Jonghyun's death seems legit, and I had enough
I hope it's not true, but the evidences are overwhelming. I can't deny it anymore. My family's having a party downstairs while I'm so ing emo right now in my room.
Tho SM hasn't stated anything yet (as far as I've seen, maybe they have), I can't deny it anymore. His sister confirmed, the police confirmed, news are everywhere and even some celebrities are already saying their condolences for him.
I... I really don't know what to do anymore. Call me stupid for acting all depressed, but Jonghyun was and IS special to me. I got into kpop from listening to his voice. He's so special to me and you can't fight me on this. I'm not gonna get all crazy, starve myself and try to join him to death or something but... I'm almost as broken as the time when I heard news that my teacher and dear friend died in a tragic incident. I've lost so many people this year, and watch people lose them as well.
I knew that something wasn't right with him a few years back, when his weight started to drop and everything. He.. didn't have the same light as he does back then. I didn't know it'll come to this ing disaster. What I'm even more scared of is that he's not going to the good place, if you know what I mean. Which means his death had just welcomed an eternity of pain.
I'm officially depressed, so.. I'll either stop writing until I'm over with this, or I'll write till my nails falls off.
Jonghyun, there's probably no use in saying this and all but, we love you. I'm cringing at myself for acting so emo and moping around like this but I had enough. I just can't anymore. He's such a gem to me. I don't know what to do anymore. It feels so heavy to type right now. My fingers could barely move, I just want to cry. Every one is precious, and I wish I could've done something.
You did good, Jonghyun. You did really, really good... If only the last thing you did was good too.
IF ALL THIS TURNED OUT TO BE SOME BS, DEAR LORD I WISH YOU HAVE THINGS COMING FOR YOU.
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