I sighed softly as I watched a patient signed the paper to check out, bowing slightly as they left. I was a trainee nurse at a hospital close to the collage I studied at, half the time I got to work here while the other half was spent studying medicine and physics. My parents were not happy about my choose, they wanted me to work in finance but my heart was in nursing and helping others.

Recently there was a rush, doctors and nurses had rushed past to the operating theatre. I was concerned as it was my first time seeing such a panic. I mainly only dealt with students that got drunk, didn't feel well or had done something stupid and needed stitches or keeping and eye on. I only had one patient left on my ward, she had been feeling poorly but she should be leaving later on after feeling much better.

I sat behind the desk by the main doors to the ward, I could hear nurses rushing about and I wished I could have been able to help but I wasn't trained enough yet. I kept my self busy with doing paper work and updating people's files on the computer. I was startled when one of the head nurses came through the door in a hurry with a concerned look on her face.

"Kibum, can you get the heart rate monitor and few other recovery equipment prepared please" Nurse Victoria asked before bowing and rushing away down the corridor. The sound of her heels clicked against the floor as she disappeared into the operating theatre.

I rushed to get everything together, I had never looked after a patient after getting surgery. It was such a big responsibility and I felt a little giddy to have been asked to care for the injured patient. I cleared the area by the window, making sure everything was supposed to be where it needed to be. I couldn't do much more then wait, nurse Victoria told me to go on my break earlier as the recovering paitent will need twenty four hour care for the first few days.

I smiled as another nurse covered my station while I went down to get some food and meet up with my best friend Taemin. I had known Taemin for many years, we basically grew up together and became very close friends. Taemin studied at the same college I did although he chose a completely different course. He studied dance and art which is on the other side of the college to where I studied. Throughout the years I had been lucky to have Taemin as a friend, he helped me through tough times and with my stupid love life.

"Hey Key, how are you doing" Taemin said before biting into his chicken pasta. I smiled and sat down, opening the chicken salad wrap and taking a bit, I didn't realise just how hungry I was.

I only had half an hour and when I go back, I will find out who I am caring for, I felt a little nervous for some reason. "I'm fine Tae, just a little nervous. I am going to be caring for someone who needed surgery. This is a huge deal Tae, like this could work in my favour to move up the ladder and improve my score" I spoke softly as I tucked in to my lunch. So much was ridding on giving this huge responsibility.

It sounded a little rude because it sounds like I don't care about the injured person but that isn't the case. I do care and I did worry and give my best to care for everyone that ended up on my ward. Taemin nodded and gave me some advice and support which  was just what I needed right now. I hadn't had much luck lately, my life seemed to take a downward spiral.

Half the problem was my own stupid fault and I regret my choice and rash decisions back them. It is something that always lingers in my mind and although I try and put a brave face on it, it still hurt because I was a damn fool. Taemin knew about my regrets and he even told me I was stupid and I was naive and refused to admit how right Taemin was and how wrong I was. Our lunch break went quickly, I bid goodbye to Taemin and walked back up to the ward, making sure to wash my hands before entering.

"Kibum, your patient is now settled in the ward to recover. Right now he is still out of it due to the heavy use of anaesthetic. His injuries include a broken eye socket which has been fixed but we need to keep a close eye on that. A snapped bone in his leg, a deep gash to the side of his head and above his left eye. Stitches have been used and the scratches need bathing" Nurse Victoria briefed me and I felt shocked.

This poor man had been through a lot, nurse Victoria told me it happened during a game of rugby from the college and that information made my heart drop. I tried to shake it off and act like I wasn't now very concerned and worried. I got a list of medicines and creams to use to help make the male patient better. I could hear the heart monitor beeping steady, nurse Victoria bid goodbye and I felt so on edge.

I took slow footsteps towards the bed with the injured man, I bit my lip and told my self I was being stupid to think it was him hurt in the bed. He didn't deserve any more pain then what had happened, it was mainly my fault but I don't deserve the love of such a sweet, loving, caring man with a heart of gold. I wanted to slap my self for being stupid.

I bet it was just some rough male who got hurt playing rugby. It was common to deal with many team players who get injured with broken teeth, cracked rips or broken fingers. As I turned around from the curtain hiding the recovering man, I gasped and slapped a hand across my mouth, my eyes started to water as my biggest nightmare was confirmed.

"Oh Jjong" I whispered as I rushed to his side, sitting on the chair beside his head. Seeing him look so battered and bruised hurt my heart, it was like a hammer trying to break my already cracked and fragile heart.

Jonghyun was my boyfriend for three years,  he was the best thing to ever happen to me although it was rare for me to express my feelings. Jonghyun knew me well and I could read him like a book yet I let one stupid rumour cause us to tear apart. I had accused him of cheating on me when it all turned out to be a lie and a reason for someone else to have Jonghyun although it didn't work.

I knew Jonghyun wouldn't cheat on me, he isn't like that yet I chose to be a fool and hurt the only man I have ever loved. His eyes were swollen and bruised, his right eye covered with a patch, it hurt to see those usual bright and bubbly puppy eyes so broken and abused. "Why did you go and join rugby you silly idiot, why couldn't you be happy and do what you wished with music.

Forget your parents Jjong, your happiness is more important then them. Your like your brother Minho who is too competitive for his own good, let your parents praise him and think he is perfect because your perfect in my eyes" I whispered softly, gently holding the large warm hand that would hold mine softly before. I was careful to not put too much pressure on the cuts, kissing the back of his hand softly.

I knew my Jjong wasn't a sporty type, his parents always seemed to be more prouder of his brothers Onew and Minho. Onew studied law and was half way to becoming a lawyer while Minho was one of the top sporting men in the college and had won several medals and trophies. Jonghyun had a love for music and he was amazing at it,  his songs were so beautiful, full of emotion and passion yet his parents looked down on him.

I could hear the other patient moving about so I got up but I had to kiss Jjong on the forehead lightly before leaving to sign her out. It didn't take long and then I was alone with Jonghyun again although he was out of it still. I walked back down to sit with him, as my eyes lingered on his body I noticed something which worried me even more.

"Look at how thin you have become Jjong. Your not eating again are you? You really need me to nag you to eat properly Mr, that is it. Once your released from hospital, you are coming to live in my dorm and I cook all your favourite dishes. I will make you crab soup, beef stew and chicken noddles, no more cheap instant ramen for you" I said softly while staring at the sleeping man beside me.

It always worried me when Jonghyun didn't eat, I felt bad as I knew it was my fault he didn't properly or very much. Jonghyun always looked so much better with a little bit of meat on his bones. "Also I am going to get you off the ruby team Jjongie, you hear me, no more sports for you and I will get you on the music course even if I have to give up everything for it" I added and sniffled softly, a tear drop escaped from my eye as I held his hand in mine.

Why did I have to be so dumb and hurt him, such a beautiful man who treated me like a prince, he never looked down on me or treated me like a piece of meat. I knew he always loved me and wasn't just trying to get into my pants like many other men tried to do. I used my other hand to wipe my eyes, I am a nurse, I can't cry yet all I felt was regret and guilt, I hurt knowing that I had hurt Jonghyun.

I had to make sure the needle was secure in his other hand that connected to the drip, I knew if Jonghyun was awake he would whine about the needle in his hand. I also checked the papers clipped on the bored at the end of his bed. It was late and I knew I wouldn't be getting anyone else in, closing the doors to the ward and putting the paper work away, I went into the small room behind the desk.

It was a mini bedroom for me to stay in when I was needed or in an emergency, I couldn't stay in the room tonight though. I grabbed my blanket and pillow and walked down to Jonghyun's bed, I moved another chair and made it face the other chair, making it into a mini bed beside Jonghyun. I missed Jonghyun so much, from his soft, tender touch to his tender loving kisses and cuddles.

I even missed his cheesy romantic words, those puppy eyes never failed to turn my legs to jelly. His scent was my ultimate favourite scent. It was sweet and fruity like sweets, it reminded me of star burst chew sweets and it was a scent that I cherished and loved. It always made my heart skip a beat and toes curl in pure bliss. From the tips of his toes to the fluffy strands of hair on his head, Jonghyun was utterly perfect in my eyes. I could never love another like I loved Jonghyun, he was the only man for me and the only one I trust with my heart and soul.

"I...I'm sorry for what I have done Jonghyun. I don't know if you can hear me or not but I really regret what I did five months ago. Life without you is horrible and I don't know how I am surviving right now. I feel so lost, I hurt my self because I hurt you, I feel so guilty for believing such a stupid rumour when I knew you wasn't that kind of man.

I hope you know that I have never stopped loving you and caring about you, your all I think about day and night. I hope you can forgive me although I don't deserve to be forgiven, I didn't even give you time to explain before I just left. I am just such an awful person Jonghyun. I...I didn't mean to hurt you, I just want you happy" I spoke softly as I settled beside Jonghyun.

I had dimmed the lights so I could in case something happens but we could both sleep well without blinding lights keeping us awake. I always wished every night before I closed my eyes that Jonghyun would forgive me even if he didn't love me any more. It hurt me even more but if I couldn't be his boyfriend then I would hope we could remain very good friends.

I can't imagine my life without my bubbly, idiot puppy boyfriend who always knew how to cheer me up and make me feel better and happy when I felt down. I knew even if Jonghyun forgave me, it would take a long time for him to trust me again but I would wait. I don't care if it took days, weeks, months or years for Jonghyun to fully trust me again, as long as I got to be with him and love him and hold him in my arms then I am happy.

I tried to get comfortable but I didn't feel very tired even after a long day on my feet. I knew I was taking a risk of getting into serious trouble sleeping next to a patient like this but Jonghyun means to much to me just to leave him here while I went to my dorm or slept in the little room.

"I would do anything for you Jonghyun. Absolutely anything, whatever makes you happy Jjongie" I whispered softly before leaning over to press my lips softly to his bruised cheek.

The feeling of his soft, tanned warm skin against my lips made my heart flip about in my chest, I missed holding his hand, cuddling with him as he kissed me with so much love. I sighed as I laid back down and used my other hand to pull the blanket over my body. I refused to let go of Jonghyun's hand, the warmth that spread through my body made my body tingle and toes curl.

"I love you Jonghyun, always have and always will" I added softly before closing my eyes. I was slowly drifting before I jolted awake at the feeling of Jonghyun's hand squeezing mine softly.

I gazed widened eyed at the sleeping beauty covered in wires stitches and bandages, his leg hanging up from the ceiling. I expected something to happen but maybe I just imagined the hand squeeze, I felt a little disappointed. "Goodnight again Jjong, poke me if you need anything" I chuckled the last part softly.

Jonghyun always used to poke me gently on the nose then on my belly when he wanted something when we dated. It was actually adorable although I used to pretend to be annoyed at him. As I closed my eyes again, I felt his hand squeeze mine and I know it felt it this time, I gazed at my love on the bed, hoping to see a sign that he can hear me.

"J...J..Jonghyun, c...can you hear me? I...Is there anything you need" I asked softly, not speaking too loud to ruin the moment between us right now. What I saw happen before me left me shocked and surprised, Jonghyun squeezed my hand again but I noticed a small smile on his slightly bruised lips. I blinked to make sure I wasn't dreaming but his lips were in a small smile, was Jonghyun happy that I was there taking care of him.

"O...Oh my gosh J...Jjong you can hear me. P...Please if you need anything then tell me or try and show me. L..Let me make it up to you" I said as I felt hopeful that Jonghyun would actually do something.

I watched as he remained the same for a while then I noticed his lips change in to the smallest and most adorable little pout, I wanted to take a photo but it seemed very inappropriate. The sight before me made me fall in love all over again, he may look like a playboy to most but Jonghyun was such a sensitive, kind man. His sliver/blond hair still suited him so well, he looked perfect in my eyes even with many bruises and scratches covering his god like body.

I watched as the pout came a bit more visible, his hand squeezed mine again and I took that as a sign to do something that I thought he was asking for. He used to do this all the time, pouting his lips when he wanted a kiss, I leaned down and very gently placed a tender kiss to those plump lips that always moulded against mine so perfectly.

As I pressed my lips to his own, I heart the heart beat monitor beep quicker, I looked up once I pulled back, the pout faded into a small smile and his heart rate dropped back to normal. I shook my head as I sat back down and got under my blanket to get some sleep. I moved the chairs closer to Jonghyun's bed so I could be closer to him.

"J..Jjong your erted idiot, I love you" I whispered one last time before I snuggled down.  I laid my head next to Jonghyun's, it felt so right being this close to the man I loved so dearly.

I felt his steady breath ghost over my skin and it made me so happy and safe. I felt his hand squeeze mine one last time but this time it was a little harder and it lasted longer. I took that as a sign that he still loved me and cared for me even though I didn't deserve it. Hopefully this was the start for us to get back together and rebuild our relationship again as our love never died.

A/N Hello lovelies ^^

Thank you to everyone that subscribed already <3

I hope this didn't disappoint ><

Comment, Subscribe and Enjoy :3 <33

I will see you all soon :D

P.S OMG WHO ELSE HIS DEAD FROM JONGKEY TODAY O.O KEY SAID "WATCH OUT BABE" TO JONGYUN IN ENGLISH O.O THE CLIP HAS KILLED ME A THOUSAND TIMES ALREADY O.O I will link the vine here for everyone to watch, fan girl and die over XD

Jongkey being super cute (clicky the linkif you dare ;D)

P.S Puppy biting (marking) his Kibummie :3