yonggeun: i pretend i'm all edgy but in reality, i go to bed at at 7:30
doyoun: no offense, hyung, but nobody thought you were edgy in the first place

yonggeun: is anyone else scared?
doyoun: not really, i've already lived longer than i've expected.

doyoun: what's up with jisoo?
geumwoo: he's just a little overwhelmed
doyoun: why?
geumwoo: yonggeun giggled

doyoun: i'm a ninja
geumwoo: no you're not
doyoun: yes i am. did you see that?
geumwoo: what
doyoun: exactly

doyoun: the between two gas stations on the same intersection.
sam: i'm so sick of this . two gas stations can't even be the same block without some walnut shipping them, while i can't find a single fic for dennys/applebees with dennys bottoming.
kihyuk: you're literally out of your mind if you think dennys isn't a top
geumwoo: i wish the 2012 apocalypse actually happened.

doyoun: hyung the house is on fire!
sam, in bed: .....
sam: like, how big is the fire?

geumwoo: tall people are my only enemy
koji: i can't even see you hating from all the way down there.
geumwoo: i will tie your shoelaces together and you won't even know until it's too late.

doyoun, ordering a cake over the phone: yes, blue frosting please
shop employee: okay and what would you like your cake to say?
doyoun, covering the phone, turning to look at the rest of paradox: do we want a talking cake?

geumwoo: sungwon and i don't have pet names for each other.
sam: uh huh...
sam: so do you know what bees make?
geumwoo: honey?
sungwon from the other room: yes babe?
sam: don't lie to my face again

geumwoo: *falls downstairs*
koji: *catches him* i think you just
koji:
koji:
koji: fell for me
geumwoo: put me down

dispatch: *following yonggeun around*
boss: any news?
dispatch: he stole something.
boss: omg what
dispatch: my heart :')

sam: are you in love with sungwon?
geumwoo: *sweating* ...no
sam: then why do you draw 'S+G' in hearts everywhere?
geumwoo: it stands for suffering and grief

koji: hey, how much money do you have?
doyoun: 69 cents
koji: ay, you know what that means
doyoun, crying: i don't have enough money for chicken nuggets

geumwoo: we have the type of relationship where we finish each other's-
sungwon: sentences
geumwoo: don't interrupt me.

*arriving at hogwarts*
yonggeun: *prepares to sit for the sorting hat*
sorting hat: HUFFLEPUFF!
yonggeun: but i didn't even wear you yet?
sorting hat: it's your first day and you're already making friendship bracelets
yonggeun: well, it's never too early to make memories!

ghost: boo!
yonggeun: *gets teary eyed*
ghost: omg i'm sorry please don't cry

sam: i'm gonna ask you to be respectful.
geumwoo: i will politely decline.

yonggeun: you aren't coming with me?
jisoo: yonggeun, i'm not your mom
yonggeun:
jisoo, handing yonggeun a lunchbox: here are your sandwiches. i'll pick you up at five.

sam: okay we gotta get through this locked door, mystic quick give me your credit card.
mystic: here.
sam, pocketing it: cool. doyoun kick the door down

doyoun: i did the mbti test recently
koji: oh, i'm an enfj
sam: no, you're

kidnapper: we have your child
mystic: i don't have a child?
kidnapper: then who just asked for warm milk and made us cut the crusts off their sandwich?
mystic: oh god, you have yonggeun

koji: i have the height advantage
geumwoo: your kneecaps don't

doyoun: i hate when people are like "on a scale of 1-10" bold of you to assume i can count

doyoun: *hears a bang*
doyoun: *picks up geumwoo & yonggeun*
doyoun: HYUNGS GRAB THE SMALL ONES FIRST THEIR TINY LEGS ARE USELESS

koji: what can i say? i'm charming and irresponsible
geumwoo: did you mean irresistible?
koji: no

paradox: wow doyoun has his serious face on i wonder what he's thinking about
doyoun's mind: *wii music*

geumwoo: ever since doyoun learned about stan language he's been going around talking like he's on twitter
doyoun: oof, the call out. the tea is scorching.
geumwoo: please stop.

instructor: welcome to salsa class! are you ready to learn how to dance?
doyoun: *hiding a bag of chips* there's been a misunderstanding

geumwoo: i feel sad.
yonggeun: i have emotional jumper cables! i'll boost you. just attach them like so...
geumwoo: this is just a hug.
yonggeun: is it working?
geumwoo: ...yeah.

doyoun: do you think i can fit fiteen marshmallows in my mouth?
geumwoo: you're a hazard to society.
keumsan: and a coward. do twenty.

woovin: yonggeun might be one of the elder members of the rap team but he has what we call "baby boy energy"
keumsan: wha-
woovin: *points at yonggeun who has squished himself onto one
cushion on the couch*
keumsan:
yonggeun: *waving with sweater paws* hi guys!
keumsan: ,,, i see

geumwoo: why are you ??
mystic, sitting in bed: i don't have any clothes.
geumwoo, opening his wardrobe: sure you do; you have lots. like this shirt, this jacket, hey fly, these jeans-

doyoun: girls are hot.
doyoun: guys are hot.
doyoun: why is everyone so hot?
geumwoo: global warming.

doyoun: i'm gay.
mystic: water's wet. paradox is talented. fly is hot.
doyoun: what
mystic: sorry, i thought we were listing obvious things.
fly: did you say i'm hot?

geumwoo: has anyone seen mystic?
doyoun: wait, i got you.
doyoun: fly is ugly!
mystic: *crashes through door*
mystic: i'lL THEM UP

doyoun: i need to say something. and i don't want any criticism or judgement what so ever.
mystic: and you came to me?

***

mystic: sometimes i can't stand you
sam: ...you think i'm happy to be stuck with you?
mystic: you're the one who insisted on going to this place to eat
sam: well you're the one who insisted on sitting in the corner booth so i can't get out
geum: you're both stupid

mystic: babe, do you want a ride with my car?
doyoun: the toy one?
mystic: it's red tho
doyoun:
doyoun: hELL YEAH

woovin: i would say i dabble in the gay.
yonggeun: *exists*
woovin: nevermind....i'm all gay

doyoun: can you teach me how to hoe?
koji: rude.
koji: *sips wine*
koji: but yes.

doyoun: yesterday i yote my phone down the stairs by accident
geumwoo: did you just...use "yeet" in past tense?

yonggeun: you believe me?
geumwoo: yonggeun, you're the last good person on this planet. I'd believe cartoon birds braided your hair this morning.

jisoo: *pacing around* i have to be tough on the boys so that we can debut and be successful.
yonggeun: *smiles*
jisoo: screw being tough, yonggeun, i love you, keep on doing you, my boy <3

geumwoo: kihyuk, care to explain why we have 6 dogs in our apartment?
kihyuk: they're golden retrievers. they retrieve gold. i did this for us.

sam: i am the kind of person that likes to think things through.
geumwoo: since when? i once saw you eat a marshmallow that was still on fire.

geumwoo: what are you bringing with you to dinner?
mystic: my negative attitude and sparkling personality

jisoo: anyone else feel really good when the brain releases endorphins?
geumwoo: can't relate
doyoun:
doyoun: why would my brain release dolphins?

yonggeun: is it okay if i swear?
jisoo: yes, i'll allow you to swear
yonggeun: f...
jisoo: go on
yonggeun: i'm nervous

*doyoun meeting koji for the first time*
koji: hi, i'm koji and you are?
doyoun: questioning my uality

geumwoo, wakes up: *hears screaming* *walks out of his room*
geumwoo, enterting keumsan's room: what's going o-
keumsan, crouching in front of alarm clock: EH EH EH. HOW DOES THAT FEEL. EH EH EH

geumwoo: i may be short, but that doesn't mean i'm innocent! *aggressively tries to open a caprisun*
sam:
sam: would you like me to open it for you?
geumwoo, voice cracking: yes, please.

koji: you look stressed
geumwoo: thanks, it's the stress

doyoun: chillaxxx
geumwoo: that's not a word
doyoun: sometimes the ones who deny 'chillax' are the ones who need to chillax the most

stuffed animal: *has fur covering its eyes*
yonggeun: *gently fixes it*
yonggeun: you can see now

doyoun: you know that little sea bug with the stupid hands and it has a home but it changes homes sometimes because it gets too big for it??? what is it??
geumwoo: hermit crab??

koji: i'm so useless
geumwoo: nah, you're not
geumwoo: you can be used as a bad example

doyoun: truth or dare
mystic: truth
doyoun: what's your credit card number
mystic: dare
doyoun: tell me your credit car number

manager: ok let's be real. is any of you straight? at least one of you?
rap team:
doyoun: *slowly raises hand*
mystic: *slowly lowers doyoun's hand*

doyoun: *sneezes*
keumsan, from inside the vents: bless you
doyoun, looking around with wide eyes: god?

koji: how's the most handsome person in the world doing?
doyoun: i don't know, how ar-
mystic, from the other side of the room: i'm doing great

geumwoo: i like to wear sungwon's hoodies because they have long sleeves so i can-- *smacks koji*

someone: i personally, don't like yonggeun at all.
keumsan: i personally, i think, in my estimation, according to me, to my way of thinking, what i say is, my thought is, in my opinion, after much deliberation i have concluded that you need to shut up.

*texting*
yonggeun: good morning, jisoo! let's get this bread
jisoo: please send me a picture of the bread you want. i will see if the store carries it. love you.