I'm just giving you guys on an update on how i have been doing. well my life is still ty but i'm slowly moving away from him. yeah i still love him and i do  canre for him more as a friend than a lover. but i still love his stupid . i just get jelly sometimes that he looks so happy with his life now and i'm over here being all sad and . but im happy that hes finally happy but i just miss him at this point. and i do want to get together with him. i wanted to spend my bday (which is on Valintines day) with him. and i would cry here and there because i know that he won't ever love me again. i just wish i knew what went wrong in the relationship but at the same time i don't want to. it's just so confusing becasue ik i care for him deeply but idk if it's more as friends or lovers. bc my heart says lovers but mind says friends. and i just want this to be done and over with and that he would come back to me. but i honestly shouldn't even care anymore i just can't stop loving him. but my feeeling have been dropping slowly and i am trying to make myself feel better and your girl is still trying to recover. but i'll update you guys when i can. 

thanks to those who actually reads these things becasue it means the world to me to know that you guys are okay with listening to my sob story. thank you and you are all so sweet and beautiful. i hope you guys have a better life than me.