“I can´t believe this camera man” Yongsun ranted in the ride back to their homes “I can´t believe that whole production team… we really needed a second try, that MV is not good enough for the song”

“Hey, unnie. Calm down, It clearly wasn’t our fault” Byul though for a second “Well maybe the lipsyncing and the dance could have been better but…”

“Yah! Stop it already” Hyejin yelled from the front sit “It´s done and we can´t do anything about it now, so chill”

The unnie line sighed audibly and Wheein laughed at something in her phone.

“Byulie unnie, I know that you don´t want to read the news or gossip after the Kaistal scandal but you have to read this”

Byul frowned at the smiling girl but took the phone anyway, the article in the screen shown a picture of herself, wearing a snapback+hoddie combination walking the street with Yongsun next to her. The title read: “Mamamoo´s Moonbyul outstanding charms”.

She read some of it in silence, it was more of the usual girl crush talk, adorned with gifts of her been chivalrous to other girls, mostly Yongsun. She was about to leave It and give the phone back to Wheein when her eyes caught something  a little further down in the article.

Is Moonbyul better than the ideal boyfriend? It´ll sure be fun seeing a man turning her into a lady when she finds a boyfriend!

The words made something click uncomfortably in her heart, a lump formed in and she felt the temperature of the van increase rapidly. She took a deep breath, but it came out shaky. The words came out of in a constricted voice.

“There´s nothing funny in a closed minded article trying to… erase any other view but the one from the ist heteronormative chairman of the conglomerate the tabloid belongs to” She said dryly, giving the phone back to Wheein without looking at her.

“U…Unnie I” the van fell in an uncomfortable tense atmosphere, Byul kept her eyes in her lap but she could feel her members looking each other with concern “Byullie unnie, sorry I didn´t… “

“No…” she stopped Wheein before she could keep apologizing “It´s not your fault, it´s ok. I´m sorry, it´s just… unfair”

--------

They were exhausted and had practically dragged Hyejin out of the couch to the party. Following Amber directions, they found the place and got out of the van while convincing their manager that they would be fine by themselves. There was no way they could embarrassed themselves at an SM party… they promised.

The girls stepped into an expensive looking house filled with people they didn´t knew, Wheein and Hyejin with the whole conviction of getting wasted on expensive alcohol and full on fancy food.

Byul found herself greeting a bunch of people with several bows till she saw Amber walk to them with open arms.

“Hey! Wassup guys, I´m glad you made it” she bowed to the other girls and did a handshake with Byul. Then added pointing at the bags under her eyes “You look like crap, hard day?”

“Yeah… we just finish recording, went home to change and came here” Byul answered with a yawn. Amber patted her shoulder and point the girls to a group of people sitting in couches around a table full of bottles.

“Come sit with us, we have drinks and drunks trainees to entertain us”

---------------------

Byul was having a good time, luckily Amber friends where chill and trustworthy people so she was always comfortable hanging out with them. The funniest thing in the night was all the teasing directed to Yongsun and Eric Nam. The fake We Got Married couple told stories about the filming and the ridiculous things they had to do in the show, they had become friends really fast and called each other honey and love mockingly.

The rest of the people in the party were in their own groups of friends, minding their own business. Byul recognized some idols, dancers and producers in the party having a good time with their drinks in their hands, some of them even dancing lazily to the beat of the music. Byul could recognize the trainees all compacted in a corner, Amber had explained her that most of them had just become old enough to hang out in a party like that, making them excited and shy at the same time.

But the group in which she was now, had a couple particular trainees that were out of that norm, those kind of kids that had been training since they were like 10 years old and absolutely everyone had seen grow up. Those two girls –highly intoxicated by then- were supposed to debut in Red Velvet a few years back.

“I telling you Byullie unnie… all the girls in my class think you´re hot” said one of the girls, Yoo In, while clinging her arm and laying her head in Byul’s shoulder. She had just met the trainee but at some point of the night the younger girl had taken the decision of calling her unnie and flirt shamelessly with her. “They are gonna die when I tell them I met you”

“Hey… you´re still in school?” asked Byul with shock “are you even allowed to drink?”

“Of course… the thing is… I had to lose one year of high school cause the training and all that. I couldn’t keep up”

“I see” Byul said as the girl smiled brightly at her. Even though the trainee was really pretty and cute, she was way too young for the self-imposed rules Byul had while playing around. Also, the inebriated state of the girl made her want to deliver her to her parents’ house so they could teach the girl some self-control.

Well… she was exaggerating. Ignoring the girl still clinging at her side, she put her attention in the group of people around the table. At first they all were talking and playing together, but after a few hours some people had left and the big group had dissolved to smaller ones. Wheein was almost passed out in the couch and Hyejin was talking with a guy Byul didn´t knew at all, Yongsun had seemed to forget her fake husband and was now sitting close to Amber, giggling at something the other said to her ear. Wow, that was new…

Byul found Yongsun eyes and raised her eyebrows in a sign of question and amusement, the latter blushed a deep tone of red and blinked repeatedly, panicking, realizing just then that she was openly flirting with Amber.

The younger girl looked somewhere else, leaving her unnie free of teasing so she could figure out the situation.

Byul excuse herself to Yoo In and went to the bathroom, as expected she had to wait in line. She was scanning the crow that was slowly becoming smaller, when a sight made her froze at her spot.

It couldn’t be…

Across the room, standing with a beer can in her hand and a big smile, was the cute girl from the restaurant. Byul felt her heart do something weird in her chest, something uncomfortable but warm that made her gasp, she stared at the girl till someone point to her the bathroom door, now empty. Once inside, she took her phone out and stared texting at the speed of light.

Moonfart:

Unnie! I need help

Yeba:

What happen? Are you hurt?

Moonfart:

No, it´s worse… Remember that girl from the restaurant the other day?

Yeba:

Yeah… wait. Don´t tell me she is here, that´d be ridiculous

Moonfart:

I SAW HER IDONT KNWOE WHRAT TO DOI UNIIIEE PLEADSY HELPSME

Yeba:

First calm down. Then go talk to her you idiot!

This is the second chance you get, I doubt there´s gonna be another one.

There was a moment before another text appeared in her screen.

Yeba:

You need this

Byul tried to understand what her best friend was trying to say, and it didn´t take long before it cliqued. She needed a girlfriend… not a one night stand or a fling, she was lonely and that was taking away the best of her, bringing down her mood and making her negative to the idea of possible happiness.

The problem was… that possible happiness scared her, happiness meant that the options for heartbreak and pain would open for her. Wasn´t the last heartbreak hard enough? Didn’t she still feel pain when she remembered?

She left the bathroom moments later, her head down to avoid crossing eyes with the girl, just in case. That was better, just ignore the feelings, she was good at that, it was easy.

When she returned to the couch, Wheein was deeply asleep and Hyejin had disappear, Yongsun look up from her conversation with Amber.

“You ignored my advice, right?” the elder commented shaking her head. Byul shrugged as she sat down, Yoo In was gone as well.

“What happened” asked Amber looking between the two friends “it’s something private or…”

“Byulyi has a crush on a girl she saw at a restaurant a while back” Yongsun answered “Now the girl is in this party but she’s too much of a coward to go talk to her”

“Hey! It was private!” Byul protested, expanding her arm to shove Yongsun away, but the leader was too fast and hid behind Amber. “I don’t have a crush, I haven’t even meet her yet”

“Well, who is she?” Amber asked again, laughing at Yongsun actions “If I know her I could introduce you to her”

“No… don’t worry, I don’t want to…”

“There! The girl with short hair next to the counter.”

Byul felt her soul leaving her body while Yongsun pointed somewhere behind her back, Amber eyes widened and her eyebrows frowned before looking back at Byul.

“Oh… that’s… Eun Hae” she said “em…”

“Why are you stuttering? Please don’t tell me she’s your ex…” Byul asked at her friend. Amber laughed and shook her head.

“No, it’s just… I haven’t see her in forever. She’s the sister of a dancer at the company, she used to pick up her sister after practice and bring us food. And don’t tell anyone but Krystal had the biggest crush on her.

“Yah! I told you not to mention Krystal, she’s still not over it” Yongsun hit Amber’s shoulder lightly. Byul rolled her eyes at her friend.

“I’m over it. And I’m over that girl that I don’t even know” She tried to explain “So let’s talk about something else”

“Well that’s a shame” Amber said, shrugging “Because I think she saw me and is coming over here…”

Byul head moved on its own as she looked at her back, her heart skipping a beat. But the girl was not close, she was in the exact same spot as before, only now, her eyes were looking at her, equally surprised.

They were frozen in a silent stare competition, till Byul heard someone cough behind her. She slowly turned around, her cheeks felt like in flames and her heart beginning an irrational fast beating.  

“Over her… uh? Are you sure?” her friends .

Byul took a deep breath… it was going to be a long night.