Why We Separated

July 2015

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 “Looks like someone is really excited.”Boram commented upon seeing Hyomin’s post about the meeting with her fellow IY members.

“Relax unnie, everything is going to be ok.”Jiyeon reassured Soyeon who has been wearing a worried expression.

Soyeon glanced at Jiyeon, “You’re telling me to relax but you are also worried.”

“Aren’t we all? Afterall it’s the first time she’ll be seeing ‘her’ after...you know...their break-up.” Eunjung said.

The rest of the girls gather outside Hyomin’s room waiting for Hyomin who is inside the room preparing.

T-ara has been through a lot of pressure, challenges and even scandal that has threatened their career. But T-ara has survived all these and it only made the group stronger. It made the girl’s bond stronger. They are not just group members or friends, they are sisters – a family. The girls have been protective of each other. Needless to say, they have always been there for Hyomin especially when the girl was having a hard time.

Hyomin who is famously known as the awkward princess, the dorky yet fashionista idol. But behind all these, she is just a fragile sensitive girl.

“What’s going on?”Hyomin asked when she saw the rest of T-ara camping outside her door. The girls have been busy preparing for their comeback next month. Today is their break and usually the girls will take this opportunity to go out or relax and not camp outside her room.

The girls looked at each other but no one answered.

Hyomin read through their minds, “I know what’s going here... I’ll be fine. Stop worrying too much. I know Sunny is going to be there after all she is part of IY.”

“So you have finally moved on?”

Hyomin shakes her head, “No... I don’t know..."

The girls were wearing worried looks.”

“It’s been 6 months since we broke up. I can’t say that I have moved on or that I am perfectly ok but I can promise you that I won’t be crying. I am done crying.”

The girls all gathered for a group hug before Hyomin left.

Hyomin arrived at the restaurant. She was not sure what will be her but she tried to prepare herself. She saw Sunwha and Hara with Wanggyu ssi. Yuri, Hyuna & Narsha could not come and that Sunny might not come because of a prior schedule in the radio. They tried to recall their fond memories. The rest knows about Hyomin & Sunny’s break up and they were considerate enough not to bring up the topic. They talked about Hara’s new book. Hara who has to leave early bid goodbye to the rest.

“Annyeong!”Someone greeted making the rest look at the newcomer. Hyomin does not have to look to see who the person is.

“Soonkyu!”The rest welcomed Sunny.

“Have a seat here.” Wanggyu ssi said pointing the seat beside him (also beside Hyomin)

Sunny was a bit unsure because it was the empty seat beside Hyomin. Like it was planned for her to seat there.

“It was Hara’s seat but she has to leave early.”Sunwha explained.

Sunny sat on the chair. She greeted Wanggyu ssi and the others friendly. She then glanced beside her and gave Hyomin a smile.

Hyomin who was quiet the whole time smiled back at Sunny making the shorter girl smile widely which does not go unnoticed to everyone.

The rest of the night went rather well.

Everyone went to hug each other goodbye. When it was Hyomin and Sunny’s turn, they stopped halfway. All eyes were on them... you can’t blame them for they are all Sunbyung shippers. The two both gave off awkward laughs and then gave each other a quick hug.

“You’re still here.”Sunwha said.

“I texted manager oppa but it seems like I have to wait for a while.”Hyomin explained.

Sunwha saw Sunny who was walking towards them. Sunwha smiled at the plan she just had. “Well Sunny unnie can drive you.” Sunny stopped at her tracks when she heard Sunwha’s suggestion.

“A...a...aniyo. It’s not necessary. Oppa is on his way.”Hyomin declined.

The spotlight is now on Sunny. “Ah... I... It’s ok. I can drive you to your apartment.” Sunny said.

“You don’t have to besides I’m staying at the dorm.”

Sunwha gave Sunny a look making the other girl say, “I insist.”

“Thank you.”Hyomin replied.

“Well manager oppa is here. I’ve got to go. Bye!”Before leaving Sunwha cheered at Sunny “Fighting!”She mumbled quietly.

The drive was quiet.

“How are you?”They both said at the same time. They both laugh and it break the awkward ice.

“How are you?”Sunny asked.

“Busy. We are preparing for our comeback next month.”Hyomin replied.

“I’m sure T-ara’s comeback is going to be daebak.”Sunny said. She glanced at Hyomin and cheered “Fighting!” making them both smile

“How are you?”Hyomin asked this time.

“Well we are also preparing for our comeback which is in two or three months.”

“I’m sure it’s going to be an all-kill.”

...... It became awkward between them again.

The truth is it wasn’t the answer they were looking for. Both ask the same vague question. Both avoided answering the questions they asked. It was quiet until they reached Hyomin’s dorm. They may not be saying anything but their minds are racing for questions.

“Thank you” Hyomin said. “I’m sorry Sunwha pressured you into driving me.”

“Aniyo... don’t worry about it. It’s been quite a while since I’ve done this.”Sunny slipped but she stopped when she was about to say that she misses driving Hyomin.

Again it became awkward.

“Hyomin...”Sunny called making Hyomin look at her. “I’m...”There are a lot of things Sunny wanted to say. But being Sunny, she rather kept it to herself. Instead, she said, “I’m glad we are ok.” Sunny does not even know what she meant by that.

Hyomin gave a small nod and get out of the car.

Sunny closed her eyes, there it is. Hyomin walking away. She finally had this opportunity to talk to Hyomin and she messed it up. Sunny quickly went out of the car and called “Hyomin!”

Hyomin stopped and looked back at Sunny who was walking towards her.

“We are ok, right?” Sunny asked.

Hyomin looked at Sunny who was waiting for her answer. “I wish I can say yes.”

“Hyomin ah”

“I know I was the one who broke up with you yet I can’t even confidently say that I am ok. Such irony.”Hyomin let out a dry laugh. “I wish I can be like you.”

“Be like me?”Sunny said with a you-got-to-be-kidding-me tone. “What makes you think that I am ok?”

“I guess it’s gonna take us some time...”Hyomin concluded.

“Hyomin...”Soyeon greeted when the girl entered the dorm.

“I’m ok. She declared to the girls. Like I said I am not gonna cry. “Hyomin wiped the tears that were threathening to fall. “Like I said, I am not gonna cry anymore.”

But Hyomin’s eyes betrayed her words because tears couldn’t stop falling. Soyeon went to Hyomin and hugged her and it made the girl cry harder. The rest of the girls went to comfort Hyomin.

Sunny was driving back to SNSD’s dorm. She can’t help but recall her memories with Hyomin. She went to Yuri’s room uninvited. Yuri who was talking to someone on the phone notices the intruder slumps to her bed. She bid goodbye to the idols on the other line and went to sit beside Sunny. She was talking to Sunwha and Hara. Sunwha was updating them of what has happened. You can say that the IY reunion is a set up. It was a set up for Sunny and Hyomin to meet and talk. Yuri planned this with Sunwha and Hara.

“Was it that bad?”Yuri asked.

Sunny glanced at Yuri but then she didn’t answer the question. She sat up and notices a CD beside her. She picked it up asking Yuri what it was. Sunny thought it was one of the demo of the songs Yuri wrote.

“It’s a demo cd of T-ara’s upcoming album.”Yuri answered truthfully. She figured there was no point in telling a lie.

“Mwo?! Why do you have this?”

“Hyomin gave it to me.” Yuri grabbed the CD from Sunny.

“Why would Hyomin gave you a demo CD of their unreleased album?”Sunny interrogated.

“She wanted me to listen to it.”

Sunny slumps back to Yuri’s bed. “You and Hyomin seems to be closer these days. I envy you.”

“Instead of focusing on me, why not we talk about you and her. What happened earlier?”

Sunny narrated what had happened. When she drove Hyomin to T-ara’s dorm and their conversation. “I have so much to tell her. So much to ask her like why she broke up with me?”

“Didn’t you plan on breaking up with her? It just so happens that she broke up with you first. Shouldn’t you be relieved?”Yuri asked bluntly.

“I should have but I can’t help but be curious. Does she know that I was going to break up with her? Does she just save me from the burden of breaking her heart? These questions have been running in my mind yet I can’t seem to bring myself to ask her.”

“Why is it important to know the reason why?”

“I just... have to know.”

“Here listen to this.”Yuri said giving T-ara’s demo to Sunny.

“Like listening to their song will answer my question.”Sunny said saracastically.

“You asked me why Hyomin gave me a demo. Let’s just say we had something in common.” Yuri explained vaguely.

“You are both dorks? y? Beautiful? Idol? Dancers?... What?”

“Omo! Hyomin and I have a lot in common. Maybe I should ask her out?”Yuri teased.

“Yah!”

“I’m just teasing you. Well, you know when you have so many feelings bottled up and you don’t know how to express them. You wanted to let it out but you have no idea how. So I showed her another way to express her feelings.”Yuri explained.

Sunny got the idea of what Yuri was talking about. It was the reason that made Yuri wrote Mistake. Sunny looked at the CD.

“It’s track number 3.”Yuri said

Sunny read the label and track 3 is entitled Why We Are Separated.

“I’ll be outside.”Yuri said leaving Sunny to be alone.

Sometimes,
I quietly stand behind you
Talking to myself
I take another step back again
Getting farther
away from your heart
When the shadow of breaking up approaches
And covers my way

I just can’t love you anymore
Deep in my heart
It hurts, it hurts, I can’t see you
Though tears come, I will smile and let you go
It hurts, it hurts
The reason we broke up

Uh Uh Uh Uh Uh Uh Uh Uh
It’s already in the past,
those days are now erased
Uh Uh Uh Uh Uh Uh Uh Uh
Your voice doesn’t reach me anymore
The reason we broke up

Honestly, I’m so tired
The cold words from your lips Whao
You already know
That it’s
already over between us

When our breakup approaches
And covers my eyes

I just can’t love you anymore
Deep in my heart
It hurts, it hurts, I can’t see you
Though tears come, I will smile and let you go
It hurts, it hurts
The reason we broke up

I call out to you like a habit
I try forgetting you, erasing you

But I think I love you even more
Like a fool, I’m holding onto you
I’m so dizzy

I just can’t love you anymore
Deep in my heart
It hurts, it hurts, I can’t see you Whao~
Though tears come, I will smile and let you go
It hurts, it hurts
The reason we broke up

Uh Uh Uh Uh Uh Uh Uh Uh
It’s already in the past,
those days are now erased
Uh Uh Uh Uh Uh Uh Uh Uh
Your voice doesn’t reach me anymore
The reason we broke up  

--       

She’s the reason Hyomin broke up with her. She drove Hyomin to break up with her. It’s her fault.

Sunny rolled to her side and hugged her knee and cried.

Outside

SNSD is camping outside Yuri's room.

“Shouldn’t we comfort her?”

“I think she needs time to be alone right now.”

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hahaha! it seems like the other authors are also on Team Angst! i seeing angsty stories lately too. i'm enjoying reading them!

here is another song. this is my favorite in T-ara's So Good Album. (I also like the For You acoustic version they made in a show)

i got the lyrics from this site - http://colorcodedlyrics.com/2015/08/t-ara-why-we-separated