Chapter 26 - Lame Bloopers

Sarang:  *phone rings* Hello Yixing.

Yixing: Sarang...

Sarang: Yes, what is it? *scratches her left eyebrow*

Yixing: *sighs* Sarang-ah, i'm sorry. We have to cancel the date tonight. I was already on my way but... I had an accident.

Sarang: OH SO YOU HAD AN ACCIDENT? THEN WHAT ABOUT ME? I’VE BEEN WAITING RIGHT HERE FOR THE PAST 15 MINUTES. DON’T YOU THINK ABOUT ME?

Yixing: Um...

Director: CUT!

Baekhyun: Are you alone?

Sarang: *nods and looks down* *shakes her head and grins while looking around her* Nah, I’m here with my whole village population. Wanna join brah?

Director: CUT!

Sarang: *stares at Baekhyun* Of course I'm alone, can you see anyone else with me? What's wrong with you?!

Baekhyun: IT'S IN THE SCRIPT!

Sarang: I KNOW! IT'S A JOKE! CAN'T YOU UNDERSTAND A JOKE? DON'T SHOUT AT ME!

Baekhyun: YOU SHOUTED FIRST!

Sarang: I'M SORRY!

Baekhyun: IT'S ALRIGHT!

Waitress: *writes down his order and looks at Baekhyun again* anything else for your girlfriend?

Sarang: *stares at the waitress* Whether I’m too lucky to have him as a boyfriend or he’s too blind for taking me as his girlfriend.

Director: CUT!

Sarang: Where exactly are we? If i'm not wrong Baekhyun-ssi said last night that we're far from the city. So... Where are we? *leans against the wooden chair*

Baekhyun: *grins a little* Ah, we're in Zavia Breatan.

Sarang: No , Sherlock.

Director: CUT!

Sarang: Why do you put so many cameras?

Kai: *chuckles* This mansion is too big. The possibility to bump into each other is least. So, we put on cameras so that we would know where the others are at.

Sarang: Even in bedrooms? Eyyyy you’ve been doing some don’t you? Eyyyy…

Director: CUT!

Kai: Run from us.

Sehun: Run for your life.

Suho: Run to survive.

Baekhyun: Run to escape.

Chanyeol: Run before you get killed.

Sarang: *looks at them anxiously*

Kyungsoo: *raises his left eyebrow* "Run now."

Sarang: *still sits on the sofa, looking around nervously*

Kyungsoo: *suddenly gets up from the sofa quickly, staring at her with wide eyes and screams hysterically* I SAID RUN! RUN NOW, YOU FOOL! DON'T YOU GET IT? RUN!

Sarang: *gets up while staring at him judgingly* I KNOW! CALM YO OKAY, OH MY GOD! WHY SO ANGRY YOU SON OF A !

Director: CUT!

Suho: I want your kidney for now.

Sarang:  *jaw drops* What the hell? Why?!

Suho: *smiles* Someone needs it to live.

Sarang: No . YOU WANT MY KIDNEY THEN PAY FOR IT! DO YOU THINK IT’S FREE? YOU FOR ALWAYS WANTING EASY MONEY!

Director: *facepalms* cut…

Kai: *looks at Suho* What is it hyung?

Suho: *looks at Sarang before turning his stare to Kai* Before you chop her, I want her first. I need her kidney. I can't sell chopped kidneys.

Kai: *scoffs* Bloody hell hyung! You've already got the chance but...

Suho: *gives him a sharp glare* I am your hyung .                                

Director: Cut!

Sehun: I want your body now. *places his palm on Sarang’s clothed thigh*

Sarang: Someone’s wanna get laid… *smirks*

Director: CUT!

Sehun: *puts his hand in Sarang's hair, pushing his lips to Sarang's right cheek* *kisses Sarang's jawline before he plants his kisses to Sarang's neck*

Sarang:  *gasps and laughs out loud* It tickles!

Sehun: *looks away, covering his red cheeks*

Director: Cut!

Sehun: *puts his hand in Sarang's hair, pushing his lips to Sarang's right cheek* * kisses Sarang's jawline before he plants his kisses to Sarang's neck*

Sarang: *bursts into laughter* Wait, wait, wait! It really tickles!

Director: *sighs* Cut…

Sehun: *puts his hand in Sarang's hair, pushing his lips to Sarang's right cheek* *kisses Sarang's jawline before he plants his kisses to Sarang's neck*

Sarang: STOP! I CAN’T TAKE THIS ANYMORE! IT TICKLES A LOT!

Director: Cut! Focus, Sarang!

Sarang: *gets on top of him and kisses his jawline* *Sehun shuts his eyes tightly while biting his lower lip*  *puts her palm on Sehun's cheek, biting his neck a little*

Sehun: *cringes and laughs* OKAY OKAY IT TICKLES!

Sarang: NOW YOU KNOW HOW I FEEL! *slaps Sehun’s cheek jokingly*

Director: That’s actually pretty hot but… cut!

Kyungsoo: *gets up from his seat* YOU ! *voice cracks* Sorry, let’s do that again…

Director: Cut! Bring water to Kyungsoo!

Baekhyun: Don’t you just look beautiful in there? *stares at his own drawing proudly*

Sarang: *shrugs* It’s pretty cool…

Director: Cut!

Yixing: Get the SWAT Team to lead the road first! We'll come second. Get the traffics to jam the cleared road. This drive is going to be really fast. Hurry, move!

Director: Cut! ‘Jam the cleared road?’ Really Yixing?

Yixing: Huh?

Kai: 1...2...3… I'VE COUNTED! WHY WOULD'NT YOU COME OUT! *kicks the door and barges in*

Sarang: Looking for me?

Kai: *turns around, a hard hit on his head made him frown and his steps became unstable*

Sarang: Surprise motherer, bet you’ve thought I’ve been hiding in this room all along. B-b-b-!

Director: CUT!

Chanyeol: *grabs a baseball bat near the table, staring at Kyungsoo coldly*

Kyungsoo: *backs away* What are you doing?

Chanyeol: I was. *swings the baseball bat to Kyungsoo's head*

Kyungsoo: *passes out but then gets up happily* Just kidding, I’m fine!

Director: Cut!

Chanyeol: Go... You're free.

Sarang: *stares at him* Thank you so much, Chanyeol. *hugs him tightly and Chanyeol replies* *wrinkles her forehead when she felt a sudden hard flinch from Chanyeol* *releases the hug, only to find Chanyeol's mouth is full of blood running down from it* CHANYEOL!

Chanyeol: *slowly falls down when Sarang backs away, revealing a bloody Baekhyun*

Baekhyun: *smirks while staring at her* Surprise motherer, bet you’ve thought you’ve seen the last of me.

Director: Cut!

Chanyeol: *slowly falls down when Sarang backs away, revealing a bloody Baekhyun*

Baekhyun: *smirks while staring at her* *inserts Arnold Shwarzenegger’s voice* I’m back.

Director: Cut!

Suho: *pushes Sarang to the wall with a knife on *

Sarang: *stares at him with wide eyes* W-what are you doing?

Suho: *stares at her* I-I... I...

Sarang: Suho...

Suho: *shouts* Shut up, Sarang! Shut up!

Sarang: DID YOU JUST ‘SHUT UP’ ME?   

Suho: *looks down while laughing*

Director: Cut…

Sarang: CCTVs... Drawings... Music... Books...Fridge...Kristen Wu...Huang Ziyi... Dead... M-my parents... Love…

Yixing: *hugs Sarang tightly and whispers* I’ve told you not to take this mission...

Sarang: *opens her eyes and sit up straight while pulling his hair* You can’t tell me what to do, who are you? My mom?

Director: Cut!

Kai: *shows his ID*

Security: Sorry kid. only.

Kai: *shakes his head* I'm here to see my sister.

Security: What's her name?

Kai: Umm... I guess she's known as Jae here?

Security: *nods* Ah, okay. I'll bring you to her.

Kai: *follows the security inside the club* *looks at the director while grinning* *le dance to the music*

Director: *facepalms while smiling* Cut…

Dahae: Baek, they're my friends! I can't ignore them when they greet me... Please understand me Baek... I don't even mad when you were talking to other girls. *struggles from Baekhyun's tightly tied rope from the chair*

Baekhyun: *laughs* So now you're pointing the mistake towards me?

Dahae: *shakes her head* No, I don't blame you. I just need you to think more rationally and be more considerate.

Baekhyun: So I'm not thinking rationally now? Telling my girlfriend to not talking to other guys is not rational?

Dahae: Rational, my foot.

Director: CUT!

Baekhyun: *shouts* Yes, I am! That's why I told you to stay away from guys. I don't care whether the guy is your classmate or whatsoever. I wanted you to stay away from guys! What have you been doing behind me?

Dahae: *stares judgingly* Oh so now you’re asking me what I’ve been doing behind you? Baekhyun, tell me why was I behind you! Why? *shouts* BECAUSE YOU LEFT ME BEHIND! *swings hand to her backand the ropes fell*

Baekhyun: *laughs*

Director: *chuckles* Cut!

Dahae: *looks at the camera proudly* Hah, the joke!

Sarang: *flinches when Kai barges in the room with an angry expression*

Kai: *walks towards her* What the have you done? Hurting our friend?

Sarang: *clenches her teeth* What the are you going to do? Kill me? *backs away until she reaches the large table* *takes the wooden stand that is used to hold the canvas beside the table and holds it nervously*

Kai: *rolls his eyes* What can a wood do to fight a metal? *charges towards her*

Sarang: *runs out of the room* FIGHT? HELLO NO! I CAN’T FIGHT YOU! I CAN’T EVEN FIGHT MY MOM!

Meiling: I-I was... Carried and... Taken... I refused to go with Baekhyun s-so I left the restaurant but... But, I passed out. When I was conscious I was at the mansion with six of them. There were cameras everywhere... I-I can't run, they kept on hunting me. And then I... I ran really fast until the basement. I stayed there... I don't know for how long I've been staying there. I was cold, hungry, scared and alone. I thought I would die there but y-you guys came. Thank you... Thank you so much.

Lu Han: *stares at his sister while smiling to Yixing* Meiling was a springer. She ran really fast.

Director: Cut! Excuse me, Lu Han… ‘Springer?’

Lu Han: I mean sprinter! I’m sorry!

Lu Han: *stares at his sister while smiling to Yixing* Meiling was a springer. She ran really fast.

Director: Cut! You did it again, Han. It’s sprinter! Not springer!

Lu Han: *stares at his sister while smiling to Yixing* Meiling was a springer. She ran really fast.

Director: *facepalms* Cut… Sprinter.

Lu Han: I’m sorry! Why am I keep on saying springer? me…

Meiling: *grins slyly* That explains his new song…

Lu Han: what?

Meiling: *sings* She wanna ride, she wanna fly so I said where?

Director: *laughs*

Meliling: He obviously wanna get laid…

Lu Han: Oh my God, stop.

Meiling: Blow it like a flute… ride… fly… where? In your underwear… we don’t wanna share, okay I should stop.

Yixing: *laughs* This is so random.

Meiling: I wonder how you record that in the studio… Maybe the composer’s just like, ‘Hey Lu Han… We just need you to moan into the mic… And Lu Han’s just like, ‘No big deal.’

Everyone: *laughs*

Lu Han: *blushes* Yah! Stop it!

Meiling: *sings* She wanna ride, she wanna fly so I said, WHERE?!

Director: *laughs out loud* Stop now! Let’s get to business!

Meiling: Okay… but seriously? Flute? Flutes are meant to be hold like this right? *pretends to blow a flute*

Lu Han: STOP!

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AUTHOR'S NOTE - THERE YOU HAVE IT. I'M SO HAPPY THAT THIS STORY HAS FINALLY COMPLETE BUT I ALSO FEEL A LITTLE BIT SAD BECAUSE THIS IS MY FIRST THRILLER FANFIC. I'm sorry, i just realised that i turned the caps lock on. I'm too lazy to backspace everything so i'm just gonna let it be like that. Please, please, please comment. Especially about your thoughts of this fanfic overall. I will gladly read them no matter they're short or long. I already told you guys in the foreword that the author-me is really greedy for comments. Lastly, it will be nice if you guys upvote this fanfic. :D