“I’m…I’m sorry…could you repeat what you just said?” My breathing hitched. I waited for what seemed like ages for the person on the other end to reply. I could feel my heart begin to race as my blood pounded against my skin.

“She was in a car accident. It…it was a hit and run. She was on her way home from night school.”

“A hit-,” I stopped for a moment. My voice became hoarse at the feel of my throat begin to swell. Despite the cracking, I made an effort to continue, “You said a hit and run?”

How many years had it been since I last saw her? I couldn’t even remember. Memories instantly came flooding into my head despite the clenching pain I was already feeling in my head. There were many things I didn’t want to relive inside me. Did she still look the same? Of course she would have. She was always so beautiful.

My thoughts were put on hold at the sound of her mother wailing in the background. “The funeral is in three days, son. I know you two hadn’t seen each other in years…but, you were always on her mind. Take it from me; she never shut up about you. I think she was still waiting for you to keep that promise she never told me about.”

If I hadn’t felt bad then I did now. A wave of guilt overtook my senses. I could only stand in the middle of the living room while my body began to shut down on me. My eyes flickered over to a familiar picture I had still managed to keep after all these years. I stared at the two friends that once were; at the man I once was.

I mumbled an agreement before bidding him goodbye. My legs felt like jelly as I made my way over to the old photograph. A reminiscent smile spread across my lips upon further inspection of the picture. The cheerful smile she graced sent shivers down my spine. Her eyes were lit up with life as she gripped my neck lightly. My hands held her thighs firmly against my waist. We were so happy back then—so carefree. But we were children at that time. Naïve children who knew nothing of the world and its raging emotions like jealousy.

 “You were still waiting? Even after all that we had been through. You stupid girl, you didn’t keep your end of the promise.”

“Hey, what are you doing, you stupid girl! If you don’t get down from there you’re going to fall face first!” The boy watched his friend sit happily on a thick tree branch that shook lightly against the warm summer’s wind.

“I’m not gonna fall, stupid!” He glared at her cheeky smile.

“Yes you are! That branch is going to snap in two because you’re so fat. It would be able to hold your weight.” Her eyes instantly glazed over. He regretted the words that had carelessly spilled from his mouth.

“Go away. You’re always so mean to me.” Crystal like tears cascaded down her flushed cheeks. “Hey…hey don’t be like that. You know I have to take care of you. Your parents will yell at us if you get hurt.”

“I don’t care. I would rather get hurt by falling off this tree than by your mean words.” He bit his lip in embarrassment. “You don’t mean that.” She sniffed in disagreement. “Yes I do. You’re just a stupid boy.”

Anger resurfaced in his bones. He grabbed the nearest twig and threw it in the girl’s direction. “Fine then, fall off that tree…see if I care.” As soon as he began to walk away the sound of wood cracking infiltrated his ears. Instinctively he sprinted towards the falling girl. A shriek escaped . She looked down at the soft ‘material’ that had broken her fall. She gasped at the sight of her friend’s state.

“Are you okay? I’m sorry!” He grunted in response. She remained on top of him, both bodies breathing heavily at the rush of adrenalin. A worried expression pained her face at the sight of blood running down his cheek. “You’re bleeding! Why did you save me?” He groaned in pain. “Can’t. Breathe.” He choked out.

Her eyes grew sad once more. “I’m sorry…I forgot…” Before she could lift herself up from him he gripped her waist stopping her from moving any further. “I was only kidding. Why are you such a stupid girl?”

“Why are you always so mean? Jerk! Bleed to death then.” Despite his grip she managed to free herself. The sound of crunching grass filled his ears. He gazed at the blue sky before him. An exhausted huff grumbled from his chest before he picked himself up to go after the girl. He winced, limping as fast as possible to catch up with her. He took hold of her wrist and brought her to his chest. “You know I would never let you get hurt.”

“But you’re the one who hurts me.”

“Yeah, but you know I’m only teasing you, stupid. I promise I’ll always protect you—no matter what.” She quizzically eyed him, her chin resting on his chest. “How are you gonna do that?”

“If I have to marry you to protect you then I will. If you’re my wife then I can protect you all I want because we’ll live together.”

“But I don’t want to marry you.” He glared down at her, “Why not?”

“Because I don’t love you, stupid.”

“Liar. You love me and I love you too. That’s why I’m going to marry you when we grow up.” He smiled proudly at his future plans.

She shook her head, “Why don’t I get a say? I want to marry whoever I want.”

“Ugh, fine. You can marry whoever you want, but that’s going to make it harder for me to protect you.”

Her head tilted to the side. The breeze provided a comfortable atmosphere for the embracing kids. “Why? I’ll tell my husband you can live with me.” He smiled clearly satisfied with her answer.

“You have to make me a promise too.”

“Okay. What is it?”

He held out his pinky before her, “promise you won’t get into any danger. You have to stay safe when you’re not around me, got it?” She nodded enthusiastically.

“Okay! I promise I won’t climb any trees.” They sealed their promise with an innocent kiss on the lips. She stared blankly at the boy before him, not quite sure with what he had just done. “…What-what’d you do that for?” He shrugged his shoulders as he began to walk back to their house. “I don’t know. My dad does it to my mom when they promise each other stuff.”

--

I probably looked like I was on some sort of drugs to the person sitting next to me. I couldn’t shake off the anxiety I was feeling. My eyes wandered around the train cart before resting them onto the view outside the window.

I adjusted my sunglasses on my face before leaning back into my chair. My eyes hurt so much. They were swollen from all the crying I had been doing. That’s one of the reasons why I decided not to drive to the funeral. I don’t think I’m emotionally in the right place.

“I know you two hadn’t seen each other in years…but, you were always on her mind. Take it from me; she never shut up about you. I think she was still waiting for you to keep that promise she never told me about.”

A sigh escaped my lips. The guy next to me kept giving me weird looks. I was numb enough not to care about my surroundings.

What is it about death that makes you realize what you had? Why can’t we know what we have before they’re out of our grasp? Why did I have to regret the way things ended after it became impossible to fix it?

I clenched my sore eyes tightly hoping that the pressure might alleviate the pain at least a little, but I knew no amount of pressure would ever get rid of this pain. I just wanted to yell at her. I wanted to yell and nag and call her stupid like when we were kids. I wanted to tell her that she was still as clumsy as ever.

Always getting physically hurt. Always getting her heart broken.

--

“Why are you mad?” She shifted under his spiteful gaze.

“How am I supposed to help you with that?”

“…but you said you’d always protect me. You…promised.” In sheer anger he threw the nearest object towards a tree. “I can’t beat up every guy that breaks your heart.”

Her gaze grew sad; she rested her eyes on the grass they stood on. “I wasn’t asking you to.”

“Good, because I don’t have time to just sit here next to you and watch you date all of these guys.” His voice grew softer. In an almost inaudible whisper he said, “I can’t.”

She called out his name softly, afraid of what his reaction might be. “I’m not seven anymore. If it’s too much trouble for you then…just know that I can take care of myself. I’m Twenty years-old. I think I’ll manage a broken heart or two.”

“That’s fine with me. Who would want to look after a stupid girl like you?” She smiled, her lips pressed against his cheek timidly causing him to flush. He could feel his heart begin to race. “Stupid boy, no one asked you do it.”

She proceeded to walk away only to be stopped by a hand grasping her wrist. He pleadingly looked up at her, afraid of what her answer might be. Afraid of how rejection might feel.

“I can still keep my original promise. Do you remember?” He waited impatiently for her answer. All he wanted was for her to let him love her the way he wanted to. He wanted to marry her just like he had said when they were seven. The moment his lips met hers all those years ago he knew very well that she was the only one for him.

“No…I don’t remember.”

“Right…”

“Hey, don’t worry about it. You should get going. Doesn’t your train leave in a couple of hours? Are you excited? I bet you’re going to break so many hearts at your university just like you did back in high school.”

“I wasn’t the only one who broke hearts.”

--

“Thank you so much for coming to the funeral, son.” I nodded solemnly. The pressure on my back from his hand felt comforting. I almost felt guilty. He was the one who needed comforting…not me. Why should I be the one comforted? I was only her friend, nothing more, nothing less.

“We reserved a seat for you on the front row by the rest of the family.” I was a little taken aback with his hospitality. After all, I hadn’t seen the man in years; it made me sort of uncomfortable to say the least.

“I…sir, you didn’t have to do that.”

“Of course I did. You would have eventually become family. Go up there. You’re going to have to find the will to be able to see her laying there.” I could feel my body lower in temperature. My hands became clammy as I made my way closer to the empty seat at the end of the row. The closer I got the more it felt like I was walking through treading water. It had suddenly gotten quite hard to swallow; my throat was way too dry.

With shaky breaths I sat stiffly in the awaiting chair. Not long after did a man sit across the chair that sat to the wall from me. I could tell from my peripheral vision that he was eyeing me. Today wasn’t a day to test my patience. With a stern look I turned my attention to him catching him off guard in the process.

“So you’re the guy she refused me for.” I didn’t really understand what he was talking about. I must have had less patience than I thought because I really just wanted to give him a punch in the gut and call it a day.

“Excuse me?” Still, I tried my best to act civilized.

“You’re always getting angry easily. Lighten up or you’ll die young.”

I shook my head hoping to shake away our old conversations. The last thing I wanted to do was remember anything.

“Yeah, she was always talking about you. I asked her to marry me countless times, even bought her all these unwanted gifts and she still refused me. Said she was only going to marry one man and that was the boy who had told her so when they were seven. Seeing as you’re sitting in that chair and you look nothing like her I’m assuming it must be you.”

My vision began to blur. I could feel my heart swell with ache. I stumbled over to her coffin. The room grew silent as they watched my every move.

“You…you liar…you said you didn’t remember. You said it probably didn’t matter. Stupid girl, why would you do that? You knew how much I loved you.” My legs gave out. I could feel a bruise forming on my knees from the sheer force. My swollen lips began to tremble. I probably looked like an idiot, sobbing uncontrollably while gripping the edge of the coffin. My fingertips grew white from the force. I didn’t care. I didn’t care how pitiful I looked. How could I knowing what I knew now?

“Wake up. You have to wake up. You promised, you promised you stupid boy.” My head shot up in the voice’s direction. I looked around the now empty room, but found nothing.

“I told you not to save me. You wouldn’t be laying here if it wasn’t for my clumsiness. It should have been me. Why did you push me out of the way? No one asked you to save me, stupid.” I could feel pressure on both sides of my shoulders.

“You jerk, always being mean and making me cry. Wake up. You said you were going to marry me. You promised.”

I opened my sore eyes to a beautiful sight. There she was, the girl I had always loved, crying her pretty little eyes out for me. Her sobs grew louder. She instantly hugged me, wetting my neck with the tears that just kept coming out.

Was this real life?

I called out her name softly. My voice cracked in the process. She smiled teary eyed and all. My shaky hand slowly reached for her flushed cheeks. She leaned into my cold hand. “Liar.” She glared at me, “What?”

“You said you didn’t remember. Back when I asked you if you remembered me asking you to marry me…you said you didn’t remember.”

“I can’t just forget a promise like that.” She softly admitted. Her teeth bit down on her bottom flesh. I pulled it out of with my finger. “Stop biting your lip. What man is going to want to kiss you if you have ugly lips?” I suppressed the laugh at her cute pout. “There’s plenty men who would be willing to kiss me.”

“Oh yeah? Then what are you waiting for? Go kiss your willing men.” I know I shouldn’t have been jealous…I mean, I had just woken up from what will be the worst nightmare of my life.

“I can’t.”

“Why can’t you? I’m not stopping you.” She sat on the edge of the hospital bed I was laying in. “I’m waiting for this stupid boy to keep his promise and marry me.” I used whatever force I had in me and pulled her down to my chest. Our noses met for an Eskimo kiss.

“Who would ever want to marry such a stupid girl?” I could feel her lips curl into a knowing smile against mine. “Only a boy that's as stupid as me.”

Fin

 I originally wrote this for a friend. It's still in the works. The piece I give her will probably be better than this! XD