A few days later I go over to see Sehun, I quietly accept the cigarette and leave. We don’t exchange any words this time. I end up only smoking part of it. I actually spend most of the time sitting out on my veranda alone wondering why it suddenly feels so lonely to smoke by myself. I’ve been doing it for months, and I only saw Sehun a handful of times. It wasn’t like he was here every single time. I never felt lonely before, well at least not like this. Since we started this game or whatever, he doesn’t come out anymore. I only see him in passing or when I go over to get a cigarette.

I watch my very bad habit burn up. I watch it turn to ash, I’ve only taken a few drags and honestly it does satisfy the need. Though, I wonder what exactly Sehun is planning. I sort of feel like I’m doing and feeling exactly what he wants me to. “What’s this game you’re playing?” I ask quietly as I dump the ashes into the trash. I end up thinking more and more about Sehun wondering about him.

This sort of process happens several times over the next couple of weeks, I go to see him, I always wait in the entry way and I become very aware that I’m coming to the end of the pack with two more weeks to go still. Though I couldn’t tell Sehun, I’m not really even smoking them now. I’m using it as an excuse to see him and this thought is unsettling. The few moments that I see him are what I’m craving. These thoughts though, I refuse to say aloud. He really did become an addiction and I’ll be damned if I say it aloud.

At work I feel calmer and less on edge, things seem like they did before. “You’re not smoking anymore.” My friend Chika says as she opens a box of chocolate biscuits, her own addiction. “You haven’t been for a while now, I thought you weren’t going to quit ever.”

“I don’t know if I am or not.” I answer quietly as I think about it. “It’s sort of a bet with my neighbor.” I answer quietly. “He’s provoking me, trying to get something.” I mutter.

Chika smiles rather cutely. “Are you moving on, is your neighbor cute, you never talk about yourself!” She says excitedly, she passes me one of the Pocky she’s eating. “This is exciting! I can tease you about something now!” Chika continues to talk about how this is one of the most intriguing things that’s happened since we met. “I bet he’s crazy beautiful. He has to be pretty amazing, he can push all the right buttons on you to get you to actually go through with whatever this bet is.”

I eat the biscuits that are handed over to me quietly as I mull this over. I do find Sehun to be attractive, but then again, I find a lot of people to be good-looking. But he has this whole intense thing about him, I’m not even sure I’ve seen him smile before, not when we talk. Though we don’t really talk much. “Chika, I wish you wouldn’t make me admit how conscious of him I really am.” I mutter getting up as it’s my turn to pose with some of the guys. Chika is right, Sehun can push me just the right way to get me to agree, to get me to go along with this.

By the time I get home it is early evening, but I’ve been gone since the night before, instead of stopping at my apartment, I walk the short distance down the hall and knock on my neighbor’s door. I’m no longer surprised when it isn’t Sehun that answers. It usually isn’t.

“Oh, hi Henley.” Suho says rather comfortably. “I’ll go get Sehun.” He says with a smile. I hear him call for the younger guy who takes a moment before he comes over to me.

“You’ve got two left.” Sehun says unamused. “You’ve been smoking more lately.” This isn’t said in a disappointing tone, more of a guarded tone. He though holds up the small roll of tobacco product.

I shake my head to the offer. “Do you want to get dinner?” I ask instead. “I just got off and I happen to know I have next to nothing to eat in my apartment.”

Sehun gives me a curious look, raising one brow as he tilts his head to watch me. “Dinner?”

I nod my head. “People need to eat, I’m hungry, and I thought I’d ask.” I say as I look away. “I realized today that I really don’t know anything about you.” I say feeling my cheeks burn. “While you on the other hand seem to know quite a bit about me.”

“Let me get changed and a jacket.” He says softly. Sehun doesn’t tease me. I thought for sure that he would. He’s always throwing me for a loop, saying and doing things that I think he wouldn’t, and from what I’ve observed, he usually would.

I hear a very loud voice boom as Sehun enters the apartment, tugging on me to follow. “Yah, what’s that in your hand!”

Sehun looks down to the cigarette in his hand and over at the shorter guy. “It’s mine, Sehun has been helping me quit.” I answer as I take the cigarette, I snap it in half and glance to the very tall and curious guy that’s changed things for me.

“I’ll only be a minute.” He says taking the two halves. “Don’t bug her.” He says as he passes by a room.

I glance to the guy that had yelled. “He’s helping you quit?”

I nod my head as I take a deep breathe. “He’s sort of infuriating, you know?” I say as I think about how I didn’t want to feed these weird feelings for Sehun. “I can’t decide if it’s in a good way or not.”

“Sehun usually means well.” The guy says in a sort of unsure tone. I find this to be comforting, if other people think it’s odd, then maybe things really aren’t as strange as I thought. Maybe it is okay like this, at least for now.