There are two things that Baekhyun hate the most about himself. First, his weakness point. Last, his unconditional love for his unfaithful boyfriend. He really hates himself for that and to make it worst he doesn’t even know how to let those things go.

He looks at the frame in his small trembling hands. There’s a picture of himself and his five years of boyfriend, Park Chanyeol, holding each other hands tightly while smiling brightly on the camera, it was Luhan who took that picture at that time. Baekhyun smiles at the beautiful memories. They were much happier before, there’s nothing to worry about, the only things that matter is their love.

Love? Baekhyun scoffs at himself. Is there such as thing like that now between them? Really? He didn’t think he can lie to his own heart anymore.

The bitter feelings crawled inside his heart, eating up every trust and love that was left behind. The bitterness of being cheated on by the only person you truly love in this world and the painful feelings of being left behind by the love of your life because he choose someone better than you. Should he remind himself how in every night, he always waiting for his boyfriend to walk out from their shared bedroom and leaving him again for the nth time? Just because he can’t trust him enough to forget all the mistakes his boyfriend made? Or is it because he can’t trust himself enough to forgive all the mistakes his boyfriend committed? Was it himself? Is it his fault?

---

Another life without you

Baekhyun lets himself being dragged by his long time best friend, Luhan, who was currently dragging him to somewhere he doesn’t even know. Both guys has tears streaming down their face, hands holding each other tightly, as if they were afraid if either one of them trying to let go which is stupid, because none of them trying to break away from each other. Beakhyun doesn’t even bother to hold back his own tears and lets everyone around them see how broke he is right now.

“We’re here.” Said Luhan shortly once they were arrive in front of a medium size apartment building not far from his.

Baekhyun tries to blink back his tears as he looks around the foreign place. “What did you bring me here, Lu?”

Luhan only smile at him as he brought Baekhyun’s beautiful hand to his lips and kissed it softly. “Because I want you to be happy, Baek.”

As if on cue, the tears that Baekhyun tried hard to back finally breaking free, he lets it fall freely from his eyes as he feels the warm of Luhan’s lips on his hand that lingering much longer in his heart. What did he do to deserve someone like Luhan in his life? What would he do if Luhan isn’t there with him?

“W-why?” His voice cracked, like a broken pieces of old phonograph record.

This time, Luhan didn’t answer his question. He leads him inside the apartment building, passed the guard on the lobby with a small smile and get inside the elevator as soon as it opened wait, waiting for them to enter. The silent between them remaining to stay until the elevator door opened once again, giving them a view of the empty corridor.

Once again, Luhan tugged him out of there and leads him to a white door on the right side of the elevator door. Luhan pulls out a pair of silver key out of his jeans pocket and shove it inside the key hole before he turns it and tugs the door knob open.

“Whose place is this?” Baekhyun asked as Luhan let him get inside the medium size apartment while the latter closed the door behind.

“Mine.” Luhan puts his arms around Baekhyun’s small body from behind, chin propped up on Baekhyun’s shoulder. “But you can stay here for awhile.” He adds slowly, giving a certain tone on the last word.

Baekhyun’s breath hitched, his knees goes weak as he can imagine himself being so small in the other’s warm embrace. “What about Chanyeol?”

“Let’s forget about that for awhile. I don’t want you to stress yourself out because of that jerk running inside your pretty head, Baek.”

“Alright.”

That night, Baekhyun lay in the middle of queen size bed with Luhan’s right arm draped around his waist and his other arm settled as Baekhyun’s make shift pillow.

That night, he fell asleep with his famous beautiful smile attached on his lips.

That night, he dreamed of a better life, a better future, with someone else.

And that night, for the first time after Baekhyun left him three months ago, Chanyeol lies alone on his side of bed, eyes stayed awake with a certain someone running around in his head. He missed his little boyfriend so much, it hurts.

---

Hey, do you remember us?

“Are you busy tonight?”

Chanyeol was about to open the door of their shared apartment when Baekhyun asked him while standing two meters away from him.

He looks at his boyfriend eyes with a tad bit of guilty lingered on his face. He shook his head slowly. “I’m sorry, Baek. I’m afraid I’ll be home late.”

Baekhyun looks at his boyfriend handsome face for awhile, studying his expression while looking any trace of lies in them. But he found none, or he just didn’t even know his boyfriend anymore.

After awhile, he finally decided to look at Chanyeol straight in the eyes while smiling softly at him. “Oh, okay. I hope you can do well today.” He lies.

The smile on Baekhyun’s lips quivers slightly. For the nth time after three months they’re getting back together, he lied again not only to Chanyeol but also to himself. Because no, he isn’t okay, he’s not okay. They’re not okay.

How can Chanyeol forget their five years anniversary?

Being obvious of his boyfriend current state, Chanyeol walked out of the room after giving Baekhyun a short goodbye kiss and an ‘I’ll be back soon’ on Baekhyun’s ear which the latter assumed as another empty promise that he knew his boyfriend can’t even kept for once.

The door closed with a silent thud, following with another loud thud of Baekhyun who falls on his knees, pulled out a longing gaze towards the closed door.

Something’s off. The love they shared is off. The chemistry between them is off.

The only thing that functions right now is Baekhyun’s heart, clenches painfully against his chest.

What happen to them?

---

Just pretend that nothing’s happening

Chanyeol looks at the smaller guy in front of him. Wearing a white button up shirt and a pair of black slack, standing in front of his office door while smiling shyly at him with a beautiful heart shape lips Park Chanyeol has ever seen.

“Do Kyungsoo, I guess?”

The guy nods his head. “Yes, Mr. Park. I’m your new private assistant.” He smiled, with the same heart shape lips.

Chanyeol smiles back at him as he offers his hand for handshakes which Kyungsoo gladly accept.

Something happen. The feeling is familiar but strange. The touch is short but it lingered for awhile even after their hands bre