'You've reached my mailbox. Clearly I'm not here or I'm trying to avoid you. Up to you to guess which one'

"Dammit Kai!" Krystal cursed, throwing her phone down on the bed in frustration. It didn't take a genius to figure out that Kai was purposely avoiding Krystal at this point. It was the 'why' part of the matter than confused her above anything. 

What had happened to Kai that night at the bar a few weeks ago that had made him so manic to the point he completely abandoned her and ran off? Was it something that she'd said and done that drove him away? Looking over at Kai's Aviator jacket that was slung over her coat rack, Krystal sighed in disdain. He'd left it at the bar the night he'd run off, and now it only served as a bitter reminder for Krystal since she couldn't even return it.

Why do people keep abandoning me?

Krystal fought to keep that evil little voice in the back of her mind quiet, the voice that had been her closest comfort and companion for so long that she thought she was finally coming to terms with. She'd been so much better this past month, and had finally started to see the light of hope in herself that had been snuffed out so long ago, and finally felt as if all this wouldn't last her forever. 

But it was almost as if she was taking a step forwards and two steps back, as if every time she started to hope, there was someone else to be disappointed in her and leave her. 

Yet that was exactly the though process that she knew she needed to stop falling victim to. Krystal was so sick of letting her happiness depend on other people, so sick of falling back into the same rut that she'd been stuck in for so long - she needed to do this for herself. Forget Kai, forget Taemin forget all of it. She needed this day for herself. 

Dragging herself out of bed, Krystal went to stare at herself in the mirror. The girl looking back seemed exhausted, both mentally and physically, yet for the first time in the longest time, she saw a spark in her eyes, a light inside of her that was just a spark, but enough to push her on. Playing with the split, long strands of her thick hair, Krystal looked at herself with the lens of someone who needed a change. And she knew exactly what she had to do.

*

There was a certain art to reinventing yourself, a particular path to tread in losing your old self to make way for the new one. It was a strangely therapeutic process, albeit a mournful one a the same time, and Krystal found herself strangely pensive during the entire process. She looked at herself in the mirror of the salon, her hair now a warm brunette and no longer the long, choppy mess it had been. It was strange how something as simple as a haircut could change the entire way a person looked, their vibe and aura completely different. 

Even as Krystal left the beauty salon and walked outside, she felt almost as if she was seeing everything in a different light, as if they grey lens that had clouded her vision this entire time had been slowly peeled away and she was finally starting to see the vibrancy in things again. 

As she went to made her way to a hot chocolate shop to meet her friends, even the person she ended up crossing paths with seemed to not recognise her. 

"Krystal, is that you?" Jonghyun asked her, looking equally startled by the encounter as Krystal. He looked handsome as ever in an expensive-looking jacket and his work suit underneath. 

"Hi," she gulped. Awkward was an understatement. The two of them had only ever crossed paths whenever he was leaving their apartment after hooking up with Sulli, or that one time that she and Taemin had got coffee together. Whilst familiar with one another, they'd never had a proper conversation as such - well at least until now.

"You- you look great," Jong smiled her. Krystal always felt at a loss around charismatic people like him, as if she was being put on the spot for a dozen questions even though he'd barely said much

"Thanks," Krystal smiled awkwardly, "Haircut."

"Looks great," Jong ran a hand through his hair, "Hey uh- does- does Sulli ever mention me or-?"

Krystal had to do a double take. She was very well aware of Sulli's pursuit of both of Taemin's housemates, and had even already been asked by Taemin whether or not Sulli had a favourite. The truth was, Krystal simply didn't know.

"I actually haven't seen much of her lately," Krystal shrugged, willing her lie to be as convincing as possible, "But I'll put in a good word."

"Really?" Jonghyun beamed, his smile lighting up his whole face, before clearing his throat and looking more serious, "I mean, it''s okay. I'm totally seeing other people too. She can do what she wants."

Krystal nodded awkwardly, knowing exactly what Jonghyun was trying to compensate for with this excuse. Unable to bear with this awkward encounter any longer, Krystal said, "I have to be somewhere...but I'll see you around!"

"Yeah! Good to see you too Krystal!" Jonghyun said before dashing off for wherever he was supposed to go. 

That was weird...

Arriving at the hot chocolate shop, Krystal earned herself a disapproving look from Amber, "You're late," she scolded.

"Sorry," Krystal sighed as she removed her jacket to sit down between Amber and Sulli, "Got caught up."

"Well your hair looks fantastic," Sulli beamed, "About damn time you got those roots of yours tidied up."

"Thanks," Krystal smiled awkwardly as she tucked a strand of her newly-cut her behind her ear, "Crazy how a haircut can make you feel like a new person."

"And what made you wanna' feel like that?" Amber asked. Krystal felt like she was being interviewed for a crime with the way Amber was looking like that. Conversations with Amber in general these days had become strangely accusatory.

"Boredom," Krystal shrugged before getting up to get herself a drink. 

What had caused Amber to become so probing of Krystal recently? Sure she was always looking out for Krystal, had always been there for her and helped her through the worst of her issues, but lately the friendship was giving Krystal that feeling of disappointing a parent or failing a test in school.

Yet apparently Krystal wasn't the only one receiving this treatment, as she arrived back to the table with her hot drink just in time to witness Amber telling Sulli off too.

"You doo realise that both of those guys are obsessed with you, right?" she raised an eyebrow at Sulli. 

"Honestly, not my problem." Sulli shrugged, clearly bored of the topic already, "I can't help it if they get too attached."

"Yeah but Jonghyun and Minho actually live together," Amber stressed, "And from what I've heard, Jonghyun gets around a lot. You must be pretty important to him if even I can tell how obvious his feelings are."

"Actually," Krystal piped up,"I just bumped into him. He asked about you."

Rolling her eyes, Sulli sighed, "Look, if he can't control his feelings for me then maybe I'll stop