I’m pretty sure we’ve heard of the Kai incident where he was pushed by a fan into a trash can and then left to limp to the terminal along with his managers. My source of EXO news comes from crazed, obsessed fan girls on tumblr who all claim to be “mature” and “respectful” of their idols. I’ll never hurt my idol, they said.  They need to be respected, they’re human beings! They said.

Now let me laugh for a bit at the hypocrisy of it all.

Now before you start being -hurt over what I just said, let me tell you something. I am a selective school student which ensures I have an IQ or at least grades that puts me in the 5% of the student population, I have a mother diagnosed with cancer twice which I have had to look after ever since I was a child. I’ve won writing competitions, art competitions and gotten excellent grades in my musical exams and I still simply CANNOT call myself mature. Because that would be extremely laughable. Just bring out some bubble wrap and see how immature I can truly get.

Maturity is not determined by how you dress or even how you carry yourself, it is a measure of moral, social, emotional and intellectual development. At your teen years (most kpop fans are in their pre-teens and teens according to countless surveys) it is literally impossible to be mature in all of these areas. I’m a philosophy student, I have experienced firsthand what true inconsistency of morals is and if you want to argue with me on this, bring it on because I will win (not being arrogant, it’s because I have studied this for an entire semester).

Now all of you people saying that you respect your idols and would NEVER do anything to hurt them, you may not intend to but you may hurt them indirectly. I thought I’d be composed when I went to a KPOP concert in Sydney since I’m so socially awkward, I’m practically immune to the opposite gender, but I was among all those fans screaming like a dinosaur. Or maybe even louder. Humans are unpredictable, you can’t say you wouldn’t push your idol if you saw them, because that would mean you were overestimating your own abilities to control yourself. Get off of your ing high horse.

So what? A fan pushed him, not intentionally I’m hoping and I certainly don’t endorse that kind of behaviour but please, stop using these instances as a pathetic excuse to look down on these “crazed” fan-girls. Because you just might be the same.

There’s something called herd mentality. It causes people to do things they would NEVER do on a normal day to day basis. Herd mentality is what allowed American troops to massacre the village of My Lai even thought the victims were completely innocent. Don’t overestimate yourself and don’t use these examples to look down on others.

It’s hypocrisy, pure and simple. 

What would true respect to an idol be? A respect of his/her privacy would probably be the greatest gift you could give them. Often, by being a fan who loves from afar, makes you the BEST kind of fans.

There was a touching story told by a famous American actor, I won’t mention who about the fan that will stay in his heart forever. He got onto a plane, in business class of course since he’s filthy rich and got allocated a seat next to a nice, blonde lady with a baby in her arms. They hit off and had a great conversation and when her baby started crying, she let him cradle her baby since it seemed to like his face. He was a little baffled, due to his mind-boggling fame and asked at the end of the flight if she knew he was. She replied that she’d followed his career form the start and was probably, his number one fan. But due to respect, and because she didn’t want to attract attention to him, she stayed quiet and treated him like a human being.

That level of self control is amazing and that respect shows how much she truly cares for his well-being. This is, what I think should be a model for us all, then our “precious” idols probably wouldn’t be stalked and pushed into trashcans. Or given menstrual pads as gifts.

Show me one video of a live performance by EXO and trust me, I will start spazzing. If they were right in front of me, I highly doubt I’d be able to stay composed. Fans, instead of shifting blame one another, let’s just try to learn from people like her.

That is all. Thank you.

-charmallama