I'm pretty sure some of you guys have filled up college application forms before, and I don't know if you agree with me on this, but these things are SO STRESSFUL.

I get so scared to fill them up. I read them over and over again. Whenever I write something wrong, I feel like crying because of the fear that it would cause my life to shatter. 

I know I'm overreacting. I also know I'm being paranoid, but I just can't shake off the feeling that I forgot to fill a blank on the forms I've already submitted. I don't know if my memory is just being a , showing me the trailer of the next blockbuster horror film, or being helpful like it's supposed to be, warning me to reconsider my life.

I thought it was over after the reccommendation letters, but no. My English teacher said that when she was in college, they told her that if the introduction doesn't work, throw it into the pit of shame. Now, I'm sitting here, not even done with my application form, contemplating on how I would successfully start an essay that answers the question: "Are there any significant experiences you have had, or accomplishments you have realized, that have helped to define you as a person?"

I don't know if this just asked me to deeply evaluate the meaning of life or told me to validate whether I actaully did something with my life or just spent it like a greasy couch potato. I'm scared of it being the latter because being a greasy couch potato is exactly what I did.

Sh also said essays can either make or break you. If your essay was good, they'd accept you even though you failed the entrance exam because essays don't test you how many formulas and names you've memorized, they test how you think.

I don't know if the university people would like how I think. 

I just want to ask you if you had any similar experiences and if I could still get permission to take the test despite the 4 rectangles of correction tape. I need my questions answered so that my mind would stop showing images of me on the streets, begging for spare change.

Thank you.

Wow, I feel better already.