Yes...i am still alive....

Now...why am i not updating anything??

Actually...i still love yunjae...i still believe in them...and i promise not to abandon my fics....

Its just recently i am dealing with my own love life

Yeah....well...an is courting me for about 11months now and no plans of giving up....

However...the man courting me is legally married....

I was trap.....by his charms and his persistence....

Its complicated...

It was like...he want to own me....because he dont want only friendship....

He said he want connection...love...affection...and lust...

I was struggling....on what to do...of course anyone will tell me..its bad...its a sin to be with a married guy....surely it is....

But everything was messed up and complicated.....and in the end...we became official....

An agreement was made....no phone calls, no sending messages....no cheesy words such as i love you s....no words like baby, babe...darling....

Act like nothing...no flirts...do nothing....just plain talk....

I dont even understand why i ended up saying yes to this guy....

And from the word saying yes.....now my bed is full of stuff toys......i should be happy...but of course....i also should not........

Because, i was stuck in the middle of situation were i experience in actual things that i only read on some yunjae fic out there