirty looks, he could easily be a little kid.

As the other six get ready for bed, I rouse Joon just enough to walk him to the room he shares with Kookie. The young man pulls me into bed beside him, making the twin bed work by holding me across his chest, one hand on my back and the other on my thigh.

In the morning I help Jin make breakfast while the others get dressed. The managers are supposed to stop by with a little announcement for the boys, so the group hurries to eat and look decent just in case. Sure enough the managers enter the dorms while I’m standing by the sink, washing the dishes. My appearance is hardly appropriate, with my hair wild and my clothes consisting of a single t-shirt. I dry the dishes, listening closely for the managers’ words.

“We have a surprise for you guys,” the first begins. “You stopped in a few American cities on your tour, and the attendance was higher than we could have imagined. The company has agreed that you should have an American tour this winter.” The boys gasp and cheer, excited to revisit some of their favorite cities.

“Hyung?” Suga asks, raising a hand and bowing his head. “Instead of paying a translator, do you think we could take Ri? She hasn’t been to her country in years and we would all miss her a lot if we went without her. She speaks enough languages, she could translate anywhere we went.”

The managers look at me, so I bow respectfully while hoping they don’t notice my lack of attire. “Would that make you happy?” the first asks me, and I nod.

“Yes, sir, I would love to help Bangtan. I’ve visited quite a few major cities so I can guide them and make sure there aren’t any misunderstandings.”

Both managers look at Namjoon. “If she goes, there can’t be any foolishness. This is still a tour, so you can have fun but don’t forget that you’re representing your company and your country. Okay?”

Namjoon nods seriously, his eyes glinting with hope and excitement. “Yes, sir. I promise.”

The elder nods. “Alright. We’ll see what we can do.”

A/N: This whole thing is just such chaos it's like suggestive fluff with hardly any direction and I'm so sorry but also not sorry  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯