DIARY: My Personal Thought about Writing
This will be a long blog post and, in my very own opinion, a boring one.
And, there it goes, my warning for you whom I appreciate so much for choosing to read this.
"If there's a book you really want to read, but it hasn't been written yet, then you must write it."- Toni Morrison
Ever since I was so little, I had started to read books. Well, books with pictures actually. I started to read short stories around six or seven years old. That's the age when I started to write stories as well.
I can't remember exactly why I started to write but I think it's somewhat like this; when I read something, I came to think like... what if the main character acted like this? Or what if the ending was different? What if another what-if condition played in my thought.
Starting to watch Japanese cartoon (anime) and read the Japanese comic (manga), the imagination didn't stop just like that. I came to add an imaginary character I wanted to portray in the story line -- and I actually still do this until now.
For example, when I watched Reply 1997, I imagined there's a girl who was also a close friend with Sung Shiwon and Yoon Yoonjae. A contrary to Shiwon's cheerful and straightforward attitude, she's so timid and introvert. What if she fell in love with Kang Joonhee when he only considered her as a best friend?
Things like that. Without changing the story line, I just imagine plot in my head while watching or reading anything I like. Delusional enough? LOL.
I started to read a novel when I was nine years old and then I started to become more attached to thicker books (in this case, the first book, Harry Potter novel) when I was eleven years old.
This drove me to fantasy genre which became my favorite genre in writing and reading at the same time. I used to create an alternate universe with mystical creatures and all.
At once I was thinking to become a professional writer. I think it's when I was around fourteen years old or so. My English was still far from even a beginner level and I didn't have any confidence.
Blogging is one of my best ways to relieve passion of writing. I started to blog since seven or eight years ago but, yes, writing a fictional story always amuses me even better.
If anyone asks me what hasn't changed about me since little, it's my passion for reading and writing.
"Writers are not just people who sit down and write. They hazard themselves. Every time you compose a book your composition of yourself is at stake."- E.L. Doctorow
Let me be honest here.
kyuri91 is an alter ego from my real life identity. Why? Because people around me (in real life) mostly don't know that I write on AFF (or even write at all).
No. It's not that I'm ashamed or else. I just want to separate my life as a girl who is trying to live her life as an office lady and a author-for-life. It feels so much better this way.
"Why don't you just become a professional writer then?"
It's a question I received so often... from my non-author friends.
Here's the thing. If you're an author, you definitely understand what I'm trying to say next. If you're not, it's fine, because I'm not complaining either. Everyone has their own parts in this world, right?
Writing is not easy (or, in this modern life, typing a story will fit this topic). For everyone who think writing is easy, you're misunderstanding a lot of things, dear.
If you think writers just type down whatever we want to in an hour or a day, it's far from reality. Sure, sometimes, writers who have the inspiration surround them could do that but, when writer's block hit, even sitting for a week can't help.
I can't explain to my friends about how difficult writing is. They too, sometimes, can't understand what difficult it is when I have so many imagination in my head.
Imagining and planning stories in my head are nothing compared to writing them down as word by word.
Anyone got what I mean? kkk~
Besides, let me share another fact, my country is not a book-nation. At least that's what I think.
From what I know, the most best-selling books here are romantic-genre and, lately, it's the fanfiction. Yes, Korean wave is overwhelming here that some publishers take their turns to publish fanfictions as books.
"Why don't you publish your written stories on AFF here?"
Some friends who know my alter ego as kyuri91 asked. Why? I don't know the exact answer but, even if I would, I will not use the whole name of idols I used here.
I think it's just my foolish pride.
Yes, Korean Wave is amazing at the moment. There is a possibility I can publish my fanfics and all but... isn't this will be just a one-moment-thingy only?
I don't know how to explain this feeling actually but, well, as you know, I'm not a professional writer at the moment.
Just a girl who works at a office and loves to write with all her heart. ;)
"Writing became such a process of discovery that I couldn't wait to get to work in the morning: I wanted to know what I was going to say."- Sharon O'Brien
Why do I write this? To brag about my not-so-dreams-came-true-life? To complaint about my incapable time management to update frequently here?
No.
Perhaps it's just thought or else but, lately, I came to realize that writing affects my life so much.
As a kid, writing was my target to reach in the future.
As I grew up, writing became my hobby, a passion I wanted to keep forever.
As a woman, writing is a part I can't separate from life.
My office life is quite busy (again) lately and I haven't updated any stories here. I even forced myself to stop plotting anything in head to focus but...
...I ended up feeling not so happy and stressful.
Apparently, imagination and writing are my source of happiness. They relieve me from stress and negative thoughts. Sure it's tiring with this point that I called double-life.
Wake up at 6 or 7 AM, arrive at office at 8 AM, leave the office at 5 or 6 PM, sit down in front of laptop at 7 or 8 PM, browsing or writing or anything until midnight, sleep for 6 hours and repeating again. My health sometimes in questions too sometimes but I find joy in writing.
Not the amount of subscribers. Not how many comments I receive after updating. Not about the views and anything else. To know people are reading my stories and enjoying them, it's more than enough.
Wake up at 6 or 7 AM, arrive at office at 8 AM, leave the office at 5 or 6 PM, sit down in front of laptop at 7 or 8 PM, browsing or writing or anything until midnight, sleep for 6 hours and repeating again. My health sometimes in questions too sometimes but I find joy in writing.
Not the amount of subscribers. Not how many comments I receive after updating. Not about the views and anything else. To know people are reading my stories and enjoying them, it's more than enough.
The point of my blog post tonight?
It's up to you who have took so many times to read this random post! ;)
Here I present you a quote which I can't agree more as the closing.
Thank you for reading.
“Write while the heat is in you. … The writer who postpones the recording of his thoughts uses an iron which has cooled to burn a hole with.”- Henry David Thoreau
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