Alecchi

I. OUR ANACRUSIS [CHAEYOUNG]

It was the third time I changed schools, and the truth was that I had gotten used to my not so stabilized life. However, that caused me a certain rejection to others. Not because I had difficulty in socialising with my classmates, either I was an ace in it; but because, after all, I was never a girl that liked goodbyes.

I hated to have to say goodbye to those who I let into my life, when succeeding in such a thing, was a real feat.

But no one could judge me, right? Not when the only two people I trusted, were indirectly and clearly unwittingly guilty of it.

I didn't know what was to have a father because, the closest thing I could ever enjoy, was one of my two mothers. Or maybe both. When it was about some masculinity, I wasn't sure who was the least feminine of the two.

Having two mothers was not easy. Son Jeongyeon and Son Momo, as the second one changed her surname so we could be totally a family, were the only ones who had shown me some love in my short seventeen years.

It could be said that I had suffered bullying in my school life, but I didn't think it was anything serious. Who cared what a couple of stupid brats had to say about the two women who saved me from a sad life at the orphanage where my biological parents abandoned me?

No, of course I didn't care, much less.

Although I was appetent at the world. If all those people were bad enough to judge me for my lifestyle, did they deserve my trust?

And they said it was me who didn't know how to socialize.

I laughed at society, at my voluntary loneliness, and at all of the new classmates who always approached me out of curiosity every time I entered a new school where no one knew me.

This place wasn’t going to be anything new, because I was the novelty itself.

How sad it was to not expect anything from a new experience that perhaps had more to offer than I allow it to show me.

The classes passed as they could have gone in the previous school in which I studied. At first, it was overwhelming; then exasperating. And finally, boring. My introduction to the others was plain, bland, with nothing exciting that would make any of them get interested enough in me to not be able to bear it.

I had to thank that the classmate next to me was quiet, and also an exchange student. All the attention would fall on her while I could enjoy her tranquility once lunchtime arrived. We both ate in silence.

After school, I left the classroom as if I needed some fresh air, as if so many people around my table were enough to make me feel a soft suffocating nausea chasing me.

I peeked over one of the windows of the hall, and looked at the back of the enclosure. I smiled to myself; it was a quiet place, unlike my previous school. Some students simply chatted under the shade of the small garden's tree just a few meters ahead, while others complied with their after school activities.

I watched the football team, and then athletics. Although sports were never my thing, maybe another club had something to offer. I knew that if I joined one requiring any physical effort, I would become a drag. And although that would mean staying on the sidelines and not get attention, it hurt my pride too much to give it a chance.

Instead, I turned away from the window and kept going my way. I walked near the drama club, and just with the thought of how bad I was at feigning interest, I laughed to myself; this was a very, very bad idea.

And art club? It was true that I liked doodling on any surface that would allow my markers to paint, and had more than one specific notebook for it, but I didn't know if this place was made for someone like me.

Taken too seriously a hobby that I used to de-stress was totally stupid, in my opinion.

Instead, I let my steps be guided by the halls that I definitely didn't know in the least. But although I didn't have a fixed course from the beginning, my feet moved by themselves like I was at home.

And there it was. An empty classroom down the hall, with one of its two doors open, almost calling me in an odious appealing song that I couldn't resist. I looked both ways, and seeing that there was no one around, I rushed a bit towards the source of my sudden curiosity.

I took a look through the crack over the door, to ensure that no unwanted company entered the classroom that had so much caught my attention. I knew my instinct couldn't have been wrong; I had a sixth sense to find things that kept waking up my interest, although I barely had the pleasure of it.

My fingers glided through the instrument in front of me, feeling the polished and varnished wood of that grand piano beneath my fingertips, urging me to make a contact even more daring than that.

I had never played any instrument, but I always wanted to. It was one of those few things I wanted to do in my life, but never had the pleasure of learning because of the thousands times I had to move away, that interrupted even my own education.

I ran my hands behind the skirts of my uniform and held them against my thighs, sitting on the bench in front of me. I carefully lifted the lid covering the keys, and in that mess of black and white, sharps and flats, let my imagination create something useful.

At first, my index finger pressed a random key timidly. Then I dared to press the next. I laughed softly to myself; I hadn't the faintest idea of what I was doing.

I tried again, but only got a roar that scared me a lot. I removed my hands, embarrassed, and looked towards the door; I was sure I might draw the attention of someone with my careless actions.

But I was wrong; there was no one there to judge me.

I blinked several times, and once again tried to create a sound that, at least, wouldn't be unpleasant to my ears.

It was useless; I hadn't the slightest idea of what the heck I was doing.

I was going to get up and leave until two hands rested on my shoulders, making me startle against my will, and allowing a high note escaped from that tuned instrument once my elbow touched a key unintentionally.

The girl behind me let out a gentle chuckle, and I felt a horrible urge to run away. I had enough with hiding the blush that had settled on my cheeks, as well as to hide the embarrassment that accompanied it. However, that girl seemed not to mind.

Nevertheless, I had already decided it; I had to get away from there. I picked up my bag from the ground, which was all the time against one of the legs of the piano, and hurried to flee away the crime scene.

Even if I hadn't committed any.

"Why are you leaving?" I heard the other girl asking, but I didn't face her.

Instead, I just stopped for a mere second. "I gotta go."

An adorable giggle was all I got. “I know, but I’m asking you why. If it’s because I interrupted you, then I apologize." She paused for a bit. "You can stay. I should be the one leaving."

"I don't know how to play anyway. Now, if you'll excuse me..."

There was silence, a silence that I decided to interpret as an invitation to continue my way. I took a couple of steps until the unknown voice again intruded into my thoughts.

I didn't expect it.

"You should drop by the music club."

"Why would I do that?"

"Because you’d be interested in joining."

I was unable to contain my desire to laugh. I didn't know why, but the situation, or perhaps my own nervousness, were pretty funny to me. "I can't play any instrument, in fact. I'd be no use for your club."

There was no need for me to stay there any longer, and this girl was getting too eager to haunt some new flesh; and I wasn't going to form part of this, or that was what I thought.

"I can teach you."

I turned around on my heels. "I'll be late for class if you keep holding me here. I thought I already made clear my position."

The opposite seemed to not believe my behaviour. I had to admit that, even if I myself thought it wasn’t that bad, I wasn’t really nice either. "Just hear me out."

"You have two minutes... and twenty seconds, to be exact."

I glanced just a bit over my watch, just to see her wide smile. That made me stop counting, even if I wasn't going to let her know that. "I play the piano so I can teach you, that's all I wanted to say."

"Just so I'd join the music club?" It was strange enough for me to question her reasons. Was the student council going to close this club? She looked too desperate to catch my interest; too much she was even offering her own self. However, I stayed and listened.

That girl shrugged. “Why not? What, you scared you won’t make it that far?” And right at that moment, I couldn't hold an offended wry smile. Even if I knew she was just trying to have a conversation directly with my pride, instead with the whole me, I just couldn't help it.

A heavy sigh escaped from the depths of my lungs; she had just cornered me; she had made her last move, and it was a rotund checkmate. "Are you saying I'm incapable?"

"Then... are you saying you’re capable?" She asked back.

Who did she think she was to dare me like this? A lot of people have tried to hurt my pride, but only this insignificance rhetorical question succeeded. And it was rhetorical, because, of course, it didn't need to be answered. Although I did, pretty determined. "I am perfectly capable."

"Prove it."

I hated to admit it, but somehow it felt good that the other girl didn't give up despite all the times I had refused. So I nodded only once. Probably I would regret it, but I wanted to make the opposite also regret it, so as not to have to keep with that nonsense when she wouldn't take a no for an answer.

The bell signaling the end of lunch rang before we could close that kind of deal verbally.

I placed my bag behind my back, and walked out the door.

"Kim Dahyun!" The other yelled what I thought, her name.

So I yelled back. "Son Chaeyoung!"

It was the first time... no, saying it was the first time would make me look even more idiotic than I already considered my own self to be.

Long time since I didn't feel so stupid. I knew the name of that girl, but other than that, I didn't know her at all; and yet I had accepted her offer despite not being really interested.

Yes, I wanted to learn how to play an instrument, but at what price? Who knew if the stranger was just being friendly to get more members, and once I would register my name on the form to join, she would forget about me like all the classmates I left behind did.

Who knew what were Dahyun's real reasons.

But what made me think I was really stupid, was the fact that at no time we agreed a place or day, or anything that might be useful for me to stop wondering where I could find that girl. However, call it fate, luck, or who knows what, there was something that made me head once again to the music room before going back home. And there she was, surrounded by a lot of people I assumed would be members of the same club.

And although I really wanted to return to my bedroom and lay on my soft bed after a tiring day of school, something made me stay and listen to the melody coming from inside the room. A shiver ran through me from head to toe; Dahyun was better at playing than I could have ever imagined.

Then I realized. What was I doing there watching her, hiding behind the door? What was I? Her fan? Definitely, I had better ways to waste my time.

I went back on my trail, when silence again flooded the hallways. And before I knew it, I felt someone grabbing my wrist. I frowned, but did nothing about it.

The culprit took a couple of steps to get ahead of me, so that wrinkled expression of mine, could become a calmer one, though still as tensed as before.

I tugged gently on my own arm, making the other girl released me. Dahyun simply smiled in that peculiar way that made her eyes turn into a quarter moon almost perfect. "Why are you leaving?” It wasn't like I was going to give her the real answer. “Is this how our meeting are always going to be? You leaving?"

"Hey about the piano… can we just forget I ever agreed?"

She seemed surprised. "Why?"

I sighed. "I'm..."

"You’re?"

"I'm embarrassed, okay? I heard you playing just now and I can’t do that. People are going to make fun of me, and I don’t want to be a walking joke.” I said as fast as I could. Maybe, if I was honest enough, she wouldn't be so damn persistent. But, even if I wanted to avoid the embarrassment that took over me with my speedy words, it was more than obvious that she wasn't going to give up no matter how hard I tried to get away from this mess.

"Of course you can’t. I haven't even taught you anything yet." Any of us needed to be a genius to know that. Yet, I was skeptical. "How about this? Just try me out. Give me a chance to teach you and I’ll make sure you’ll make it."

There was something in her voice, perhaps in her eyes; what did I know. Something that prevented me from continuing to refuse, even though my head told me that was the most sensible thing I could do. I fixed my eyes once again on the others, with a clear concern on my face. I felt uneasy, that was for sure.

I finally gave up and I didn't even understand why. "Where and when. I need a time where no one is around..."

Then she smiled. Was I that funny, uh? “You’re such a cutie.”

"Forget it, I'm heading home right now, this is stupid." Before I could turn around, Dahyun took my wrist and stopped me. Again, I forced her to let me go, now far more upset than before.

"Same music room every night at seven." Another smile that made me regret my moody behaviour. It wasn't possible for a person to be that nice, right? "No one’s going to be around at that time. That’s totally your style, am I right?"

"Pretty much, yes. Thanks."

I couldn't believe that I found myself at the door of that music classroom; I owed nothing to that girl who so much had insisted me on giving her an opportunity, one that even I myself didn't understand how was possible that I wouldn't have refused for the umpteenth time, as I was used to do with everyone.

I played with my necklace, which was a simple silver chain with a tiny horseshoe hanging from it. My fist sheltered it between my fingers while pulling gently on it. I was nervous.

And before I could regret my decision, the other made her long-awaited appearance. A small smile appeared on my face, more for education, than for mere necessity.

What I didn't expect was that I could have so much fun with a simple practice. At first, I was certainly uncomfortable, but Dahyun seemed to be doing her best to make me see things differently.

I agreed to let her take my own hands and do what she pleased with them to help me find the notes. I didn't like feeling someone touching me so brazenly... but did the tallest do it on purpose? Of course not. It was impossible. And because of that, I stopped having those foolish thoughts.

I was there to learn, not to be embarrassed. And I have to admit, Dahyun had a special gift with this instrument. It was like her hands had been intended from the start to recreate the most beautiful melodies that could come out of the wooden box of that so impressive beast.

That was what I thought the first time I saw it; an indomitable beast, something impossible, totally crazy. But this girl made it look so easy. It looked so simple, that after a long time, I began to have a little faith in someone other than myself. Moreover, I would swear that I hadn't laughed like that for a long long time.

Damn, it was really funny to me to pretend I had learned what key was which, and get them wrong every three notes of the music sheet in front of me.

At least, I already knew how the scale worked, and where to find each note. I could count from the first 'do', and follow an octave up or down. The black keys? I still didn't know what they were, but if Dahyun thought it was enough for one day, who was I to deny it?

At the end of my first class before leaving, the girl asked me to stay, and I simply obeyed.

I closed my eyes once Dahyun started playing the piano. I followed the melody with my ears, rather than following the quick fingers of the opposite with my eyes. I smiled sincerely, enjoying the brief moment between us that the other had created.

And while the song continued, a question woke my little trance. However, I didn't open my eyes at any time. Perhaps I might ruin everything with a mere flicker.

"Do you like it?"

My smile became even wider. "I'd lie if I'd say I don't."

Dahyun eased a little the tempo, letting each note penetrate her new pupil. I would swear that a chill had run down my spine. "I’m going to teach you this."

I rejoined immediately, as if someone had just thrown me a bucket of cold water. "You're insane. It's impossible I'd be able to play something like that in such a short time."

"Hey, it’s fine." A giggle accompanied that beautiful soft and pretty calm rhythm. "It's a duet. I’ll give you the easy part, and if you mess up I’ll be sure to cover you. How about it? No one would ever know if you mess up."

"So I won't be embarrassed or made fun of, right? You've actually sorted everything out."

That smile. I swore that if I ever saw her smiling like that again, it would be impossible to get annoyed at anything she said. It was somewhat contagious.

Dahyun nodded, and I looked at my feet somehow embarrassed. "That's one of my charms."

"I bet it is."

In the third week, Dahyun again proposed more than just a practice at the same time in the same place as always.

When my sunbae started with that, I simply excused myself as I could, and left as fast as I could to my home, sheltered from any contact with my classmates.

However, there came a time when I decided to consider the tallest, as something more than my unofficial piano teacher. Maybe I should start treating her as a friend, right? At the end of the day, I spent much more time with her than I had ever done with any other person I could remember.

So before Dahyun could finish the sentence, I had already accepted before giving myself time to regret it.

The other girl looked surprised, but just smiled. "Do you like ice-cream that much? You didn't even let me finish."

I giggled a bit embarrassed; I sure had a weird behaviour, didn't I? "It's not that. Can we just go get ice cream? It's getting late... I don’t want to waste time here." And to give more emphasis to the need to end the conversation, I bent to pick up the backpack of the opposite, and handed it to her.

Anyone could swear that I was way too weird, but still, the older of the two of us seemed not to care. And that was what I liked about her; she didn't ask unnecessary things, she just let me be. And I did the same. I let Dahyun talk about herself, instead of asking stupid questions.

However, a lot of silences have much more to say than wasted words.

And so our walk around the building went by. There was not much to say, and yet both enjoyed that little peace we were saying. Occasionally, I looked askance at the girl who walked beside me, and smiled to myself. Dahyun was smiling too. I didn't understand why, but it was always contagious when I was with her from the first day I met her.

Although my thoughts were interrupted when we were near an ice cream parlor, which my sunbae chose before I even asked her where we were going.

"Chaeng, what is your favourite flavour?" That surprised me. I didn't expect a nickname all of sudden. However, I liked it. Yes, I did like it.

So I just replied, ignoring the whole new feeling that was getting over me. "Strawberry, of course. When I was little, people called my strawberry princess because I couldn't stop eating them."

"That's cute."

Again, I felt embarrassed. "Doesn't it sound stupid?"

I saw Dahyun shaking her head, making her ponytail move with her. I wrinkled my nose; why did I notice such insignificant details as those? "It's better than Dubu, isn't it?"

A laugh escaped before my hands could hold it. Dahyun laughed with me, which calmed me a bit. I didn't want to mock, when the opposite was telling me something else about her that I didn't know. "Did people call you that?"

She nodded. "They still do. It’s because my white skin and flexibility.”

"But tofu is a bit..."

I thought she was going to show me the reason of such a nickname, but when I turned around, I saw the line of people that had been forming behind us before ordering our ice cream, had come to an end. It was my turn, and soon Dahyun went ahead of me. She ordered two ice cream cups, but before who attended us could go wrong with the order, I flatly refused.

"What are you doing? I'm not gonna let you pay for my ice-cream."

"Wow… I oddly feel rejected." I looked at her, feeling a bit guilty. “Don’t worry about it. You’ve been doing so well with the piano, you deserve a reward.” But still, my hands stopped her. I wasn't going to let her do such a thing.

But there were too many people waiting behind us to further discuss. Although, for some strange reason, Dahyun didn't look like she wanted to budge this time. I didn't know how to feel; that girl had never been opposed to my stubbornness... until now.

A cough that came from the lady that was serving, put an end to this stupid argument. "That's fine. If I can't pay for my own ice-cream, then I won't have it."

And so it was.

I waited until Dahyun finished ordering for her own, and resumed my walk with her, ignoring the fact that even after that, I refused to let her pay. I didn't understand what was the reason she had insisted on doing such a thing. As much as I would have improved playing that stupid piano, I had the right to reward my own self.

Was I... angry? No, it wasn't that bad. But that did annoy me that I wanted to believe it was my friend, hadn't respected my decision.

But it was a very bad habit my sunbae couldn't get rid of. So it was, that without warning, she took my hand, holding the cup with the other.

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