Warning: deep blog is so deep you may sink to the bottom.

Today was my last day as an aupair. I'm flying home on Saturday but I have tomorrow off.  

I . Can't believe it.

Do you guys have those moments when you judt refuse to wrap your mind around SOMETHING?

I can't believe that I have done this all 

From August to now.. 

Five months passed. I took care of kids like it's my second nature. Learnt how to run a house. Got to know people. Saw behind the scenes when it comes to Scotland. 

I grew up 

I remember when I started writing. I was just your usual ugly duckling with no friends. Bullied for trying too hard to fit in. I developed a ing stutter in my own language fot gods sake. Things were falling apart but I tried so hard..

Writing took my mind off my worries. So I buried myself in my hobbies. Got many readers.. the fame got to my head sometimes haha. 

Then my last year of school came and I lost all my motivation to do anything. I often just lay in bed and did nothing. Slept through the afternoon. Made posters from time to time but my heart was somewhere else. 

Uni made it even worse. I was basically a Noone by then, struggling to even get out of bed in time for classes. ed up from time to time and drew plenty of people away. 

So after my second year was over there is just... decided to say it and leave a bit. It happened on the last day of July.  I ended up as an aupair, for two families in the end. And I changed guys.  

I hold my head high now. I SMILE. 

Because I could do this. Despite the issues.  The kids being silly. Me thinking it was too much. 

I did this and I would do it again if I could. I'm so ing  thankful for this half year I spent here. I mean there were really bad times.  But I did it and I am so capable of even more.  

I feel like a different person and it's scary in a way. But I also know that from now on there's nothing that can stop me.

And now just for the cringe factor here are some photos of me in the past year and then now XD warning the newest one has my head all ugly but I had 20 minutes to get ready AND was having troubles with my face being all puffed up (being a girl is hard isn't it lol) so..  it's just crazy how different my body looks lol  still got weight to lose but I think I've gone a long way already XD

Past me until now. And nowww. Kata the new xD