I didn't write about it last year because I did my very best to push away the loss of my closest friend and move on with my life... But it's been a year and my dreams were wrought with her face and I can't get her off my mind right now. 

It was not easy walking away but holding on started to drain me and leave me feeling quite empty. It was even harder getting back on my feet and learning to be a person without her. If I'm being honest, I'm not quite sure I'm a person yet without her. I am and will always be grateful for the time we shared and the values I've learned from her. 

While it does hurt less every day to the point where I no longer feel it, sometimes when I see her, I want to walk up to her and hug her. I am yet to quell that instinct. 

It's very easy to slip into a 'what went wrong, how could I have fixed it' thought loop but I've accepted that it simply wasn't meant to be. No matter how much we both promised to stay friends, life, distance and time simply got in the way. 

I miss you. Maybe I always will, maybe it'll go away completely one day.