so my life has been rolling like this:

1. i finally put the final end of my unhealthy relationship with my ex around 3 weeks ago. it affected me so hard, to the extent that i came to hate stupid love songs and love stories. which makes me hard to write anything, to be honest. i hope this phase will come down really soon, i really hope so, but now i'm still feeling bitter.
2. i need to lighten my borderline personality disorder first. it got worse since my separation and i hate this, i hate myself for being affected by it and that unfortunately worsens the BPD even more... yeah i'm pretty much ed up.
3. i'll be facing TOPIK (a kind of TOEFL test for Korean) and midterm next week and of the course i cannot face them with screwed up mind and emotion.

and my life priorities come like this:

1. managing emotions
2. TOPIK and midtests
3. updating fanfics

i have scheduled fics to start being written again in the end of oct, hopefully i'll be in the sane state at that moment. i've been thinking of killing chanyeol/baekhyun/minseok/anyone in my fics and that's ridiculous and i don't want that to happen haha. 시간에 멈춘 남자 should be up on christmas, i hope you're still anticipating it. baekhyun will appear in the next chapter of Show Me Your Color. and chanyeol will do something stupid in the next chanho oneshot in Our Moments. some many prompts coming into my brain, be it angsty or fluffy, and i hope i can execute them with judge.

thanks for reading my works, really. thank you very much. see you when i see you again.