My stalker is still at large! How can a very good group of friends, best friends, that turn into a miserable failure? My first ex-fiancé, my stalker, my 2nd ex-fiancé...Showa 62 is no longer the happy bunch we once were >.< I've lost most of my best friends who thought I was the one who cheated on them...when I caught them in bed with another woman, in our house?

My current secretary--boyfriend is also in Show 62, but he left the group because of those 2 and my obsessed stalker >.< why did things turn out this way?

I'm back to work now, but things are worse than before! I've not had a break, even when I was in hospital to cure for my depression...now? I'm busier than before...but I still have time to "stalk" YunJae via twitter!! But sometimes, the things on twitter makes me depressed >.< HoMin/JYJ stans fighting with each other...they have to involve Cassies, who love all 5! Individual fans turn against each other!

Lastly, I'm feeling mug better from my depression with work^^ it has kept me occupied^^ the medicine has decreased from 20 kinds to now, 15 tablets^^ it's a good sign, isn't it? I have to see the psychiatrist once a week still >.<

But prior to returning to work, on Thursday, I had this suicidal thoughts going through my mind!  Frid morning, I took the butter knife...thankfully, my boyfriend came in time^^ but now, he is keeping me under close watch >.< is it good that his my secretary? I really don't know...

But don't worry, despite my mood swings, I'm now happy, I think my boyfriend has stood by me.

I promise, I won't have such thoughts again!

but I'd love to thank @imasein, @byul_mi and my lovely sister @karijaemin for being there for me and keep encouraging me...I don't know what will happen if I don't have you to talk it out with me^^

I owe you my life^^ please be there for me in future too^^ and don't forget, I'll be there for you too^^