EXO as your older brother

Suho : I'm not your brother, I'm your mother

Kris : I have to break it to you... I took all the tall genes from our parents. Also took all the artistic genes. And the handsome genes. And the y genes. And I'm not sorry for what I did.

Lay : I brought the pads you wanted for your period from 2 weeks ago. Sorry I forgot it but I brought them now~ .... wait don't periods only last for a few days? ... oh wells then, I guess you can just use it next month. It's in the washroom if you need it ... or maybe I paid and left it at the store... I don't remember ... wait ... who am I ... why am I buying pads for you ... who are you?

Baekhyun : You are suspecting me, your naturally born handsome brother is the one who stole your eyeliner? I mean like why would I? Not that I have a thing for eyeliners or anything!

D.O. : I know you're a girl and girls usually cook. I know you're my sister and I should go your way. BUT THIS IS MY KITCHEN! GET OUTTT! THIS KITCHEN IS MINEEE. M.I.N.E.  Don't come in unless you want food made by ME of course.

Chen : Hey, there. You know how we are related? My mom's mom's mom's mom is your mom's mom's mom's mom which makes us far away relatives. But then my dad's dad's dad's dad is your dad's dad's dad's dad so I'm not sure what that makes us. What is more confusing is that my mom's mom's mom is your mom's mom's mom and my dad's dad's dad is your dad's dad's dad. Which makes everything even more complicated. Adding onto that, my mom's mom is your mom's mom and my dad's dad is your dad's dad. CAN YOU BELIEVE HOW CONFUSING THIS CAN GET? My mom is your mom and my dad is you dad which makes us siblings! And you just wasted your time listening to me.

Xiumin : Say "I" - "want" - "baozis" - "for" - "dinner". Good, now say that to mom and dad to show that what you've learnt! And nod if they ask  'are you sure?'

Kai : WHY YOU NO SIT, ROLL OVER, AND FETCH LIKE OTHER DOGGIES? Oh right... you're human... not a dog. But hey, you can be a bitc* in the future! That's a female dog. I had always wanted a dog.

Luhan : I'm your brother, not your sister! And I'm not wearing that dress. I'm as manly as hell!!

Sehun : Don't come near me. I'll catch your cooties

Chanyeol : Aren't you happy that you have a normal brother like me? ... ... ... HAHAHHAA Don't you get it? Normal, me, normal. HAHHAHAHA

Tao : I refuse to be the older one

Cr. Luhunnie