Hello.. It's been awhile..
I guess life has been ty on me lately.. combo my sudden outburst about my past frustration. I don't really used to tell people about it. Yet, I can't help it today.
I know i shouldnt have done that but things got unwind real quick. I feel unfair, I feel hurt, I feel like screaming yet what can I do. mumm it quietly. Hatred is something that I wish to just throw it aside like nobody bussiness. stop being an utterly liar and hypocrite to myself and others. Sometime I just one to cry as much as I could and say whatever I wanted to. Yet, as stupid it may be, I will end up feeling it not worth it. I guess I will learn to say what I want to bit by bit. How I wish. I got exam tomorrow, workshop to direct to, some annoying pest to think.
With the finals coming, a tons of unthinkable problem arise. combo with some hidden problem that I just discover. Now, I can't even mention about money problem. luckily I' done in few month. Yet still, all the loans still gonna me headache. As selfish I wanna think I seriously don't want to bother saving other people right now. But well, in the world which is full of unfairness you got to do what you got to do and survive yourself otherwise you're gonna sunk deeper in some -hole.
Gosh my colourful words..
Suddenly it reminds me of my school-year diary. haha.. Its been years since I stop writing. why? its easy, when your asian mom read it, then its done deal then. I can still remember how betrayed I feel back then. I guess my feelings doesnt even worth it I guess. Med school yet, life to I guess.
I really hope my plans later on works well tho.. as stupid as it seems, I just wanna fly and work elsewhere, travel around, enjoy mylife, and be the financially independent person that I dearly want to be? Impossible?
Nah even the fact that I'm standing here finishing my med school does sound the most stupid thing that I've heard. I survived this roller coaster, of course i'll try my best to take a leap forward.
Live a life.