My Current Status

Okay. So I know a lot are looking for me since I have been MIA here for a pretty long while. I'm posting this to tell you all why.

 

I'm kinda dealing with anxiety right now and I have been really really off, more so recently. I can't really stay focused for long and I get anxiety attacks from time to time. I am really sorry. But because of this, I can't really write even a short chapter. I often get suicidal ideas but don't worry, they were just thoughts, I have never (so far) considered actually doing it. But, you get the idea. Basically, my mental state is in chaos right now. I am trying to get a grip of myself but it's kinda hard. I have always been weak to stress and now that I'm in my senior year in college, it's getting a lot more stressful than before. I hope my state will improve once things settled down into a familiar routine. But for now, I can't really promise anything. I am really sorry.

 

If you follow me on twitter, you might've seen some of my cryptic tweets about stuff that relates to this.

 

Again, I'm sorry.

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Comments

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TheDiamondMaiden #1
Hey,don't you worry. Crossroads such as college admissions are always stressful but they always turn for the better,you shall be okay. Don't you worry.
xiuseokjin #2
oh my, i was wondering where you went. i became worried too. im glad to hear something from u again but im sad to hear that you were having a hard time... i hope that you stay strong and please refrain from thinking of suicidal thoughts :( there will always be people who will be there for you in the darkest of times. ❤ dont let all your feelings or thoughts bottle up inside you... they will all fade away sooner or later. its okay to feel weak and sad at times! that is normal. but know that ur not alone. i hope you have someone to rely on and share these thoughts to - a friend, a family member, or a special someone. also, i dont know what your religion is or if you have one, but you can always turn to God for help and strength.

You can do it! good luck to your studies! ^^ Fighting!!! :D
Kingkongugly #3
Hey there :") I just want to hug you right now but since I couldn't, I hope you will be okay soon.

Well, I don't know what your problem is but I promise you everything will be okay at the end. If it's not then it's definitely not the end. Maybe it sounds cliché but trust me, it's true. You will be okay.

And I don't want to mean anything but I tried to suicide once. Well just in last summer (I forgot it's 2017 already ._. ). I really did. But don't worry, I'm still fine, you see :"> And I'm still focusing on becoming a better me. I just want to say that there is so much more beautiful things out there for you to enjoy. And it's okay if you don't feel good and sometimes you just want to let go everything like you don't even care. It's okay if you want to cry out of the blue. It's fine. But please remember, you have your family, you have friends who want to help you anytime. Tell them your problems. Maybe they can't understand it, maybe they can't solve it but trust me, talking your problem out loud helps a lot. Like a lottttttttt. I mean it.

And hey, you will be fine. Don't stress yourself too much. Love you xoxo

P/s: my english is really really .-. sorry ;A;
lucky_s #4
be happy
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