I think I'm being stressed out right now because of my boyfriend and I...

And I'm writing this here to get some help because I'm still not sure if it's going to be a good idea for me to break up with him or not TT^TT

I asked my sister and my sister in law and they both said the same thing. Break up with him. But I'm not sure.. So I need you guys' idea or thinking really bad >.<

My boyfriend and I have been  dating for almost a year now, but HE doesn't trust me much =___=

He said that he 99% trust me but I don't even think it's 99% at all!! It's like 75% xp

I've never lied to him, but he always think that I'm lying to him. He thinks that I'm avoiding him but I'm not, BUT HE DOESN'T TRUST ME!!

Yesterday late at night we were messageing eachother on facebook and I posted up a status saying that, "I just remembered something!! When I see guys' their ex's I can tell who's their type of girl!! but it mostly works on kpop guys lol"

When he saw it he didn't like it. So he was kind of being sad and thinking too much again~ saying that he thought I quitted doing that, but it's kind of different from the other one I told him. I told him that when I look at a guy I can tell if they have a body or not [Got this ability by checking too much anime guys out LOL]

So he were having a talk about it and stuff~ But then my mom just got to come at that same time and yell at me to go to sleep!! So I told him that I need to go 'cause my mom yelled at me to go to sleep, BUT HE DID NOT BELIEVE ME!!! HE THOUGHT THAT I WAS LYING!!!! O\/O

He said that I'm just making excuses so I wouldn't get to answer his questions, BUT WHO THE WOULD DO THAT!!! THERE'S A SAYING THAT PEOPLE SHOULD ALWAYS FACE THEIR FEARS, AND THAT'S WHAT I WAS DOING!! FACING MY OWN FEARS!! I WOULD REGRET IT IF I DID AVOID HIS QUESTIONS!! And I posted that on facebook 'cause thats the only way for me to not do that again. It's just like when I study very hard for a test and then forget about everything I studied and learned after the test

And he keeps on thinking too much too!!!! He keeps on talking about him wanting to die 'cause he thinks he's useless and stuff and that there's no point for him to live anymore =___=

EVERY ING TIME HE TALKS AND THINKS STUPID LIKE THAT I ALWAYS GET PISSED AND I ALWAYS YELL AT HIM TO STOP, BUT HIS HEAD IS TOO STUPID TO UNDERSTAND ME WHEN I TELL HIM TO STOP THINKING LIKE THAT!! O\/O

UGH...

I do know that I'm also at fault too because of my stupid actions -.-

I kept on hanging out with my guy/girl friends and he didn't like it, so that's what I kind of changed about me and when I'm going to my next class he will usually come and take me to my next class, but I somehow don't like waiting 'cause I always feel awkward waiting for someone when  there's no one with me or to talk to 'cause all the people that stops in the hallway and wait are the african american people, mexican people, and white people. Some of them are asians too, BUT THEYRE ALWAYS ON THEIR PHONE AND IPOD UNLIKE ME WHO DOES NOT HAVE ANY ELECTRONICS WITH ME. YOU KNOW HOW AWKWARD THAT IS!!! IT'S EXTREMELY AWKWARD FOR ME TO JUST STAND THERE AND LOOK AROUND AT OTHER PEOPLE WHILE WAITING FOR QUITE A LONG TIME FOR THAT PERSON TO COME.

So I don't really wait for him to come but I always try to walk slow and look for him but sometimes when I do that I already reached my class -__-

So I just go in and look at the door for him if he came or not..

On friday he thought that I was avoiding him because on that day me and my sisters woke up late for school and my stupidass brother did not wake us up!! o\/o

So we got dropped off at school and we got there late xp

When I saw my boyfriend he asked me where was I 'cause we usually meet at the atrium and I told him that me and my sisters woke up late, but he was like "No! you lying!" o.0

*Really. REALLY!! YOU DON'T EVEN EN DAMN BELIEVE THAT TOO!!! I WAS NOT EVEN IN MY EN DAMN CLASS whEN THE BELL RANG!! I GOT THERE AT SCHOOL 10 MINUTES LATER!! WTF* That was what I was saying in my head. I was really mad too

Sigh.. Gosh. I just hate it so much when he question me so many questions!!! He asks me like, "Do you trust me?" "Do you love me?" "Why do you love me?"

*OMFG!!! I ALREADY EN DAMN ANSWERED THOSE QUESTIONS!!! HOW MANY EN DAMN TIMES ARE YOU GOING TO ASK ME!!!*

And my answers are always the same. "Yes, I do trust you *but you just don't trust me*" "Yes, I do love you *If I didn't I would've said no!*" And.. I said something corny so I'm not gonna share that one lol xp

Sigh... And he wants me to tell him everything first!! I do get that in a relationship, but there are stuff that are hard for me to tell him, so I tell my friend about it first..  And there are times I don't want to tell him some stuff when I talk with my [girl] friends 'cause mostly they're dumb useless conversations about friends and sometimes it's about girls stuff like important needs~ [PADS]

Gosh... And right now I'm like thinking that I'm actually not even ready to be in a relationship right now too because of this experience

And if we do break up then I have a feeling that he's just going to do something REALLY REALLY STUPID and be REALLY REALLY SAD

AND THE MOST ANNOYING-EST THING THAT'S GONNA HAPPEN ON FACEBOOK FOR SURE IS THAT HE'S GOING TO BE POSTING UP STATUS' THAT HE'S SAD AND HE WANTS TO DIES AND THAT HE'S USELESS AND STUFF AND THAT IS JUST GOING TO MAKE ME FEEL REGRET!!!

YOU KNOW ANNOYING THAT SH*T IS!! IT'S LIKE PEOPLE BULLYING YOU, MAKING YOU FEEL BAD AND SAD THAT YOU JUST WANT TO COMMIT SUICIDE. Ugh..

I did thought about breaking up with him 'cause he's really pissing me of these days about this and I don't feel like I'm a good gf for him and most of all~ HE DOES NOT TRUST ME.

I told him mostly all my secrets. EVEN MY NUMBER ONE SECRET!!! BUT HE DOESN'T EVEN TRUST ME IN THIS RELATIONSHIP!!!! AND HE SAYS THAT HE REALLY REALLY LOVES ME TOO!! O\/O

IF HE REALLY DO LOVE ME THEN WHY WON'T HE TRUST ME!! I'M NOT HIS EX!! HIS EX MAY HAVE DONE THAT TO HIM BUT NOT ME!!!

Sigh.. What should I do? Should I just break up with him? What's your idea(s)? I really need more help from others so please leave a reply for me. I don't care if it's you, b*tching at me or an 'I don't know' reply. I just want a reply from every person that read from my blog because I really need some advise and help right now'cause I think I can't take it anymore T^T

[I don't want a 'It's your decision' reply though lol I hear it from my friends so many times that it doesn't help me at all that I just want to cry.. The 'I don't know' replies are okay because I really don't know what to do too and it tells me that you putted yourself in my situation ^^ ]

AND SORRY FOR THIS LONG BLOG *bows a thousand times* >.<