"Let's break up." I repeated when Yongguk didn't react. His face was blank.

"No." he stated.

"What do you mean 'No'? You can't force me to stay with you if I don't want to.."

"You can't break up with me when I don't want to break up." he countered.

"That's how it usually works.. When someone wants to leave it's over. You are the one that had relationships in the past, I don't need to explain this to you.."

"You can't make out with me and then break up with me. It doesn't work like that." he stared intently at me.

"I wanted a nice memory. Like a goodbye gift." I claimed. It was partially true.. What I didn't tell him was that we made out because I just lost control and let myself get carried away.

"You said you love to kiss me." Yongguk tried a different method.

"I do." I said softly. "But we don't have to date in order to do it. We can be friends with benefits or something.." It's far from being ideal, but I'm ready to compromise on this. It's better than losing him completely..

"Are you serious right now?" he looked bewildered.

"Yes. That way both of us can get what we want.."

"I want to date you. Only you. I want a mutual relationship, just you and me." My heart was beating like crazy. Why is he doing this to me? I wanted to break up nicely and he is making it harder on me.

"I won't date other guys since I'm not intrested. I just don't want us to be a thing." I tried to explain. Maybe if wer'e not together it will cause less problems and Zico will leave me alone..

"Don't you think it's a little too late for this?"

"I don't care." I shrugged. I have good intentions and I'm doing it for both of us. Why can't he see that?

"Why are you doing this?" Yongguk asked.

"I just can't do this anymore." I stated.

"What are you running away from?" he stared intently at me, trying to read me.

"I'm just tired." I said quietly, boring my eyes on the ground. Yongguk sighed.

"Tired from what?"

"From everything." I sighed, sitting down on the floor and hugging my knees to my chest. "I'm tired of all the bull with Zico. I'm tired of being scared and alert in case he'll decide to look for me again and I'm scared to death thinking how it will get worse the next time he catches me.. I'm tired emotionally and physically. I'm exhausted and out of energy because aside from running away from him I still need to practice and I have one hundred other things to deal with. And you know what? I really don't mind him hurting me if it means he leaves you alone, but he is messing with my group as well. I can't go on like this and hurt my group. We were preparing like crazy for this music video and for our debut, and what if it gets delayed because of me? Do you even know how sorry I feel towards the girls and the staff who worked on it? It doesn't matter if it's not my fault. At the end I'm still responsible for it and I'm the reason it got delayed." I finally stopped to breathe and wipe the tears that streamed down my face.

"Babe.." he said softly and sat next to me, wrapping me in his arms. I leaned my head on his chest and closed my eyes, taking a deep breath. Somehow his warmth and sweet scent comforted me.

"I'm also scared because I like you too much. I care about you more than I want to admit, and it scares me because I don't know myself anymore. The thing at the hut with the gun? I'm not proud of it, but it was a part of me and I'm scared it will happen again if something triggers it. At that time I just wanted to end this thing with Zico because I had enough, but who knows what will happen in the future.. I could have killed you, and I don't want to take that risk again. I just can't do this anymore.. All of this. I give up. And it's better for both of us if we quit."

"Hyeri.." My heart sank. There is no 'Babe'..

"Just let me go. Do your own thing and let me do mine. I'll always support you, but I'm not going to force you to stay with me. Especially not because of pity."

"Will you let me finish a sentence before deciding everything for yourself?" Yongguk asked, wiping my tears.

"Yes." I said quietly.

"Look at me." he asked. When I didn't move he lifted my chin with his hand, forcing me to look at him. "Do you really think I'm here because of pity or because I feel guilty?"

"No." I admitted. Deep inside I know he likes me and I know he cares, but I'm still insecure about our relationship. I try to ignore it, but I still have doubts and they appear when I'm the most fragile. No matter how much I try to convince myself, there is always this small voice inside me telling me that I don't deserve him and that he can do better. As a matter of fact, sometimes I still don't understand why he likes me and why he is staying.

"I messed up as well. I'm the reason Zico is after you in the first place and I'm also the reason you are in the hospital right now. I should have protected you better and made sure he wouldn't hurt you like he did." he caressed my cheek gently, still keeping his eyes on me. "I'm not perfect like you always claim I am. Actually, I'm far from it. I know you are not perfect as well, but it's fine with me. I like you like this. The thing at the hut? I know it's not you. You've been through a lot and it's understandable. I told you this before and I'm going to repeat it everytime I have to - It's okay to break down. It's only human. I'm not going to dump you because of it. So, if you still want the useless me as your boyfriend, I promise I'll take better care of you and we will handle Zico together. I think he will have a little trouble bugging you now because he has to explain some things to the police.."

"A police detective was here yesterday." I frowned.

"What did you tell her?" he asked while tacking a few hairs behind my ear.

"Nothing much.. That I don't remember." I shrugged.

"You probably don't remember anything after the explosion, right?"

"No." I admitted shyly.

"We will talk about it when you'll feel better." he smiled, reassuring me.

"Oppa.."

"What is it?"

"I'm sorry."

"If you are sorry then stop trying to break up with me."

"But.." I tried to protest, only to get cut by his lips crushing mine. I smiled and I could feel him smiling as well.

Yongguk opened his mouth slightly and I took this chance to get my tongue inside. I explored his mouth thoroughly before his tongue. He groaned and I smiled, happy I managed to affect him. He lifted me up slowly and gently, and I wrapped my body around his so I won't fall. We continued kissing and I felt us moving. At some point my back was leaning on something soft, which I figured was the bed.

Yongguk put me gently on the bed and adjusted himself above me, trying not to put his weight on my body. I opened my eyes when he stopped kissing me, only to find him looking at me, smiling his gummy smile.

"You are beautiful." he stated while leaning closer.

"I look like a panda." I pouted.

"Pandas are cute." he pecked my forehead.

"You didn't say beautiful.." I .

"You are always beautiful to me." he kissed my nose.

"Oppa.."

"Hmm?" he kissed my jaw line.

"Thank you."

Yongguk smiled and pecked my lips. Our kiss heated and I could feel his hands on my waist. From time to time his hands wandered under my shirt, caressing my stomach and the sides of my body. I wrapped my hands around his neck, pulling him closer to me.

"You see, kids? That's why ual education is important. Rule number one is to keep it in your pants so you won't get caught in embarrassing situations like this. You don't want the whole world to see you make out.." I heard Sey's voice. I paled and looked at Yongguk. He started to blush and got off of me, laying beside me on the small bed. Now I could see Zelo and Jongup standing next to her at the door. All of them had disapproving looks on their faces. My face heated.

"Don't be erts like them." Sey told the makanes and pointed at me and Yongguk.

"I don't think you are in a position to call someone a ert after dating Himchan.." Yongguk said and Sey started to blush. I chuckled and Yongguk wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me closer to him.

"Why are you disturbing sick people?" I pouted, trying to look miserable.

"You don't look sick to me." she stated. "Besides, I think your sickness is somewhere else.." she winked, making me blush harder. Yongguk grinned, burrying his face in my neck. It was tickling, mainly because his hot breath.

"Where?" Jongup asked seriously.

"You'll find out when you'll grow up." Sey patted his back and we chuckled. Jongup looked dumbfounded and more confused than ever, which made it even funnier.

"I'm always sick because of you.." Yongguk whispered in my ear. My face was officially red as a tomato right now. Why is everyone trying to make me blush today?

"Go see a doctor." I said dryly.

"You are the best medicine." he pecked my cheek.

"Disgusting." Sey said while watching us.

"Then go out. You don't have to stay here.." I said, looking at her.

"You just want to be alone with him, don't you?" she teased me.

"You and Himchan are worse." I stated and snuggled closer to Yongguk.

"What are you doing here anyway?" Yongguk asked.

"We came to visit Hyeri noona." Zelo beamed.

19 Days before the debut showcase:

"I think you are fine to go." The doctor smiled after examining me. It was the same doctor that came to check me when I woke up. I've seen him several times in the last couple of days.

"That's great." I smiled. I appreciate the rest since I needed it, but I want to go.

"I'll go talk to your manager and I'll come back later to see you off." he said and walked out of the room. I smiled brightly, happy to be released.

~

"Here we go, everything is set. We can leave." Jinu put the bag with my stuff on my bed.

"Thanks, oppa." I smiled. I was wearing my actual clothes and it felt good being back to my normal self.

"Yongguk and Eun Hee are waiting outside." My heart started to beat faster at the mention of Yongguk. I checked how I look in the mirror one more time and followed Jinu outside.

"Are you leaving already?" The doctor asked. Jinu continued walking, probably towards the car, letting me talk to the doctor.

"Yes." I smiled. "Thank you for taking care of me." I bowed.

"It was my pleasure. It's always nice to see here beautiful girls like you." he smiled.

"Thank you.." I blushed.

"If you have any problems or if anything hurt you can call me, I'll be happy to help. Here is my card and my number." he took out a business card from his pocket, handing it to me.

"Thank you. I'll keep it." I smiled politely and took the card from him.

"And you can also call me if you are on the area and you want to grab something to eat or something.."

"Hmm." someone cleared his throat next to us before I could answer. I looked at the source of the voice and saw Yongguk, all covered with sunglasses, a hat and a mask. No matter how much he covers up, I can still recognize him.

"Oppa!" I beamed.

"Jinu is waiting in the car. What takes you so long?"

"And you are?" the doctor asked, looking at Yongguk.

"Her friend." Yongguk said. Somehow it felt like he is glaring at the doctor, but I couldn't tell for sure because his eyes were hidden behind the sunglasses.

"Oh. Nice to meet you." the doctor offered his hand for a handshake and Yongguk did the same.

"Are you done here?" Yongguk asked impatiently.

"Yes. We were just talking." the doctor smiled and turned to me. "You have my number, so call me if you need anything.. Or just call me anytime you want. I'll always answer you call." he winked.

"Thank you." I looked at Yongguk, who seemed uncomfortable. "I need to go. Thank you again for taking care of me." I bowed and went with Yongguk to the car.

It was a short walk, but it was tensed. None of us said anything. In the car I sat next to Eun Hee and Yongguk sat at the front, near Jinu.

"I'm glad you're fine." Eun Hee beamed and hugged me tightly.

"Thanks." I hugged her back.

"The guy you talked to.. Was he a doctor?" she asked.

"Yes, he took care of me."

"He is handsome." she stated, and I heard Yongguk scoff.

"Don't you have Youngjae? Why are you looking at other guys?" I .

"Shh!" she elbowed me, signaling me Jinu is there. I covered my mouth, realizing I messed up.

"I'm sorry." I apologized. I'm really stupid for not realizing it sooner. I looked over at Jinu, who seemed to be talking to Yongguk about something. At least that.. Maybe he didn't hear what I said.

"We are not dating.. And it doesn't mean I can't look!" she argued, and I laughed. "How do you know about it anyway?"

"Daehyun."

"I didn't think otherwise.." she sighed.

"So did you get the cute doctor's phone number?" Eun Hee asked after a short silence. I noticed Yongguk was glaring at me through the mirror.

"He gave me his business card in case I'm not feeling well." I explained, hoping Yongguk will hear it as well.

"You are so lucky!" she beamed. "You get a lot of attention from everyone."

"That's not necessarily a good thing.."

"Wer'e here." Jinu declared and stopped to car in the company's parking lot, ending our conversation.

~

"You really didn't notice?" Yongguk asked when we walked to the company. He was walking next to me but didn't make any attemp to have skinship.

"Notice what?" I asked confused.

"That he tried to hit on you."

"I did, but it doesn't matter since I'm not intrested. I would have put him in place if you didn't show up."

"It didn't look like that from the side.. You were blushing and giggling while talking to him." he shrugged. I stopped walking, glaring at him.

"How about you learn to trust me? It's not my fault you can't handle your jealousy." I kept walking and he grabbed my arm, turning me around to face him.

"I trust you." he stated, looking at me.

"You don't act like you do." I shrugged.

"I was just scared you'll leave." he admitted, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. My anger faded away.

"I'm supposed to be insecure, not you." I .

"Don't laugh." he pouted.

"I'm not leaving you." I stated and pecked his lips. He smiled and grabbed my hand, leading me inside the building.

~

"Hyeri, come to my office." the CEO ordered the moment I stepped inside.

"Let's go." Yongguk smiled and started walking towards the CEO's office, still holding my hand.

"Did you change your name to Hyeri in the short time I didn't see you?" the CEO asked Yongguk.

"No, sir."

"Then stay here. I wanted to talk to Hyeri." the CEO said dryly. Yongguk let go of my hand and I started following the CEO to his office. After two steps the CEO stopped walking and turned to me and Yongguk.

"Oh, and stop being so lovey-dovey here. I didn't allow your relationship so you can do it publicly.. I don't want the staff to talk and I don't want you to set bad example to others, so keep it reserved and between yourselves." the CEO scolded both of us.

"Yes, sir." me and Yongguk said together.

"Hyeri, come with me."

Author's Note:

I know Hyeri seems spoiled and like she is taking things out of proportion and throwing childish tantrums, but I hope that you can understand her point of view more right now. The long part with Gukkie (well, at least until they started making out) was meant to help you understand her thoughts and her behaviour. I hope I managed to do it properly :)

I know some things are still blurred about the explosion and the hut, it will be clearer in the next chapters. It will probably be more like a side story since I want to go through with their debut (or else this story will never end :P), but I will explain everything.

Thank you for reading, commenting, subscribing, etc.!

M.