For Nayeon, it was all butterflies and daisies. Jaehwan treated her like a princess everyday with his contagious smile radiating the office she worked at. He would make her laugh with his terrible attempts at the duck face and never did a day pass when Nayeon hadn’t rolled her eyes at Jaehwan’s cheesy compliments. Nayeon had found the prince she imagined as an eight year old. She still remembered drawing a tall prince with brown quaffed hair, eyes that would turn into crescent moons when he smiled and a long nose, ridiculed by everyone else but loved by her.

Jaehwan and Nayeon had been together for 4 years now. After meeting through their mutual friend Taekwoon, they spent a lot of time together realising they had common hobbies and interests. Since they both loved to draw, they had entered local art competitions hoping they’d win the big prize of a holiday. Even though they always ended up with participation prizes instead, the two had grown closer each time and eventually fell in love. They’ve been through many obstacles together; new jobs, the divorce of Nayeon’s parents, injuries and long distance when Nayeon’s photography project for a year required her to stay in Paris.  Even though many people who fall in love at a young age fall out of love after awhile, these two still had an undeniable connection they hoped would last forever. Jaehwan was her support; not only for the laughs but for the times she needed a study partner or a way to get out of awkward situations and most of all when she felt upset, small problems or large problems he was there by her side.

However, when Nayeon needed Jaehwan the most, he wasn’t there. Nayeon wanted to scream and just blame him straight away but when she was brutally honest with herself, it wasn’t Jaehwan’s fault he wasn’t there… it was hers. She should’ve seen it, but she didn’t. Not once did Nayeon recognise anything was wrong in her ‘perfect’ life, as she lived out her aspirations of being a photographer with a handsome boyfriend by her side. She should’ve realised… but it was too late.

March 22, 2016. The day Nayeon no longer felt like a princess.

Nayeon’s day began as it normally would as she went on her morning jog before getting ready for work. The morning passed and as usual Jaehwan would wish her well and made sure she had eaten. Nayeon smiled in contentment noticing Jaehwan had put her favourite emoticon at the end of his morning message; the pink heart with sparkles. Everyday, Jaehwan was always the first one to message in the morning, he didn’t care if he seemed obsessed, he just wanted to know if she was taking care of herself when he wasn’t around. Still nothing seemed out of the ordinary but Nayeon failed to realise small differences that she was supposed to know of  like the back of her hand. Her day continued at work, editing photographs for revamped websites and ordering new cameras for her team project. Just like clockwork, her phone buzzed at 12  signalling Jaehwan was on his lunch break and had messaged his usual ‘Bubbletea at 4. See you there’. Assuming as always that Jaehwan knew her answer, she moved her phone aside and continued with her paperwork. Everything was just the same, Nayeon lived her perfect life each day without realising the wilts and cracks forming everyday.

One of Nayeon’s co workers; Jihyo walked towards Nayeon’s part of the office holding binders of freshly printed photographs. Nayeon’s phone buzzed and Jihyo gave a smile knowingly.

“Is it your Prince again?” She questioned tilting her head to the side, smiling as she imagined the sweet messages Nayeon received daily. Everyone knew when Nayeon was being messaged by Jaehwan because her smile stretched to both sides of her red cheeks.

Nayeon just laughed as Jihyo dropped the binders on her desk and left the room repeating ‘Nayeon’s Prince is messaging again’ in a wistful tone, making sure everyone in the office knew about Nayeon’s boyfriend. Jihyo’s voice soon drifted off as Nayeon was brought back to her serene atmosphere with the ticks of the clock and occassional taps on the keyboard filling the room and keeping her on task. Her eyes shifted from her paperwork to her buzzing phone as the familiar messages lit up her screen.

‘I hope you’ve had a break. Don’t work too hard miss photographer.’

‘Just remember I love you yeon.’

Jaehwan had always supported Nayeon’s aspirations to be a photographer even saying she would be his personal photographer when he became a famous singer. She gave a small smile remembering Jaehwan’s fun ways to support her before an interview or before she took her first task as a professional photographer. He bought her favourite sweets knowing it would calm her nerves. She replied to his messages, reminding him of those times before continuing her work. At 3:30 Nayeon’s shift ended and she made her way to Jaehwan’s favourite bubble tea place ‘Sweet Daydreams’, hungry after the long day. She was met with the small jingle when she entered the cafe. After ordering two drinks for Jaehwan and herself she sat down at a table near the window, waiting to get a glimpse of the cheerful prince when he arrived. Still nothing had been different for Nayeon until 4:30 neared and Jaehwan hadn’t come. At this moment she knew something was wrong. Usually Jaehwan would be at ‘Sweet Daydreams’ at 4 on the dot and if not he would be there earlier. Unless an emergency occurred, Jaehwan would always make sure their weekly bubbletea meet ups happened. Nayeon’s eyes shifted to the door every time shuffling feet came through but it was never Jaehwan.

‘Jaehwan. Where are you?’

‘I thought you said you’d see me here? You can be so forgetful sometimes but you never miss bubbletea’

‘I guess your phone ran out of battery. You really need to charge your phone more often ><’

Nayeon sent several messages but a reply never came.

An unsettling feeling replaced her hunger as she bit her inner cheek, eyes fixed on the door. She took small sips of her bubbletea, still hoping he had just run into some bad luck on the way. Nayeon’s watch slowly ticked away as she sat alone surrounded by other families, friends and couples. Judging looks came from the workers since Nayeon had sat alone for almost 2 hours with two untouched bubble tea drinks in front of her. Just before a worker had made their way to her table probably wanting her to leave, Nayeon stood up quickly leaving the cafe dazed without knowing what to do next. Nothing like this ever happened when it came to bubbletea dates with Jaehwan. She dragged her feet on the pathway, slowly walking in any direction. Nayeon’s familiar clockwork had been changed and she didn’t know how to feel about it. Soon she found herself making her way to Jaehwan’s house because like it usually did, his presence would solve everything. The bubble tea drinks in her hands became lukewarm even as the cold air from the night had surrounded her small figure. Nayeon pulled up her cardigan attempting to find more warmth. All she wanted was to lie on the couch with Jaehwan, his warm arms surrounding her waist. She soon saw the familiar street Jaehwan’s house stood in the corner of and her face lit up. Even though Jaehwan had completely blew her off this afternoon she assumed he had his reasons. Afterall, she still needed her Prince and she worried about his whereabouts since he still hadn’t answered her calls and messages.

Picking up speed Nayeon briskly walked towards Jaehwan’s house noticing the red brick pavement. As she came closer to the familiar house she noticed multiple cars parked in the driveway. ‘He had guests?’ She thought to herself in confusement. Jaehwan would always tell her if their plans had changed. Still confused, she continued walking until she recognised police tape surrounding Jaehwan’s house. Her feet stopped in their tracks, wide eyed she looked around for Jaehwan or anyone familiar. An officer came from the house and she walked towards him still unaware of anything.

“Sorry miss you’re not allowed to enter the premises” The officer put a hand in front of her, stopping her from going any further.

“What’s going on? This is Jaehwan’s house? He’s done nothing wrong, he’s the most responsible person I know. I need to get into the house and see him”

Completely confused, Nayeon kept trying to push past the police officer shouting in exhaustion.

“Look all I want to do is see Jaehwan.” Nayeon was completely over today’s occurrences, all she wanted was for Jaehwan to give her a hug and tell her everything is perfectly fine like it normally was.

“I’m afraid you can’t do that miss” His face remained unchanged as Nayeon sighed loudly and was reluctantly led away from the house. Soon a black mercedes pulled up in front of the house and a distraught Mrs Lee rushed out, wailing incoherent sentences.

“My beloved son Jaehwan… why is the world so cruel? Why was he struggling alone?” Nayeon looked at Jaehwan’s mother in confusement as they met and Mrs Lee’s arms flung around Nayeon. The officer left and Nayeon saw complete sorrow in Mrs Lee’s eyes. Nayeon awkwardly pat Mrs Lee’s back still completely unaware of today’s occurrences.

Mrs Lee’s uncontrollable sobs and wailing filled the dark, quiet streets and it was then Nayeon started putting the pieces together.

“Why wasn’t I a better mother to him. One the outside, he was happy all the time… he did mention he was having difficulty with his singing career but I just thought he needed time. It’s my fault such a bright person did this to themselves. What am I going to do without my son?”

Pain struck Nayeon, not physically but mentally. She was already mentally exhausted and now she was distraught, the news finally hitting her so fast she couldn’t comprehend her present surroundings.  Mrs Lee continued to sob and wail, probably disturbing the neighbours but Nayeon just stared straight at Jaehwan’s house, it looked darker than it did before…  not because it was further into the night but because a light had been switched off in her life. Everything had seemed much darker for Nayeon and it was all because of Jaehwan, he had been her light but she realised she wasn’t his… She wasn’t enough to keep his light . It was all her fault. She noticed was left opened quivering as she tried to console Mrs Lee but nothing was said, nothing could come out of . Too upset, too angry at the world… all because she coudln’t help a boy who meant everything to her. Tears erupted from her eyes as she breathed in and out heavily trying to process everything. Their last date. Their last kiss. The last time he sang for her. The last time he said ‘I love you’.

Her tears made her blubber out small whispers of ‘I’m sorry’ but nothing, not one word could change anything. She wanted time to reset, bring her back to the day they met and change everything so she could be his light, like he was for her. Nayeon wanted Jaehwan by her side. Only he could make her feel better but at this moment… it wasn’t possible.

The Prince gave up his crown and traded them for angel wings.

* * *

A/N: Thank you for reading the first chapter.