Title  (4/5)
Your title was creative and it really suits your story, plus it's not a very commonly used title so good job here.

Appearance  (5/5)
Your poster was really nice and it gave off the angst theme of your story, and your background blended in well too, so I gave you full marks for this component, and you credited.

Description/ Foreword (13/15)
It was intriguing for me, because I was able to grasp the gist of the story quite well. You didn't not leak too much information about the story, keeping sufficient suspense so I was really interested to know more. I deducted marks because there are just one or two minor grammar errors. But it was good all in all.

Plot/ Originality (21/25)
Your storyline was rather cliché but you wrote it really well, the story was very vivid and clear to me, I liked it a lot. But the plot is too common, there are a lot stories on Jessica being abused and forced to sell herself, but your plot was amazing, describing Jessica's distress and problems while slowly revealing her past, I loved it.

Characterization (8/10)
Your characters' personality etc were well expressed throughout your story so it was very clear. Your character's emotions and all were conveyed well so they were all pretty realistic.

Writing (Spelling/Grammar/Punctuation) (14/20)
Your writing is okay, but your grammar can be improved, maybe you can seek some help from a beta reader (?) You tend to mix up your tenses but it isn't that bad, your grammar mistakes were mostly quite minor, so I would say your writing was not bad. (But frequent grammatical errors is a major turn off for me, so I guess I deducted quite a lot of marks in this component because of your grammar.) I won't list out your mistakes for you because that would be beta reading.

Flow (8/10)
The flow of your story was generally fine, not too fast or slow and I like how you kept the suspense at the end of several chapters, it hooks on the reader. I couldn't stop reading once I started^~^

Overall Enjoyment (9/10)
I really enjoyed reading your story! It was interesting. And honestly speaking, it would make up a rather good story, ignoring your few grammatical errors here and there.

Total (82/100) 

-Bbuing_bbuing