author note ; 

years ago , i published this story and as a habit i wrote a drafts that were never released , this chapter was written at 2015 when i actively published this story and now i feel guilty to just throw the draft away , which i found with pure chance 

Although i was young , the story was thin grounded and the chapter is average .. I'll leave this chapter here as i consumed my time once writing this 

I proof read some parts of the chapter and not the whole thing , so i hope it's okay as it is 

 

Enjoy the read :) * hides behind phone *

 

--------------

 

i was on my way to the airport leaving for japan , promoting our new SNSD Japanese single ..

rehearsing for the new choreography stole most of my time , and that's precisely what made me thankful for having such a job , being busy helps me clear my mind from those confusing thoughts about some unwanted events , people and encounters .. 

 

just once in while when i'm sitting in the van shuffling songs on repeat while my mind is somewhere else thinking of anything and everything except those lyrics and melody i'm listening to .. 

 

the thing is ... i will never ever visit that creepy's studio or whatever , why would i do it anyway when i'm not even interested ! he's trying to hypnosis me with his own weird assumptions !! honestly i don't want to be involved with such a man , being celebrity or not , he's weird and creepy  

 

" oppa .. " i called my manager who was driving the van after i removed my headphones

 

" what is it , seohyun~ah ? " 

 

" that day at Ferrum tower , why did you ask me to go all the way to the aquarium although my unnies weren't there ! " i asked my manager confused , yonghwa said creepy things about persuading whoever he needs to persuade .. which is a little scary 

 

" ah about that ... " he paused thinking about it for a moment , he continued " that young guy asked me a favor " 

 

" and you just accepted it , that easily !! " i raised my eyebrows angry and confused 

 

" seohyun~ah , i had a talk with the guy and i liked him " he said nodding , " i knew he's the one from that day too when you went to your date with hakyeon .. you might hate me for acting like this without your permission but i thought it was the right thing to do " 

 

i was stunned and speechless . what did he do to my manager exactly , did he hypnosis him too !! 

 

he continued " he asked me a favor and i couldn't turn him down " 

 

" what kind of favor ? " 

 

my manager said with a serious tone  " he said - you've always protected seohyun so i'm sure whoever cares about her is thankful to you , but it's time for her to live , face the world , be happy and loved or even confused and get hurt , in the end it's her chance to write her own story - he's such a smart dongsaeng " 

 

" so he really did hypnosis you after all " i murmured as i let out a sigh , again he's using poetic words as a weapon ,  " i'm just okay with the way i live right now , so don't worry about it and forget about that paparazzi's words " 

 

my manager shouted as he turned around looking at me " what !! he's a paparazzi ??? " , he got aware of his dangerous reaction so he adjusted his glance back on the road 

 

i sighed more heavily  

 

" yes he is , a really creepy one to be exact , i thought you said you talked with him a lot " i said calmly rolling my eyes , that yonghwa is such a headache

 

" i thought he was just a photographer but never knew he would be a paparazzi .. i'm sorry " my manager apologized with a depressed sipirt 

 

" it's okay , he's just playing around " i said it with assuring smile .. he's just playing around for sure 

 

" we're already here , your unnies are ready too " my manager said getting my attention , we already arrived the airport ! 

 

idols LOVE airports , you choose your outfit carefully , get the attention you're asking for ! and let the whole world admire your fashion .. 

 

i stepped out of my van with confidence , i personally liked the one piece knee length dress i was wearing , channel white bag , my ginger wavy hair was done at the salon in morning  .. i was more than ready for the press pictures that time at least .. 

 

i lead SNSD unnies walking toward the check in gates , it was overcrowded with reporters holding their professional cameras and taking multiple pictures with the light speed , fans too with their phone's caught pictures and videos of me and surely they will keep it up until capturing the whole SNSD photos set .. 

 

yonghwa was there too , i barely recognized his face that was hid behind his professional heavy camera with a long distance lens , taking multiple shots of me , but i was able to get the yonghwa's unique vibe from him , with his simple fashion and gorgeous slender fingers , he looked serious working on his photography session so i couldn't fool myself with thinking he was here for me  .. but i couldn't hide my excitement either .. 

 

the last thing he said to me was that freaking sappy line which left me restless for days - because you are just like those mermaids curious about how human fall in love - his smug face when he said it haunted me for days ! how in the world me SEO JUHYUN would ever knock his door ! him assuming i would knock his door is hilarious .. so painfully hilarious .. 

 

i wasn't the prettiest woman in korea but i knew that if i put an effort into it , i could draw any man to fall in my charms .. and in a moment the routine run away airport show that i have always done ; turned out into a seducing scene from some black and white classic movie - a confident chaebol lady - should be the main headline for this event .. 

 

i walked past the cameras with confident quick and lady like moves , i passed my fingers in my hair in a chic way as i gave his lens a confident smirk .. 

 

~ later ~ 

 

my unnies walked past the shops in the airport chatting endlessly , while i walked leaning on yoona's small shoulder .. 

 

tiffany and hyoyeon unnie were giggling with excitement 

 

" i'm sure it was him again , maknae's handsome fan " tiffany teased 

 

her loud excited tone surely made it into my ears to get my whole attention , it's so irritating how everyone is just falling for that guy charms , even my male manager .

 

" is he a reporter or just a fan with a pro camera ? " hyoyeon was puzzled by this thought until she glanced me and froze 

 

" don't tell me !!! " hyoyeon stopped walking abruptly and sooyoung & taeyon unnies bumped into her ... 

 

sooyoung frowned " yaah ! don't just stop suddenly in the way " 

 

hyoyeon ignored her , pointing a finger at me " is he that paprazzi that kissed you ? " she shouted 

 

i hardly jumped with my high heels to shut with my hand terrified and looking at everyone passing by us , giving them my sweetest smile .. 

 

tiffany unnie blinked endlessly with a dreamy expression " if he's the one , i can totally understand your story , maknae .. " 

 

if it was a comedy show we are watching together i would have laughed and made fun of the heroine too , but i'm the one involved here , i'm the one who's suffering .. 

 

a hand patted my shoulder assuring , it was tayeon unnie who held my gaze seriously " your unnies are just joking , i know it's a complicated situation , i bet you're confused too " she said and i nodded 

 

she continued " but honestly you're really lucky " 

 

i stared at her speechless , my unnies are totally on his side , everyone is just abandoning me for his sake .. 

 

" you are right ! i'm really lucky " i pasted a yellow smile on my face

 

sooyoung who was crossing her arms and watching us for a while now started talking " but seriously , aren't paparazzi just following everyone around " 

 

i looked at her and gulped , i thought that she was really going to say the thoughts that scared me the most 

 

she continued " i mean , isn't he just doing his work and having a crush here and there once in a while " 

 

my unnies were quiet listening to her , nodding slightly in agreement .. i knew the truth all along anyway ..

 

although yuri's fingers were totally busy chatting on phone , she added " anyone would have had fallen for you if he got the chance to follow you around , he might be a little brave and dashing compared to other men whose around you , but that doesn't make him any better than them .. " 

 

i hardly gulped as i heard the words which totally satisfied my logical thinking , however i thought about it that paparazzi story wasn't my kind of story , he wasn't my kind of man either .. if i've always avoided half-hearted and non-sense love lines , i should avoid this one too .. 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

we arrived japan 1:00 p.m and went directly to a restaurant to dine , after this unnies went in groups to stroll the streets and enjoy shopping , we returned our apartment later and rested for a while .. 

 

by the evening , everyone were doing their thing and relaxing getting ready for tomorrow's schedule .. 

 

i went out of shower to find my phone ringing non stop , i took a look at the caller and it was SM's secretary calling me .. 

 

i answered the call curious " hello , seohyun is talking " 

 

" seohyun-ssi , i got you a really good news " he shouted in excitment

 

a little painful on my ears , i respectfully asked " really ? " 

 

" guess what ! you got the movie's role already , it's a second lead role but the movie will be a hit " 

 

" wow really ! i'm really thankful  " i said happily and bowed several times to his voice 

 

then i asked " so who will be the main lead ? " 

 

" they didn't decide yet , but once you come back , we will discuss the details " he said professionally and i nodded 

 

 i hang up and went running toward the living room , i knew i was a novice actress so i didn't expect that coming although i heard a hint from the director but couldn't believe it that time .. 

the director went to my latest musical and praised my acting and asked me if i could join his upcoming movie but i never thought he was talking seriously 

 

" i got the role !! " i exclaimed and unnies jumped in celebration 

 

" we have to celebrate this " sooyoung said 

 

" spicy chicken and beer !! who's in ? " sunny suggested and my unnies agreed 

 

i glanced my watch and it was past 9:00 p.m 

 " i can't eat this late anyway , i have to be in shape for the movie " 

 

" nothing will happen from once in a while evening snack , don't be hard on yourself " yoona said 

 

hyoyeon unnie added seriously  " we're really proud of you , so we have to celebrate tonight .. our precious maknae "

 

i got a little emotional and smiled warmly , but asked anyway " so whose gonna go to the shop and buy us the snacks ? " 

 

in a moment all the glances were directed at me , i opened my mouth in a shock " huh ?? " 

 

" just go maknae , you have to exercise for the sake of the new movie " yuri unnie said and my unnies couldn't agree more with her 

 

~~~~~~~

 

i walked in the street with heavy steps , wearing a hoodie and sweatpants , my hair styled into a pony tail   .. although it was a foreign country but i knew this neighborhood well , as we always rent SNSD apartment in the same complex for years now .. 

 

the street was quiet and depended mainly on the full  moon illumination to light up my way , it was an easy task to blend into the scenery unnoticed , i was confident that i hadn't drawn much attention with the help of my casual style and dimmed street , yet i had a strong feeling that i'm being tailed by someone , just like that time when i was followed by yonghwa .

 

as the thought hit me hard , i turned around suddenly to find him actually following me ! 

 

i froze for a moment in a shock before i stutter " you were in k..korea earlier "

 

" you were in korea earlier too " he said with a playful glance , RIGHT ! 

 

seeing him my feelings wavered between shock , excitement and agony .. 

i wasn't the type to try out men and be happy for instant not caring about the next moment , i wanted something deeper , eternal and assuring .. and yonghwa wasn't the one who could afford what i wanted so i knew i shouldn't get addicted to his presence in my life .. 

i had to revise my dating life motto ~ non sense stories should be avoided ~  

 

i turned around calmly and went my way , his shadow followed me quietly - creepy - ! i stopped again abruptly and turned around glaring at him and frowning 

 

" why are you following me ! " 

 

he wasn't getting affected by whatever thing i said as if he predicted it all , he replied " following you , is the only way i can be with you without your permission " 

 

~ nothing about him make sense ~ 

 

it took me a moment frowning and thinking deeply about it - so what's for today ? - i wanted to ask 

 

but said instead with a mocking tone " i thought you were waiting for me to COME TO YOU in your place , but now i see that you stepped down to my level and following me around again " 

 

the thing is .. if i was effected by him the other day that would be because i allowed it to happen ..

 

his glance admired my fake smirk and smiled " i did say that i'll wait for you in my studio whenever you are ready , but i didn't say anything about stopping following you " 

 

~ and that racing heart of mine doesn't make sense either ~

 

" right , because it's your job following people around " i said it with a mean tone , i wasn't mocking his job but my own uncertainty about his intentions 

 

he stared at me and froze speechless , i got worried if my words were harsh .. 

he looked over his shoulder before his hands reach for his bag and by the next moment his camera was already between his hands ! started on and ready to capture whatever in his mind 

 

i frowned in confusion , why the camera now 

 

he calmly made the statement " we're followed , someone is watching us  " 

 

i was shocked for a moment ! another paparazzi again ! i sighed in disbelief and massaged my temples - what if i was caught with yonghwa as a scandal 

 

he continued as he swung his camera  " don't worry about scandals , he already got that i'm a paparazzi too .. so just keep walking " 

 

his words were confident and assuring , although he looked young but he got a flawless charisma  

 

i nodded and turned around and walked a few steps , but i couldn't shake off the feeling of being watched over , not by one but two paparazzi 

 

" yonghwa-ssi " i called him as i kept walking 

 

" what is it ? " 

 

" i can't relax being followed , can't you just hang out with him instead " i suggested as i got the idea , they have the same job and same prey so i'm sure they'll get along quickly and leave me alone 

 

" he's not my friend . plus , why should you worry about him ! it's not like you are going for a date tonight ? " his tone wavered between curiosity and confirming  

 

" who knows " i said with a smirk teasing him as i walked

 

" mmmm with this kind of effortless style of yours , i guess you're going out for a late night snacks at most  " he said and i stopped walking and turned around abruptly looking at him frowning  .. snacks !!! i think it's obvious after all , me walking at night in a foreign country with this style ..  

 

" i'll help you lose him " he said seriously then screened the surroundings with a glance for a moment

 

" first , cross the road in the last 2 seconds of the green pedestrian light carefully " 

 

" are you trying to kill me ! " 

 

" that's why i said - carefully -" he giggled and continued " get a table in that restaurant and sit facing the wall , wait for me there and i'll tell you the rest of the plan later " 

 

i crossed my arms thinking about it then i asked unconvinced " why can't you just tell me the whole plan now ? " 

 

he held my gaze  " i'm using the plan as an excuse to have a dinner with you "  

 

i held my breath for a moment wondering if i should really give him the chance to , if i really want to avoid him why would i spend more time with him .. 

 

i shook my head and used a firm tone " i'm sorry , i'm not the sociable type so i don't really get along with strangers , i don't have time to play around either and for sure i'm not willing to feed up your weird assumptions by accepting your invitation " 

 

 

i turned around walking my way .. it's not my intention acting mighty and hard to get but yonghwa wasn't a good choice either , a relationship with him will never go anywhere .. 

 

" i'll answer whatever question you have in mind " he shouted with a pleading tone , and i loved how he finally lost his temper .. i stopped my next step and a smirk twisted my lips  

 

he deepened his tone and murmured " i'm not asking nor expecting anything from you , so just give me the chance to get closer to you " 

 

i was never the type to get affected by men's pleading words , i easily detached myself and slipped away from any probability to be linked to a man .. people could name my actions as being - cold - but for me , i did it intentionally so i wouldn't get cold emotionally later ..

 

i thought thrice before dating any man , and i would always find the flaws and the shorts in their characters , circumstances and sincerity .. not that i'm perfect but i wanted to save my raw emotions , heart flutters for the right one and only man rather than getting drowned in the infinite circle of dating and breaking up !! 

 

as i got older , rumors flooded the entertainment society about me , it ranged from seohyun is a smart cold hearted woman , un interested in love and finally that i was a woman who dissed  men .. 

 

a man may fall for my charms from a distance but once we share a table and a drink he quickly shrugs in his seat in awkwardness  .. 

 

nothing about my character was captivating , and the mental stress to prove them wrong ends up in more and more awkwardness .. an infinite circle that i've always craved to break without me getting broken in the process 

 

i turned around and took his advice waiting for the last 2 seconds to cross the street , i counted quietly ..

 

at the right timing , i crossed the street toward the restaurant he mentioned earlier .. 

 

i have always thought , but with yonghwa i just acted ! he looked confident and trust worthy, so i forgot my fears and went with the flow 

 

the restaurant had a heavy woody door and small windows , with minimal illumination and a lot of hidden corners - it felt shady and isolated but cozy and warm , and as a matter of fact a perfect place for spending a private time without being spotted easily , i choose a table facing the wall and sat down .. waiting for him i got worried about my effortless appearnce so i used my phone as a mirror checking out my look - random - served me right .. 

my bare face , pony tail and sweatshirt influenced the concept but why should i care , if he was fascinated by the idol seohyun then it's for him to get bored with the bare awkward seo juhyun .. 

 

i heard the heavy door moving so i turned around to glance the customer , and it was yonghwa entering , the waiter recognized and approached him .. they threw greetings and then yonghwa proceeded to the 'staff only' area ... 

 

i wasn't sure if i should get fascinated by his endless connections or get scared that wherever place i step a foot into ends up under his control even in foreign countries .. i was buzzled what does he give to those connections in return ? 

 

he returned and slid into the vacant chair in front of me with a wide smile , his gaze flickered with excitement so i found my self smiling too

 

" so what's the rest of the plan ? " i asked 

 

" which plan ? " he acted clueless and i chuckled , he's cute indeed 

 

" so did i lose him ? the paparazzi " i asked casually 

 

" what paparazzi !? " he acted clueless again and i froze in disbelief , was he LYING ?! did he made up the paparazzi story to get me here !! i got a painful stab in my chest for falling for such a joke , i hated that i trusted him and my eyes flickered with a mist of betrayal anger  

 

i stood up abruptly to leave , he caught my wrist " he's still out there by the way , and the rest of the plan : that we can use the backdoor for this restaurant "  

 

my head was heavy with confusion , what's true and what's a lie and he's professionally good in acting .. i glared at him with suspicion so he started on his camera and showed me the LCD screen with a picture of the paparazzi waiting outside the restaurant and i glanced the date info and it was indeed today and now ... 

 

my eyes were lost in the picture details in confusion so he said " i know we had trust issues and you have a quick temper so i caught an evidence for you  , just in case " 

 

i looked at him with steady eyes, changing my plan " so what does it have to do with me using the restroom " 

 

he let go of my wrist and i walked away toward the restroom ! i was at the edge of mentally breaking down and crying for no logical reason .. he's talking about trust issues while i nearly fainted from the shock because i trusted him so much .. 

 

i blamed myself for being such a naive serious woman who gets fooled easily with his mere words !! 

 

minuets later i went back to him , and the table was already prepared for dining with raw meat and appetizers , sake included too 

 

i sat on my chair quietly not daring to glance him , i busied my self with my chopsticks 

" so how long would a paparazzi wait outside usually ? " 

 

" it depends , he might wait up to 8 hours and if he was short in money he might wait for a whole day " he said seriously as he offered me to pour sake in my glass 

 

" oh such a serious job " i said mocking as i held his gaze challenging 

  

" thanks for the compliment " he flashed me a smile 

 

" how do you keep a track of all celebrities where about ! i mean their private moves ? " i asked curious , like an interview i started pouring my questions 

 

" their loyal fans tell me " he answered 

 

surprised i shouted " what the hell do they get in return ! "

 

" info about their private lives , it's a win win condition so calm down " 

 

i palmed my face in actual pain " whenever i'm with you , i end up saying the rudest things "  

 

he laughed out loud and toned it down with a warm smile staring at me with sparkling eyes that gave me the chill " rather than -lady seohyun- , the arrogant you is much more interesting " 

 

" so you think classy seohyun is boring , awkward ?! " i asked such a pathetic question , she's boring indeed 

 

" does your perfection make you that insecure "  

 

i gulped with a solemn expression " i thought you were gonna answer for today " 

 

" classy seohyun isn't boring , she's stunning and intelligent " he said and i shifted my glance away unconvinced , i let out a soft sigh at those familiar words which i heard non stop 

 

he continued " however , she makes people insecure ... " 

 

that was enough to get my attention again 

 

he continued " insecure about getting closer to her , insecure about their own imperfections " 

 

" and you're the only one in the world whose confident when being with me !? " i said with a mocking tone , i think i'm finally able to read his hypnosis lines now 

 

" no , i'm insecure too .. " he said seriously as he held my gaze , he continued with a challenging tone " but i've never been a scaredy cat when it comes to my insecurities " 

 

he said he's insecure but why is he oozing with confidence in the moment 

 

" you deserve a man who would love you regardless " 

 

I countered " but it doesn't have to be you " 

 

He nodded helplessly " it doesn't have to be me .." 

 

i was going to regret my insensitive comment when he continued " but it's going to be Me " 

 

I snickered in disbelief at his ungrounded confidence " i already asked you to stop that super ego tone of yours " 

 

When did it ever occure that a celebrity had a relationship with her/his paparazzi , never happened not even in fairytales 

 

" i promise you i will " he said

 

 

my heart raced and i gulped my nervousness, i concentrated on eating , the meat instantly melt in my mouth with a strong taste " mmmm delicious " , i wish he would stop staring at me in that cheesy way soon 

 

i glanced his camera on the table as i talked " out of curiosity i've read books about paprazzi " 

 

 i gazed at him and continued " however , when i tried to understand their point of view .. they were either stalkers by nature so they fed their curiosity about people's personal lives " 

 

he nodded in agreement slightly 

 

i continued " and others were short in money so they worked as freelance paparazzi , unemployed but gets money by capturing people's weaknesses " 

 

he nodded again in agreement 

 

my heart throbbed as i asked seriously " so which one are you ? the stalker or the gold digger ? " 

 

he has always predicted what i wanted to say and prepared a smart answer right away but this time he quietly received my question and silence stretched between us .. 

 

" neither of them " he finally replied , he continued seriously " you can't really learn about people intentions by just reading books everyone has their own story and reasons and they don't get the chance to write their own books .. " 

 

i was curious about his reasons so i asked " so is there a good reason for being a paparazzi ? " 

 

" no , i think there are none " his voice cracked as he confirmed the ugly truth 

 

although we were strangers , but my heart got heavy with disappointment for him , for me , for what i thought could be beautiful between us in the future , i was willing to give him the chance to prove his humanity , that he had a good reason for intruding people's privacy , for exposing their wounds with no mercy , my voice tinged with disappointment as i said " so you're a bad guy after all ! "  

 

" you can't really categorize people into bad and good , a moment you're an angel the next you're the devil .. you think you got the world between your hands a moment , then the other you are stepped down on and broken " he explained eagerly for me to understand , that it's alright to be someone with no morals 

 

i couldn't help my face frowning " isn't that just an excuse " 

 

" it could be an excuse " he said it with a gloomy smirk , his confusion was translated into aimless chopstick moves  ..

 

although he put up a calm face and arrogant character on display but his inside was shaken with endless confusion ,  it must be scary the world he was thrown into all alone ... you can read about such a man as a character in some suspense novel and be interested , but never get involved with him or entangled in his world ... 

 

he glanced me abruptly with piercing brown eyes as he said " who knows ! maybe sometime later when you move out from your shell and face the world you'll end up making excuses too " 

 

he was creepy enough to invite me  to his adventurous world ! and i was weird enough to fall for his eyes , get curious about whatever he wants to introduce me to .. 

 

" so that was your reason for the weird speech you confused my manager with , convincing him to let me face the bad things in this world or in another words - to meet you - " i said it half joking 

 

" hyung told you after all " he said as he chuckled 

 

" hyung !!!! you have no idea how terrified he was when he found out about you being a paparazzi " 

 

he laughed " yeah that's precisely why i didn't tell him in the first place " 

 

a message arrived on my phone and i checked it out 

 

(( hey mkanae , you're late ! everything is fine ? )) from hyoyeon unnie 

 

i replied (( i met a friend , i'll come back now )) 

 

i placed my phone away and continued eating , but i could sense his curious glance burning a hole in my face , i chewed my rice as i shifted my gaze at him , he quietly stared at me and i couldn't help but to giggle at him 

 

" honestly , i think you're the curious stalker type after all " i commented smiling 

 

he handed me a grilled meat slice with his chopsticks " you are not eating well ... " he said 

 

and i received the meat from him with my chopsticks " oh thank you " i bowed slightly 

 

" for the new movie's sake , right "  he continued casually 

 

i dropped the meat slice in a shock , i froze soulless not daring to believe what i just heard  ..

 

" h .. how did you know about the movie ? " i asked him stuttering ! widening my eyes and staring at him 

 

he casually responded " rumors " 

 

rumors !! when and how ! the role got confirmed just hours ago ! so how in the world did he know ! 

 

i shook my head in disbelief

" so .. by anyway .. do you know who will take the male lead role ? " i stared at him as i asked 

 

" are you using me ? " he asked seriously with a frown 

 

" oh ! no i didn't mean to .. i was just " i got flustered by the sudden accusation 

 

" until now the male lead hasn't been decided  " he said and i nodded , well that was what the secretary told me anyway 

 

he continued " but most probably , jon won will be the one " 

 

" really !!! are you sure ? jon won ! " i exclaimed enthusiastically    

 

he maintained his solemn expression , chewing his food quietly with sorrow " however , he's dating " 

 

my expression abruptly shifted from excitement to a frown " dating or not , why are you telling me this !! " 

 

" you were overly excited and i wanted to burst your bubble " he said it calmly as he poured his soju 

 

" why would you ! " i stared at him in curiosity and my heart throbbed .. 

 

he raised his glance from the soju bottle and held my gaze 

 

" have you heard about - jealousy - before ?! " he said it as if it was the most casual question in the word , just like : how are you or what's for dinner tonight .. 

 

talking with yonghwa was the most critical nerve wrecking experience i've ever had , shamelessly he never cared about filtering his words and he wasn't going to lie either ..

 

i could ask him any question about him , about the world , about anyone -me included - and he'll surely give an answer easily .. 

 

there's no guarantee what i'll hear from him in the next moment , whatever he got in his mind he'll say it .. 

 

 i fixed my elbow on table and supported my chin as i smiled in confusion " being creepy , following me around , ordering me to knock your door and finally giving me a hint of your miserable life and your obsessive traits.. you're just proving my point of view - i'll never fall for you - " 

 

" thankfully , falling in love isn't up to you " he said with sincere smile 

 

" be assured my heart is under control !! " i said challenging and he chuckled 

 

 

" Seohyun-ssi .. how do you fall in love , with your brain or heart ? " 

 

" we fall in love with our brain " i answered confidently  

 

he smiled as he said " however , falling in love with your brain doesn't mean calculating a thousand reasons to fall for the perfect someone ... " 

 

he continued " it never works like this , because you can like someone for a thousand reasons, but you'll never assort a single reason for loving someone " 

 

i hated myself for using my brain when it comes to love , i craved to fall recklessly blindly in love just like everyone , novels , movies and songs which have always described love as a heart flutters , stomach butterflies , but nothing about the brain , they've never discussed it .. 

 

i looked at yonghwa and asked " so how do we love with our brain ? " 

 

" chemicals and hormones " he answered solemnly , " and those got nothing to do with your calculations , your brain will just choose someone for you " 

 

i stared at him in disbelief , sometimes he's the most romantic man on earth who acts without thinking , but some other times he'll just over analysis things and make love a non sense extremely casual relationship

 

 

after the dinner , we passed through the kitchen backdoor and lost the paparazzi that tailed us earlier .. 

 

my dorm was two blocks away so he naturally tagged along and walked me home .. 

 

i arrived my building so i threw him a glance not sure if i should thank him for tonight or just glare at him , however he helped me to assort my emotions with his last lines 

 

" hyun~ah " he called me before i push my lobby glass door , i turned around glaring at him 

 

he continued casually " remember that freud's theory of super ego , i'm sure you heard about it at school " 

 

" super ego theory !! " i creased my brows in confusion , i meant his inflated ego that gets on my nerves but which theory is he talking about .. i frowned more as i tried to remember 

 

if we're talking about super ego in psychiatry it means - the ethical part of your personality that provide moral standards for your acts - so ... 

 

i gasped in a shock and he chuckled " exactly ! " 

 

 " so as i promised i'll stop with the super ego tone and start talking in banmal , from now on you are my hyun~ah "  he winked mischievously and took steps to leave 

 

" hey you ! wait !! " i shouted irritated 

 

he continued walking backward as he shouted " i'll wait for you in korea , hyun~ah " 

 

he's a freak ! he's really a freak !! 

 

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~ two days later ~ SNSD dorm ~ 6:00 p.m 

 

i flipped another page of the movie's script .. 

the story was interesting and i got excited for this project , it was an action movie about a police man ( the main lead ) who killed an old man by accident in the process of catching a prisoner who ran away in the end .. 

however the police man got depressed about it , his colleague ( me ) and his fiancée ( yun eunhye ) suppoerted him to pass the depression .. 

anyway later , the son of the man who was killed by accident wanted to get his revenge from the police man , so he threatened to kill both the girls in the police man's life , so the whole movie he'll try to protect them both .. anyway he'll end up with losing one of the two girls .. and the writer said according to the chemistry he'll decide later which girl will live in the end .. 

 

i put down the script on the bed , and opened the drawer of the light stand beside me .. 

i reached for a small box and opened it .. 

 

i stared at the aquamarine gem , and it looked more beautiful and breath taking the longer i stared at it .. it was the most precious gift i have ever got , i traced my index over it lightly and my heart raced .. not sure if i've fallen for the story or for the man who told the story .. 

 

the door bell rang once , and the living room got noisy with my unnies excited shouts 

 

i put back the gemstone in place and went to check out the scene .. 

 

a flowers and chocolate was the main objects that brought my lovely unnies into one spot , no one cared about the flowers the whole attention was directed to the swiss chocolate that looked expensive enough to get their admiration .. 

 

" whose the fabulous man who sent this ?  " sooyoung unnie asked as her hands worked on sloughing the chocolate box wrap - literally sloughing - 

 

yuri read the card silently and then announced " for my hyun~ah <3 " 

 

" hyun~ah who ! " sooyoung frowned in confusion , my unnies took a moment revising the members' profiles in their head before yoona point a finger at me 

 

" SEOHYUN !! " she exclaimed and my unnies were shocked 

 

that moment i felt like i was a maid girl from a fairy tale who got the prince's attention so my unnies glared at me in envy 

 - cinderella - would serve the situation right ! 

 

i took out the card from yuri's unnie hand and read it .. 

 

(( day 1 .... i will         )) to my hyun~ah 

 

that's it !! one word - i will ! - 

rather than getting the romantic chills from receiving flowers and chocolate , i got goose bumps as i got aware that he's really CREEPY .. 

 

after that day , he sent flowers to my dorm every single day , accompanied with a unique gift that made my unnies squirrel in happiness , sometimes he would send macaron , wine , and much more ... he kept it classy with a feminine preference .. 

 

and i was getting more burdened day after day by those ridiculous gifts , however the one word he sent in day 1 was followed by single word each single day 

 

(( day 1 - i will )) 

(( day 2 - keep )) 

(( day 3 - sending )) 

(( day 4 - flowers ))

(( day 5 - until ))   

(( day 6 - you )) 

(( day 7 - come )) 

 

it took me a one week to get his crazy threat , day 8 he sent the flowers with no card attached so i got that he'll never stop until i go .. 

 

and that would never ever happen 

 

 

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next chapter ~ yonghwa studio ~ 

 

seohyun sat on the edge of her seat worried , yonghwa who went to the kitchen with excuse - to get her a drink - was late .. 

 

seohyun took a steps toward the direction he went earlier , she found in the kitchen indeed , but talking in the phone .. he gave his back to the door and faced the sink 

 

" yeah i got her  " 

 

seohyun heard him saying so she hid away from the kitchen door eavesdropping the call 

 

" but she doesn't look like she'll be cooperative with us .... eh by force !!! " 

 

" i think it's dangerous , she might report us ... i don't want to end up interrogated in a police station after all " 

 

" i'm not doing this for free you know ... how much ? " 

 

" are you kidding me ! hahaha ok later .. i have a work to do " 

 

seohyun couldn't process the situation but it was scary enough for her to run toward the main door opening it to get out 

 

however just with a split of hair yonghwa closed the door again with his hand 

 

" you can't run away now " 

 

 

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Disclaimer : there will not be a next chapter .

i kept the preview since it was written also years ago ..

i'm working on marriage and benefits story at the moment