The floored creaked loudly as I dragged him inside. Yoongi gently pushed me away and slumped on the couch sending dust flying everywhere. I went to get his first aid kit and it was already set up on the table. So he knew this would happen but he still came to school anyways. Why did he? I thought frustrated. I wiped the blood, revealing all the scars and cuts. There were so many old and new I couldn’t tell.I could tell he felt uncomfortable while I stared at those scars but I ignored him.I gently held his arm tracing the self-inflicted scars and he flinched a little as I traced them. He had depression and instead of turning to drugs he turned to cutting himself.  Then he pulled his arm away pulling his sleeve down to cover it up. “Please don’t look at them. I’m sorry” he said ashamed. “You.. never stop” I said upset. “Chaerul let me explain” Yoongi sat up grabbing my hands tightly. “It’s…it’s just been really hard. I tried to stop but..but..I’m sorry” I pulled my hands away and his body trembled at the lost of contact. “One day it will not stop bleeding when there is no more room for you to cut-" "I know, I know please just don't go" he tried to grab my hands but I backed away trying to finish what I was saying. "I’m not mainly upset about that, I’m sad that you didn’t tell me about this” “Don’t leave me” he said in a small voice. “I never planned me but promise you won’t leave me and suffer alone. Talk to me okay” Yoongi nodded and slowly wrapped his arms around my waist hugging me tight.This was the hundredth time he promised.

That night we cuddled on the couch gazing at the night sky through the broken window. “Find the brightest star and make a wish” I whispered. “I have, I have wished for many years” “Don’t give up” I squeezed his hand.  “I’m tired of trying. Do you how many wishes I made but never come true? How many years with wishful thinking? Do you know how it feels being put down, pushed around, beaten up? How it feels to wanting to die? Waking up knowing you will get beaten up and lying on the ground waiting for it to all finish?’ His voice suddenly grew louder. “Knowing what your day be like the next day? Visiting hell every day? Do you know when I wished countlessly on every star every night and none came true? When you're waiting and waiting but nothing changes? When nothing motivates you to move? When you cry endlessly and nothing comes out? When you can’t sleep because of these thoughts? When you think it’s better off being dead because no one will miss me? My parents didn’t love me in the first place how can people love me?  Do you know how it feels?” his voice turned to a whisper at the last statement of his.

I stood up and knelt on the ground facing him and Yoongi sat up gazing down at me breathing heavily as the pain drawn on him. “I’m sorry….I’m sorry for not trying hard enough. I’m sorry that I can’t think of better ways to help you. I’m sorry that you go through all of this. No one should. I’m sorry you feel like every day. I’m sorry for repeating the same words every day. But this is all I can think of. I’m trying Yoongi. I'm trying to find a solution but I'm just not good at this but do know,  I do care. There’s someone here that cares for you but your insecurities take over you. Though you may not believe it it’s true. I’m sorry. I really am. You suffering I really want to stop it. Sorry I failed you” and I knelt on the ground apologising and crying. He knelt in front of me. “It’s not your fault. I’m sorry for yelling at you. I just…” “No yell at me all you want. I need to know how you’re feeling, your thoughts and all your problems. I need to know so I know I need to try harder”. I stood up and Yoongi stood up. His face twisted in pain but quickly it vanished and he smiled a little “Thank you” and he sat on the couch pulling me to him.

“I’m bored let’s watch some on the television” he switched it on a random channel, his eyes were aimlessly staring but he mind was off somewhere else. “Hey uh Yoongi. Let me count your scars”. “What why?” “So I can count how many times you were in pain and I wasn’t there for you”.

I lost count of the scars on him. It hurts me counting each scar. Each scar represents the number of times I wasn’t there for him. “I’m going to be here for you forever and always. You know I’ll always care for you?” “I know” he smiled. “Yoongi you’re amazing person you know that?” I leaned my head on his shoulder. “How?” he asked. His eyes were still glued to the tv. “You’re strong in the inside and that’s all it matters. They say you’re weak but you have always been bouncing back for years now. People would end their life but you kept going. You were strong to tolerate all of this. You prove to people you’re stubborn, sweet, innocent, attractive…” “You think I’m attractive?” he gasp. I took a peek at his face and he turned around to face me. “Of…of course. If only people could see underneath the bandages you look flawless” I stuttered. “I can’t really imagine myself to be” he chuckled lightly. “Well if we covered it in makeup and styled your hair” I took a long look at his face. “You could be a model” “Well then maybe you could help me with that” “Really?” Yoongi shrugged gluing his eyes back to the screen. “I was planning to dye my hair but I don’t know what colour” “Blonde” I replied quickly and Yoongi laughed. “Seriously“ and I nodded but he continued to laugh. “Your taste in men are weird” he laughed again so I slapped his arm. “Owie” he groaned clutching his arm. “Omg sorry I didn’t mean to” I panicked. “Is it bleeding? Omg I’m so sorry. Let me get the first aid kit” I jumped off the couch but Yoongi pulled me back and I fell back on the couch sitting on his lap. “I was joking” he laughed. “That’s not funny” I cried trying to calm my heart. I never thought I was such a crybaby. “Hey hey don’t cry I’m sorry” Yoongi brushed my tears away. His cold hands cupped my face cooling my heated face. “You always cry for me. You really care for me"  he whispered. Before I can say anything, he sealed our fate with one kiss upon mine.

A/N: :) 

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