Should I even bother returning?

I try to write good content, but lately I just can't seem to take the time to write even when time is available. To my subscribers, I'm sorry. I know you have invested lots of time reading my stories. I wonder if they're even good, you know? 

I'm always open to critiques. I do a lot of self insert stories, I mean A LOT. I wonder if you guys get sick of it. 

Seems a lot of people have been subscribing only to stop reading and unsubscribe. It makes me wonder if I'm wasting my time, when I could spending else where. I love writing and getting lost in my own little fantasy worlds, but am I the only one benefiting from it?

I feel lost right now. People have told me to write for myself and don't worry about what other people think, but is it a fruitless venture? I don't know anymore. I mean best case senario, my kids have something to remember me by. 

Perhaps its the two orange juice and rum drinks I've drank tonight, but they say that people are the most truthful drunk, but I feel like I'm failing. Failing my subscribers, failing everyone who looks up to me, you know? It .

Please. Give me advice. Give me direction. Tell me the honest truth. Using my favorite Brandy song as a reference. "Should I go? Should I stay? I'm in control either way." What should I do?