Hate school, Hate life

Sometimes I wonder "Why do I even bother?"

I just get so much stress from school and at home to study and get good grades, it just makes me lose concentration on everything. Today my Chemistry teacher got angry at me for not completing my homework and he complained at me how bad my grades was. He said that he's not seeing me put in the effort for getting good grades... So he sent an email to my parents about it. Now my parents have just scolded me for not working hard enough at school. They keep telling me at this rate I'm not going to pass my exams and get into college.

Do they think I enjoy being like this!?

All my teachers are complaining at me to prioritize my work. I'm trying so hard to do so, but it always gets to me. I mean I'm still stressed and upset over my mock exams I did in November. I had a ing panic attack during my Graphic Design exam! In front of hundreds of students, I felt so humiliated and angry.

I also have a deadline for my art coursework tomorrow and I haven't finished it yet... I'm so dead. I just want to disappear. I hate it when all the people in my classes see  me getting scolded by my teachers.

Ah, now my mood swings are kicking in, I'm crying to myself and it doesn't help me with the whole depression and self harm issue I have.

I'm sorry for my rant... I just... I really just want to say my emotions to someone. I feel like I can talk well with you guys. I find it easier to talk to you instead of my family and best friends.

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wookielove #1
Hey, GCSEs are a hard time for everyone, I'm not gonna sugarcoat anything bc I went through them last year. I wanna let you know that you aren't alone in how you feel. You're right it's so much easier talking on here than to friends and family, so I am here to let you know that you deserve all the best wishes from me as I know you're still trying. Chemistry's a mean subject, I failed every single mock I had for it, but just remember that mocks don't always reflect the end result. You can do it, don't worry.
therealdjkhaled #2
hullo :3

dont be embarassed if you find it harder to keep up because every body gets stressed out. i think it might be helpful if you just relaxed and did whatever you like for an hour or so, and then do your school work and study for 30 minutes and relax again for 10 minutes. even if it doesnt seem like that much time its better than not doing anything. and its better to do it while you arent stressed so you can focus. your health is priority and too much stress is bad for you, so dont forget to look after your self. i havnt self harmed in months so if you need any help or advice dont hesitate to message me because I JUST WANNA HUG YOU AND LET YOU KNOW I LOVE YOU in the least strange way.
Cephei #3
Hi <3 You don't know me, but I just wanted to offer you some support anyways. Firstly, I want you to know that you WILL overcome this - believe me. I can understand why you are embarrassed over your panic attack, but please know that it was MONTHS ago and that people probably don't even think about it. The secret is, people generally want you to succeed, but sometimes they don't encourage you in the best of ways... They reprimand you and scold you, but ask yourself: why do they do this? It's because they want you to do well. It seems backwards, I know, but it's also the truth. Your parents are "angry" because they're scared for your future, and that's how people tend to respond to fear - with anger. Your school should have resources where you can talk about your problems; I encourage you to use them. Ask to talk to your teacher after school. Tell him that you're anxious and that you want to do well, and that having him yell at you only perpetuates your anxiety. Your teacher - if he is a good one and genuinely cares about his students - should accommodate you. Best of luck in all your endeavours!
MochiToBe #4
I know what you mean :( School life is REALLY hard ( I'm also at a state where I should be going crazy... ) But don't lose strength and good luck for your exams! Fighting, we can do it! * trying to cheer you up * :D
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