-November 2, 2015-

Again, today I was woken up by the loud ‘Rhythm Ta’ of my handphone. Damn, I can’t even get enough beauty sleep these days. With the endless concert practices, TaeTiSeo comeback preparations, and more performance preparations, all I wanted was a peaceful morning of not being woken up by loud noises, especially today, since last night I left the company nearly at 3 in the morning and only went to bed an hour after that. Luckily I’ve ended my solo promotions, because if not, I’ll be one of those zombies, attacking people and eating them up alive. Because I swear, taunt me and I’ll be just that.

Just so all of you know, I am not a mean person. But there are just so much a person can handle. I am not even complaining with all the schedules that are organized for me. I am not even complaining about the back-to-back promotions and comebacks and concerts. Why? Because I love my fans and as hard as my life sounded, to me, the life of the fans are way harder. Waiting in the cold and in hot weather to catch just a glimpse of us, starving to buy our CDs and concert tickets, pushing and pulling each other to get close to use, fighting with other fandoms to protect us, loving us exceptionally, braving through all the rumours and scandals that SNSD has faced and still sticks to us, and for those international fans, loving us despite not understanding us, learning Korean just to be able to talk to us, even if it is just the greeting, and still love us. I mean what can defeat that kind of love,, right? You guys are the best SONES. I love you!!! But all I want is just one peaceful morning, no loud shrills of the handphone, no rumours, no scandal, just me in bed, under the comforter, with Jack in my arms and my eyes closed. THAT IS ALL.

But… I guess I just have to push that wish for tomorrow because damn, that ‘Rhytym Ta’ song’s gotta go, because no matter how much I love that song, dear IKON members and fans, that song has been annoying the living daylights out of me these few mornings. Reaching for my iPhone 6, a present from my fansite – lucky you damn iPhone, or I would have thrown you not so lovingly to the nearest wall so hard you would wish that you have shut up when you can– I nearly cursed, oops, sorry my bad, when that one name appeared on the screen. ‘Mr. SM boss’.

Damn this day.

*

And… here I am. SM building. Top floor. Mr. SM boss’s room. Dooms day’s coming. Worlds ending. Goodbye all.

Hehehe, paranoid Taeyeon is the best. Sorry, when I’m paranoid, I’m sarcastic and unpredictable. So I apologize beforehand.

Now, drumroll please. The biggest news of all time. Like I said, dooms day’s coming. Not what I had expected when I got the phone call this morning.

What I had in mind was maybe somewhere along the line of, ‘Taeyeon, since you have had a tiresome week, not to mention you were being wrongly accused due to the rumor last week, I hereby, with all the gracefulness that I have, will grant you a lifetime privilege of no calls ever in the morning. Love, your boss, Mr. SM boss.’ Notice my sarcasm? Please do.

But no. Nope. That’s not it. What Mr. SM boss had in his mind was along this line, ‘Taeyeon, lets ruin your life more by agreeing to MNET’s request for a collaboration between you and that man you were wrongly accused of dating, Mr. G-Dragon for the MAMA2015. Have a great life.’ Of course he didn’t said it like that, but I swear it felt like that and I swear I was so shocked that my face literally went ‘What the f*k?’ all through the meeting. Oops, sorry again for that. Like I said, dooms day’s coming. Thank you all. My family, members, friends, and SONES, it’s been good getting to know all of you. Goodbye. And the MC goes, ‘A round of applause for the leader of SNSD, Taeyeon-ssi, as she made her way to her grave.’ Aren’t paranoid Taeyeon the best?

As I walked out the room of Mr. SM boss, I felt like wanting to go up to the rooftop of the building and jump down just li